Date: Thu, 10 Aug 2006 17:39:32 +0000
From: Steve Thomas <stevethomas535@hotmail.com>
Subject: Just-a-Normal-Boys-Dreams, Ch 27

This is a work of pure fiction, but based on the author's feelings,
beliefs, and in some cases, experience.  Come to think of it -- it might
not be very pure either! There may be graphic sexual encounters at times
between men, so if this offends you, you are invited to retreat.  If you
are too young or it is otherwise illegal for you to be reading this kind
if story, shame on you for reading it - - please stop here.  If not, - -
ENJOY!

Cast of characters:

Jack Smith -- uh -- that would be me

Billy -- Jack's closest brother, 3 yrs older.

Will Smith -- My dad

Vivian Smith My mom

Art -- Jack's oldest brother, 9 yrs older.

Ralph Gilmore -- a new friend - deceased

Stacy Whitworth -- a catalyst/friend

George Toliver -- old grade school buddy

George Toliver, Sr,  -- (duh!)

Cynthia Toliver -- (Mrs. Duh!)

Jim Walls-- George's cousin

Uncle Jake Smith-- Will's Brother

Aunt Lindy -- Uncle Jake's wife

Seth Gary -- One of Jake and Lindy's other nephews

Etta -- The Jacob Smith's housekeeper.

Jake Smith Jr. Jack's cousin

Colin -- Jake's partner

Carrie Smith -- Another of the Smith cousins

Al -- Carrie's Partner

Chris Gary -- Seth's older brother.

Craig -- Chris's partner

Mario -- Old high school friend

Terrence Moynahan -- Carmel Architect

Casey Bell -- Terrence's attorney

Ryan Crayson-- my husband

Ryan Jr. (Rye) -- Our son

Ranee -- Our daughter.

Harold --  the butler

From Chapter 26:

"I'm so sorry -- Jack -- to be such trouble!" Ryan said, lying in the
ambulance.  His head then flopped to the right -- away from me -- and he
was out again, as suddenly as he seemed to wake up.

The young paramedic was sitting right next to me, but again -- for the
second time in a short time, I closed my eyes to talk to God.  I held
Ryan's hand in my own and prayed mightily that God would save my
sweetheart once again.

When I was finished, the young man next to me said, "Amen".  I looked
over and he had tears in his eyes too.  "You'd be surprised how many
prayers are uttered in this vehicle!"  he said.  I took his hand and
brought it up and put it next to my face.

"Thank you!"  I said.

"I think Mr. Crayson will be okay.  He's done so much for our emergency
center. And hospital!  He's GOTTA be!"

We pulled into the emergency room again, and they wheeled him in,
followed by me, stumbling behind -- in my underwear.  But I was past
noticing.

Chapter 27

"Dad?"  Said a fearful looking Rye.

"Rye!  Son!  How did you -- I mean - "

"I called Pop's cell phone to ask him -- well that doesn't matter, but
then Harold answered it!  He told me Pop was on his way to the hospital.
I was halfway here already so I turned around and came here.  Um -- your
naked!  What happened?"

I told him as gently as I could the details of the afternoon.
"Rae-rae's gonna flip out!"  Said Rye.  "She was worried about this,
anyway.  And she is gonna take it really bad that Pop would try to leave
her like this."

"Yeah.  I know."  I said, too shaken to hide my own feelings.

"Oh, dad!  I'm sorry!"

What irony!  Ryan's son was consoling me!  I put my arm around his
shoulders.  "Rye -- how are you feeling -- about it?"

"Well, I guess I'm a little numb.  So much has happened!  But, like
Rae-rae, I was almost expecting something -- but afraid to put it into an
actual -- um -- thought, I guess.  Dad, Pop has suffered so much trauma -
"

"Trauma?  Where did you pick up a word like that?"

"I've talked to Uncle Seth about it - - too."  He looked down as if he
were ashamed.

"That's wonderful -- I mean that you talked to him.  Why would you feel
bad?"

"Dad, I didn't want to hurt your feelings -- by talking to him -- but I
also -- know -- that you are hurting too."  He then started sobbing and
threw his arms around me and we both cried for a few moments until
someone called my name.

"Mr. Smith?  Mr. Jack Smith?"

I turned around and the receptionist -- or maybe the triage nurse --
beckoned to me.  I started walking in her direction, then turned and
grabbed Rye's hand and dragged him with me.

"I'm Jack Smith."

"Mr. Crayson is asking for you."  She said, as she handed me a scrub
uniform to wear.

"Can my son come too?"  I asked.

