Date: Fri, 03 Nov 2000 09:40:17 EST
From: Josh Aterovis <aterovis@hotmail.com>
Subject: Reap the Whirlwind - Chapter 12

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Chapter 12

	When I left work that afternoon I headed straight to the police station. I
didn't know what to expect since I'd never been to the police station before
but I guess I had some sort of mental picture of a dark, dingy looking hole
in the wall straight out of NYPD Blue. It couldn't have been farther from
that. The police station was housed in a modern square brick building with
lots of tinted windows and not much character. I entered a lobby that looked
more like a doctor's waiting room and approached the glass window.

	"I'm looking for Detective Grafton or Bernhardt," I told the lady behind
the glass. She was wearing a uniform but looked like the only thing she
would ever be running for was maybe the last doughnut.

	"Can I tell them what this is concerning?" she asked with polite
disinterest.

	"It's concerning the death of Joey Taylor," I told her. Her eyes flicked up
at me but quickly decided I still wasn't interesting.

	"Have a seat," she ordered. I did.

	Twenty minutes later I was just about to leave when an interior door opened
and Detective Grafton popped his head into the room. He seemed to be
surprised to see me. He waved me back and I followed him down a short,
carpeted hall and into a cramped office that from the looks of things he
must have shared with Detective Bernhardt. There were coffee rings on the
tops layer of papers that covered both desks and crumpled balls of fast food
wrappers cluttered the floor near the trash can.

	"So what's up, kid?" he said as he sat down behind his desk. He didn't
offer but I sat down in one of the chairs that were set facing him.

	"Someone sent this to me today," I said as I pulled the letter out of my
pocket. It was a little worse for wear after spending the better part of the
day in there, but I smoothed it out best I could and handed it to him. Then
I took off the necklace and handed it over as well.

	Grafton looked at the paper disdainfully then back at me with a raised
eyebrow. I unfolded the letter and laid it back in front of him.

	"What wasn't an accident?" he said finally.

	"I think they mean Joey's death," I said, feeling more than a little
uncomfortable having to explain what seemed plain as day to me to the
detective. "The necklace is Joey's. He never took it off and his mom told me
it wasn't with his things when she...after she..."

	"Look, son," I hate it when people who aren't my father call me son.
Actually I hate it when my father calls me son. "We investigated this death
backwards and forwards. We had some questions but you were the one that
wrapped things up. You're friend was drunk; no, he was pickled. He was way
over the legal limit. No one saw anything suspicious and trust me, we talked
to everybody there and tracked down those like yourself who chose to leave
before the real party got started. In fact, nobody saw anything after you
two disappeared upstairs together and before he was found floating face down
in the pool. If there were any suspicion of foul play you'd be suspect
numero uno. As it is, it's an open and shut case. Drunk college kid falls
into pool and drowns. Sad story, but not a new one. I'm sorry someone played
a sick joke like this on you."

	"So that's it? You just think it's some kind of joke?"

	"Honestly? Yeah, that's what I think it is. But I'll tell you what, if
it'll make you feel any better I'll make a note on the case file and keep a
copy of the letter. If anything like this happens again we'll look into
filing some sort of harassment charges."

	"What would make me feel better is if you took me seriously. He never took
this necklace off. Never. Not once in the entire time I knew him."

	"Look, he was drunk. It could have fallen off and he wouldn't have even
noticed. Maybe even in your little tussle. Somebody finds it, recognizes it,
knows you're his best friend and decides to send it to you with this note.
Typical college prank."

	"I've been wearing the necklace all afternoon and it's been fine; the clasp
works and nothing is broken."

	"What is it exactly you think I can do? You've handled the necklace, heck
you've worn it! This note looks like you ran it through a food processor,
what are we supposed to do with it? Do you have the box it came in?"

	"There was no return address so I threw it away," I said weakly.

	"Then there you go. There's nothing I can do even if I thought there was
something to do, which I don't."

	I knew there was no point in arguing further; I would just be beating a
dead horse. "Can I keep the necklace?" I asked.

	The detective shrugged. "I don't even have any reason to believe it was the
kid's except you said so. It's between you and the mom."

	I picked up the necklace and fastened it around my neck once again. Then I
stood and started to leave. "Sorry for taking up your time."

	"Look, kid, I'm sorry," he said when I was at the door. "It's a shitty deal
all around."

	"Yeah," I agreed, "It is."

- - -

	As hard as I tried to forget the note and concentrate on my painting my
mind refused to let go. The detective had dismissed the idea of Joey's death
being anything but an accident so easily, but the necklace was really
bothering me. Together with the note it was just more than I could pass off.
Finally I couldn't stand it anymore and I went to look for Aidan. I found
him in his bedroom busily typing away on his computer.

