Date: Tue, 29 Oct 2002 08:48:10 -0500
From: deskgnomes@hotmail.com
Subject: Nowhere/Chapter 1

OK Standard warning.  If you ain't 18 years old or if it's
illegal to read material that involves two men involved with
each other you shouldn't continue.  But on a side note why
are you at Nifty in the first place.  Also if you looking
for a quick jerk off story you might want to grab a
different story.  OOK and on with the story


                           Nowhere

                         Chapter One



     "Hey Blake.." I sighed as I fell into a sofa.
     "Yeah" he replied as he collapsed
     "I REFUSED TO MOVE EVER AGAIN!" I moaned.
     "Yeah yeah whatever you better get rested `cause you
got a date with Brandon from Bio remember?  So get you ass
in gear and get ready."  said Blake.
     "I hate men!!!"  I whined as I stood up and started to
drag my ass to the shower.  I kept thinking about this whole
Brandon thing.  Yeah he's cute but like he has an IQ of 10.
He's what I like to call arm jewelry.  Pretty to have on
your arm but other than that pretty useless.  He's nice and
all but well he's a bit of a prick when he wants to be.  So
as I'm getting out of the shower I begin to look through my
closet for something comfortable.  I know I should be
looking for something that looks good but after spending a
day hauling shit up three flights of stairs I could have put
on a large garbage bag as long as it was comfortable.  And
if Brandon had a problem he could date Ms Rosy Palm.
     "Hey can I borrow this?"  Blake asked as he bounded
into my room holding a Lycra red shirt.  Shaking my head
"Yeah.  You know you don't walk anywhere you just kinda
bounce.  It like you're still a little kid." I replied
chuckling.  Blake stuck out his tongue and took off.  I
decided on a pair of jeans and a plain black shirt.  Nothing
fancy.  Just as I sat down waiting for Brandon to call Blake
began his patented disclaimer for not being home this
evening.
     "OK If I'm not home tonight don't worry ok.  It doesn't
mean I'm dead in a ditch or fucking someone's brains out.
It just means I had a good time.  Don't worry I've got my
phone on me.  I'm going on a blind date with Eric ...  Denny
knows him.  Anyways I'll fill you in on all the details
tomorrow bye"  Blake monologued.  The thing is to him its
one sentence and he doesn't need to breathe.  He also
doesn't need me to comment, just acknowledge that he has
begun the ritual.
     "Yeah OK be careful and wear a rubber." I reply without
looking up.  As Blake left, my phone rang and Brandon was
calling to let me know that he was going to be there in like
10 minutes so I better be ready.  I hung up on him.  Yeah I
know, what a bitchy thing to do, but I didn't need any
attitude this evening and if he were going to piss me off
he'd figure out that wouldn't be such a good idea.
     Ten minutes later began what Blake like to refer to as
the 13th Hour.  BANG BANG BANG.
     "Come on in" I said from the bathroom.  Sure enough my
comment was acknowledged with a slam from the front door.
Brandon came storming on in and came to a screeching halt
when he saw me.  "What are you wearing I told you to be
ready when I get here and you can't even dress yourself."
that was about as far as he got before I had already decided
the outcome of the evening.  "Oh I'm sorry I just need to
switch my clothes.  Two minutes tops OK sweetie.." I replied
batting my eyes like some kind of Southern Belle.  "yeah ok"
he muttered defeated.
     So I began to rummage through my closet finding the
most tattered nasty shirt I could find.  "Oh Brandon where
are we going tonight?" I hollered through the door.  "We're
going to the club."
"OK" I then quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed some
cornstarch and water.  Brandon was busy looking at the paper
so he didn't see me.  I mixed the two and dripped it all
over the shirt and put it on.  It was dry by the time he
started bitching again.  I grabbed my coat and put it on and
off we went.  The drive there was like a root canal.  The
difference was this wasn't necessary I just had nothing
better to do than teach Mr. Brandon some manners.
     Now for those of you who don't know what black light
does to certain stains, it illuminates them even after they
have been washed.   Look at people's jeans next time you go
to a club with a black light and you'll get a laugh.
Anyways starch water mimics the stain WONDERFULLY.  So
Brandon's face almost fell off when I checked in my coat.  I
smiled and made my way to the bar.  Some of the regulars
knew what I was doing and got a good laugh.  I heard one guy
whisper "I didn't know guy's could shoot that much..  I
wonder if he knows that his shirt is glowing."  I chuckled
grabbed my Long Island ice tea and went back to a scowling
Brandon.
     "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!!  YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS!
How dare you embarrass me like this" he hissed under his
breath.  I looked up very innocently and smiled "What?  Is
there something on my shirt?"  I left the table and went on
the dance floor.  After a couple of grinding sessions with
some random guy I felt Brandon behind me.  "You owe me big
tonight" he slurred out.  Oh great a drunk Brandon was not a
happy Brandon.  As we continued dancing he took off my shirt
and threw it away.  Now I was really pissed off.  So being a
calm rationally person I told him to fuck off and went to
get my coat.  He screamed at me "God its been two weeks and
we haven't fucked yet.  The whole reason for dating you was
to get laid.  I mean why else would someone date such a
heinous bitch."  So then I got my coat and his, got in my
car and left.  About half way home I saw a homeless man
wandering around on the main drag.  "Here take this and keep
warm.  Have a good night" as I lobbed the coat out the
window I took off.
     As I unlocked the door to my apartment I noticed that
the light was on.  Blake was sitting in a chair reading.  OH
this has to be an interesting story.  He smirked when he saw
I had no shirt.  "Came back to warm up?" he asked.
"Came back `cause Brandon's the biggest twat I've ever met.
You or me first?"  I asked.
"I'll go"  Blake replied.  He then told me of his blind date
who reminded him of Ben Stiller.  Not in the looks
department rather the monotonous prattle and "deep" quotes.
Apparently he was going for the dazzle him with BS approach.
One great thing that I love about Blake is that the boy
doesn't deal with BS and is as blunt as I am.  Well after
about what Blake said to be fifteen minutes that felt like four
hours he stood up mid dinner and said, "I'm sorry but this
just isn't working for me" and left.  By the time I was done
wiping my tears of laughter away he said "your turn".  He
got as good a laugh as I did.
     "You know that you are going to have to see him
tomorrow considering that you have a Bio test and he's in
your class?" Blake asked lifting one eyebrow.

