Date: Tue, 23 May 2006 12:56:38 -0700 (PDT)
From: Scotty <niki200sc@yahoo.com>
Subject: COLLEGE: The Professor and Sean - Book Two - Part 29
The Professor and Sean - Book Two - Part 29
by Scotty
Disclaimer:
This is a fictional story dealing with love and consensual sexual
activities between males. If you are not of legal age, reside in an area
where viewing such material is illegal, or are offended by homosexuality
and/or homosexual themes, leave this site now.
Several songs are quoted in this story. The copyrights to these are held
by the artists and/or their publishers and not by the author. They are
quoted as a tribute to the artist and the piece.
All persons in this story are fictional and any resemblance to persons
living or dead is purely coincidental.
The author retains all rights to this story. No reproductions or links
to other sites are allowed without the permission of the author.
All other disclaimers apply.
We all find treasure in the strangest places; it is
the wonder of being alive.
Scotty
A special `thank you' goes to my editor and proof reader, Wayne. His
contribution is significant and greatly appreciated.
As Sean would say, "He's "Awesome!"
NOTE: If you would like to know when I am posting the next part of the
story, send me an email requesting that I notify you when I post to
Nifty.
The Professor and Sean - Book Two - Part 29
Some background:
The Convocation in the story is the Spring Convocation. At many colleges
it is also called Commencement. For purposes of the story, the
Convocation is a separate happening. It is worth saying that
Convocations are formal affairs and follow certain protocol.
As a writer, I have taken some liberties with the protocol for the
purpose of drama in the story. It is unlikely that a student, even one
who had made a significant contribution to the institution, would receive
an honorary degree. If a chair had been endowed by anyone, it would be
the president of the institution, or the chairman of the trustees who
would make the announcement. In most instances the endowment would
already be known to the college community and to the public.
Hopefully each of you will understand the need in the story to take
exception to protocol. Here is an opportunity for each of you to
practice "suspension of disbelief".
Scotty
-------------------------------
(Ryan narrates)
I was a little troubled by what Sister Mary had said to us as we were
leaving St. Anthony's. Tobias and Ned both seemed like nice kids.
Tobias was the younger of the two and was African American. Ned was very
light complexioned and I assumed was of Norwegian or Swedish ancestry.
Ned was the oldest of the four boys. He was probably nearly thirteen
Although he listened and seemed interested, I wondered if the stories
that we read and told them were too young for him.
Tobias was four or five and was intrigued by every word we uttered. It
seemed to me that he really liked our nightly hugs and kisses. Ned, on
the other hand, seemed wooden when you touched him. Often he pulled away
as soon as we reached to hug him. I knew Sister Mary would not be able
to tell us his history, but I imagined that Ned had been abused in the
most perverted way.
I hadn't spoken much since we left the home, and as I was driving, I
tried to keep my mind on driving. Sean was unexpectedly quiet, since he
usually was a chatterbox after we left the home. I wondered if he was
also thinking about Tobias and Ned. I didn't have to wait long because
he started to talk to me in a nervous, stammering way,
"What are we going to do about Tobias and Ned? They are so unhappy at
St. Anthony's. They need a home, Ry; they need a home. Tobias always
holds on to me because he doesn't want to lose contact. I'm not sure
about Ned. He seems distant, almost hurt. He doesn't smile, Ry; have
you noticed that? Do you think he was abused? I think so. He acts like
he suffered the worst kind; sexual abuse. He's uneasy when we hug him.
Did you notice? I want to ask Sister Mary about him, but I know she
can't tell us anything. We have a big house, Ry. Do you think we
might, well, I guess not. That was a really stupid idea. Forget it."
I smiled inwardly and was delighted that my sensitive lover had felt much
the same as I had. I wanted him to say what he was thinking, not hint at
it and suppose that I knew what he was thinking. So I asked,
"Do you think we might do what? What's a stupid idea?"
Silence!
"Sean, answer my questions."
"Do you think we could adopt them, too. There! It's a stupid idea
isn't it?'
Silence!
"It's stupid, isn't it?" he reiterated.
"A little, but I feel the same way."
"You do?"
"Yeah, and that makes me crazier than your idea."
"Ry, that's why I love you, Hon. You're so good."
"It will be very difficult to adopt them, you know. We haven't even
given any of the agencies evidence that we have been good parents. Also,
they may wonder about five boys, all of whom I suspect have had some
abuse, being together in one family. What would you say if you were on
the committee, Sean?"
"I guess I would say `no'."
"Me, too."
"But I worry about Ned, Ry. He's hurting so much. He's afraid to
love anyone. That's so terrible. I know about that, Ry. I know about
that!"
"Let's proceed with the three boys first. Once that is finalized, we
can think about adopting Tobias and Ned. There maybe some resistance to
our adopting a black child. Be prepared for that."
"If we can bring happiness into their lives, I am willing to put up with
all the shit the establishment wants to throw at me."
"Hmm, no more love making with me, then. You'd smell pretty bad,
Baby," I told him as I laughed.
"Smart ass!" he jeered.
"Nice ass!" I countered.
Laughter, hugs and lovemaking would follow shortly.
------------------------
(Jerrod narrates)
I now knew what happiness was all about. It was about loving someone who
loved you without any outside restraints.
Kevin had certainly loved me, but he was carrying so much baggage that,
although he wanted to be in a committed relationship, he wasn't able to
pull it off.
