Date: Sun, 20 Apr 2008 05:05:32 -0700 (PDT)
From: Doug Smith <das11111@yahoo.com>
Subject: The Diary - Chapter 5

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This story is a work of FICTION. The events described have only occurred in
my mind.  Any similarities to actual events or persons are strictly
coincidental.

THIS STORY CONTAINS GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF CONSENSUAL SEXUAL ACTS BETWEEN
COLLEGE AGE MALES AS WELL AS THEIR EARLIER EXPERIENCES. IT IS INTENDED FOR
A MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY! IF YOU FIND THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL OFFENSIVE, IF YOU
ARE UNDER 18, OR UNDER THE LEGAL AGE TO VIEW SUCH MATERIAL THEN PLEASE READ
NO FURTHER.

PLEASE NOTE: Feedback, both positive and negative, is welcomed and greatly
appreciated. Please understand this is my first story so please don't flame
me too bad.  Please email das11111@yahoo.com
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Ryan and I just looked at each other.  "What???"

"Relax bro, I still like girls.  I just figured what the heck, I had broken
up with Diane, it had to beat jerking off and I was horny. Besides, you
always told me guys give better blowjobs.  You were right."

"I was just giving you a hard time when you said she couldn't 'suck for
shit' was the phrase I think you used."

"Now you tell me," Tom laughed.  Seriously though, it's cool.  I just have
a little harmless fun once in awhile."

"As long as you're careful."

"Bro, relax, I had that course in middle school and I'm not stupid. Can we
go get pizza now, I'm starved."

I put my hand on his shoulder and smiled.  "It's OK, really.  You just
surprised me, that's all. I just care about you."

"I know."

"Maybe I should have been worried when you had your hands all over each
other earlier," Ryan said.

We both looked at him and said in unison.  "Don't be gross Ryan."  The
three of us laughing and Dan not knowing quite what to do.

We walked down the road to Adama's.  "So, you want to give us any details?"

"Nope," he said with a smile. "Not unless you tell me about some of the
stuff you and Ryan do."

"OK, point taken. I take it mom and dad don't know anything about this."

"Hell no, not everyone is stupid enough to get caught being fucked in their
bedroom when mom comes up to put laundry away."

"Don't remind me.  That's definitely not how I wanted them to find out
about me. They still haven't accepted I'm gay and have a boyfriend."

"They still love you.  You should talk to them more."

"I know, it's just some of the things they said really hurt.  Plus Ryan
didn't deserve that."

"You should have locked your door."

"I know, I should have.  We didn't expect her to come home and we weren't
really planning it.  Things just sort of happened."

Dan laughed, "I'm trying to picture that. I can imagine what my parents
would have done."

Fortunately we got to Adama's so we changed the subject. The place was
mobbed.  The pregame show was on most of the TVs and people were getting
rowdy.  Our friends knew we were coming and had saved us some seats.  They
hadn't expected all four of us though so we all had to squeeze together.
Something I didn't mind being next to Ryan.  It also didn't look like Dan
and Tom minded either.  I introduced Tom to my friends and he seemed to get
along with them right away.

It was great being out with friends.  We just sat around the table, joking,
and watching the game.  It was a good game at least from our perspective.
It looked like we'd be playing another day.  Mike and his girlfriend Sandra
were there and announced they were getting married.  Everyone gave them a
hard time.  Big surprise we laughed.  They laughed too and everyone was
havng a good time.

 Not to be outdone, Mike asked me if Ryan and I had set a date yet.

"What? No, what are you talking about?"

"Well, this is Massachusetts.  You two could get married here.  It would be
legal."

"Yea, well ... maybe we will someday but I think I can say for both of us
that's a ways off, we've never considered it. Marriage is a big commitment.
"

Ryan didn't say anything except that he had to go to the men's room.  He
was gone awhile but it was crowded so I didn't think much of it.  Finally I
saw him coming back and he looked upset, like he had been crying.

"Ryan, are you OK?"

"I'm fine.  I'm just going back to the apartment."

"What's wrong? Are you feeling OK?"

He just mumbled something and headed for the door.  I started to go after
him but then looked at Tom and Dan.  It was obvious Ryan was upset.  "Go,"
they said.

"What about you?" I asked Tom.

"Don't worry.  I'll find my way back."

"Yea, don't worry about him," Dan added.  "Go find out what's wrong with
Ryan. You won't enjoy yourself here anyway."

I said I'd see them back at the apartment and went after Ryan.  I saw him
halfway down the street.

"Hey Ryan, wait up."  Trying to catch up with him.  "What's wrong anyway?"

He just kept walking telling me to go back to Adama's.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong.  Why did you just leave like that?"

"I needed to get out of there, now please Chris, just leave me alone for
awhile."

