Date: Tue, 19 Oct 1999 13:16:17 EDT
From: Breakers76@aol.com
Subject: The DJ Part 2

     This story is fiction any similarities between persons either living
or dead is purely coincidental (although any good writer will write what he
knows).  This is a story that deals with male-to-male relationships as well
as homosexual sex.  If this offends you or is illegal in your location
please do not read any further.  This statement releases me the author and
the site wherein this story is posted from any legal action.  Copyright
1999 by Patrick Sean Purdy.


Chapter 4: Conversations

     As people started to filter home and leave our party, I noticed a few
of my fellow hosts in the hot-tub, but a few had already gone to bed or
fell asleep on the couch.  By 5:30 when the last guests had gone home, and
Brandon had quit for the evening, I was still wide awake.  I noticed
Brandon looked fatigued for the first time.  I went over to him to help him
pack away his equipment.

     "Dude, I'm exhausted, I can't talk about money now," Brandon said as I
walked over.

     "I didn't come over here for that," I replied, "I came over to help
you pack up.  Actually, do you have anywhere to be in the morning
tomorrow?"

     "No, why?"

     "Because," I answered, "We could just close everything up and just
bring it under the roof.  That way you can catch some sleep here and head
back to Jax tomorrow.  I know it's not far, but even twenty miles can be
hell when you are drop-dead-tired.  Trust me I figured that out the hard
way."  I remembered nights of my own coming back from gay clubs,
unbeknownst to my friends, in Daytona and Jacksonville and how I swerved
all over I-95 or A1A.  I remembered how often I would pull over for
twenty-minute naps to prevent me from totally wrecking my car and myself.
I remembered, finally, how I would sober up at the thought of having to
contact one of my friends in case of an emergency, then explaining to them
how I got where I was and why I went out in the first place.  Fear of
disapproval always woke me up.

     "Thanks," he said, "That'd be cool."  So we started packing things up
and as we were moving them we figured we'd just pack them into his car.
This action actually woke him up a little more, rather than tire him out
even more.

     "Dude," Brandon said to me, "I am just too tired.  I can't even go to
sleep anymore."

     "I'm not either, and I have to help cook for all these people
tomorrow."

     "Hey, is the hot tub still working," Brandon asked.

     "Sure," I said, "let's fire it up."

     Brandon just jumped in with his boxers after shucking his shorts in
record time.  I went over to the controls and turned on the air jets as
Brandon slipped into the hot tub.  I asked Brandon if he wanted something
to drink: beer, wine cooler, soda, or whatever.

     "Beer's good," he said.

     So, I grabbed two beer's and turned on the patio stereo system to a
low volume and a Top 40 station.  I handed Brandon his beer as I took off
my slacks, leaving me in my swim trunks from earlier in the evening.  We
sat there starting to chat about nothing in particular when the 80's
classic "There She Goes" came on the stereo.  Simultaneously, Brandon and I
started singing falsetto to the chorus.  We looked at each other bleakly
for a moment then started laughing out loud at ourselves and each other.
Giggling, and pointing to one another, it was a good laugh.

     "Evan-dude," Brandon said, "You're hysterical.  I don't care what I
heard your friends saying about you; you are one cool guy."

     "Uh-oh," I thought to myself, "What did they let out of the bag, did
they really not like me, what could they have said?"  All these questions
flashed through my head.  After a few concerned seconds I asked, "What'd
you hear?"

     "Nothing dude, I was just fucking with you."

     "Oh," I replied, "Real funny there Bran, see if you get your bonus
now."

     We broke out laughing again.

     "Honestly though," I said, regaining composure, "I think you're cool.
We'll have to hang out together sometime, and see what trouble finds us."

     "Yeah, that'd be awesome . . . So, who is Evan?"

     "Whatcha' mean," I answered, "I'm Evan."  I thought for a second the
hot-tub and beer had become too much for him, or maybe he had taken
something recreational earlier, which I hadn't noticed.

     "I know that, guy.  I meant besides being the most popular guy on
campus, to which this party attests; being a guy who gets a piece whenever
he wants; besides being totally in love with my 80's, and all of my music
mixes, who is Evan?"

     I was pretty taken aback by the question, because I've never heard it
in a normal guy-to-guy conversation.  It was something I expected from a
date, not a new friend, but I started talking about my interests, school,
et cetera.  Meanwhile, Brandon would put his two-cents in when needed,
offer up the same information about himself and just basically chatted.  It
was nice to have a conversation without any sexual pressure or feeling like
you may step on someone's toes unwittingly.  I'm not saying that Brandon
wasn't sexy, he was undeniably so.  However, he wasn't an option for me, so
there was none of that sexual overtone.  He also had this wonderful quality
of not judging people and making every opinion feel perfectly valid whether
he agrees or not.

