Date: Mon, 14 Jul 2003 20:06:22 -0700 (PDT)
From: Scotty <niki200sc@yahoo.com>
Subject: College Life: The Professor and Sean, Part 11
The Professor and Sean, Part 11
by Scotty
Disclaimer:
This is a fictional story dealing with love and consensual sexual
activities between males. If you are not of legal age, reside in an area
where viewing such material is illegal, or are offended by homosexuality
and/or homosexual themes, leave this site now.
The characters in this story do not practice safe sex. Remember this is
fiction. You should always use a condom for the your protection and
especially for the protection of the one you love.
The author recommends only safe sex. Be wise and follow safe sex
practices.
Several songs are quoted in this story. The copyrights to these are held by
the artists or their publishers and not by the author. They are quoted as a
tribute to the artist and the piece.
All persons in this story are fictional and any resemblance to persons
living or dead is purely coincidental.
The author retains all rights to this story. No reproductions or links to
other sites are allowed without the permission of the author.
All other disclaimers apply.
We all find treasure in the strangest places; it is the wonder of being
alive.
Scotty
The Professor and Sean, Part 21
i
I followed Sean into the bathroom to the large shower with shower heads
coming from many directions. Sean turned on the water which came flowing
out in all directions. At the very back of the shower was a wide stream of
water which mimicked a small water fall. It was a luxurious feeling to
have the warm water flowing from so many sides.
"Let's not soap up right now, please?" said Sean.
Sean knelt down on the shower floor. He looked up at me with almost
pleading eyes.
"Piss on me, Ry. Piss in my face and all over me. I want this, Ry.
Please."
"Sean, I don't know. I will try. Be patient with me."
I took my soft cock into my hand and let my bladder know that it was okay
to release. A feeble little stream of piss started out of my cock, but as
I relaxed more, the stream got bigger and soon I was pissing all over
Sean's face and back. Suddenly, he opened his mouth wide and started to
take some of the piss into his mouth. Without warning, he took my cock
into his mouth and swallowed my piss as it streamed out of my cock.
Finally my piss stopped and Sean wouldn't take my cock from his mouth, and
his tongue worked magic and I was hard and hot again, and Sean sucked me
until I shot a load down his throat. I started to soften again and Sean
took my cock from his mouth, licked it carefully and then kissed it. He
rose from his knees and kissed me.
"That was awesome, Ry. Awesome!"
Without thinking, I sank to my knees and looked up at Sean. He knew what I
wanted and took his limp cock into his hand and started to piss on my face
and head. It was warm and didn't smell bad at all. I opened my mouth and
took some of his piss into my mouth. There was no unpleasant taste. I
reached for his cock and took it into my mouth and he continued to fill me
with his hot piss. It was a wonderful feeling, a closeness to Sean that I
had not experienced before. His urine stopped and I began to suck his cock
which hardened quickly, I pushed a couple of fingers into his love chute as
I sucked and suddenly he filled me with his hot cum. I swallowed every
drop. It was wonderful!
"That was awesome, Sean. Awesome!"
We finished our shower with sensual washing of each other. Sean's bruises
were disappearing and he didn't cringe when I soaped him thoroughly. After
we rinsed off completely, we walked naked to the whirpool tub where we sat
next to each other and kissed and hugged and relaxed.
"This is so comfortable. My body is beginning to feel like it's mine
again. This is so nice!" said a relaxed Sean.
We stayed in the whirlpool for a little longer, but it was obvious that
Sean was sleepy. I knew I had to get him into bed, this time for some
serious sleep.
"Sean, baby, come on, time to towel off and get into bed. And, baby, this
time for sleep only. You really need some rest and sleep. I broke the
doctor's orders once tonight, but not again. Let's move."
"Wow, if it isn't Professor Taylor. Yes, sir, I will obey. Why? Because
I love you, sir. To bed, to sleep, perchance to dream of you, lover.
That's was a terrible bit of fractured Shakespeare."
"Don't worry, it's obviously because you are sleeply. Listen to this line,
"Goodnight, sweet prince, and flights of angels take thee to thy rest."
Come on, baby. It's time for sleep."
We fell onto the bed. I spooned up to Sean's back, kissed his neck, turned
off the lights. After some initial kissed and feeling, we fell asleep. I
had prayed before dropping off to sleep that Sean would not have another of
his recurring nightmares.
---------------------------------------
We slept very late. It was almost noon when we kissed each other as a
welcome to what we hoped would be a happy day. Sean's birthday was now
only two weeks away. I wondered if the townhouse would be ready so that I
could give him the piano. Interestingly, no one would discuss the
townhouse with me or Sean. Sometime was going on, and we decided again to
'let sleeping dogs lie' rather than upset anyone.