Not so with Blake. He loved me. Me! The sex was great, but there was
more. It was hard to define, but I knew he not only was my soul mate,
but more than that, he was also my best friend. He was my lover,
certainly; my partner, definitely; my protector, assuredly. It amazed me
how much I loved Blake. I wanted to be with him. I had made love to
him, tasted him, felt him against me, felt him in me and he had deposited
his seed deep within me. He was now a part of me. Just touching him
gave me a thrill I had never known before. It wasn't just sexual; there
was something more to it, a kind of acknowledgment of our melding, our
coupling, our love. I thanked God for Blake.
After our expansive love making, we had showered and dressed. It was
then that I remembered the letter from the attorney's office. I got the
letter and went to find Blake. He was in the kitchen. As soon as I
walked in he came to me, took me in his arms and kissed me with gentle
passion. I could feel myself aroused, as could he, as my hard penis was
now pressing into his thigh. I enjoyed the moment, but then pulled away
just enough to say to him,
"I got this letter today. I haven't even opened it."
"Who's it from?"
"A law firm in Florida."
"You'd better open it, Jer. It's probably important."
Without responding, I opened the envelope carefully. I took Blake's
hand and led him to the sofa in the small living room. We sat together
on the sofa. Before I opened the letter, I turned to Blake and asked
him,
"Blake, I don't want to put any pressure on you, but, well, I am in
love with you. I can't imagine going on without you by my side. I want
you in my life, in my bed, by my side. Am I asking too much too soon?"
He looked at me, his eyes watery with tears he didn't want to show.
First he kissed me gently, just a grazing across my lips.
Then he hugged me tightly to himself and as he held me, said to me,
"Jer, I fell in love with you at the hospital, but I didn't know it
then. The more time I spent with you, the more I knew there was
something, but my idea that I was straight kept getting in the way of my
admitting to myself that I loved you, a man. That was still a problem
until we made love, and it was then that I knew I wanted you as my
partner, as my lover for as long as we lived. I apologize for not
telling you, but I feared you might not feel the same way, that you might
be on the rebound and needed me to fulfill your sexual needs. Now I know
differently. Jer, I love you so much, so deeply that it amazes me."
Tears were running freely down my face now and Blake began to kiss them
away. I whispered a sobbed filled,
"I love you, Blake. I love you!"
We were now a couple, strongly committed to each other and to our mutual
welfare.
"I guess I need to read the letter," I told him. I opened the letter
and began to read it.
"Is it important, Jer? Is it something that we have to take care of
immediately?" For an answer, I handed the letter to Blake.
He began to read aloud,
Dear Mr. Williamson,
This is one of those times when we as attorneys take pleasure in writing
to a new client. I have some very good and important news to share with
you.
First let me express my deep sympathy for the loss of Kevin Reading.
Such a tragic loss is difficult.
Mr. Reading held you in high regard and has made it clear in his will
that certain things were important to him. Here are the particulars:
1. The apartment #111 at 43 Forest Avenue with all its furnishings is
now your legal property.
2. The 2004 Toyota Camry VIN #09D89755XV733 is now your property.
3. You are heir to all of Mr. Reading's belongings.
4. He has established a trust fund for you, which will pay for your
college expenses and provide you with $3200.00 per month for living
expenses. Also included are any extraordinary and unforeseen expenses.
Your health insurance and life insurance are guaranteed. All premiums
will be paid.
5. When you decide to buy a home, funds will be provided for your down
payment, for monthly mortgage payments, and for property taxes. Upkeep
of the home will be covered by a trust for that specific purpose.
6. When you reach the age of 35, the entire principal of the trust will
be yours. Presently the value is approximately $580,000. With prudent
investment strategy, we predict that by your 35th birthday, the value
will approach one and a half million dollars or more. At worst, we
predict a value of $900,000.00
7. All of the inheritance is contingent on your finding a new life
partner. Ryan Taylor and Sean Kelly will be the final judges in this.
They must approve.
Our firm is now in control of this estate. When you are ready to discuss
this further, call us at 555-123-4567. We will explain more of the
details at that time.
Sincerely,
Doltan and Brothers, Attorneys at Law
Everett J. Doltan
"Fuckin' shit!" I exclaimed.
"Absolutely," agreed Blake.
------------------------------------
(Ryan narrates)
Tuesday dawned bright and sunny. Although it was cool for late spring,
its brilliance quickly warmed you, body and soul. Sean had been an
absolute wonder this morning, waking with a smile and the immediate
intent of having torrid sex with me. I did not object.
The day began with this warming and wonderful part of my life. I had to
remind myself from time to time how much different my life would be
without Sean. It frightened me when I did think about it. I couldn't
imagine my existence without him. His love makes me whole, removes me
from the mundaneness of life and elevates me to a wonderful place where I
have learned the real meaning of love and life.
I knew that, with Sean by my side, I would have the strength and love to
face the vagaries of living. With him, no obstacle, no problem we
confronted would prevent our continuing happiness. I knew in a sacred
way that God had intended that we should be together. He has woven our
life tapestries with intersecting images, bringing us together to serve
Him with our lives. Our starting of a family was evidence that we were
succeeding with His plan.