"If he's over eighteen."

"I am -- but -- Dad -- maybe you should go first, and -- well -- maybe
he only wants to talk to you -- at least at first.  He may not say
everything he wants to if I'm there."

I thought about that.  I thought about how mature and grown up our boy
was becoming.  I felt such a tremendous swelling in my chest from pride,
while at the same time my heart was hurting.  Such diverse emotions all
at once!

"Is there a place in there for my son to wait while I talk to Mr.
Crayson?"

"Certainly.  Mr. Crayson is in a room."  I knew the significance of
this in this small hospital.  What she wasn't saying was that most
emergence patients are situated in cubicles or even in the hallway, and
if they're lucky, with a curtain drawn for privacy.  My husband was
someone special!  She continued, "Your son may be seated outside the
room."

She led us to the room where Ryan was.  There were still emergency
personnel monitoring him and the machines he was hooked up to.  I pulled
on the uniform and walked to his bed.  His eyes were closed.  I touched
his hand.  He opened his eyes.

His eyes tried to focus and then he stared blankly.  "I thought it would
be easier -- on me -- on you -- on the kids."  He said, numbly.  One of
the attendants scooted a chair behind me.  I sat, my face very near his.

"You're so wrong, Ryan!  Not only would it be harder without you, you
are needed -- by all of us."  I whispered.

He then, obviously with some amount of effort, did focus on my face.
"It won't happen again -- I promise.  I don't know why I ever doubted
your love for me -- any of you!  Damn, I'm tired!"

"I'm Dr. Goodman.  Mr. Crayson cannot be allowed to go to sleep for the
next 12 hours or so." Said the man in grey scrubs next to me.  "We will
be remotely monitoring his vital signs and blood gases for that time, and
if they remain at appropriate levels, you may take him home.  I suggest
that he not be left alone for awhile."

Ryan said, "But I have meetings -- tomorrow and - "

I gave him "the look".

"I can take Ryan with me."  I looked at the doctor.

"I see no problem with that.  And he tells me that you will be taking
him to California next week.  That may be the best thing!  The warm
beaches and cool redwood groves would be good for him.  Will it be just
the two of you -- or will you be taking the kids,  Ryan?"

So the doctor knows Ryan!

"I -- we -- hadn't thought about that possibility."  Said Ryan.  "Do
you think - - ?" Ryan said to me, with a hopeful look.

"Rye!"  I said, opening the door.  Rye immediately was in the room.
"Do you think you'd like to go to California with us next week?  You
and Ranee?"

"Rae-rae starts school Monday," said Rye, "but she's such an over
achiever, she should be able to do it."  Said Rye.  Ryan has been
calling his sister `Rae-rae' since he was able to utter her name as a
toddler.

"Oh!"  Said Ryan, more animated than he'd been since coming in.  "I
was supposed to go surfing at Kennebunkport with Luke on Tuesday!"

"When are you  going to California?"  Asked the Doctor.

"Dunno yet."  Said Ryan.  "As soon as my -- er -- my -- er - "

I could tell he was having a real problem saying "my psychologist!"  I
rescued him.  "My cousin's a psychologist.  He's referring us to a
doctor he knows out in Monterrey."  I got a grateful look from Ryan.

"Well, I see no problem with you going surfing -- unless there is some
other physical problem I am not aware of."  Said Dr. Goodman.

Ryan looked down at his crotch and back up, then looked at Rye, standing
there wide eyed.  I motioned with my head for Rye to go outside the
room.   He did so.

"Ryan was injured a few weeks ago - " I started, speaking un hushed
tones.  Ryan could hear.

"I am aware of his recent injuries."

"Did you know that there is possibly permanent damage to his groin?"

"No, I wasn't!  What happened, Ryan?  Can I take a look?"

Dr. Goodman closed the door and pulled the light blanket back from Ryan
and pulled down his underwear.  "Shit!"  Said the doctor, when he saw
Ryan's penis.  "They did a number on you didn't they?"

"He!"  cried Ryan.  "It was a damned doctor -- or that's what they
called him.  He was a butcher!  What they didn't do to me with their
kicking, he did with his scalpel."

"What -- I mean -- er -- do you have any sensation left?"

"That's not the problem, Jan."  Said Ryan.

"They kicked his groin severely and repeatedly."  I said.  "Ryan seems
to be having a loss of testosterone."

"Good God, Ryan!  Have you seen a urologist?"

I squeezed the doctors wrist very hard.  "My cousin has referred us to a
psychiatrist." I said, frowning so that Ryan could not see.

