Date: Wed, 10 Jan 2007 19:31:02 -0600
From: Luis Salazar <subfer1@gmail.com>
Subject: nate's wounded heart

Disclaimer:
The following story contains sexual material between consensual adults.
If you are offended by homosexuality or know you shouldn't be reading
this according to your local laws, then please don't. Comments are
welcomed at: subfer1@gmail.com I hope everyone likes it and I will have a
new one up soon.


      Chapter 3. ----A killer silence----

      He was staring out the window, there was a pretty blue bird standing
on top of a light post outside the building. The bird sang and shook it's
wings, then it started checking them with it's beak. He could hear the
shower on, Nate was already up and avoiding him. It seemed that this had
turned out to be their normal routine ever since 2 nights before when he
had brought Becca over and Nate had exploded in anger. "You two know each
other... What twisted game have you been playing on me?" Nate had yelled at
Luke. He didn't know what to do, for the first time since they had met, he
had found himself at a lack of words to answer to Nate. Then he had just
gotten up and left the room. He looked at Becca, and just as he was about
to ask her what the hell was going on, she raised her hand asking him to be
quiet. "I have to go I'm sorry Luke, I'll explain later..." And with that
she left as well.

      He heard the shower stop. He didn't know if Nate would stay and
change in the bathroom or if he'd come out and dress in front of his
closet, after all this was the first time that he had woken up this early
to try and see if he could get any word out of Nate, he couldn't stand the
way in which he would just ignore him. The little devil was so incredibly
good at ignoring him that it made him frightened, no one had ever treated
him with such coldness and indifference.

      The door opened. He swiftly got under the covers and remained
silent. He heard Nate's feet padding on the carpeted floor, and stop at
Luke's right, he guessed in front of his own closet on the left side of the
room. He heard a thud on the floor. The towel was his best guess. He
quietly turned and looked to the other side of the room to see a naked Nate
standing over there. His heart beat quickened. Nate had a nice ass, not too
toned, not too skinny. It was actually beefy, for as cheap as the adjective
sounds, it was Luke's best choice of words for it. It was round and firm,
and covered in a dusting of short brown hairs. He swallowed, feeling a lump
forming on his throat, as well as the boner that was struggling to come out
the leg of his boxers.

      His back was broad and seemed as if Nate had done some work to get it
toned. His legs and arms had nice muscles too. Nate turned and squatted to
open the last drawer on the built in closet. As he was now in a sort of
squatting position, Luke could see the frontal muscles of his thighs which
were hard and easy to notice. But the site that actually caught his eye was
of Nate's stomach and chest from his side. He had a trail of hair that went
up to his navel and it seemed like he had a bit of fat on his lower
stomach, yet his stomach looked flat and his chest looked the same, not too
toned, but it was enough to make Luke wish he could get up and run his
tongue all over it. Nate turned and put on some boxers he took out from the
drawer.

      All of this was done very quietly, which explained how Luke had never
woken up while Nate dressed until today. When he stood up Luke saw him in
his full beauty. He did seem to have a tiny roll in his lower stomach, he
guessed that Nate used to be chubby, but now he looked really hot. His
chest could use some work he though, but just like his stomach it looked
hard. And now he could see that Nate had some slight dark chest hair, not
too much, a dusting, just like the one he had on his ass cheeks. It
surrounded his nipples and covered the center of his chest in a sort of
arrow form that pointed up from it. But what really made Luke want to reach
out and touch him was Nate's cock. He had a thick cut cock, and it was
soft, though it looked thick anyways, with a dark patch of hair right above
it. And in a matter of seconds the boxers were on.

      Nate turned once again to his closet, and not being able to stand the
situation anymore, Luke turned to face the wall, pulled the blanket to
cover most of his face, just above his nose, and decided to try and see if
he could get Nate to say anything. He could still hear him moving and going
through his clothes. "Good morning." He said. The sounds coming from Nate's
closet were suddenly silenced. He could feel the lump on his throat become
even bigger. After a few seconds he still had received no answer. Then he
heard movement once again. He wasn't sure if he should look towards Nate or
not, if he was watching and thought he wanted to peek that wouldn't make
him any more civil. He heard a zipper being pulled up. And then he heard
him move a few steps, and then he froze, Nate sat at the lower edge of
Luke's bed, not far from Luke's feet.

      Though there had been no words coming out of Nate's mouth yet. He
looked down and saw Nate leaning forward, tying his tennis shoes. He was
wearing a red t-shirt, some jeans, and looked freshly shaved. Luke could
catch the scent of Nate's aftershave. Nate looked his way and he thought he
would pee his pants. The coldness of his stare was unbelievable, yet he
said nothing to him and showed absolutely no emotion while he looked
straight into Luke's eyes. He got up and took a notebook which he placed
inside his backpack, and carrying the back pack on his right hand, he
started towards the door. Then at the door he stopped, for a moment it
seemed as if he was about to look back. "Morning." He said, and then left.