I thought about all this as I prepared breakfast for the two of us, as I
also speculated about preparing meals for five. Right at that moment I
decided we would have a nanny and a housekeeper-cook. I could hear Sean
singing in the shower. It was a pleasure and I had an immense desire to
join him, holding his naked body against mine, as I would tell him of my
love for him. But the bacon intervened. I beat the eggs in preparation
for cooking them to the soft scrambled stage. Sean's singing had
stopped so I knew he was probably getting dressed. I called out to him,
"Baby, you about ready for breakfast?"
"Coming, Hon," came his reply.
I poured the eggs into the heated frying pan and then began to move the
egg mixture around, carefully avoiding having them stick. I was pleased
when Sean put his arms around me and kissed the back of my neck.
"Good morning, stud," he joked.
"Happy that I can fill your needs," I said.
He bit my neck and then sucked on my flesh. He laughed,
"Just marking you, Hon. You're all mine."
I pushed the pan of eggs off the heat, turned and took him in my arms,
kissing him with passion, and then kissing the tip of his nose. He
laughed. I was enchanted. Then the phone rang.
"I'll get it, chef," Sean kidded me. He went to the phone and picked
up the receiver.
"Hello. Yeah, just a minute. It's Jer and he wants the phone on
speaker since he wants us to hear this together." Sean switched to
speakerphone.
"Hey, guys it's me, Jer. Look, I hate to bother you so early in the
morning, but I have some news. I mean, it's great news."
"Well, what's so great?" asked an impatient Sean.
"It's actually two things. First, I got a letter from an attorney in
Florida that outlined what Kevin had set up for me. Ry, he left me
comfortable. I'll go over the details with you later. I was fuckin'
blown away. He did love me in his own way, but he never loved me the way
I wanted to be loved. But that's the past and I have to live in the
present."
"I can understand how you feel about Kevin, but I'm pleased that he
left you enough to show how he felt. That lawyer is one my father
uses. He'll take good care of you. Jer, what's the other thing?" I
asked. There was a decided pause before Jer spoke,
"I want you to know that I am a very happy guy. Blake and I are a
couple. We're in love. Can you believe it? He fell in love with me,
but after I had fallen in love with him. Whatca think of that, guys?"
"Wow!" shouted Sean.
"Jer, if you are happy and Blake is happy, that's what's important. I
hope that you two can be as happy as Sean and I."
"It's important that you know that Blake and I hope that we can be a
couple like you two. If we can do that, then we will be happy. There is
one other thing, though," he told us.
"What would that be?" I asked. Sean looked at me with a definite
questioning look on his face.
Jer finally said, "Everything that Kevin had set up for me I can only
get if I find another lover. But the important thing is that you two
have to approve."
Neither Sean nor I was able to process that quickly.
"Would you repeat that, please?" said Sean.
"Yeah, it's fuckin' strange isn't it. I mean, Kevin must have really
thought you two had a wonderful relationship. I guess he wanted to try
to control who I would pair up with, even if he had to do it from the
grave. Simply put, you two guys have to approve of my choice. My choice
is Blake. We've discussed this, Ry, and if you two don't approve, well
that's okay, because we are going to be a couple anyway, with or without
Kevin's inheritance."
Sean just stared at me, his face reflecting disbelief and admiration. I
felt the same.
"Jer, we can't decide this on the phone. We like Blake; we love you.
Give us some time, and come to dinner tomorrow night with Blake." I
advised him.
"It's a date and Blake agrees. See you then. Bye." The connection
was terminated.
Sean came over and snuggled against me. I could smell his scent and it
was almost intoxicating. We just stood there enjoying the moment. Sean
spoke,
"What do you think of that?" he asked.
"Interesting. Kevin's arrangement surprises me a little. We need to
think about the Jer-Blake relationship. Important at the moment are the
eggs and bacon, which I need to reheat. You put some bread in the
toaster, get some juice poured,and set the counter up for breakfast. I
think I might enjoy a bowl of dry cereal with a banana." Sean began
laughing.
"What's so funny, Baby?
"It's just my dirty mind, Hon. I want a banana, too, but not the same
kind you want." I began to laugh now.
I wondered if we would ever finish breakfast and be on our way to State.
What's next?
--------------------------
(Cathy Sorenson narrates)
I knew it had been a difficult few weeks for Ryan, and I was not pleased
with what Dr. Williams had in mind for the convocation. I had advised
him to the contrary, but he was unwilling to change his mind.
I wondered if Ryan would be amenable to what was about to happen. I
also wondered if Sean would tell him that he was to receive an honorary
degree from State. It was extraordinary that this was happening. I
couldn't help but believe that part of it was the administration chasing
after funding. They had knowledge of Sean's wealth and his generosity.
Could this be their ploy? I hoped not as I held Pres. Williams in high
regard and I doubted he would be party to such a devious plot.
In discussing the matter with Janet she had scolded me, telling me,
"Cathy, don't see more to the event than what is there. Sean is a
remarkable student, and exceptional musician, and a wealthy man. If this
should be a devious plan of the administration, Ryan would be there to
steer Sean in the right direction, if he needed it. But, Cathy, I trust
Sean more than you do, I guess. I think he is intelligent and would
quickly catch on to any devious scheme of the Trustees. Have some faith,
Sweetie."
Now here I was sitting at my desk worrying about something of which I had
no control. I already knew and had been planning with Janet about
retiring from my position at State. But my desire was to see Ryan named
English Department Chair. The only other staff member qualified would be
Amanda Crighton, but she was recently married and I doubted she would
accept if the position were offered.