     We talked like this for about a half-hour when the hot-tub became too
warm for me and I hopped out.  I stood right at the edge of the pool
between it and the hot-tub.  In one quick decision I took a deep breath and
dove in smoothly.  I stayed under, moving very little, for a little more
than a minute.  I was looking all around under the lit pool, and exhaling
very little.  I looked up and saw Brandon looking down to make sure I was
all right.  I decided to pop up to show him I was, then I went back under
and stayed for a little while longer.  For the first time in the evening, I
was sad.


Chapter 5: Pondering

When I first dove in and didn't come back, Brandon checked on me; then,
even as I subsequently headed under, he still watched.  Such kindness by
him made me feel terrible.  Here was a guy that was kind, considerate,
talented, sexy, and straight.  I hadn't been looking for a boyfriend very
long, but I can't believe I found a perfect match and it could, nor would
ever be everything I yearned for.  Higher powers play funny tricks like
that, but maybe I should just make the best of it.

     This contemplative mood hit me very suddenly while I swam around
underwater, coming up periodically for air.  I really needed to clear my
head and decide if I could be friends with someone I had such an obvious
infatuation with.  I climbed out of the pool on the opposite end from
Brandon.

     "I'm going to take a stroll along the beach," I said, "You just enjoy
the hot-tub, pool, and everything else.  If you get tired, just find a
place to crash."

     "Thanks, I will."

     I walked down the steps and started towards the water.  I let the surf
run up to me and I started heading along the coastline.  The crescent moon
lightly glittered off of the chill Atlantic I began to examine my
infatuation with Brandon, as well as all it's reasons.  They all seemed
good enough to me.  Then I started to reason out why I shouldn't follow
this course of thought.  Most of those reasons centered on his sexuality
and my disappointment, so they seemed pretty well grounded.

     I was lost deep in thought, and was moving slowly up the beach, so I
didn't even hear Brandon as he ran up behind me trying to catch up to me
five minutes later.

     "Here you go," Brandon said, as he handed me my shirt and a towel, "I
thought you might need this."

     "Thanks.  It is getting a little chilly now that I think about it."
For the first time I let the November ocean breeze nip at my face.  It was
actually bracing, and refreshing, instead of the biting most people felt.

     "Are you all right?  I mean one minute we're chatting along nicely and
the next minute you're out here just talking to the ocean."  His concern
was so genuine and innocent, I just had to let this guy know.  After all,
if I couldn't have Brandon, then I definitely wanted Brandon's friendship.
For me to have that, if I'm honest with myself and all my other friends,
about my sexuality, then I've got to be honest with new friends.  This
wasn't something that I had planned on.

     "I'm . . . I'm," I had to let it out, "I'm just going through some
things right now.  It's kind of weird for me, because this is the first
Thanksgiving I won't be with my family.  In my family Thanksgiving is a big
holiday.  But, I've got my friends, a new family if you will."  I hated
myself, at that moment, for chicken-shitting out like that.

     "Oh, I know how that is," Brandon replied, "It's been the same in my
family for a couple years.  We used to get together and have a huge
Thanksgiving, but some of us moved away or got married or both, and now
it's just not the same.  It's impossible to get all of us back home at
once."

     "Where's your family?"

     "Up in Pennsylvania is where my parents are, but I have two sisters
and two brothers.  One sister is on the other side of Pennsylvania from my
family, so it isn't too much of a haul; the other sister is out at ASU; my
brothers live in New York City and Richmond, Virginia; and I'm down here.
Myself and Jennifer, the one at ASU, are the ones that have the toughest
time getting home."

     "So, you remember how that first disappointing Thanksgiving or
Christmas was right?"

     "Yeah, but I'm not so lucky as you are.  You have a group of friends
willing to stay back and do Thanksgiving with you."

     "Well," I stated, "Now you do.  You are officially invited to spend
Thanksgiving with myself and all of us tomorrow."

     "Oh man, really?  For sure, that is so cool.  You're the best.  I've
never made a friend so quickly and so nice as you."

     "I can't believe that.  Now, let's get back to the house before we
both catch cold."  With that, we turned around and started walking towards
the house.  I was still worried about coming out to Brandon, but we were
even closer friends, so that didn't weigh as heavily as before.