"Oh!"  Said Dr. Goodman.  "Th -- that should work."  He hesitated
then said, I think that that's enough for now.  And -- is it Jack?"

"Yes."

"Jack, I'm Jan.  It's nice to meet you after all this time.  Ryan and
I go way back.  Anyway, I need for you to sign a few papers, if you'll
follow me.  Maybe your son -- is it your son?"

"Rye's both our Son!"  Said Ryan.

"Well, maybe Rye can come in and make sure that Ryan doesn't fall
asleep for a few minutes, while we get you to sign some releases."

"What releases?" Ryan said groggily.

"Nothing, really, just technical stuff that needs to be done."  And Jan
pulled me out of the room.

"Rye, go keep your Pop awake!"  I said.

As soon as we were out of earshot, Jan said, "I think he needs to see a
urologist, too, but -- if -- who is your cousin?"

"Seth Gary."

"I wondered.  If he wants Ryan to see a shrink, I trust he needs it, but
a urologist has the expertise to know what doses to give -- assuming he
needs artificial testosterone meds."

"Oh!  Well, do you want to talk to Seth?"  I said.

"Oh, I WILL talk to him.  I am guessing he has something in mind already
though."  Said the doc.

I pushed speed dial for Seth.

"Hi Jack!"  Came Seth's usual cheery voice.  "Um -- Harold says you
are back at the hospital."

"Yeah."

"I hoped nothing like this would happen.  I'm afraid I judged that it
would not.  I'm sorry!"

"Seth -- it's not your fault.  Dr. Goodman wants to talk to you."

"Dr. who?"

"Seth?  Jan Goodman here."

"Jan -- Jan -- OH!  THAT Jan!  Yes! You volunteer here at the center
sometimes."

"Yes.  Ryan Crayson and I both graduated from Yale together."

"Oh!  You gay?"

"Haha!  Nope, sorry!  Straight as an arrow!  But anyway, I am seeing
Ryan for -- do you know what happened?"

"Yes."

"I think he needs to be under the care of a urologist -- besides the
psychiatrist you have referred him to.  But I don't want to upset any
apple cart."

"Yeah, that's okay.  And Doc Underwood specializes in these cases.  He
works closely with a urologist."

"I figured you had things covered.  I am much impressed with your
work."

"Thanks.  Is my cousin still there?"

"Yes."

"Seth?"

"Jack -- don't leave Ryan alone for anything -- after this -- no matter
how much he raves about this never happening again."

"He SAID that!"

"I know he did -- or figured it.  It's classic.  Do you know what his
schedule is like until Thursday?"

"He has clients to see tomorrow, and then Tuesday -- aren't you going
surfing with Ryan and Luke?"

"Oh yeah!  Is that Tuesday?  Wow!  Yeah, I said I'd go -- but only to
watch!"  Well, Thursday I have you guys a tentative appointment to see
Dr. Underwood.  Will that work?"

"You will have to tell Ryan.  He's scared shitless!"

"Ohh-kaaay!  Um -- how long will he be in the hospital?"

"For observation -- 12 hours.  After that time, if his blood gases and
vitals are okay, he can go home, but Dr. Goodman said he should not be
left alone."

"I concur -- totally.  But his blood gases and vitals are probably fine
now.  They want to observe him emotionally, actually.  He'll be coming
home before that time if they determine he can.  But as they said, he
cannot be left alone -- at all."

"We're handling it."  I said.

"In the mean time, Luke and I will pay him a visit there.  What room are
you in?"

"It's -- well, I think it's the only room in the emergency - "

"I know it exactly.  We'll be right there!"  He hung up.

Within minutes, Seth walked up, trailing a smiling Luke behind.  "Maybe
you should make yourself scarce, Cuz!"  Seth told me.  Rye was still
entertaining Ryan in the room.   Seth listened a moment.  "He's
good!"  Said Seth.  Maybe you should take him with you to - "

"We've already thought of it!"

"And I have another idea.  Ryan will need at least two meetings with
Underwood.  And there needs to be several days between.  Luke, how would
you like to do some surfing at Santa Barbara -- just for old times!"
Luke's eyes lit up.

"I can't go,"  added Seth, "but I think it would be good for Ryan to
do some surfing out there.  The surf at Kennebunkport isn't very high
right now, and the elation of surfing some large waves might give Ryan
some much needed endorphins.  And Luke could make sure he doesn't over
do it."  Luke smirked.

"Several days?  I'm not sure I can be gone that long!"  I said.