I knew it was a strange thing for me to be thinking, but I was now of a
mind that the new Chair should be a man. The department had become too
feminized in the last ten years. A growing number of young talented men
would apply and then be interviewed if asked, but often when they saw the
numbers, a good eighty percent female and a tiny twenty percent male,
they would make a hasty retreat from State. That had to change. I
believed that Ryan could bring that about. Anne Milne had confided in me
recently that she was praying that Ryan would be named the new chair when
I decided to leave. She acknowledged Amanda's qualifications, but she
thought she would not be the leader that Ryan would. I agreed.
I knew that I was behaving badly. I also knew that what I was about to
do might be enough of an act of insubordination that I could be fired. I
didn't care. I wanted Ryan to be aware of the "surprise". Not only
would there be some early disharmony among the English staff, but what if
Ryan objected. I dialed his office extension and waited. He answered,
Taylor, here. May I help you?"
"It's Cathy, Ryan."
"What's up?"
"I want to tell you something that I am not supposed to relate to you.
I just think it would be ridiculous to do this without your knowledge.
Ryan, you know how Williams is about things. He has always been the
maverick in the state university system. Well, he is about to strike
again."
"Is it Sean's degree? I already know about that as Sean told me a
short while ago. I know there's something else because Dr. Williams
just about ordered me to march with the administration, refusing my
request to march with the English Department. I think Sean knows what's
going on, but he has not even let on about it," I related to Cathy.
"No, I don't believe that Sean knows about this, although he may.
Again, who knows how Williams will handle anything."
I could hear Ryan get up from his chair and wander about his office as we
talked.
"Cathy, is it something bad, something that I won't like, something
embarrassing?" I moved uncomfortably in my chair and told him,
"Oh, no, Ryan. It's nothing like that. It's an honor, something I
believe you would be happy about. Remember what you did in September at
my urging?"
"I fell in love in those wonderful, now seemingly long-ago times. Then
the trouble, then more happiness. I'm afraid I don't know what you are
referring to, Cathy. Oh, wait a minute. I remember now. I applied for
the English Department Chairmanship. But you're not leaving are you,
Cathy. Please, please don't leave."
I couldn't speak for a while as emotions poured over me and I was
frightened I might cry and be weak. I had to tell Ryan what was
happening. I gathered all my strength and told him,
"I have a serious problem with my health, Ryan."
"Cathy, what does that mean, `serious health problem'?" he asked.
"I have a back problem that can't be fixed. In a few years I won't be
able to walk. I'll be in a wheelchair from then on. Janet and I want
to travel and see the world while I can get around. It will be
difficult, but that's what we want."
"So?"
"Think, Ryan, think"
"No, he wouldn't do that. He couldn't do that. Is he going to
announce that I have been selected Chair and no one on staff or in
administration has interviewed me? Is that it, Cath?"
"I'm afraid it is, Ryan. I have been arguing with him for the last
three weeks. He told me he could hire whomever he pleased and he wanted
you to stay at State. He wouldn't listen to me about the announcement.
He wanted to surprise you. The only other in-house candidate was Amanda
and she backed out when she got married. The outside candidates were
many, but frankly none with your experience and knowledge of State. And
I wanted you, Ryan."
"Good God, Cath, how am I going to handle that at convocation?"
"In your wonderful, humble way. And, Ryan, remember you didn't hear
about it from me."
"Yes, I understand. Cath, would it be kosher to tell Sean?"
"Lovers have no secrets, Ryan. Tell him, but don't use my name.
Congratulations!"
"Yeah, yeah. Thanks."
Cathy hung up the phone. She smiled and congratulated herself for taking
decisive action. She prayed silently that Dr. Williams would never know.
Across the campus, Ryan Taylor sat stiffly in his chair. He sighed and
wondered what could possibly happen next,
In a few hours he would know.
----------------------------
(Ryan narrates)
I sat alone in my office trying to digest all that Cathy had told me on
the phone. I wasn't doing a very good job at it. How could I be named
department chair and yet never been interviewed. I supposed that I was
well known by Dr. Williams, but even so. Then I wondered if I had ended
up being the only qualified applicant after Amanda had withdrawn.
I guess the thing that irritated me the most was that I had no
opportunity to refuse the position. After it was announced at
convocation, I couldn't do much about it, at least for a year. What if
Sean and I decided to move to the new cabin in Vermont. The rural area
would be a good place to raise the boys. We were financially well off so
we could do what we wanted. That I knew was just fantasy. That was our
summer home, and maybe Christmas and the holidays, but not our home. We
had bought our home, which was near State.
I was confused and angry. What to do? Then there he stood in the
doorway smiling at me. I forgot everything except him.
"Why are you smiling?" I asked him.
"Because you make me happy." he said.
"Come here, Baby. I want to hold you; actually I need to hold you."
"What happened, Hon?" he asked.
"Cathy called to tell me something about convocation. It has upset me.
I can't explain why, but it has."
I pulled him against my chest kissing his curly blond head. He sighed
and began to stroke my arm. I was comfortable, as was he. For some time
we just hugged each other in silence. He pulled away from me and looked
at me with tenderness and love.
"Do you want to tell me about it now? Or would it be better to just
wait until you're ready to share it with me?" he murmured.
