Date: Sat, 4 Aug 2012 05:46:36 -0700 (PDT)
From: Rizaldy Bustamante <rizaldysbustamante@yahoo.com>
Subject: Watching from the Sidelines - Chapter 3 - Ending Summer

I wrote this story as a tribute to Wazput's story about Matt, Kris, Corey,
Colt and the Gang.  The gang has been a part of my college life and all I
could say is thank you for continuing it and making the story worthwhile.

This story is about an unseen character that maybe some of us can relate
to. We all know someone has to play in the background. Someone has to be
underneath everything and go unseen. Somehow, someone suffers from afar
when we think everything is okay within eyes reach.

And we all know that there will always be a good story behind another good
story.


Also thanks to Andy and Big D!!!


Watching from the Sidelines
Summer Sidelines
Chapter-3
"Ending Summer"


Life sucks...

That's how most stories start. That's how some hateful unrealistic fantasy
begin. But maybe there's some reason why they suck.  Maybe because behind
that sucking fantasy of them, a wonderful story in the background is going
on. Life sucks, but you have to live with it, and live through it, and find
your life's meaning. Some people would probably think that it's stupid to
feel that your purpose in life is to love someone and live a happily ever
after. Some people might find it funny that being hopelessly romantic is a
suicide in this modern times when all is about sex, drugs and
happiness. But focusing on the previous statement on the first word, it's
just "some" people, it's not "All" people.

So I believe, as long as not all people don't believe in love, I will
continue believing the fact that I will have someone with me someday and
share the dream I have. Old people in Sweden say, "you would not be happy
all the time", but I'd love to think the other term for it, "you would not
be sad all the time". For now, maybe the reason my mind tells me to love
being alone is because it expects that I will have someone to be with for
long in the future. Being all by myself doesn't bother me, I love to have
my time alone. Playing the organ. Reading books. Learning how to cook.
Training martial arts and going online and learning stuff. It interests me
to read because it's funny how other people tried so hard to create
something and other people will learn how to do that stuff easily because
it would then be written in books.

Im here again, alone in my apartment. I just had breakfast and it's been a
really hot morning. I hate the heat. I don't like too much sun. I like it
wet and drizzling, where the sun hides all its glory and all you see are
dark clouds. No people in the streets. That's also one fact I hated when I
learned that the college course I wanted is well served in a school that
endures a hot season. Of course there's also winter here which I really
like. I could've also chose another school but as I've said before. I never
really wanted a high-priced school from afar. My mom told me that education
is the same wherever, and schools don't really make the professional. You
could go to Harvard or so and be a drunkard, addict or a criminal after
graduating. Or you could go to a simple University and strive hard to earn
your profession after graduating.

I sat in front of the organ and flipped the pages of the musicsheets I have
compiled. I was a bit ticked as I couldn't find anything I like.I then
played random notes and just had fun with the keyboard. I then played the
star spangled banner just for the fun of it, and had a giggle when I saw
some guys pretending to raise the flag outside the window. I love how music
affects a lot of people, no, not a lot of people, every people. Music is
such a great gift to humankind and I love how it's free for everyone to
use.

Beeep Beeep Beeep!

My head snapped up from the keyboard and my eyes shot to my phone which was
vibrating in the edge of the organ, then it fell. I was just in time before
the phone hit the floor. "Whew" I said to myself.

'Hey! Cord! Remember me?' It was a text from Toni. I replied to her text
and said that I do remember her.

I was checking on my laptop when she replied.

'Oh good! I'm at the university right now, fixing some stuff...' She
texted.

'Really? Cool. Maybe you'd want to catch up later? 6 PM? Dinner?' I
replied. It would be nice to have her. She is really nice and fun to talk
to.

'Okay! That would be so nice Cord! I missed you!'

'I missed you too Toni! See you later, pick you up at the parking lot where
we met.' I texted back.

I was so glad to hear from Toni. I continued surfing on the net and went to
youtube. This has been a habbit of mine everytime I go online.  I look up
good music from the internet and put it in my ipod and memorize them. It's
been a hobby of mine to collect songs from different parts of the world and
take time to appreciate them.

After about 20 minutes of listening to different versions of "the river
flows in you" on piano, guitar, harp and flute. I came across a title that
intrigued me.  'Wherever you are by southborder' I clicked and listened and
watched the lyrics flash on the screen. After two minutes or so, I was on
tears. I was carried away by the song and how the singer sung it. "The wind
that blows the dove, is the wind that blows my love, hoping it'll find its
way to you, wherever you are."  I listened one more time and clicked
another song again from southborder, "Raindbow". Another inspiring song
caught me so I quickly downloaded the two songs on my Ipod. I was so happy
with the new songs I found and kept browsing to find that David Archuleta
has a cover of the song. I listened to it but decided that I like the
original version better.