	"Aidan, can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked tentatively.

	He immediately pushed back from the computer, "Of course," he said.

	I sat down on the edge of the bed and filled him in on the events of the
day. When I was finished he thought for a moment.

	"As far as the package goes," he said, "you might try checking with the
delivery company. They may have records or something. It's a long shot but
worth a try. As for Caitlin, I just hope you know what you are getting
yourself in for. But either way, I told you I would support you and I will."

	It wasn't exactly what I had hoped for but checking with the delivery
company sounded like a good idea and having something concrete to do made me
feel better. I was able to go back to my painting. I finished off the
evening with a few chapters of So You're Having A Baby.

	I ran by the delivery company on my way to work the next morning but was
disappointed to learn that the guy who had been working on Saturday only
worked on weekends so I'd have to wait until then to talk to him.

	The next few days were spent working, painting, fretting about Joey's death
and reading baby books. Finally Wednesday rolled around. Aidan and I spent
the afternoon cooking spaghetti, which was pretty much the only thing we
were sure we could pull off.  I made the sauce from scratch, and even though
by the time I was finished I looked like I had been slaughtering hogs, I was
quite proud of the results.

	Caitlin arrived promptly at six and we all sat down to eat. Conversation at
the table was polite and mostly generalities. After the dishes had been
cleared we all settled into the living room for some real conversation.

	"Well, I've thought about everything," Caitlin began, "the baby, your offer
and all; and I decided that I'd be crazy not to accept your offer,
especially if we make it legal and all. I'm going to need all the help I can
get."

	"What about your parents?" Aidan asked.

	"I haven't told them yet," she said with a frown, "I don't know if I even
want to. They're going to totally freak out. My step-dad will anyway. He's
really strict. My mom won't be sober long enough to care one way or the
other. I haven't seen my real dad since I was 12."

	"How old are you now?"

	"I'll be nineteen in January."

	"Do you work?'

	"I'm a full time student."

	"What's your major?"

	"I haven't decided yet. I feel like I'm being interviewed for something
here."

	I was getting the same impression so I quickly stepped in and changed the
subject. "How'd the doctor's appointment go?"

	She broke into a grin, "Great! I got to see the baby on the sonogram. It's
too early yet to know what it is though. The doctor said the baby was doing
fine though, right where it should be for where I am. I also found out that
my insurance will cover almost everything. I just have to pay like a small
amount at each visit."

	"That's great!" I said, "When do you go back again?"

	"In two weeks. I'll be 9 weeks then."

	"Can I go with you?"

	Caitlin and Aidan both looked at me as if I had suddenly sprouted antennae
and ordered them to take me to their leader.

	"What?" I said defensively.

	"You want to go with me to see the doctor?" Caitlin asked.

	"Yeah, I've been reading all these baby books and I'd really like to be
involved as much as possible; well as much as you feel comfortable with
anyway."

	"Well, I guess if you are sure you want to..."

	"I'm sure, as long as you're sure you don't mind."

	"I guess not." She didn't sound too sure.

	We all sat in an uncomfortable silence for what seemed like an eternity.
Finally Aidan broke the moment, "So, uh, what are you doing for
Thanksgiving?" he said to Caitlin.

	The sudden shift in subject seemed to catch her off guard as if she had
been thinking about something else. I was a little surprised myself, but
mostly because I had forgotten that Thanksgiving was the very next day! I
was glad he'd reminded me. I'd been invited to dinner at Killian's house
along with Aidan. Apparently they had some kind of tradition of inviting
lost souls to Thanksgiving dinner and I fit the bill.

	"I don't really have any plans," she said, "I don't really feel up to
tackling the 'rents right now and I don't know anyone else. I'll probably
just settle on some Stouffer's turkey and dressing."

	"Hey Aidan," I said suddenly, "Do you think Killian's dad would mind if
Caitlin came too?"

	"No, I couldn't! I don't want to intrude," Caitlin insisted.

	"Actually," Aidan said thoughtfully, "I seriously doubt they would mind at
all. Their motto seems to be the more the merrier. I mean none of them even
knew me last year except Aunt Meg and I was completely welcome. Why don't I
call and find out at least?" He left the room the make the call.

	"So you're reading baby books now, huh?" Caitlin said with a grin, "I
haven't even started reading baby books yet. It still doesn't seem real
somehow."

	"Well it is real and your better get your rear in gear, missy," I teased. I
picked up the book I had finished reading the night before and handed it to
her, "Let me recommend a book."