"Cathy said Dr. Williams is going to announce that I will be the new
department chair in English when Cath retires, which she plans to do at
the end of this school year. I don't understand how he can do that
without asking me if I want the job." I complained to him.
"Do you want the job, Hon?" he questioned.
"Of course I do." I said.
"Then I don't understand. What's the problem? I think it's
wonderful. WOW! my husband is the department chair in English at State.
I need to kiss you for that." he chuckled.
"Why are you always right, Baby? I want the job. I would have said
`yes' if I were asked. I should just enjoy it. Right?"
Instead of an answer, Sean kissed me so passionately that my penis began
to rise in anticipation. I wanted him badly, but in bed at home.
"Let's go home, Baby and make love," I told him as we kissed firmly.
And we did.
-------------------------------
(Sean narrates)
After some torrid lovemaking, we got out of bed, but remained naked. We
went to the kitchen and proceeded to prepare dinner. Ry took control of
the chicken, while I worked on the potatoes and vegetables. We would
make the salad together, as that had become a ritual for us.
We seldom ate dinner naked, but for some reason, tonight seemed to demand
that of us. Every time I looked at Ry's beautiful ass, my dick would
jump to show its appreciation.
More than once I wanted to push him over the counter, spread his inviting
ass cheeks, and work my tongue magic on his blinking hole.
I caught Ry looking at me with such intensity that I knew he wanted me
again, too. I smiled at him, using all my sexual `come-ons" hoping, as
I did, that I would entice him into action. It was obvious that he was
interested as his cock began to grow into that magnificent sex tool which
was exclusively mine. He walked to me, pulled me roughly against his
chest, kissed me hard, and told me in uncompromising terms,
"You, Baby, are one hot fucking tease. I am hot for you right now, but
I will wait, and you will learn not to tease a stud like me."
We were both laughing now, and as he stroked my back and finally my ass
cheeks, my cock responded and pushed into his thigh. He dropped to his
knees and instantly my cock was in his throat. He worked it with his
tongue and saliva as his hand pulled on my balls. I was moaning in
appreciation. Stopping abruptly and standing, he looked at me with
hunger in his eyes, reached down and squeezed my now throbbing cock, and
told me,
"Now you wait until later, Baby. Not to worry. Your lover will take
care of all your needs."
I actually gasped because of the intensity of his looks and the hardness
of his cock and body, My sexual energy was at its peak, but I would have
to wait. Ry knew that by making me wait, I would only be that much more
filled with desire later. We were both sexually charged and had been
since afternoon. Since then we couldn't get enough of each other. I
smiled again at him, and said,
"Eat all your dinner, because I will tax you energy in bed later. I
will want you in many ways, so be ready."
Ry just laughed, and we were soon back preparing our meal.
Dinner was a simple meal of roasted chicken breast, baked potatoes, and
fresh green beans. We playfully had made the salad of various greens,
tomatoes, cukes, some summer squash, carrots, and olives. Ry had
prepared a delicious dressing of lemon juice, olive oil, and seasonings.
As we ate, I kept rubbing my bare foot up the inside of Ry's right leg.
Occasionally I would run my toes up to his balls and cock, and he would
gasp or moan. We were having such a wonderful time, both of us hurrying
a little so that we could get to the bed and lovemaking. We had just
gotten the vanilla ice cream and fresh strawberries ready, when the phone
rang. Ry picked up the phone.
"Hello, Ryan Taylor, here," he said. I then noticed that his face
paled. Just a minute. He turned on the speakerphone. Go ahead."
After a pause, I heard a gentle female voice.
"This is Sister Agnes at St. Anthony's. Mr. Taylor, Mr. Kelly, Sister
Mary is at the hospital."
"What's wrong with her?" I interrupted.
"It isn't her, sirs. It's Zachary. His fever got so high, and
nothing we knew how to do would bring it down." I heard myself,
"Oh, God, no, no, no!"
Ry was by my side, hugging me, kissing me gently and telling me to calm
myself and listen to what else Sister had to say.
"Go on, Sister," he said.
"She's there now and wanted me to call you immediately so that you
could get to the hospital as soon as you could. I'll pray for Zachary
and for you."
Ry took over at that moment,
"Thank you Sister; we are on our way." The phone clicked dead. Ry
immediately dialed his parents and quickly told them of the situation.
They asked no questions, but assured us that they would be at the
hospital immediately. All this time I was trying to regain my composure,
but tears were streaming down my cheeks and with difficulty I was holding
back the sobs that were wracking my body. I got no sympathy from Ry, but
firm orders,
"Come on, Sean. Get a hold of yourself. You have to be brave and in
control. Remember, Mom will be there and she has a special connection
with Zachary. You, Dad and I have to be strong for her. Now get dressed
and we're out of here.
From somewhere deep in my being I called upon a strength I did not know I
had, and was dressed and ready to leave in a few short moments.
`What,' I wondered, will we find at the hospital?'
---------------------------
(Ryan narrates)
Our ride to the hospital was quiet and quick. Neither of us said much,
but I suspected that we were both thinking about the same things. What
could be wrong with Zachary? Would we lose him? Why was this happening
to us? We were so happy that our lives were falling into place, our
family was complete. We were waiting only for a minor technical approval
in Family Court. I could see that Sean was in heavy emotional pain and I
wanted to hold him and tell him everything would be okay. But I
couldn't, because I was driving. I didn't have any answers for him and
he knew that, as he didn't ask any questions.