We found our hosts on the deck at the back of the house. Rog was
immediately on his feet and in the kitchen where he prepared a brunch for
us. It was now well after noon. Sean still looked weary. Greg, smiled a
lot at Sean.
"Well, my young man, I guess that you are almost completely recovered from
your injuries? It sounded pretty bad at one point last night, but Rog
discovered that it was love making and not anything else. It inspired us
to some hearty love making. So, I want to thank you for that, Sean." said
Greg.
"Hey, man, don't just thank me. Thank the man who made me scream with
pleasure, your friend and mine, Dr. Ryan Taylor. He is an expert at more
things than Shakespeare. But I won't be more specific than that. I can
attest to his talents, Greg." said Sean with a laugh.
"What Sean doesn't understand is that because he is so horny and beautiful
that I am turned into what he considers the world's best lover. And, by
the way, Greg, Sean is top drawer when it comes to making love. He takes
my breath away and takes me to places I never thought I would go."
"Sounds interesting, but I know that you and Sean are committed. This is
unfortunate for a stud like me." said Greg.
"Who's a stud?" asked Rog as he came out onto the deck.
"Greg says he's a stud and if Ry and I weren't committed he might want to
play around with us, or maybe he means just Ryan." said a laughing Sean.
"If I catch him playing around with anyone except `moi" I will cut off his
nuts and serve them to him in a stew!" said Rog with an enormous smile on
his face.
"Now, honey," said Greg, "don't get yourself upset. Looking and thinking
isn't doing. And by the way, Rog, don't tell me you haven't had some
wandering eyes for these two hotties."
"I will never tell," said Rog, "and you should never ask. You might not
like the answer."
"Enough, enough. We are not available, either of us. We love you guys
more than you can imagine, but not in that way. If we ever decide to
explore sex with other hot guys, you two are at the top of our list. But
for now, we'll just enjoy each other. Right Sean?"
"Right!" said Sean.
"Well, brunch is ready, so into the dining room, grab a plate, help
yourself and then we can come back out here to eat." instructed Rog.
Rog had laid out a wonderful buffet with scrambled eggs, ham, fresh fruit,
cold roast beef, all kinds of salads, beautiful rolls and breads, bacon,
OJ, coffee, tea, soda, and a number of things I can't remember at the
moment. We all fixed our plates and I noticed that Sean was very careful
with what he took. Not only that but he didn't take the quantity that you
would expect a young stud to consume. I would ask him later when we were
alone if he felt okay. He had not looked or acted like himself this
morning. The weary look had not been replaced by the spirited personable
Sean I knew and loved.
After returning to the deck, Greg put on some background music. It was
soothing. We all enjoyed the food, chattng about nothing in particular. I
noticed that Sean didn't even eat the little the he had put on his plate.
He kept looking at me as if he wanted to be somewhere else. I held off
suggesting that we go take a nap for a long time.
After Rog had brought out ice cream and a great chocolate cake, and we had
all filled ourselves with the dessert, I ventured to say that after all
that food, I for one, wouldn't mind a nap. After today, it would be a long
week for both Sean and me back at State. No one objected, so Sean and I
thanked Rog and Greg and left for our room.
I closed the door behind me, and as I did, Sean came into my arms.
"Just hold me, please Ry. Just hold me."
I did as he had asked and I could feel the tenseness in his body. I
stroked his back and kissed him gently on the neck. It was to no avail.
He was still tense.
"Sean, what's the matter, baby? Something is really bothering you. Tell
me about it if you can. If you can't tell me, that's okay, too. I will
just continue to hold you until you feel more comfortable. I noticed you
didn't eat much and you still look weary. It's not like you Sean. I am
worried."
"It's just that I keep having flashbacks. I remember details that I had
forgotten. Like this morning I remember their laughs as they came on my
face. And the terrible things they said about you and me when they pissed
all over me. I know there are other things that I have hidden somewhere in
my subconscious. Ry, it was hell."
"I know it must have been, Sean, and I want to help if I can."
"The only time I don't think about it," continued Sean "is when we are
making love because I am concentrating on you and the pleasure we have
together. If I fall asleep quickly, I sleep well for a few hours. Last
night I woke up in a sweat; I must have had a bad dream. You were
sleeping, so I didn't want to wake you..."
"Sean, baby, wake me. I am your partner and I want to help you. Please,
don't go through anymore of this alone. I want to be with you. Please,
Sean, please."
Sean was kissing me deeply, and I guided him to the bed where I pushed him
onto his back. I opened his shirt and started to suck on his nipples. He
was groaning.