     "Yeah Yeah whatever we'll see what happens whatever." I
mumbled as I left to get ready for bed.

     On my way to class I checked voicemail and there were
three voicemails from Brandon.  All three apologizing for
his behavior.  Now I know that what he did was wrong but I
think I was worse than he was, so my heart softened a
little.  I actually felt bad.  Now this is a rare thing.
Usually I give people whatever they give me.  I'm a great
friend or a horrible enemy.  So I was having warm happy
feelings when I saw him waiting outside of class the usual
half-hour early.
     "Hey" he said very boyishly kicking the ground.   I
mean how can I be angry at that?
     "Hey yourself I got you messages.  Thanks and sorry
about my behavior I was tired, but I shouldn't have done
that.  Sorry" I replied looking at the ground.
     "It's ok" Brandon replied as he gave me a hug.
     "Can we talk about it after the test?" I asked.
     "Sure thing."
     As I began to walk into the room he grabbed my shoulder
and he was still grinning.  Isn't that the cutest thing?  He
wants a kiss.
     "Hey babe I've got something to ask you before we go
in?"  He smiled.  Thinking to myself it's adorable he wants
a kiss.
     "Sure what?" I asked as if I didn't know.
     "Can I copy off your test?"  He asked with puppy eyes.
     Yeah that's right!  The jerk off asked me to let him
cheat.  The only reason why he was being nice was so he'd
pass the friggin course.  Oh Brandon now you'se in a heap of
trouble.
     "Sure but I want something before the test." I smiled
as if nothing was wrong.
     "Sure babe what?"  he replied
     "Head right now in the men's bathroom.  You're just too
cute.  I can't go to the test without a clear head and do
well.  So what do you say?" I asked with impishness about
me.
     "One condition.  I get some after you go.  Deal?" He
asked as if he was in control of this situation.
     "Sure sounds like fun."
     OK so we went into the bathroom and he went to town.
Thing is I was laughing the whole time because he wasn't
even any good at this.  Finally, and I do mean Finally, I
got done.  So he got all excited as I started to go down and
just as I got to the base I raked his stuff with my teeth,
stood up and left the bathroom with his pants down on the
ground writhing in pain.  I tucked in my shirt sat down and
started to take the test.  A couple of minute's later
Brandon came in and sat down next to me and the professor
handed him a different version of the test.  Now he was
really pissed off.  After the test I called his phone and
left him a message that he should never call me ever again
and if he sees me in the street not to even say hello.
     I was steaming when I got home from class and started
cooking.  Cooking seems to keep me calm for some reason.
Questions like why the hell did I ever go out with him? And
how could I have been so stupid?  Kept wandering around in
my head.  Later that night after the four-course meal, I
went to sleep dreaming of a life more normal.
OK so lets hear it.  Did you like it?  Hate it?  or all the
above.  Believe it or not writers do need feedback in order
to keep writing.  Email me at deskgnomes@hotmail.com