My heart was heavy as I thought of Zachary ill and in the hospital. Why
such an innocent child would have to suffer. I know that Father
O'Rourke would tell all of us that this wasn't God's work. It was
nature and the way life plays out. How Zachary fared in this crisis
would depend on our prayers, but also in a very important way, on the
medical staff who would care for him. I parked in the hospital parking
lot, removed my seatbelt as did Sean, but before he could get out of the
Rover, I took him into my arms, held him tightly, and kissed him gently.
I whispered to him,
"Baby, now that we are parents, we will have to deal with this kind of
crisis and others as the boys mature. Kids get sick and get hurt. This
will happen to our sons and together we must provide for them the
strength and love that will pull them through. I know that I need you
with me to share your strength and love. And I promise that I will be
there to share mine with you. Together, my beautiful lover, we will make
it through. Let's go! We're needed in there."
Before I could pull away, Sean kissed me hard on the lips, and I tasted
the saltiness of tears as they ran down his face and into our kiss. God,
how I loved him. He spoke softly,
"Ry, I love you and will always be there for you. Let's go."
We hurried into the hospital and up to the pediatric area on the second
floor.
--------------------------------
(Sean narrates)
When we arrived at the waiting room in the pediatric wing, we found
Sister Mary sitting, her rosary in her hands, her head bowed in prayer.
We stopped immediately so that we wouldn't interrupt her. She sensed
someone in the room with her and looked up at us. She waved us toward
her as she rose from her chair. She hugged both of us and then spoke to
us, calmly and carefully,
"At the moment the doctors don't know exactly what it wrong with
Zachary. They are very concerned with his temperature, which they have
not yet been able to get under control. It could be something as simple
as a virus or it could be something as dangerous and life threatening as
meningitis. He's not in pain and seems sleepy. For a short while he
didn't respond well, but that has changed. The physicians are hopeful
and encouragied. We will have to wait. That's all I know."
At that moment, Mom and Dad rushed into the waiting room. Mom was ashen
faced and Dad was not smiling as he usually did. Mom came to us and
hugged both Sister Mary and us; Dad did the same.
"What do you know?" asked a concerned Mom. Sister Mary repeated what
she had told us. Mom looked at Dad and something passed between them
which only a couple married a long time would understand. They had
communicated their anxiety and fear. Dad then asked Sister Mary,
"How long has Zach been this way?"
My heart jumped and almost burst when he called him `Zach'. Already a
bond was there, a love of a grandfather for his young grandson. I
noticed for the first time how Mom's eyes glistened, but she maintained
the same dignity and bearing that she always did.
"We noticed the fever about an hour after you left this evening. He
didn't seem otherwise uncomfortable, so we followed our usual procedure
for fever without other symptoms. We gave him baby Tylenol. An hour
later, he was no better, and in fact, his fever was at that time 104. We
also thought he was near to convulsing. I called the ambulance and
hospital and headed here with him. Sister Agnes was to call Ryan and
Sean. I didn't have..."
Sister Mary was interrupted when a very large man in hospital garb came
into the waiting room. He looked like a professional wrestler. He was
at least six feet five inches tall and had a muscular frame. I saw his
huge hands and marveled that he worked with fragile infants.
"Hello, I'm Alexander Kosmos, Zachary's doctor." He didn't wait for
pleasantries or introductions, put spurred on with his report.
"At the moment, we're still not sure what is wrong with Zachary. His
fever has begun to decrease, but we are still not sure what his problem
might be. We have a number of tests to finish and we should have a more
definitive answer for all of you in a couple of hours."
Ry stepped forward and extended his hand to Dr. Kosmos.
"I am Ryan Taylor and this is Sean Kelly, my life partner. This is my
mother and father, and you know Sister Mary. Sean and I have been
approved to adopt Zachary and his two brothers, Jacob and Ethan. We have
to wait for Family Court approval where some technicalities will be
completed. The reason I am telling you all this, Dr. Kosmos, is that I
wondered if we might see Zachary?" he said.
Doctor Kosmos looked at Sister Mary, cleared his throat, and said,
"Since you are not yet the boys parents, I can't give you permission to
see him, but Sister Mary, as the person legally responsible for him could
allow you to see him. That would be up to her to decide. What do you
think , Sister?"
"As far as I am concerned, they are the parents of Zachary and the other
two boys. Family Court is just a place where all the legal papers are
completed. Of course, they all can visit the boy, Doctor."
"Very well, I'll inform the nurses. I will get back to you as soon as
I have something definitive to tell you, Mr. Taylor. I have some duties
to attend to now. Zachary will have some more tests beginning shortly.
You may visit him now, but only for a very short time," he told us as he
quickly left the waiting room.
I had remained quiet during all the time Doctor Kosmos was with us. I
was a nervous wreck. I wanted to see Zachary, and I knew that Mom was
probably even more on edge about it. I went to Ryan and hugged him,
"Thank you for arranging for us to see our son. Let's get to him
before they whisk him away for more tests. Mom and Dad, you have to come
with us, too. And Sister Mary, please accompany us as you know most
about Zachary."
