Date: Tue, 18 Apr 2000 15:00:45 PDT
From: Eric Mann <manneric@hotmail.com>
Subject: My Life So Far 1, gay college

Note: This story is entirely fiction, in a parallel world, please forgive
my grammar but English is not my first language. This is my first attempt
to post a story, as always the usual warning, if you're not suppose to be
reading this, be careful and don't get caught.  For all of those straight
and curious people out there, a person with bad luck is not the one who's
gay, but the one that doesn't find love.

My Life So Far

Let's star for who I am, my name is Jonathan, well I'm right now 19 years
old almost 20, I have light brown hair and eyes, which I've been told
they're beatiful, I'm white, and almost 6 foot tall, well maybe shorter,
anyway, the story begins back when I just turned 18, High School was over,
and I was going to study a major in International Commerce, here at home.
(because I'm a lucky person who lives on a city with one of the best
Universities of the country)

Well my life at High School was great, I mean I had some friends, which
supported me, of course they didn't knew that I was gay, but they always
suspected that I was, because they were always making jokes about me being
gay, which was one of the many reasons that made me to not like the fact of
being gay, I didn't want it to show them that they were right all the time.

But anyway I started college, and I wasn't pretty sure of my sexuality sure
I liked girls, but none of the girls I had met so far, seems to fill me,
don't get me wrong I never have a girlfriend before, I was always looking
for a long term relationship, and the friends that I had weren't good
enough to make me they're boyfriend, and guys well, I sure like them too,
but in a diferent way, I just wanted to know, how big they were (you know
what I mean), and well my fantasies back at High School, just were of
looking at any of my friends jacking off, and see their arm pits, and if
they had hairy legs. But I still think about falling in love of a girl, I
mean I hadn't met a man that I like so mucho to fall in love for him, so I
thought that was a good signal, I wasn't gay, this was surely just a stage.

The first thing I notice when I entered to college was, that they were more
cute, hansome, and sexy guys on my classes, than girls, after a while I
started to get worried, and by first time I entered a gay mIRC channel, I
started to make some friends there, who were helping me found myself, but I
was getting tired of always meet absolutely great persons from places far
away from home, so I decided to enter a local gay chat room, and after a
month of chatting with guys I finally got the courage to invite one of them
to meet in person, I was really nervous he was a 24 year old guy that
studied at the same college, and well in his description he looked good, I
mean he said, he had dark blond hair, white, blue eyes, a little bit hairy
(which I didn't like that point), so what the hell I went to our "date".

I was wearing my favorite shirt, and I spend more time in front of the
mirror than usual, and here I was waiting to this guy to show up, I was
reading some magazzines, I told him how I was going to be dressed so it
shouldn't be a problem to find me, then I felt an arm on my shoulder and I
turned to look and here it was the guy, not so cute, not so hansome, and he
surely wasn't sexy,

"Hi" he told me giving me a hand shake

"Hi you must be... I'm sorry what was your name again" I answered trying to
not look to dissapointed

"Jordan" he said giving me a strange look

"Oh Jordan, I remember" I said again trying to give my most beautiful
smile.

"You're dissapointed right?" he asked me a little bit concern and sad

"No, not at all" I lied, I have to admit that some times I just can't be an
actor

So anyway, we eated together I discovered that we have some mutual
interest, like movies, and the perception of life, and politics (hey! we
didn't talk just about bulshit, we have brain), so he was from another
city, so he lived in an apartment just by himself, and well to be honest, I
wanted to know right now if I was gay or not, so I accepted his invitation
to go to his apartment, we where there, he turned on his computer, and
showed me some of his favorites por photos, well most of them were really
disgusting, I was more concern about how he could lived in such a small
apartment, it was just one flat room, in which he have the door, his bed, a
little friedge, a desk, his closet, and of course the bathroom, but then,
he started to touch me, and bring me back to reality, I didn't do anything
to stop him, I said to myself well let's have sex, if I like it I'm gay, if
I don't well I don't have to worry about my sexuality anymore.

So I was there lying on his bed with my shirt just above my nipples and
with my pants just below my knees, and this guy was sucking my cock really
hard, and what I was feeling...nothing, I was just there worried, I was so
nervous I really wanted to pee, not to cum, I was telling to myself how
stupid I was, how I could be doing these to myself, and the guy turned to
look at me and saw, that I wasn't really exited, so he jacked off, and
cumed on my chest, he jerked me off, but it really hurted me, he was
jacking me so hard that it was painful, and I just lost my erection, and he
got the point, we brought a towel and cleaned me, and himself, then we got
dressed and I leave his apartment, he gave me his phone number, I he said
that I should keep in contact, of course I never talked to him again, but
that doesn't meand I didn't saw him again, because next day, I just bumpted
to him on every place at University and I was getting piss that he was
following me.

To be continued....

Well thats all of the first installment, this would be a series of I don't
know how many installments, but please feel free to write to
manneric@hotmail.com and tell me what you think about it.