	"So You're Having A Baby," she read aloud then looked at me with raised
eyebrow.

	"It was very informative," I said defensively.

	"I bet," she laughed, "Seriously though, I will read it if you don't mind."

	"Help yourself. That was the whole idea."

	"So when do you lose that cast?"

	"Not for a few more weeks," I sighed, "I can't wait. It itches like hell."

	"Ok, I talked to Adam," announced Aidan as he came back into the room, "He
says to bring anyone we want; they're cooking for a small army."

	"Great, then it's settled," I said.

	"I suppose," Caitlin said doubtfully, then brightened, "How about those
paintings?"

	I showed her what I had finished and she was gratifyingly impressed.

	"Wait until you see them all framed and matted. You wouldn't believe the
difference it makes," I told her, "I have to have them all dropped off by
Friday morning so that Nikki can get them done. She's calling in some favors
with her framer to get them done last minute like this. Hey, why don't you
come to the show Friday night?"

	"That would be fun. Is it formal?"

	"Yeah, technically it's by invitation only but I think I can wrangle you
in."

	"After all, you are the star," she teased. And of course I blushed.

- - -

	Since Killian only lived about half an hour away we didn't leave until late
afternoon. We spent a lazy morning watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day
Parade and I even managed to paint a little. Caitlin met us at the apartment
and we all drove down together.

	We arrived at Killian's house, a two-story cedar shingled beach house, a
little early but an enthusiastic Killian and Asher met us at the door. We
were ushered in and introduced to the others already there, well Caitlin and
I were introduced; Aidan already knew pretty much everyone. First I met Adam
and Steve, Killian's legal guardians. They were the first gay couple I'd
ever met beside Asher and Killian. Adam was tall and trim with graying
reddish blonde hair and blue eyes. Steve looked amazingly like a Tom Selleck
from his Magnum PI days. Also early were friends of Adam and Steve's named
Ilana and Lysander and their new baby daughter, Melody.

	While Caitlin and I were stilling ooing and ahing over Melody, Killian's
mom and little brother got back from a last minute trip to the grocery
store. Killian's mom, Meg, was beautiful and looked much too young to have a
son Killian's age. Kane looked like an adorable little elf with bright green
eyes and spiky blonde hair.

	The last of the guests arrived soon after. They turned out to be another
couple, Bryant and Calvin. Bryant was the picture of health, with smooth
skin tanned to a warm glow, wavy dark hair and muscles that rippled under
his ribbed turtleneck sweater. Calvin on the other hand looked as if he was
a walking corpse. He was wraith thin and so pale I got the impression if I
looked away he might have disappeared before I looked back. His wispy hair
was almost white and his eyes were such a pale shade of blue they too looked
almost colorless.

	Once everyone was ready we gathered around two large tables they had set up
and Adam stood up to give the blessing.

	"Before we get started," he said, "I want to say how honored Steve and I
are that each of you could join us today as we celebrate Thanksgiving. Some
of you are familiar faces, and it's good to see you again, and some are new
faces. And then some, like Will, are a new but familiar face." Everyone
laughed and I turned red as every looked from me to Asher. "We started a
tradition last year and it was such a smashing success that we purposefully
planned it the same way this year. We invited just enough people so that we
could have 13 guests, not counting Melody. Well, last night Aidan calls and
asks if they can bring along a friend. I never turn anyone down so I said
the heck with tradition; bring it on. Well, lo and behold, who should call
this morning but Killian and Asher's friend, Jake. He was supposed to be
flying in this morning and spending a few days with us but had decided to
stay in California with his new family for his first Thanksgiving with them.
While I was disappointed I have to say that I think he made the right
choice. The bright side is that the tradition continues, and once again it's
proven that God does have a sense of humor."

	Dinner was incredible. I'd never seen so much food. The turkey was so big I
thought someone must have shot Big Bird, plus there was ham, candied yams,
green beans, mountains of fluffy mashed potatoes, gallons of gravy,
stuffing, warm yeast rolls, coleslaw, artichokes and three different kinds
of pies for desert. Steve and Adam must have been cooking for days. The
atmosphere was festive as food was passed around and conversation flowed
back and forth like a tide. When everyone had eaten their fill, and then
some, Adam and Steve went around the table with an after dinner wine and
coffee. Even Kane was allowed a small glass of the sweet red wine. Only
Caitlin refused, covering her glass with her hand and smiling with a shake
of the head.

	Eventually we managed to waddle into the living room for phase two of the
tradition as Adam put it. We sat in a loose circle on chairs, the sofa and
the floor. Once everyone was settled Adam once again spoke up.