Without answers from anyone, we all hurried to the nurses' station and
asked to see Zachary. Good to his word Doctor Kosmos had made the
necessary arrangements. A young nurse, whose nametag identified her as
Suzanne, told us that we could only stay for five minutes. If we were
very quiet we could all go in together. That is what we did.
Zachary's crib was on the near wall of the Pediatric Intensive Care
area. A large older nurse met us at the door and showed us to his crib.
I gulped as I stared down at my son. He seemed so tiny, so alone. I
leaned in and kissed his brow. Ryan was holding my hand and he kissed
Zachary after me. Mom was next, and the poor dear just couldn't keep it
together, as she kissed Zachary, she began to weep. Dad took her into
his arms and hugged her. Sister Mary stepped forward and put Dad's hand
into hers, then she asked us to hold hands and together say a silent
prayer for Zachary's prompt recovery. That finished, Dad said they
would leave us with our son. Sister Mary agreed and they left.
Ryan and I stood by our son's crib. Emotion rushed through me like
waves breaking on the shore. I whispered to Ry,
"He looks so small, so helpless. And I can't help him, Hon. I'm
useless. Some parent I am." Ry squeezed my arm so tightly that it
hurt. He spoke in a quiet but angry voice,
"I will hear no more of that from you, do you understand? You had
nothing to do with this. He's sick and he's where he belongs. We are
doing the right thing. Now we must wait until we know more. Waiting is
terrible, Baby. I know, because I had that terrible wait when you were
injured. I know the empty feeling, the fear of loss, the awful sense of
impotence. That's normal, but to say you won't be a good parent. I
don't buy that. And to think that you are useless isn't being fair to
yourself. Love him, pray for him, and wait with all of us for news."
"I looked up at Ry and with tears streaming down my face, small sobs
escaping my control, I whispered to him,
"I love you. I love him. I love Mom and Dad. I love Jacob and Ethan.
I love God. Please dear God, let us have Zachary until we are old and
gray and he is grown."
For an answer, Ry gently kissed me on the lips. The duty nurse just
smiled.
----------------------------------
(Gerry narrates)
It seemed like an eternity before Ry and Sean came out of Zach's room to
join us in the waiting room. Ellen was pretty upset by the whole affair
and little I said or did seemed to change her attitude. Sister Mary
spoke quietly with her and seemed to made some inroads. When our sons
finally came into the room, Ellen was on her feet and immediately took a
very shaken Sean into her arms. Now that she had someone to worry about,
her own emotional upset disappeared.
Ryan had come to me and hugged me. I appreciated his concern for me when
he was so upset by everything that was occurring. We walked away from
the other three and out into an adjoining room. I noticed how tired and
drawn my son looked and I didn't like it. Too much and too fast was all
that I could think, but I said nothing. We sat together on the sofa and
he finally spoke,
"Dad, this is terrible. Sean is devastated and doesn't understand why
this is happening to us. I've tried to explain to him that the world
works this way. No one can usually answer that terrible cry, `why'.
But I am worried about him, Dad."
"And I am worried about you, Ryan. You look like hell, if I may say
so. You look like you need some sleep and your color is terrible. Is
there a problem between you and Sean?" I asked.
"My God, no, Dad. Sean and I are deeply in love and want the family.
There are just so many things happening, and so fast. There's the
adoption, the house, the convocation, the trip to Denver, the cabin, my
appointment as department chair..."
"Wait up," my dad interrupted, "what's this about department chair?
When in the hell did this happen? Why didn't your tell your mother and
me?"
I was a little pissed about this whole department thing. Ryan look
surprised and a little hurt. He told me,
"Look Dad, I just learned about it this afternoon. It's going to be
announced at convocation and I'm not too happy about that aspect of it.
I planned to call you and Mom later to tell you, and well, then this
crisis happened. I'm sorry, Dad."
Before I could answer, I saw Dr. Kosmos enter the waiting room. Ryan
also saw him and the two of us hurried in, hoping that we would know what
was wrong with Zachary. As we arrived, Dr. Kosmos was speaking,
"We've done all the tests and we know that it isn't meningitis, or any
other serious or life-threatening malady. We think that Zachary
contracted some type of twenty-four hour flu or flu-like cold, which
caused his temperature to spike as it did. It is presently normal and he
is sleeping. I won't discharge him tonight as I think it prudent to
keep him here where we can watch him carefully. None of you need stay
the night. He'll be discharged tomorrow morning at eleven. Are there
any questions?"
No one spoke, so the doctor said goodnight and left us. Mom and Sean
were hugging as were Dad and I. Sister Mary also hugged us all.
Everyone expressed gratitude that everything has turned out okay. I told
Ryan that Mom and I would take care of seeing that Sister Mary got back
to the home. I urged him to go home and get some rest. He said that he
would. I spoke to Mom who whispered something to Sean. Sean came and
got Ryan and they left. Relieved that they were headed home, we left to
take Sister Mary to the home and then we would be back to the hotel for a
good night's sleep.
--------------------
(Sean narrates)
After the trauma of Zachary's illness and our time at the hospital, both
Ryan and I were exhausted. We didn't talk on the drive home. I was
still wrapped in the experience of our son's possible serious illness
and what that might mean to us and to our family. Ry cleared his throat
and then spoke slowly to me,
"Baby, you did well at the hospital. I know how upset you were, but you
kept it together very well and that helped Mom to deal with it without
getting too emotionally distressed. That was good. I have to say, Baby,
that I am really tired and emotionally drained. Parenting will not be
easy, will it? I mean, I guess I hadn't thought about sickness and that
kind of thing. Had you?"