"If Ryan can -- and if he needs it -- I think I can put a bug up your
boss's ass!"  Seth joked.



The surfing at Kennebunkport was scrapped with the plans to surf in
California.  We arrived in Santa Barbara the next Monday afternoon.

"But Pop!  Rae-rae and I want to go meet Dad's friend."  Said Rye,
when his father told him he should explore the city -- not go with me to
see Jim.

I know what Ryan was thinking.  He truly didn't want me to be influenced
by my kids being there.  His self esteem was so bad that he felt, if I
"needed" to cheat --  who better with than an old flame?

"I WANT them to go with me, Ryan."  I said.  I'm proud of my -- OUR
--  kids!  And -- YOU're gonna meet him too!

Ryan folded his arms, set his jaw and said, "I don't think that would
serve any good purpose."

"Except that I'm also proud of you!"

"So you just want to rub your success in your friend's face?"  He
said.  That stopped me.  Damn if that wasn't part of it!  "Just go see
him.  You can let him know we are here too.  He'll let you know if he
wants to meet -- us."

"M-maybe you're right."  I said.

Truth be known, I really didn't know how I'd react. I hadn't seen Jim
in probably 15 years.  I was a little scared after being warned by Seth.
And -- if HE'S that careful -- maybe I should be - - too!

We stayed at the Normandy Inn, since it was the only place I knew.  In
sixteen years, it was looking a bit worn.  I knew exactly where Jim's
house was, since we went there for dinner all those years ago.  I
walked.  When Jim opened the door, I thought he was going to cry -- but
he didn't.  Very subdued, he said, "Jack -- you haven't changed!"

That was of course an exaggeration.  But -- sadly -- Jim had changed -- a
lot!  He was still very thin -- but the skin seemed to hang on his arms
and face.  He said, "Do come in."

I spread my hands out and said, "Don't I get a hug after all these
years?"  He stepped closer and we embraced.  He used to be so warm and
soft.  Not he was cold and hard.

"It's not exactly like it used to be, is it?"  He said.  Well, it is
for me.  You truly seem like the same Jack I knew -- how long ago?  25
years?"

"Fifteen, but who's counting?"  I said.

"Obviously, I am."  He said.  "My cousin is now in North Hollywood.
He hooked up with that new boy-star, Will Wacker."

"Who's that?"  I said.

"Teen idol.  But he likes -- older men."

"How old is he?" I asked, despite my disgust.

"A lot older than he looks on screen.  I think he's 25, actually."

"Oh!"  I said.  "That's not so bad!"

"That's right -- you married an older dude, didn't you?"

"Well -- not that much older, but -- yeah.  I guess some guys like older
and some - "

"George doesn't care -- as long as they have lots of money."

"How are YOU doing, Jim?"

"I get by.  Luckily I put a million into a managed investment plan that
pays well.  I let George go through 23 million dollars -- sold off all
the antique cars, even.  When I wouldn't let him touch the invested
million -- or the house -- his was gone before two years were up -- he
left me for an older guy who was looser with his money."

"Geez!"  I said.

"Problem was, this old fucker was living on plastic!  He showed George a
great time until he ran out of credit.  So George lost him and found
another guy even older.  I can't believe how he -- well YOU know how he
can sweet-talk his way into your heart!"

"Sounds like he's never left yours."

"Huh?"

"Your heart!  You still hold him there, don't you?"

Jim smiled sadly.  "Yeah.  I know its foolish, but -- I keep waiting for
him to come back."

"Oohhh Jim!"  I said, appalled.

"I never loved anyone else.  Sorry, Pal!"  Said Jim.

"No -- it's okay.  I've got my guy now -- for at least -- well, - the
reason I'm here is he was badly hurt -- both physically and emotionally
-- awhile back.  He's here to see a specialist in his type of
physio-psycho problem.  I'm here to support him.  Our kids are here
too."

"Really?  Why don't you all come over for dinner?"  He perked up for
the first time.  "I'd love to meet the lucky family that inherited Jack
Smith!"

"I'll ask Ryan if that would be okay with him."

"Jack - - ?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you a favor?"

"You can always ask!"

"Your standard comeback -- I remember!  Anyway -- would it be okay to
invite George -- when you come?"

"I'd be -- um -- curious -- to see him, but why would you?"

He smiled again -- sheepishly.  "Oh, I'd normally have no reason to ask
him, but with you here - - it's an excuse!"  He looked pathetic.  I
almost wanted to cry!

"But -- if he's in North Hollywood -- how - ?"

"He's up here at Pebble Beach, playing a celebrity golf round -- with
his Willy."