	"Last year Aidan came up with this little gem and we're going to continue
the practice if everyone is game. What we'll do is we'll go around the room
one person at a time, and say one thing that you are thankful for. If you
absolutely can't keep it to one thing a panel of judges will evaluate the
merit of each request on an individual basis. "

	Everyone laughed and looked at Bryant who put on an innocent expression.

	"Who'd like to go first?" Adam asked.

	"I will," said Lysander, I'm thankful that we now have a healthy, happy
baby girl. For those of you who were here last year you'll remember that it
was one year ago tonight that we made the big announcement."

	Ilana smiled down at the sleeping bundle in her arms. "What can I add to
that?" she said.

	"That's it?" Adam said.

	"Sandy said it all," Ilana said tranquilly.

	"Ok, new rule," Adam said, "You have to come up with your own thing to be
thankful for."

	Calvin was next. He waited for the laughter to die down, took a deep breath
and then smiled shakily. "I'm thankful to be alive for one more
Thanksgiving." The room was deadly quiet for a few beats before the silence
was broken by a muffled sob from Bryant. No one knew what to say and after a
moment Calvin went on. "We found out a few months ago that I'm HIV
positive." There was a chorus of gasps from around the room. "I've been
having health problems for about a year now and they tested for HIV early on
and nothing showed up. So far...so far Bryant has tested negative."

	By now Bryant had pulled himself together enough to take his turn, "I'm
thankful for whatever time we have left. We're going to make the most of
it."

	No one said anything for several minutes as the clock ticked noisily on the
wall. Finally Bryant gave a slightly hysterical giggle, "Well, wasn't that
quite the show stopper. Next year we'll go last." Everyone laughed and the
tension seemed to be broken. Some questions were asked about treatment;
Calvin had opted for an aggressive treatment but it was too soon to tell how
effective it would be.

	"Well," Adam said some time later, "I guess we'd better get back to our
thanksgiving. It's my turn and well, I'm thankful that it's been almost a
year since anyone in my family has been threatened, held at knifepoint or
almost blown up. In fact, no one has had anything worse than a cold. It's
been very peaceful and deliciously dull. And for that I am very thankful."

	Steve nodded, "Me too." Adam shot him a look and he hurried on, "I have my
own, don't worry. I was just saying that wholeheartedly agreed with yours
too. I'm thankful that I have been blessed enough to not only find my soul's
mate, but to also truly love his family as my own and be accepted by them. I
am truly content and happy in my life. Your turn, Meg."

	"Well, I'm thankful most of all to get to see my handsome son again and see
how happy and well adjusted he is these days. As an extension of that, so
I'm still on my first thing Adam, I'm also thankful for my second son,
Asher." Asher blushed and for once I was glad to see someone else turn red
besides me. "Now, I would like to ask for a second thing if I may."

	Adam gave an exaggerated sigh, "You're really pushing the limits Meg, but I
suppose we'll allow it."

	"Thanks, you're a dear. I'm also thankful that things have been going well
for me up in PA. The divorce is now final and I've managed to get back into
school. I'm really excited about my future for the first time in a long
time. Now I'm done. You're next, Kane."

	 "Um..." Kane thought a moment, "I'm thankful that my mom is talking to me
again and things are better between us now, so now I get to see my mom and
my dad."

	I made a mental note to ask Aidan what that was about later.

	"My turn," announced Killian, "I'm thankful for two things. Is that ok?"

	"Go ahead, we set a precedent with your mother."

	"'K, well, I'm thankful that my real dad is behind bars where he belongs
and where he can't hurt anyone else."

	"Here, here," muttered Meg under her breath.

	" I'm also thankful that I found my soul mate too, but to make mine
different from Steve's, I'm glad my soul mate found me."

	Asher smiled goofily at Killian while the chorus of aww's died down, "I'm
thankful that Killian and I were both accepted at the same college. Next
year, we'll be going to school with you Aidan."

	After a round of congratulations it was Aidan's turn. "Mine is a multiple
part thanks but it's really all one. I'm thankful that Aunt Meg brought me
down here with her last year because out of that one trip has come so much
good. One, I was able to accept that I was gay with a little help from my
not-so-little cousin, Killian. Two, I made successful move from PA to the
Shore. And three is the part I'm most thankful for, I made the best friend
I've ever had in my whole life, and he's my roommate, Will."

	I flushed crimson and stared down at my feet but it was my turn and every
eye in the room was on me. I cleared my throat and spoke up, "I guess it's
my turn, huh? I know most of you don't know me, but I'm Asher's cousin. No
one knows this but Aidan, not even you Ash, but about a month ago I tried to
kill myself because I was gay."