I went on a food site where I usually go to look up new recipies. I'd like
to prepare something nice for Toni as it seems to me that she's tired from
the things she's doing in th Uni. There was a lot to choose from but
decided on an Italian recipe and a nice graham cake for dessert. I still
had so much time preparing so I made the graham cake first and topped it
with fruit coctails and then I placed it in the fridge. I prepared the
pasta and the tomao paste. I was so into preparing. When I looked at the
clock it was 5:20PM. I finished the plates quickly and jumped in the
shower. I always want myself in my best appearance. I put on a red polo
shirt, blue shorts and sneakers. I looked in the mirror and liked what I
saw. I tied my hair to a small ponytail to the back as it's just
near-shoulder length.

Going to the university I saw the familiar SUV that was parked a builiding
away from my flat. Another car is also parked that I could swear is the car
of Matt's boyfriend Corey. I hurried to the University lot and found Toni
who was really pretty in her red button up shirt and shorts and sneakers.

"Hey! We match!" She said.

"Yes we do! Funny! So are you hungry? I prepared a lot cause I'm hoping you
are."

"Actually I am. You prepared? You cook? That's so cool!" She said in un
upbeat tone.

"Just a little. So how's your summer going." I asked her as we walked
towards my apartment.

"Boring as ever. I had to help my mom at home." she started telling me how
her summer went. "How about you?"

"Well my parents has to go to my granma to help her with stuff." I didn't
tell her the details.

"Does that mean you stayed here the whole summer? In your apartment? That's
kinda cool." She said.

"Yeah, I redecorated it to give it more excitement. It was fun actually."

"That's nice. Hey! So this is where the gang is staying."

"Huh?" I asked who she was talking about when I realized we just passed the
Kris's SUV. "Oh, yeah, I saw the car yesterday. I think they're moving in
here."

"Great! We'll go there after we eat. I'm so starved." She gigled and looked
at me with twinkle in her eyes. I looked away immediately. 'What's up with
that?' I thought to myself.

"Okay, here we are. I hope you like Italian." I said as I unlocked the
door. My Ipod's still playing in the room and 'Rainbow' by southborder, the
song I just downloaded is playing.

'take a little time, baby
 see the butterflies' colors
 listen to the birds
 that were sent to sing for me and you
 can you feel me
 this is such a wonderful place to be
 even if there is pain now
 everything will be alright
 for as long as the world still turns
 there will be night and day
 can you hear me
 there's a rainbow always after the rain.'

"Oh my God Cord this is so sweet! This is such a cool place! And you keep
it like this all by yourself?" Toni said eagerly.

"Uh, I try to keep it this way." I said a bit shyly.

"And there's an organ. You are full of surprises!"

"Not really, I just use my time alone to learn stuff." I said as I lead her
to the dining table where the plates are ready. "I'll just heat up the
meal."  I placed the serving platter in the microwave and heated up the
food. I took the orange juice from the fridge and poured some for Toni
before getting the pasta.

"Enjoy!" I said as we dug in through the meal.

"This is so good Cord. Fantastic. YOu are such an amazing guy!"

"It's not much. I just follow the steps and with some luck, I made it just
fine." I smiled as I got up and took a slice of the graham cake from the
fridge and gave it to Toni, I got one for myself as well.

"Dessert! Oh! I love this." Toni giggled as she ate the slice.

"Are you full?" I asked her smiling.

"Oh am I? This day is so much fun. I get to hang with you."

"Im happy we could catch up a bit." I said but noticed something weird in
Toni's actions.

"Are you okay Toni?" I asked a bit worried about her.

"I'm okay! No, I'm more than okay Cord. It's just like I'm so much happy
here." She said with the twinkle in her eyes again. "Would you play some
music? I want to hear you play the organ."

"UHmmm, sure. have a seat in the couch, I'll just fix this first." I told
her as I started cleaning the table. I put the dishes in the dish washer
and arranged everything in ther proper places.

I sat in front of the organ and played "Into the West" another one of my
favorites. I started playing and playing and I was really into the
rythm. While playing all I can see in my head with my eyes closed is
Matt. Every time I see the dark, his face will shine out of nowhere. The
moment I saw him some more or less two years ago, is still fresh in my
memory. His hair, his lips, his eyes. The way he smiled. The fear in his
face when he was attacked by the fraternity guy. His kind heart.  I don't
know what's going on with me. I'm at peace by just the thought of him. As I
finished the music I turned to Toni who was looking with watery eyes.

"What's wrong Toni?" I said as I quickly came to her side.

"Nothing. It's just so beautiful and it reminded me of how shallow my
relationships are in the past."

"It's okay."

"Cord?" She asked. I was really getting nervous by the minute.

"UHm yeah?"

"I don't know how to say this but... ohh God." She took in a deep breath
then looked at me in the eye. 'Oh shit no' I thought to myself. Toni leaned
in and kissed me on the lips. It was only for 3 seconds but I was already
shaking with nervousness.

"I'm sorry, I cant help it." She giggled and looked down. "I like you
Cord. I know I may sound desperate but... sigh."

I was still shocked with what happened. 'What am I gonna tell her?' I
thought as she continued staring at her hands on her lap. I didn't want
this to become like this. I gathered all the strength I had to think of
what I was gonna say. It can't be like this. Should I tell her I'm gay? Or
maybe I should tell her that I'm in love with someone else? I closed my
eyes and opened my mouth.