      Luke sighed and reached down to cup his hard on. He was still rock
hard and felt a wet spot close to the waist band of his boxers. He reached
in rubbed the tip of his cock noticing how sensitive it already was. He
took his dick out, pushing his boxers below his knees and kicked the
blanket off of him. He looked down and saw his dick pointing up in all of
its 8". He began to jerk off slowly reviewing in his mind the hairs on
Nate's ass, the hair on his chest, his toned legs and the way his stomach
and chest looked. He licked his lips wishing he could suck on Nate's
cock. He then looked down upon his naked self and pushed his boxers all the
way down. Then he spread his legs and pictured Nate looking up to him from
his crotch. He imagined Nate was starting to play with his hole by using
his finger, rubbing against it and starting to gently go inside him. Then
he imagined Nate putting out his tongue while still looking up at him as he
licked Luke's ass.

      He could feel his orgasm was approaching. Then he imagined Nate was
on his knees holding that thick cock. He imagined it had to be about 6 or 6
and a half inches while hard. He imagined Nate put the tip of his cock
pressing against his hole and going in. At this thought he lost it and
started to shoot. The first shot went all the way up and hit him in his
chin, the second one hit his neck and the last few shots landed on his
chest and belly. He took a few ragged breaths, ran a hand through his cum
that was lying all over his torso and then rubbed the tip of his cock with
his thumb; he twitched from the sensibility and then sighed. "Now, I have
to figure out what the fuck is wrong here if I ever want all of that to
actually happen..." He said while looking up to the ceiling with his chest
and face glistening in sweat.

      * * * * *

      The movie that they were watching was as boring as listening to her
teacher. Film appreciation was an art elective which she thought would be
nice to take. But now she regretted it with all of her soul. It was the
only class she had on Fridays a late morning class, and through out the
whole movie she had been wondering to her past and to the events that had
taken place in the last few days. When she came to college she thought she
would get away from all of the things that happened the last few months of
her senior year in high school, but she also felt a great deal of regret
and pain, Nate had been the very best friend she had ever had, and she
thought that by going away she was confirming that their friendship had
died. But then she had seen Nate in the dining hall, and for those awkward
seconds, she hoped they could fix things, but now she wasn't so sure.
      And then, as soon as she saw Luke sitting a few seats in front of her
in class, she thought the guy looked a whole lot like Derek. But when she
went into Luke's room and saw Nate sitting on the bed she thought this had
to be some fucked up coincidence. Although, she was sure that poor Luke had
no clue of all of the shit that Nate had gone through because of Derek, and
it was also obvious to her that Nate had noticed the physical resemblance
between Luke and Derek and through that, he had assumed that he and Becca
were trying to play some twisted mind game on him.

       She couldn't blame him. From the time when they were 10 and she
moved to the Austin, they had been best friends. She had never for one
moment cared about him being chubby. In fact she remembered that when she
was 13 she had a crush on him. Reading through magazines that referred to
the importance of a girl's first kiss, she always had imagined that Nate
would give it to her. Though she never dared to make a move, and she always
secretly wished he would make an advance on her. But by the time she turned
15 she had already started to realize that nothing would ever come to pass
between the two of them.

      In reality she had started to think that maybe Nate was different
from other boys. She had heard rumors around town, Austin was fairly more
liberal then the rest of Texas and she was sure that she had heard people
talk about the gays in town. She always had a hunch about Nate; she
suspected that her friend liked boys and not girls. But still neither one
ever said anything about it. And now she thought that the silence that the
two of them had kept about this subject; had been what eventually killed
their friendship. Something she wished hadn't really died, and something
she thought she would regret until the day she died.

      Suddenly she realized that the film was over. A few of her classmates
seemed to be waking up. There were several yawns through out the whole
class, while their teacher, a short white haired man that looked like
Einstein after doing drugs and not shaving for a few days, was now asking
them their opinion about the movie. Very few people ventured to answer. "It
was... interesting..." Was the answer that a nerdy looking guy that was
pushing his glasses up on his nose replied, as if he thought that someone
should say something seeming that no one knew what to say. Mainly because
it was a little bit easy to notice that most of the class hat actually
dozed off during the movie. The teacher looked around the class as if
expecting someone else to share an opinion. But there was no such luck. He
gave them brief instructions on what they would have to write as a report
on the movie they had just seen, and then wished his students a
"productive" weekend and they all started to leave before he even said they
could go.