	Everyone's mouth dropped open at once. I almost giggled out loud they
looked so comical. Not even Asher had been told what had really happened,
everyone had just been told that I fell off the fire escape. "There were a
lot of other factors, but what it boils down to is that I was a selfish
coward and I tried to run from my problems instead of dealing with them.
Aidan helped me to see that and ever since then, even though I've still had
a lot of stuff going on, I've known that I had to face my problems head on.
So I guess all of that was to say that I'm thankful that God didn't take the
life that I tried to throw away. Instead, He gave me a second chance." After
that somewhat lengthy speech I suddenly realized I was the center of
attention and began to blush again. Luckily Caitlin spoke up and shifted the
focus off me, or so I thought.

	"I'm new here too," she began softly, "I really don't know any of you that
well, I've even only known Will a few weeks, but you've all made me feel so
welcome, like I was part of a family. I'm really glad Will asked me to come,
but that's not what I'm most thankful for. I'm most thankful for Will
himself. He kept me from making a horrible mistake that would have probably
haunted me for the rest of my life. You see, I'm pregnant and I'm not
married and the father just died. Even before he died though he told me that
he didn't want to have anything to do with the baby. He told me to have an
abortion and that's what I decided I would do." She stopped for a moment as
tears began to roll down her cheeks, "Then I met Will, and he forced me to
see what I didn't want to see; that this was an innocent life that I created
as a result of my bad decisions. And that life shouldn't have to pay for my
mistakes. Then he went beyond just offering advice, he offered himself. He's
going to help me raise my baby so that I can have it and keep it."

	For the third time that night a stunned silence fell over the room as I
tried to shrink under the sofa. Finally Adam spoke in a somewhat awed voice,
"Wow... well...that certainly gives us all something to work towards."

	I couldn't stand it any longer, "I'm nothing special," I protested, "It was
just something that I knew I had to do. Haven't you ever just known that you
had to do something even though you weren't quite sure why? You just know
you have to."

	"But that's exactly what makes it all the more special," Meg said, "I'm
sure that all of have experiences what you just described, but how many of
us can say that we actually acted on that urging? Most people just ignore
that compelling, pass it off as insensible or unrealizable. Or maybe they
just don't have the faith to step out and take that kind of risk, Besides,
all true heroes never know they are heroes. They just simply are."

	"I'm definitely not a hero," I argues, my face blazing away, "I'm so
screwed up I've tried to kill myself twice in the last two months. Aidan is
the real hero. He saved my life both times."

	Aidan opened his mouth to argue, but Steve cut him off, "The mark of a true
hero, or true bravery, is this - not a lack of fear, that's just
foolishness, but rather to be afraid but do what you know you must do
anyway."

	Everyone thought that over quietly for a few minutes.

	"Ok, enough philosophical wanderings," Adam said suddenly, "This night is
supposed to be about a celebration of life, so let's start living! Who's up
for a game of taboo?"

	Lysander and Ilana were the first to leave, saying they needed to get
Melody to bed. Bryant and Calvin left shortly after since Calvin was visibly
tiring. Aidan, Caitlin and I prepared to leave too since we had the drive
home still ahead of us.

	"You guys are coming to my show tomorrow night aren't you?" I asked before
we left.

	"Are you kidding? We wouldn't miss it for anything!" Killian exclaimed.

	"Great," I said, "Why don't you two plan on staying for a little while
after? I have something I need to talk to you about."

	"Sure, that shouldn't be a problem. It's not a school night," he said.

	"What was that about?" Aidan asked once we were in the car.

	"What was what about?" I asked innocently.

	"What do you need to talk to Killian and Asher about?"

	"That matter we were discussing the other night; you know, the note?"

	"Oh...I don't understand."

	"We'll talk about it later," I said meaningfully.

	"What Will is trying to say is drop it while Caitlin's around," Caitlin
said with amusement in her voice. I laughed as she gracefully changed the
subject, "Will, thanks for inviting me. It was great."

	"It was, wasn't it?" I agreed. "I'm glad you could come. You're still
coming tomorrow night too aren't you?"

	"I wouldn't miss it for the world. I just hope I can still fit into the
dress I was planning on wearing."

	"Are you gaining weight with the baby?"

	She laughed, "Not yet! I was talking about that huge meal we just had. I
don't think I'll be able to eat for a week."

	We all laughed.

	"It was great wasn't it?" I said, "I think it was the best Thanksgiving
ever and I'm not just talking about the food."

	I settled back into the seat in contentment. If I could just make it
through tomorrow night, I thought, I would be home free. If I had only known
how wrong I was.