"Toni, I- I....." I started. Toni raised her head and looked me in the
eye. The moment her eyes laid on mine, it changed from happy to sad.

"You like someone else." It was not a question. She stated it defeated.

"No, it's uhmm Yeah but...." I stuttered again.

"It's okay Cord... I know it's all too good to be true. You're so perfect
and I let my guard down.." She took her handbag from the couch and stood
up. "I'm not feeling well Cord. The dinner was great and your playing is
very good. I need to go.. I'm sorry." She said quickly. I could hear the
sadness in every word. She went out the door.

"Toni! Wait! It's not like that! Toni!" I called for her but she was
walking fast away from the apartment. "What have I done?" I asked out loud.

I took out my phone and called Toni but she would not pick up. I called her
again and for the 3rd time her phone was turned off.

'There goes one friend.' I thought to myself. What is wrong with me?
No.. What the hell is wrong with her? Couldn't she tell I'm gay? How could
she think that I'm leading her on? I picked up my phone and dialed Timmy,
it rang a few minutes before he answered.

"Hey! What's up?" Timmy answered.

"Man, I fucked up! Remember the girl I told you about?"

"Toni? Yeah why?"

"We had dinner here at the appartment and then she kissed me dude!"

"Whoa! I didn't know you were hitting two birds Cord! I have no idea you
had it in you!"

"No asswipe! She thought I was hitting on her. I didn't know she felt
something for me." I said waving my hand to the air.

"Oh... Where is she now?"

"She left. She's really hurt. I can tell. What should I do?" I asked really
confused.

"Do you have feelings for her?" Timmy asked. I cant believe he even asked
that.

"Are you stupid? Im Gay! Capital G A Y!" I shouted on the phone. I heard
someone shouted 'Fag!' outside. I looked and see two students one shaking
his head towards the other student who I assume was the one who said fag.

"Just give her time and then try to tell her the truth. You're about to
turn 21. I think it's time you stepped out of the closet. You'll feel much
better if you'd tell people you know. Your parents will still love you. I
know that. Hey! I didn't give a damn, did I?" Timmy said on the other line.

"I'll give it a try. But you know how I am Tim." I said and sighed.

"I know. That's why I'm telling you that it would be good for you if you
outed yourself to the people around you. That might help you feel
comfortable around people."

"I'm just scared shitless of what they are going to say once they knew I'm
gay."

"Fuck them! If they can't see the person in you. Who gives shit on what
they say? Besides, anyone who messes with you don't know who their messing
with." Timmy said on the phone.

"Who?" I asked with a chuckle.

"Well hell they're messing with Mr. Gay Jiu Jitsu slash capoera master!"
Timmy said laughing.

"Hell yeah!" I said laughing with him. We talked a bit longer and then hung
up.

That night I was in my room and thought about what happened. I was really
sad for Toni but I can't pretend to like her. I'm not that kind of
person. I had my laptop beside me on my bed and surfed some more on my
facebook page. I saw one friend request from a classmate I had in Theatre
Arts, Hannah. She was my assistant floor manager then.  I accepted her
request and looked up her pictures. There was one album entitled 'Fund
Raising Calendar Pics'. I opened it and was laughing at the first few
pictures.  They were frat-looking guys. I clicked and clicked and came to
the last picture. 'HOT'! It was the calendar cover and Kris and Corey was
in it with the country boy guy friend of theirs. I felt my cock twitch just
by looking at the picture. Corey was so hot. I didn't know that his half
naked body could make me feel this excited. I started fondling with my dick
and looked at the hot guys in the photo. I was so horny that I imagined
myself going deep inside Corey while I am making out with Kris.

"Oh yeah Corey! Your ass is so tight!" I whispered while stroking my
pulsing 7 and a half inch cock. "Oh fuck yeah!" I shot my load with one
shot hitting my chin. I was breathing heavy and satisfied with jacking
off. I cleaned myself in the bathroom and heard my phone rang.

"Hello who's this?" I answered not looking at the caller.

"Cord? It's your Dad. Listen we need to talk. Your grandma's having a bit
of problem and maybe we would need to transfer here to Sweden."He said in a
serious tone.

"Great dad! Way to drop the bomb on me." I chuckled. Dad is usually a good
joker.

"I'm serious Cord. We will be arranging the papers so we could stay here in
Sweden."

"Dad? I have college.."

"I know, we'll do something about that. You could enroll here.Now I've got
to go. I'll call you back soon. I love you son." Then he dropped the call.

I stayed shock. Sitting on my bed, naked. Still wet from the shower. What
now?


-The End of Chapter 3-


Sorry for the short chapter.. but I guess this will be enough to end Cord's
summer..

Have a nice day. Please do send your feedbacks so that I'd know how you
want Cord's life would be next!

rizaldysbustamante@yahoo.com
rizaldysbustamante@yahoo.com with an 's'!

Take care!