      She was hungry and had no cash with her. The idea of going to her
dorm to go get some money was as appealing as the one of having to eat at
the dinning hall. So she opted for taking the shorter walk to the dinning
hall. And as she was finishing the line, she spotted Luke sitting on a
table; he seemed to be barely beginning to eat. She took a deep breath and
thought that perhaps there was very little she could do to change her
present relationship with Nate. But maybe it wasn't too late to do
something about Luke and Nate.

      She put her tray down and Luke immediately looked up. A shy smile
came upon his face when he saw her. No, not shy, sad. She sat down. She
tried to say something, but so did Luke. She chuckled. "You go first." He
told her. She looked into his eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry for
leaving like that on Tuesday. I don't really think you know this,
but... Nate and I were high school classmates. And this last year a lot of
things happened to the two of us. Well mostly to him." Luke nodded. He kept
playing with his food and motioned with his hand for her to go on, before
putting a forkful of salad in his mouth. "I don't really think I am in any
right of telling about what happened to him, but I can tell you why I think
he got angry at you." At this point she realized she had just earned Luke's
full attention.

      "There was this guy who was actually the cause of all of the things
that happened to Nate. And to be honest with you, people would say you guys
are brothers." Luke stopped chewing and looked straight into her eyes. "And
I'm not kidding" She added. "I bet that is why he spat all those things at
you on Tuesday night, he doesn't know we've barely met Luke, and I'm sorry
because I'm sure that by seeing you with me he probably thought we were
pulling some weird shit on him... I mean he has no clue... that you have no
clue." Luke took a deep breath and looked down.

      "That actually explains a lot. Since the first day I've noticed that
he looks at me as if he had to steer clear of me." He told her before
taking a swig of his ginger ale. "I'm sorry; I guess you ended up caught in
the middle of our issues." She told him, trying somehow to make him feel
better. She felt horrible; she hadn't thought that she would actually feel
this bad. "I can't believe how easy it is for him to ignore me... since
that night it's just like I was erased from the room, until this morning
when he pretty much looked at me with the iciest glare anyone has given me
in my life."  His voice began to break in the last words. And that was when
she realized. Luke was gay. But he didn't know... And he has a crush on
Nate, or at least he is attracted to him.

      "Don't worry, I will talk to him, I don't care if I have to face my
fears and if I have to admit how much of an idiot I was to him, I promise
you I will make it clear to him that you don't have anything to do with any
of that old shit. I know that he and I most likely never get to be on good
terms again, but it's not fair that he shuts you out because of me." She
said. Luke stared into her eyes and smiled, his eyes were teary. "Well I
wouldn't be so sure about that thing of the two of you never going back to
good terms. Any other person would've simply stopped talking to me being in
the situation you are with him. But you didn't and that to me means that
you are a great person, and if he can't see that then honey, he's an
idiot." She felt like she was about to cry, she reached across the table
and took hold of his hand. "Thanks."

      * * * * *

      He had no classes that day, but he had to work at the library, the
whole day he had been arranging books, in the lovely company of
Ms. Hepburn. The gracious and sweet lady; that he had met before, and who
had warned him of that he ought to learn quickly how to arrange the books
following the system that she kept with so much effort. After a few hours
of feeling like a small cat in the company of an oversized rottweiller, he
had tried his luck at flattering her in a futile attempt of getting on her
good side. "Mrs. Hepburn, that name of yours, are you somehow related to
that beautiful actress of the early decades of the twentieth century?" For
a second there, she had grinned and batted her eye lashes in a manner that
came across to Nate as both flirtatious and nauseating. "Oh no my dear, and
by the way, I am no Mrs. I am single, and it seems like you didn't pay much
attention, not even when we were introduced." She banged a book into a case
and he retreated a few steps, still smiling, trying not to show his
fear. Damn is that lady scary.

      Now he was at least glad that he could go back to the room and get a
rest. Although now that he was going up the stairs, he remembered that he
had no clue whether Luke was going to be there or not. He stopped to ponder
about his for a few seconds. Then he just decided that he would leave to
read somewhere if Luke was there. After a few minutes he entered the room,
slowly walking, he checked the bathroom and saw there was no one
there. Then he walked down the hallway and found that Luke wasn't there
either. He jumped on his bed falling on his stomach and sighed. He wanted
to rest but he wasn't all that tired. Maybe some reading would help him. He
got up, took off his shoes and went to his closet where he kept his school
books and items on the top drawer. The closets were divided in two
sections, the top part, that went from the ceiling to the middle of the
wall consisted in a hanger section, and the lower part was a chest of
drawers that had 4 drawers that went down to the floor.