"I will make love to you twenty-four hours a day if it is what you need to
get through this. I want you all the time anyway. Do you want me to fuck
you now, baby?"
"Yeah, Ry, I want a long, long, gentle fuck, something to relax me,
something that will ease some of the horror of that afternoon. Take me,
please, Ry."
I began by kissing Sean as usual, and finally ended penetrating him and
slowly fucking and kissing him. He melted under me and when I came he
came. We lay there in silence. My soft cock plopped out of Sean and he
whimpered. He was so quiet and then I realized he was sleeping. I put my
arm around him and pulled up the bed covers. I raised myself up on my
elbow and gazed at this beautiful man who wanted me as his lover and
partner. I had almost lost him.
I could feel the emotions rising in me, and I became determined not to lose
it. I must have watched my sleeping Adonis for a long time. I began to
get drowsy and laid my head on Sean's chest. I must have fallen asleep
because the next thing I knew Sean was stroking my hair. Neither of us
said anything for a long time.
"Thank you, Ry. I love you."
I took Sean into my arms and kissed him with tenderness and emotion.
"Sean, you are the center of my life. Without you I am nothing. I love
you, too, Sean Kelly."
----------------
Monday morning came too soon. After some kissing and feeling each other,
we took a quick shower. What were we to wear for clothes?
"Rog, could you please come here a moment?" I called loudly down the
stairs. In a few minutes Rog was at the door.
"Is there a problem?" he asked.
"Come on in, Rog. Well, there is sort of a problem. Sean and I don't have
any clothes except what we came in. How can we go to campus with those;
they're dirty and smelly."
"Hey, just check the closet and the drawers in the chest. I think you will
find all you need. Breakfast in ten minutes." and he was gone.
Sean had stood there with a towel around his waist, but as soon as Rog left
he let it drop to the floor. He was as hard as ever and his beautiful cock
was swinging to and fro just begging me to suck it. I dropped my towel,
too, and walked to Sean. I fell to my knees and took his cock into my
mouth and began to suck him like there was no tomorrow. I played with his
asshole and then shoved a finger deep into him. His body stiffened and he
started to moan and I swallowed and took him into my throat. That was all
it took, he started to spurt his morning offering into my throat and mouth.
I swallowed and enjoyed my protein cocktail. I let his cock slip from my
mouth, stood and kissed my baby.
Before I could say anything, Sean was on his knees sucking my hard cock
with all the talent and care he had. He also worked on my hole, getting
two fingers deep into me. His tongue worked magic and suddenly as he took
me into his throat, I shot my morning load into him. I know I was moaning
and shaking. He let my dick slip out of his mouth and stood up. When he
kissed me, he gave me a good helping of my own cum. We then had to hurry
to meet Rog's breakfast time.
When we checked the closet and the dresser, we found all we needed -
everything was new. Before long, and after some fun with which underwear
to wear, we were dressed and ready for the day. I had found a nice pair of
grey trousers, a cream colored dress shirt, a red and blue stripped tie,
and a grey tweed sport jacket. A pair of new shoes make the outfit
complete. Sean had on a pair of nice fitting jeans, a blue knit shirt with
a white collar and his new sneakers. We kissed each other again and said
we were handsome and sexy.
Rog and Greg were waiting for us in the eat-in kitchen. Rog had make
pancakes and ham. There was OJ and fresh ruby red grapefruit. Lots of
coffee for us, and Sean wanted milk. Real Vermont maple syrup added that
final wonderful taste to the pancakes. Our breakfast conversation was
brief as Rog, Sean and I had to leave for campus. Greg would clean up as
he did not have to be to work until later. Before we left, Rog and Greg
gave us each a key to the house. Sean and I were dumbfound-ed.
"Look, you two, until your townhouse is liveable again, this is your home.
Live in it like it is yours. There's always food and drink. If it's warm
enough use the pool. Nothing here is out of bounds. Do you understand
that. We really mean it." Greg said.
"And I second that. Now not more thank yous or any of that shit. Just
enjoy being here with us.
This is a great time for us, too. Having you two live wires around is
good for us. Makes us more romantic. So enjoy."
"Someday I will find a way to repay you for all this kindness." said Sean.
"And I second that." I said. Sean and I then headed to the car and drove
off to the campus.
"Are you nervous, Sean?"
"A little, I guess. Are you?"
"Damn right I am!"
"Don't worry, Ry. Just remember that I love you. If it gets too bad, find
me and we can make love. That will cure us of nervousness." he said
smiling that smile.
"I think that if I wasn't driving, I would jump your bones right here in
traffic and make mad passionate love to you."
"That would take care of my nervousness." said Sean.