"I guess not. I mean I knew things were not always going to be
perfect. I know because I experienced some of it only a couple of years
ago. I was the kid, and I had to interact with caring adults and others
who were not so caring. Ryan, are you having second thoughts about the
adoption?"
"No!" he shouted. "No!"
I knew I had asked the wrong question, and I wondered where this would
take our relationship.
"Sean Kelly, how could you think that about me! Of course, I'm not
having second thoughts about the adoption. I want those boys in our
family as much as you do. It's just that I had a realization of how
much responsibility raising the boys was going to be. We can do it and
we will do it right. Because Zachary was sick tonight, I was reminded of
what it meant to be a good parent. Please don't ever doubt that I
don't want the boys as much as you do."
"Ry, will you please forgive me. I don't know what possessed me. I
think I was having the same thoughts as you about the responsibility of
raising the boys. It's going to be difficult at times, especially when
we want time for ourselves, but the boys have to come first. But I want
to do it; even more now that I saw Zachary tonight and knew more than
ever before how much those guys need us, need our caring, need our love.
I am so sorry, Hon, for even thinking for a microsecond that you had
doubts. Can you forgive me, please?" I said.
At that moment, we pulled into the parking lot at the townhouse. I
turned off the engine, removed my seatbelt and turned to Ryan. He sat
quietly looking straight ahead. Slowly he removed his seatbelt, and
turned to meet me face-to-face. My heart was thumping wildly as I
envisioned all kinds of responses from him.
"Come here," he ordered in his roughest, sexiest voice.
I moved to him and he wrapped me in his arms. He looked deeply into my
eyes, and then he kissed me. The kiss made my toes curl, took away my
breath, and caused my sexual anatomy to be highly charged. It was a
long, wet, tongue-filled kiss, and somehow I had climbed over and onto
his lap. I could feel his blood engorged penis against my ass, and I
wanted more of him; I wanted him in me. He held the kiss for a long
time, but finally pulled away from me, smiled broadly and asked,
"Does that answer your question, Lover?"
My body was weak from my heightened sexual stimulation, but I had no
doubt that I was forgiven. I nestled my head into the crook of his
shoulder and sighed deeply as my hands moved across his chest, my fingers
teasing his nipples, which were now hard and erect. Finally he began to
moan and I knew that we would make magical love once we were in our bed.
I sighed again, kissed him gently on his neck, and whispered to him,
"I know I am forgiven. Let's go in and get to bed so that we can make
love and reassure each other that all is well between us. Ry, your cock
is very hard and I love the feeling of it pushing against my ass, but
Lover, I want you in me. Come on, let's get going."
We hurried out of the Rover, and soon were in our bedroom undressing and
excitedly throwing our clothes everywhere. I was down to my thong when
Ry took my hand and wouldn't let me take it off.
"I want to do that. It's my job." he reminded me.
He was standing there only in his boxers, which could not keep his penis
inside. It had broken free through the fly and was standing almost
straight out. His cock was beautiful and large; the bulb-like head a
healthy dark pink; the piss slit, slightly open and glistening with
precum. I thought about his eight and a half inch penis sliding deep
into my rectum. Before I could act, Ry had dropped to his knees and was
pulling down my thong. I stepped out of it and stood naked and erect
before him.
"You are so fuckin' beautiful," he said with emotion and desire.
He licked the head of my cock, removing the substantial precum that was
almost dripping from it. I jumped a little because I was so highly
stimulated that I thought I might not be able to last long.
"Ry, Hon, I'm close already. Please, Hon, make love to me. I want you
in me. Please."
He pushed me onto the bed, where I moved to the center and lay on my
back. He crawled between my legs and picked them up and placed them on
his shoulders, but not before he kissed each toe and licked the sole of
each foot. He licked my balls, exciting me more, and then pushed my legs
back further and apart and was soon making love to my anus. I was wild
with desire. I needed him, now.
"Please!" was all I was able to say.
Ry ripped off his boxers, tearing them into pieces. He reached for the
bedside supply of lubricant, worked some into my pulsating hole and onto
his throbbing cock. Without another word spoken, he moved into position
and pushed forward slipping into me. I moved back against him taking all
of his fuck tool deep into my tight ass. He held himself there while I
moved against his cock, impaling myself on him.
"Oh, Ry, please, please fuck me."
"Whatever you want, Baby, I am here to give it you." he told me as he
began to move with vigor in and out of me, brushing my prostate as he
fucked in and pulled out.
"Yes, yes, yes!" I almost screamed as unbelievable pleasure overtook my
being.
In that instance we melded together as one and we both reached our sexual
high, and from our erect cocks shot load after load of love juice. I was
so moved by his lovemaking that I was crying quietly, knowing that I had
been forgiven and that I was deeply loved. Ryan had begun to kiss me
lustfully, my entire body tingling in response to his lovemaking.
"My good God, Sean, I love you so deeply, so completely. I can't get
enough of you, Baby. Oh, God, God, God! You will always be mine.
Always." he said was firmness and conviction.
In each other's arms, we fell asleep, not knowing what would come
tomorrow. What we did know, and with confidence, was that we had each
other.
All else would happen as we moved through life together.
(To be continued)