      He decided to get some reading done for his classical literature
class and he took his copy of "Great Expectations" by Charles Dickens, he
had already read it and found out that it would be the first book that they
would cover for the class. He went to bed and read for about and hour
before he noticed he was actually very tired now. So he put the book on top
of his desk, which held very little things, if you'd compare it to Luke's
which had his laptop and a small printer on top of it. Nate's barely had a
few books and notebooks on top of it, most of which had been borrowed from
the library and he would have to return before the semester ended.

      The books he had on the first drawer on the closet were books he had
brought from Austin and which he read for pleasure. Now he got on bed and
laid his head on the pillow, forgetting about how much he wanted to avoid
Luke, ever since he had discovered him and Becca were friends. He wasn't
sure what to think, he actually felt stupid about how he had acted, but he
wasn't in much hurry to talk about it, because he knew it would probably
end up turning into talking about the past, talking about Derek. He fell
asleep, and had a good sleep for a few hours.

      * * * * *

      Luke and Becca got into the room, and as they got to the middle of
the hallway they saw Nate lying on the bed. Becca, motioned with her hand
for Luke to follow her out. They got out of the room, and quietly closed
the door. "Ok so, let me do the talking, you go somewhere, and I'll tell
you how it goes later on." Luke thought about it for a few seconds. "How
will you tell me? Do I go up to your room or what?" She thought about it
and came up with an option. "Do you use a messenger? Microsoft?" Luke
nodded. She opened her bag and took out a notebook and a pen. She wrote
down her address for him, and handed him the torn off piece of paper. "Ok
so go somewhere, and I'll knock, I bet he will get a surprise..." She took
a deep breath and looked at the door and back to him. "It will be ok, from
what you tell me you guys were really close and even though he can be cold
I don't think he will be that cold." He told her trying to show some
support. She nodded, turned back and knocked the door. Luke patted her back
and ran to the stairs.

      * * * * *

      Something woke him up. A sound, he didn't know what. Then he thought
he heard some knocking, he opened his eyes and looked around. Then there
was some more knocking again, a louder knocking then before. "Ok, ok I'm
going." He reached the door and opened it. Then he felt his whole body
stiffen as he saw Becca standing there smiling. He didn't know what to
say. "Luke isn't here." He said, at a lack of anything good to say. He was
about to close the door when she put her hand on the door and finally spoke
up "Actually I'm not here to see him, I'm sorry to drop by like this... I
know you probably don't want to talk to me, but I really think we should."
She said, while looking down to the floor. He looked down, took a deep
breath and opened the door, leaving room for her to walk in. "Come in." She
walked by his side and into the room, stopping and standing between the
beds.

      He reached his desk and stood in front of it, not knowing what to do
or say. They both stood there for a few minutes and looked at each other
and then around the room awkwardly. Nate pulled his desk chair out and sat
on it. "I guess you could sit on Luke's." She nodded and pulled the chair
from the parallel desk, and sat facing Nate. "Boy this is
awkward... Ok...uhm..." She took a deep breath and then looked up to Nate's
face. He looked down and then raised his head a little bit, he had a lump
on his throat, and it hurt to have her here, to be in the same room with
her. "I know that I am not exactly your favorite person, but please hear me
out. I know you have gone through some real horrible things this year, and
I just stood there and let it go by, which isn't exactly any better..."

      He felt like he was about to cry, he dropped his head and put his
hands on the sides of his face. He let out a long breath and then realized
that she had gone silent. Then he felt her hands on top of his. She pulled
his hands away from his face and he looked up at her. She was crying
too. "I'm so sorry..." She let out a sob. She got up and started walking
towards the door. He jumped up and reached her, embracing her and wrapping
her in his arms. She laid her head on his chest and he kissed the top of
his head. Now they were both crying.

      She took a deep breath and pulled away a little. "Luke has nothing to
do with any of it you know..." He wiped the tears from his eyes, and
stepped back. "I know... It's just that... he looks..." She jumped in. "A
lot like Derek? Yeah I noticed." He nodded. "Derek isn't here, and if he
ever comes I will kick his ass so hard he will cry for his mommy." He
chuckled at that, and looked at her face; she was wiping the tears away and
smiling at him. "He hurt me a lot..." He fought to keep the tears in. "I
know but Luke won't, he is a very good guy, I hadn't liked someone like I
like him since I met you." She caressed the side of his face. He took a
deep breath and reached to hug her again. They held each other tightly. "I
missed you so much Natey...I'm so sorry..." She started crying again, while
pressing her face against his chest. "I know you are Becky and I missed you
too." He said before kissing the top of her head again.