We were both laughing and more relaxed than we had been for some time. As
we approached campus, across the road was stretched a banner that read:
'Welcome Back Dr. Taylor and Sean'. I was stunned and Sean was speechless
for a moment.
"My God, Ry, I didn't expect this. Did you?"
"I certainly didn't. Hope there aren't any bands." I said laughing.
There were no other signs of welcoming as we drove into the faculty parking
lot. I knew that I had to kiss Sean before I could let him go on his way.
I stopped the car, reached over, pulled Sean to me and kissed him with one
of our special kisses. I finally pulled aways from him. I heard him sigh
deeply.
"You now what that does to me, Ry. I can't get out of the car until my
cock settles down. How about you?"
"Not going anywhere just yet. My woodie is big and hard. What a pair we
are. Don't you just love it, that we can arouse each other so easily. If
we're not careful we'll be fucking for more hours than we do anything
else." I said.
"Promises, promises!" said Sean.
Soon we were mostly in control of our dicks, so we left the car Sean on his
way to his first class, and I was on my way to Cathy Sorenson's office. I
still was in a turmoil that Sean was not aware of. Where were my classes,
who notified them that all their papers, on which many had hours writing,
were destroyed.
I entered Cathy's office and was greated by a smiling Cindy who jumped from
her desk came to me, hugged me, and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
"Dr. Taylor, I'm so sorry about what happened. It was terrible. You and
Sean are both wonderful people. I don't understand why folks can't just
let you live your lives. Cathy is expecting you, Dr. Taylor. Please, go
right in. And again I'm so sorry for what has happened."
I thanked Cathy for her concern. I knocked at the door and was greeted by
the cheerful voice of Cathy telling me to come in. As soon as I entered
the room, Cathy was on her feet. She gave me an enormous hug and kissed me
on the cheek.
"Ryan, you look pretty good for someone who has been through the trauma you
have. How's Sean doing?" she asked.
"He's doing much better. His problem is that he has been having flashbacks
to the attack. He remembers details which upset him deeply. So far I have
been with him and he tells me about what happened and that helps. I worry
about him here at school. If he has a flashback and I am not with him, I'm
not sure what will happen."
'Look, Ryan, I will make some discrete calls and if he should have a
problem anywhere on campus, you will be notified immediately. If that
happens, just dismiss your class. On a happier note, here." Cathy handed
me a letter. I opened it and found it was a letter from Dr. Williams. In
it he informed me that the board of trustees had decided that I should be
offered tenure at State. I would have 60 days in which to make up my mind.
As a tenured professor, I would be earning $15,000. more than my present
salary. I was almost in shock.
"Cathy, I don't know what to say."
"Just say that you will accept it. You should discuss it with Sean as he
is now an important part of your life. You have sixty days to let us know.
Your know, Ryan, how much I would love to have you stay. But I also could
understand why you and Sean might wish to go elsewhere to start anew. You
know I would give you the highest recommendaton as I am sure the Dean of
Liberal Arts would. And if he was asked, Dr. Williams would also recommed
you strongly. So take you time."
"This institution and its people have been so wonderful to me and Sean. I
would appreciate some time to discuss it with Sean, but now may not be the
time since he is still in the recovery stage.
I really appreicate the 60 days. Now, Cathy, how about my classes. Some
of them I have missed a number times. Who subbed for me? Do the students
know about the ruined papers? I am really anxious about the whole matter."
"For the most part, Cornelia Standson filled in for you. The students know
all the information we thought they needed to know. Ryan, it's pretty well
known on campus that you are gay and that your lover is Sean. Everyone
also knows about the attack. So be prepared for some questions. I would
imagine some of them will be difficult."
"After what happened, a question won't be difficult, but the answer may
be." With that I got up and was preparing to leave.
"One more thing, Ryan. I don't want to embarrass you, but many members of
the staff, professional, custodial, grounds, secretarial, everyone at the
college has been asking about you and Sean and have shown legtimate concern
for both of you. At some point in time I may tell you more, but not now.
Get on to your first class. Good luck. If you need anything, call." I
left Cathy's office and headed from my classroom.
My heart was thumping and the perspiration of expectation was beading on my
forehead.
ii
Ryan's Day
As I walked across campus to my classroom, I noticed how many people whom I
didn't really know, spoke to me offering me encouragement and words of
concern for Sean and me. I was amazed.
I got to my office, and when I checked my mailbox it was stuffed with notes
and letters. There were too many to read now. I would take them home, and
Sean and I could read them together. There were many more stuffed under
the door to my office. Among the notes, one was from the main post office
on campus asking me to stop by as they had mail for me that could not be
delivered.