I walked with him in silence back to the apartment.  He started walking
faster the closer we got, like he was trying to get away from me.  I
followed him in but when we got to the bedroom door he shut it in my face.

"Ryan, let me in," trying the door.  "Ryan ...."

"Leave me alone Chris, go back to Adama's."  He didn't yell like he was
mad.  He just said to go away.

"No way man, not until you tell me what's going on."  I listened at the
door but didn't hear anything.  I didn't know whether to be hurt, mad,
concerned or all three.  We had always been open when we were upset.  He
had to know I was concerned and not knowing what was going on was painful.

I sat on the couch trying to think what had happened.  Did I do something?
Say something?  He was fine when we were eating but definitely not himself
when he came back from the men's room.  Maybe it was the talk about
marriage.  Maybe he thought I was blowing off the idea and he really wanted
to.  I just didn't think that was the time or place to discuss it.  After
all, we had never talked about it before.  I didn't think that could be it
though.  He might have gotten upset but this was something else.  It had to
be.

I thought about breaking the lock but didn't know what good that would do.
If he didn't want to talk then he wouldn't say anything if I was with him
or not.  He'd probably just get mad and we'd just have to fix the door.

I just sat on the couch and tried to sort things out although since I
didn't know what was going on so there wasn't much I could sort out.  Tom's
stuff was on the floor and I began to wonder how he was doing.  Other than
worrying about Ryan and me he was probably having a good time.  I'm sure he
was enjoying the game and knew Dan would make sure he got back OK.  I just
sat on the couch thinking of things that could be wrong, each worse than
the one before.  It's amazing what the imagination can do. The next thing I
knew I was looking at the clock and it was 1:30.

Tom still wasn't back.  The game had to be over by now and people would
have left Adama's.  I knew he was with Dan so he'd be OK.  It's not like
Dan would have taken him drinking or anything.  By 2:30 I was getting
worried.

Finally I thought to go next door to see if Dan was there.  Guess I really
wasn't thinking straight.  I should have gone earlier.  I knocked on Dan's
door but nobody answered.  After knocking a few more times Dan finally
opened the door.  Standing in the opening in his gym shorts.

"Where's Tom?"

"Relax, he's here.  He didn't want to bother you.  How's Ryan?"

"I don't know.  He locked himself in the bedroom and hasn't said anything.
I woke up on the couch and got worried when Tom wasn't back.  You should
have said something."

"I'm sorry, I told you he'd be fine."

"Yea, I know.  I'm sorry.  Tonight has just been kind of crazy."

"It's OK.  I hope Ryan is OK."

"Thanks, is Tom asleep?"

"Ahhh ... ," Dan turned red.

"Dan!!! I wanted you to watch him, not .... oh, never mind," seeing him
smile.  I had to smile too although I was a little jealous too.  "Guess I'm
just over-protective of my brother."

Tom stuck his head out the door.  "Relax, bro ... I'm fine. Dan is being a
good host."

The way he stayed behind the door I knew he was naked.  "Do you need
anything from your bag?"

"No, I'm all set.  Go back and check on Ryan."

"OK, I'm just glad I know where you are."

"Thanks, bro .... I love you too.  See you in the morning."

I smiled, "Good night.  Have fun."

"Already did," he smiled but since you woke us up we might have to have fun
again.  He moved slightly and I could see he was definitely naked behind
the door.  I couldn't see anything else and felt a little dirty for
thinking about it.  I can't remember to last time I saw him naked.  I
couldn't help but try to imagine what his cock looked like.  I think he
knew too since he moved next to Dan showing me his lean body.  Our eyes met
after I checked him out and he smiled telling me to go back to Ryan.
Closing the door.

I went back to our apartment and laid on the couch.  There wasn't anything
else to do so I tried to get comfortable so I could get some sleep.  I
hated sleeping on the couch.  It was really uncomfortable.  I remembered
how last night I was watching Ryan sleep.  Tonight I was on the couch
wondering what was going on.  The image of Tom's cock also flashed in my
head.  What was up with that?  I must have slept some but it couldn't have
been very soundly.  I woke up when Ryan sat on the edge of the couch and
kissed my forehead.

"I'm sorry," he said.  Looking around, "where's Tom?"

"Next door, with Dan.  Are you ready to tell me what's wrong?"

"Come on to bed. You don't have to sleep here."

He stood up and took my hand.  Pulling me up and into the bedroom.

We fell onto the bed.  "I'm sorry," he said.  "will you forgive me?"

"I just want to know what's wrong.  Did I do something?"

"No, is that what you thought?"

"I didn't know.  I thought a lot of things.  I even thought you were upset
at what I said when Mike asked when we're getting married."

"No, no," he said.  "You didn't do anything and we've never talked about
marriage.  It's definitely known of there business.  Why you'd want me, I
don't know."