"Omigosh!  His Willy!  That's funny!  Omigosh again!  That would make
him `Willy Wacker'!  That had to be on purpose!"  I LAUGHED.  Um --
how did you know he'd be here?"

"He's still my cousin.  He somehow wrangled an invitation for Uncle
George to the game too, so I heard about this from my mom.  But - - we
still keep in contact - occasionally.

"Do you think he'd be bringing this Willy Wanker to dinner too?"

"Wacker!"  he said smiling blandly.  "I doubt it.  George likes to
keep his personal life separate from his family life.  I dunno how that
will work with his dad in the tournament."

"I'd almost like to see how that would play out.  I know -- or thought
I did -- how George's parents felt about his gayness."  I said.  "But
-- I'm afraid that Ryan would hate it!  He stays out of the bright
lights as much as possible."

"Yeah -- me too."  Said Jim.  "And you're probably right to be
concerned.  Will comes with an entourage -- AND paparazzi."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah!  George has made it into that Star, the supermarket  rumor
sheet once or twice.  But mostly it's British paparazzi.  Will is a
Brit."

"If he's a teen idol, don't they have to kind of keep their sexuality
under wraps?"

"Yes, but you know there are always rumors -- that Will's "aging
companion" is more than just a platonic friendship."

"George must really like sex with a teen to put up with that!"  I said.

"Sex?  Not!  George says the kid is a lush and a fish in bed."

"What?!"  I said.

"You know what George is in love with!" Said Jim, sadly.  "He's
addicted to money.  He'll do anything for it."

"I know, but - "

"I think you're gonna be surprised how he looks!"  Said Jim.

"Looks?"  I said.

"Jack -- he doesn't look much different from when you knew him -- well,
except maybe better.  He's had surgery -- lifts and tucks -- and -- he
works out all the time to keep himself looking fit.  He looks like --
well, maybe 25 -- at the oldest!  And he's no longer stocky!"

"Geez!  Well, good for him.  I think a guy should always look his
best."  I said.

"Even if it takes surgery?"

"It wouldn't be my choice, but -- I'm not gonna judge him for that.
Lots of people do it."

"So it sounds like maybe your curiosity is piqued?"

"Definitely!  When -- shall we plan to come for dinner?"

"Let me call George and find out if he's even available.   How long
will you be here?"

"Maybe as long as two weeks."

"Good.  George will be going back by Sunday, is my guess, since the
tournament is over then."


"Saturday, Luke -- do you remember the little purple eyed partner of my
cousin Seth? -- well he's flying out to surf with Ryan."

"Where are they surfing?"

"I dunno.  Down south somewhere, I think.  Zuma Beach?"

"Well, thanks for coming by, Jack.  And by the way -- YOU look amazing,
too!"

"Thanks.  I can't claim any credit for it.  I think that love -- for
Ryan and the kids -- helps."  I was immediately ashamed of myself!  I
thought about ryans comment to me earlier about wanting to flaunt.

"I'll call you."

"Great!"  I said.

We hugged again.  This time it was a bit warmer.

"How was it?"  Said Ryan, when I got back.

"It was -- sad at first.  But it was nice once the initial shock wore
off."

"Sad?  Shock?"

"He looks so old!"

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?  We don't exactly look like
teens any more."

"No, Ryan -- I mean OLD!  Anyway -- he wants us all to come for dinner
this weekend."

"I'll be down at Venice Beach on Saturday."  He reminded me.

"Oh -- Venice, huh?"

"Yes.  You don't have to come if you - "

"I wouldn't miss it for anything!"  I averred.  "I'll have fun with
the kids -- on the beach."

"Well -- um -- that's one reason I chose Venice beach.  I checked the
web, and there won't be huge waves anywhere this weekend -- so I'm
gonna teach the kids how to surf."

"Really?  How great!  Maybe I will change my mind, after all!"

"And - - spend some more time with Jim?"

"Huh?"  I said.

"You said you might change your mind about going -- didn't you?"

"I was going to go as an observer, Sweetheart.  But -- if the kids are
gonna surf -- and if the surf's not that wild -- maybe this will be a
good time to learn to surf!"

"You want to surf with me?!!"  Ryan asked, clearly excited for the
first time in a long time.

Notes:  Lotsa stuff happening.  No clear direction.  I'm in author
heaven!  I can go almost anywhere with this!  Any comments are always
welcome.  I don't take suggestion well - - - unless its REALLY REALLY
good! Hahahahaha!  stevethomas@hotmail.com.  Thanks and ... love, Steve