I had about twenty minutes before the start of my class on Shakespeare's
Women. Angela Stefanno was in that class. I looked through my notes and
rearranged some. I got my complete Shakespeare and made sure that the
speeches from the various plays were marked so that I could find them
without difficulty. Today I would be discussing Gertrude and Ophelia from
"Hamlet" and Lady Macbeth from "Macbeth." The assignment for next class
would be to read Portia's speeches in "Merchant of Venice" and Desdemona's
from "Othello". I felt comfortable about the class. I gathered up my
materials, locked the door to my office and headed for Room 345. I found
it odd that the door was closed, but I guessed some hopeful student thought
I might see it closed and just leave. Sure!
I opened the door, and to my complete amazement, the class stood as one and
applauded loudly. In the midst of all this stood Angela Stefanno, smiling
widely. When the applause subsided, Angela stepped forward.
"Dr. Taylor, we just wanted you to know how sad we all are that your
partner Sean was attacked and that your home was destroyed. You are a fine
man, intelligent, caring and a wonderful teacher. Your private life is
your business, and we support you and Sean. We just wanted you to know
that." and she and the class sat down as one. I was almost without words
and my emotions were high.
"I want you all to know how encourging it is to have the support of all of
you. It makes the awful thing that happened over a week ago a little more
bearable. Sean is much better, but he was in a coma and was badly beaten.
This all happened because he and I love each other. That's not a good
reason for that to happen.
"Loving is a good thing. Hating is an evil thing. Now, if you have any
questions, I will try to answer them. If not, it's time for some talk
about a couple of Shakespeare's women."
There were no questions, so I began the lecture.
------------------------------------------ Seans' Day.
I didn't tell Ryan how anxious I was about even walking across campus to my
first class. I soon discovered that the kids who bothered to stop were all
upset over what had happened to me. They offered support and told me that
we had a right to a life of our own. Somewhat releived, I headed to my
Comp. I class with professor Anne Milne.
I had always felt some strange vibes from her and I wondered what would
happen in her classroom that morning. Everyone was patiently waiting for
Professor Milne. Many in the class offered me their condolences and
support.
Anne Milne swept through the door. The fortyish woman, although a little
too heavy, was actually a very attractive. Her choice of clothes did
little to enchance her appearance. She chose long flowing dresses in
attempt to cover her large body. She had short stubby fingers with bright
red polished nails. Her glasses were too large for her face and made her
look a little like a wise old owl. Her voice was high pitched and squeaky
and seemed not to fit her body style. She always wore shoes that were more
practical than attractive.
She flowed to the rostrum and rummaged through her brief case for papers.
She surveyed the class with a somewhat stern countenance. She coughed,
straightened herself up to her full 5'5" height and spoke.
"First of all, I want to welcome Sean Kelly back to our class. Sean we are
all totally dismayed by the brutality of the attack on you and the total
destruction of Dr. Taylor's townhouse. It is beyond my ability to
comprehend how anyone could hate a person who simply loves another person.
I don't understand it."
I was red faced and I didn't know what to do, so I sat in my chair with my
head down, not looking at anyone.
"Secondly, I want everyone in this class to know that your essays on the
tragedy were the best I have received from you this semester. I was
pleased and amazed at how much of what we have been doing rubbed off on
you. I thought about it for a long time and it finally dawned on me that
when a person has something that really touches them, the are able to write
well about it."
She addressed me directly, "Sean, you cannot imagine the flood of emotion
and concern your experience caused among your classmates."
Again, I didn't know quite what to do, so I flashed one of my smiles that
Ryan loved so much. It seemed to fit the situation perfectly.
"Thirdly, I have taken it upon myself to copy all your essays, and with
your permission, given to me privately, I will hand those essays to Sean."
I glanced around the room and saw many smiling faces. I smiled back, and
then looked back at my desktop.
Again addressing me directly she said, "Finally, Sean, I want you to know
how moved I was with the last essay you wrote for this class. I don't know
that I have ever read an essay from a young person who so completely
understood what real love was and could say succintly and with great
emotion how much they loved their partner."
I was blushing mightily and I could feel the warmth of it on my face.
"The essay was amazing, Sean. Sometime, when things have quieted down, I
would very much like to discuss the essay with you. Frankly, I think you
taught me something about love and the willingness to sacrifice yourself
for the one you love."
Now my emotions were building and I had to swallow hard two or three times
to prevent the tears. I so wanted Ry here with me. I tried to smile at
Dr. Milne and shake my head in the affirmative.
"I applaud you, Sean, not only for the essay, but for the courage that it
must have taken for you to write it and to expose many personal emotions to
anyone. I thank you for your confidence in me."