"What are you talking about?  I can't imagine being married to anyone else.
It's just that we aren't even out of college yet.  There's no hurry.  It's
not like I'm going to get you pregnant," I laughed.

"It had nothing to do with that."

"Then what happened?"

"Well, .... remember the guy I told you about from my old school.  The one
who betrayed me."

"Yea, of course.  That was a long time ago.  Why are you bringing it up
now?"

"Because he was there tonight.  He was in the men's room at Adama's."

"What?? Was he visiting someone or does he go here?"

"I don't know.  It's not like we talked and caught up.  He recognized me
when I walked in and just laughed about what happened in high school.  He
held his cock out, asking if I still wanted it and just laughed at me. I
couldn't believe it.  All those feelings from high school just came back.
I felt like that humiliated 16 year old again.  I just went into the stall
and sat there, crying."

I put my hand on his forehead and brushed his hair back.  "Ryan, you're not
that kid, you know that.  I just wish you hadn't shut me out.  You can't
imagine the thoughts that went through my head."

"I know.  I was being an idiot.  I realized that after feeling sorry for
myself for the last four hours.  Can you forgive me."

I smiled.  "Well,,, it'll be hard.  I might need some convincing and rolled
over on top of him."  Moving my lips to his, smiling, "Ryan, I love you so
much.  I thought you understood that. Promise you won't do that again."

"I do and I won't.  I just hope he's just visiting and he doesn't go here.
He might have transferred."

"Don't worry about him, just ignore him and you saying 'I do' does sound
good, but lets just hold it off a few years."

We embraced and kissed each other again.  It was probably good Tom was next
door but it wouldn't have mattered.  I just wanted to make love with Ryan.
I had felt bad not knowing what was going on but he felt worse.  I wanted
to fix that.

Holding him I could feel the blood surging through my veins or whatever
caused that great feeling when you're holding the person you love.  I
reached down and helped Ryan out of his shorts.  Working out of mine at the
same time.

"I want you so bad," I moaned as we embraced again.  Our naked bodies
together and our cocks grinding together with me on top of him. I held him
and kissed him as passionately as I could.  My tongue pushing between his
lips.  Ryan just moaned my name.

"Shhh," I whispered.  I'm going to kiss ever inch of your body as I gently
kiss his forehead, his face and cheeks.  "Promise me you won't act like
that again," kissing his chin and his eyes.  I couldn't help myself.  I
felt bad that he shut me out but also sad that he let it bother him so
much. I could feel his hard cock against me as I slid down to kiss his
chest.  Licking each nipple in turn, teasing them, nibbling them.

"I told you I was going to kiss every inch, I smiled, moving my lips
towards his armpit.  I didn't go very far but did push my tongue under his
arm.

He laughed like I was tickling him.  I smiled and continued my tour.
Kissing his chest, then his abs, down around his waist.  It was so slow and
passionate.  It felt so good.  My entire body felt the passion as I kiss
Ryan's thighs. Up and down his legs.  I wanted him to feel so good.  I
worked my way back towards his crotch hearing his soft moans as I licked
his balls.  The problems of the last few hours faded away as we enjoyed the
quiet and each other.

Ryan moaned as I took his big cock in my hand, giving it a kiss.  "Turn
around," he said.  "I want to make you feel good too."

"You already are," I smiled but turned around getting into a 69 position
laying side by side.  I felt his warm mouth on my cock as I licked the
precum from his.  "Oh Ryan," I moaned.  "I love you." Putting my lips
around his cock.  I could have done this all night, or at least the rest of
it but knew I was going to blow soon.  I closed my eyes feeling Ryan's
mouth over my cock as I sucked him.  We didn't say anything and all you
could hear were our moans as we enjoyed each other.  It didn't take long,
Ryan's body started to buck as he started to suck harder.  I lowered my
lips further onto his cock just as the first volley of his seed shot into
the back of my throat.

"Oh Chris," he moaned as I swallowed his load.  As he finished he went to
work harder on my cock.  Putting his hands on my ass and pulling me into
him.  He took my entire cock pushing his lips against my body.

"Oh god, Ryan." I felt his throat squeeze my cock.  It didn't take long and
I began to erupt.  My cum shooting down his throat.  His mouth kept working
me as my balls emptied.  He swallowed everything and kept sucking me as my
cock softened.  I sucked the last drops of his cum from his cock before
pulling out and turning around.  We kissed again and smiled.

"You can sulk all you want if that is how we make up," I smiled.

He smiled and we kissed again.  Holding each other tightly.  "Thank you,"
he said.

"For what?"

"For reminding me how lucky I am."

"Next time let me do that earlier."  Kissing his forehead.

We fell asleep in each others arms but the image of Tom with Dan also
flashed in my mind.

TO BE CONTINUED

As always, thank you all for your comments.  I've tried to answer everyone
and appreciate your emails.