Chapter 5: Telling Truths

     Like I said before, now that we were closer friends, I wasn't worried
as much about the coming out.  As we walked back towards the house I
remembered just a few weeks ago being faced with a similar predicament.  In
that case I felt like I had been a liar to my friends before I told them.
I remembered how much courage it took to do it, but the self-imposed guilt
and shame just lifted away once I had.  Remembering all that renewed my
courage and I was fit to tell Brandon.

     "Here, let's close the hot-tub first and the whole pool area."
Brandon suggested.  So him and I cleaned up shut everything off, and headed
inside.  Just as we reached the door to the house I grabbed Brandon's arm.

     "Listen, before we go inside sleep the night away and have a wonderful
holiday tomorrow surrounded by friends old and new there's something I have
to tell you."  Brandon didn't look the least bit concerned about what I was
going to say, or what I could possibly tell him.  I took a deep breath and
continued, "I'm . . . I'm gay."

     There I had said it, I braced myself for he reaction.  It seemed like
an eternity had passed and then, I realized there was no reaction.  I
thought maybe he didn't hear me, maybe I said it inside and not actually.
"I'm gay, Brandon," I repeated.

     "I heard you, I was just wondering if there was more.  Like, you are a
cross-dresser, you're going to have an operation, you want to have my
love-child, something more."

     "No, nothing more.  Just the simple truth.  I'm gay . . . just plain
gay.  No special sub-culture of gay.  I just wanted you to know because you
are such a great guy and I'd like to be your friend, and you be mine, but
friends need to be honest with one another, so I'm telling you."

     "Well, I think it's fine, and I have a small confession to make also.
I already knew.  I heard one of you girlfriends talk about a few guys here
tonight that would have been perfect for you, if these guys were positively
gay."

     "And you didn't tell me you knew I was gay because . . ."

     "Because it never came up.  We talked about going clubbing together,
family, holidays, studies, interests, but we never did a comparison of
sexual notes.  To me it's a non-issue, because it doesn't change the fact
that you are Evan, a very cool guy."

     I think that was the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.  My
friends all said the same thing when I came out to them, but not with so
much conviction.  Like I said earlier, sometimes there were rifts between
my friends and I, with Brandon, I knew that rift wouldn't be there.  I was
so welled up with emotion that I just felt like bursting inside.  I lust
leaned forward and kissed Brandon on the mouth for being so sweet, but I
let it be too much more than a quick peck, I lingered.  "What have I done?"
I asked myself when the kiss was over.

     "Brandon," I said, "I'm so sorry, you were just so nice and I meant
for it to be a peck, I didn't mean to kiss you like that.  Oh, what have I
done?"  I searched Brandon's eyes for answers, but as usual, he was cool as
a cucumber.  This time though, there was a sheepishness about him.

     "Evan, to be honest with you, like friends should, I'd been wondering
what it would be like to do that.  I'd been wondering why you hadn't tried
sooner."

     "Did I just hear you correctly?  Brandon, are you telling me, what I
just told you?"

     "Well, not exactly.  I have been straight, but every now and then I
wonder, and ever since I met you at the club that night, I felt something
about you.  I never really found a guy attractive or sexy totally, but you
are totally sexy.  Then I met you, and you are the most likable and
endearing person I have ever met outside of family.  All tonight, that
combination of sexy physically and great personality has had me wondering
what it would be like to kiss you, to date you, to . . . I don't know, to
be with you, as a boyfriend."

     "Well," I said, "Let's take care of that kiss part properly then."  I
pulled Brandon close to me and planted my lips upon his just lightly
kissing him at first as he kissed back.  Then, our kiss got stronger and I
started to taste his lips with my tongue, Brandon again mimicking the moves
letting me lead the kiss.  Then with a little more confidence, Brandon let
loose his tongue upon mine, entering, fully, my mouth.  We hugged each
other tighter and kissed yet more deeply, finally pulling away after a few
minutes.

     "That beat all my wonderings."  Brandon said.

     "Yeah, mine too.  Look, it's getting light out, why don't we just grab
a blanket and watch the sun come up from the dunes?"

     "All right by me.  We could practice that kiss again."

     So we walked down the stairway towards the beach again, grabbing a
blanket along the way.  We sat at the base of a dune and laid back
together, myself resting against Brandon, who was resting against the dune.
Together we held our fingers entwined and watched as the sun slowly crept
up from the ocean horizon.  Soon after, we fell asleep just like that.


<To Be Continued>
<E-Mail: Breakers76@aol.com>
<Website: http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Breakers/7043/index.html>