Jerrod Williamson stood up and started to applaud, and as if by some secret
signal, the class stood, and Professor Milne walked up to my desk, took my
hand and pulled me to my feet as the class broke into wild applause and cat
calls and whistles. I knew I was shaking and was silently beholden to
Professor Milne for holding my hand.
Then Jerrod's voice, raised above the tumult, cried, "Speech, speech!" And
the class joined in the ruckus demand for me to speak. Dr. Milne led me to
the rostrum, stepped back, and still applauding waited for the class to
come to order. The class quieted quickly and sat down.
I felt very alone and wished, no prayed, that Ryan would walk through the
door, take me in his arms, give me one our special kisses, and tell me not
to worry. I heard his voice urging me to "Simply tell the truth and how
you feel. I love you, Sean Kelly." That was all I needed. I faced the
class, took and deep breath and began.
"First, I want to say thank you, Dr. Milne. Your kindess and support means
a great deal to me. And you guys, what can I say, you are awesome. And
you Jerrod, I don't know that I should thank you for getting me into this
speech thing. Dr. Milne, may I have my essay as I would like to use it?"
It took her a moment or two, and then she handed me my essay.
"I want to read some of this to you because it says so many of the things I
want everyone to know about me and my partner. So here goes:
"When I left my home in in a small VT town, I had no idea that I would fall
in love the second day I was here. I had never thought much about falling
in love. I knew I wanted someone to love me because for most of my life no
one had. My parents died in a traffic accident when I was not yet six
years old. I didn't really understand what that meant until I discovered
that those people, my Mom and my Dad, were no longer there to hug me, to
tell me they loved me, to put me to bed, to read me a story, to take me to
interesting and exciting places. There was just an awful vacuum."
I noticed some girls were wiping their eyes, and many of the guys were
looking at the floor. I continued.
"I had to live with my aunt and uncle. Throughout my growing- up years, I
was subject to physical and emotional abuse from my uncle. The worst of it
all was that no one ever again told me that they loved me. I developed the
notion over those long years that I must be unworthy of love. I hid my
emotions, took the abuse, even after visits to the emergency room to take
care of my injuries for which my uncle always had an excuse. I prayed for
the day it would stop, but it didn't stop until I was 15 and my uncle
dropped dead at work. My aunt was not physically abusive, but she almost
shut me out of her life after my uncle's death."
As I looked up from the essay, it was obvious that most of the girls were
now in tears, the guys continued to look down. Only Jerrod looked directly
at me as if he was trying to give me strength to go on.
"My loneliness got so intense that when I was a senior in high school, I
decided that I wasn't worth anything, and that the world would be better
without me. The Prom was coming and I had no money, no clothes and no
girlfriend. I wrote a note explaining all my loneliness and heartbreak and
was prepared that night to hang myself in the garage near the house."
Now there were sobs that were obvious. I didn't know what to do. I looked
at Professor Milne. She smiled and shook her head 'yes'. Jerrod was
smiling, but I saw tears in his eyes, and he smiled and shook his head
'yes', too. So I went on.
"But an angel in the guise of my English teacher, Mrs. Grace Foster came to
my rescue. She asked me to stay after school. When I arrived at her room,
she wanted to know what was the matter. I blurted out the whole story and
cried like a baby. She stoked my hair, but said nothing. I finally
regained my composure. Mrs. Foster went to her desk and came back with
$200. She gave it to me and told me to buy some clothes, go to the prom,
and take my aunt out to dinner."
There was an audible sigh from the class. I was struggling not to let my
voice crack. There was more to tell.
"Then my angel told me that she had submitted my name to a state committee
for scholarships and that I had been selected to receive one that would
cover everything except housing, food, and spending money. I couldn't
believe what happened to me that day. Someone did care about me. And I
knew then that I might not ever be able to repay Mrs. Foster. The only way
I could be sure she knew what she had done for me was to get to college and
do well. I did all the things I was supposed to do, applied here at State
and was accepted as one of the scholarship students. I worked hard to earn
the money for room and board. I took a job a Walgreens so that I could get
some other clothes and have a little cash."
There was a smattering of light applause. Dr. Milne just smiled at me. I
had to go on, to tell them about Ry.
"I wasn't going to go to Orientation Convocation, but Sue Beckman dragged
me along. Thank God for her. I was bored waiting. When faculty marched in
and I saw him, my heart began to beat rapidly and my breathing became
shallow, and I was almost unsteady on my feet. I had to know who he was; I
had to meet him. For reasons, I cannot explain, I fell completely and
totally in love with a man I had never seen and about whom I knew nothing.
All I knew was that I had fallen deeply in love with him, and I assumed I
would be heartbroken to discover he was married or something like that.
Sue wasn't sure who it was, but she thought it was Dr. Blank. I guess
there's no need for a blank now, Dr. Ryan Taylor. As the convocation broke
up, I make my way to the area where the faculty was leaving. I saw him
again walking and talking with a colleague. He walked right past me
without even seeing me. I felt devastated. I made it my mission to find
out all I could about him."
When I looked up this time, I could make out smiles on many faces, and the
guys were now looking at me. Jerrod was grinning at me, and then I thought
he winked at me. I went on reading from the essay.
"I found out who he was, verified it in the Faculty Listing, found his
home, and discoverd he was single. Then I just thought about him all the
time, no matter what I was trying to do, he would suddenly become the
center of my attention. I was going crazy. I tried to figure out a way to
meet him, but I wasn't creative enough to come up with a feasible plan. I
just wanted to talk with him, to be close to him. I went about my life as
best I could. It was two weeks later, and I was working the closing shift
at Walgreens. It was almost closing time and in walked the center of my
dreams."
There was now actual applause from the class and a glance at Dr. Milne with
her ear-to-ear grin convinced me to go on.
"I was the only cashier on duty and I knew he would have to check out at my
register. I was a nervous wreck. What would I say to him? Maybe I could
ask him about his expertise on Shakespeare? I was practically shaking. He
finally came to the counter and placed a bottle Tylenol down. I picked it
up and scanned it. I asked him if he was the Shakespeare expert at State
and was his name Dr. Taylor. He told me he was and asked my name. I
almost couldn't get it out of my mouth. I gave him his change and for some
reason I didn't pull my hand away immediately and as we chatted about his
courses, I felt something kindred to an electric current moving from his
hand to me. He finally said we could discuss his courses tomorrow at
lunch. I was really excited. He invited me to come to his home. He was
about to write his address when I told him I knew where he lived. He
wondered aloud how I knew, and I told him I had checked the Faculty
Register and that I had walked to find it. He started to leave when I told
him I didn't know which townhouse was his. He gave me the number and
left."
The class was now completely involved in my essay. I could tell their
interest was sincere. I even felt a current in the room that sort of told
me the class, that everyone in the room, wanted me to get to know Ry
better.
"I knew when I saw him that he was the person I wanted in my life. I knew
in some astonishingly perfect way that he was the person who would love me
and finally not fear to tell me he loved me. I did not think anything
about homosexuality or society' s reaction, or his age or my age. I knew
one simple sure thing: I loved him, and I knew instinctively that he would
love me too. My boss told me to get the lights and I could leave and he
would lock up before he did the cash out. I turned out the lights, still
thinking about Dr. Taylor. I wondered what I would say to him at lunch
tomorrow. Could I tell him how I felt about him? I imagined he would know
and would tell me he felt the same about me. I cautioned myself not to
hope for anything except for a friendly conversation about his courses."
The class was on the edge of their seats. Dr. Milne had sat down at the
desk. Jerrod was kneeling on his chair, looking concerned. I was feeling
very anxious as I was about to get into some very personal and private
matters. But I had to finish.
"I left the store and began my walk to my dorm. I had only gone a few
steps when I heard his voice asking me if I wanted a ride home as he was
going my way. Did he wait for me to come out of the store? Did he want to
chat with me? Was he interested in me, in a loving way, not in a sexual
way? I ran to his car and got in. I thanked him for thinking of me. We
started out toward campus. He seemed very uneasy. We had approached the
turn to my dorm, and I decided it was now or never. I pressed my leg
against his. He returned the pressure. I looked straight ahead. I
decided to apply more pressure and thankfully he returned it. It was then
I noticed that tears were running down his face. I thought I had upset him
and I told him to pull over and let me out."
The room was very quiet. Many of the students were leaning forward in
their seats concentrating on every word. Dr. Milne had risen from her
chair and was now standing near the windows. Jerrod was still intensely
watching me. I had to tell them what finally happened.
"Dr. Taylor told me firmly that he was not going to let me out of the car.
He pulled into an empty parking spot. He looked at me and told me that he
had fallen in love with me the minute he saw me at Walgreens. He told me
how lonely he had been, how much he needed someone to tell him he was
loved, someone other than his mom and dad. I couldn't help myself, I
reached over and took him into my arms. I told him that everything was
going to be fine that I was there to love him, to care for him, to be his
best friend."
When I glanced at Dr. Milne, I saw that although she was smiling her eyes
were wet with tears. Jerrod also had watery eyes which I couldn't
understand. My essay was almost done.
"I decided that it was now or never. So I asked him if I could go home
with him. He was happy and told me he wanted to ask me to go home with
him, but he worried that he was too old, that I was too young. I decided I
had to shut him up, so taking another great chance, I leaned over and
kissed him on the lips. What happened with that kiss is impossible to
describe. It was simply the thing that convinced me that I had picked my
life mate correctly. He must have felt the same way because he made no
attempt to break the kiss. My whole being melted at that moment. It
wasn't sexual in anyway. It was knowing that finally I had someone to love
who would love me in return.
There was a lot of clearing of throats, and wiping of eyes. I stopped for
a long quiet moment. Jerrod smiled at me again. It gave me the strength
to go on.
"Our life together filled a void in each of our beings. I had learned what
love really is. It is finding someone for whom you would do anything, whose
needs come before yours, for whom you would take ridicule and hatred. I
knew that I would gladly die for Ryan if it meant I could protect him from
harm. But the most important thing I learned is that love is really loving
someone else; I knew it didn't mean as I had thought for so many years that
you had to be loved. I also knew that I had become the partner in an ideal
relationship, where I loved and was loved in return. I no longer existed in
some kind of emotional vacuum; I was now a part of something bigger than me
and bigger than my partner. I had found the love of my lifetime."
"Thank you for listening." I said and walked slowly to my seat.
The silence was deadening. I sat down. It was then that the applause
started, slowly at first, and then rising in a cresendo that became
deafening. It was then I noticed that Jerrod was quietly weeping as were
many others. Dr. Milne walked to me and gave me a big hug. I hugged her
back in appreciation of her support.
"I think," Dr. Milne said, "that we have all learned a great deal today.
The lessons we have learned today are more important than learning how to
write an essay. What we learned today had to do with the important issues
of living. Loving not hating. Caring for someone without regard for
yourself. And knowing what loving and being loved can mean in our lives.
For most of this we can thank you, Sean. You are wise beyond your years.
It is easy for all of us here to understand how it is that you are the kind
man that would be easy to love. Thank you. I think I will call this a
day. No assignment except to think carefully about what you heard and
learned today. Also consider what hatred can do. We all have a right to
love! Okay, get going class."
Many of my classmates came to me and told me how moving the essay was and
how they understood how wonderful it must be to find someone to love. But
it was Jerrod who surprised me most. He came to me and pulled me into his
arms and hugged me tightly to him. I thought I felt him kissing my neck,
but I couldn't be sure. He whispered into my ear.
"You don't know this, Sean, but I fell for you the first day I met you. I
just didn't have the courage to tell you how I felt. God, you are so lucky
to have someone to love you. I wish you only the best. I hope we can be
friends. Frankly, Sean, I still have the hots for you." With that he
turned and walked away.
I stood there in shock. I would have to tell Ry. But now I had to get to
Music Composition, probably my favorite class. Dr. Fillimore taught it so
I knew I would be comfortable there.
-------------------- Ryan returns as narrator.
It had been a long day and I was tired. I was still worried about how Sean
had made out. He hadn't come to my office so I had to assume that he had
done all right. I was putting papers into my brief case when I felt a
presence in my office door. I turned and there was my love, Sean. He just
looked at me and gave me that smile of his and all my guards melted. I
walked to him, pulled him into the room, closed the door, and kissed him
deeply and long.
"I missed you so much today, I almost went looking for you, baby. I didn't
think I could get through the day without knowing that you were safe. I
truly love you, baby."
"I missed you, too, Ry. I wanted you so much to come through the door in
Dr. Milne's class this morning. I wanted you to hug and to kiss me, to
tell me everything was alright. And then, Ry, I heard your voice telling
me to tell the truth and how I felt. Ry, then I heard you clear as a bell
tell me, 'I love you Sean Kelly.' and I was able to go on."
I kissed Sean's forehead and said in a soft soothing voice. "It's true, I
love you Sean Kelly. Now let's go home."
We left my office and began our walk to the parking lot. We hadn't gone
very far before it became apparent that something was going on. The number
of students and staff began to grow and by the time we got to the quad,
hundreds of people were waiting. The applause began and grew in intensity.
Cathy was there. Rog was there. Anne was there. Angela was there. Sue
was there. Jerrod was there. Cindy was there. Pat was there. So many of
my colleagues were there. And students, so many students. And to my utter
surprise, Dr. Williams was there. We just kept walking toward the car. We
turned and waved to the crowd. We were both overwhelmed by emotions. We
got in the car and drove away. We had learned that day that most people
were sorry for what had happened to Sean and were willing and happy to let
Sean and I live our life together.
It had been quite a day!
(to be continued)
I welcome comments about the story. Since a large part of the story is
already written, I cannot make plot changes. Keeping messages to a
reasonable length would be appreciated. You may email me at
niki200sc@yahoo.com.