Date: Sun, 22 Jul 2012 23:37:12 +0100
From: Gary Davies <justdave68@hotmail.co.uk>
Subject: Well That Was Unexpected Chapter 22

O.K., the usual warnings apply: This story contains sex between males of
consenting age, and if your state or country does not allow such material
to be read, or you are offended by male-on-male sex and you are under the
age of 18, please leave this story now. Otherwise, enjoy Josh's continuing
journey.

Please help keep this site going by donating what you can.

Written by David S
Edited by Russ J
E-mail justdave68@hotmail.co.uk

Well That Was Unexpected

By Dave S

Chapter 22

plus a little story about me, at the end

I stood for a few minutes thinking about the conversation with Sarah, the
impending interview and the fact I will have to recount the whole
event. The prospect of that less than thrilled me. I walked back into the
dining room where Mom was serving the food to my family.

"Who was that on the phone, sweetheart?" asked mom. "Sarah Watson, the
Assistant D.A. for New York," I told Mom, and the rest of my family,
including Cal, looked on. "I have to go in for an interview so I can give
my deposition of my account of my ordeal," I mentioned. "You okay?" asked
Cal, kissing my forehead. "Yeah, I will be...let's eat," I instructed. "So,
when do you have to do this?" inquired Cal. "The day after we get back," I
told him. We ate our meal, talking about anything and everything, including
the size of the fish caught by Lucas earlier that day.

Afterwards, we settled down in the living room, and, just as mom was about
to talk to us about my upcoming party, Cal's cell phone rang.

"Hello," Cal said.

"Yeah, hi, Jake," he said. I was pleased that he was connecting with his
long-time friend, and, like Travis, I was not threatened by his past, as I
knew he loved me.

"Yeah, sure," he continued.

And with that, he handed the phone to me, and I had a bemused expression on
my face. "What?" I asked. "He asked to speak with you," Cal informed me.

"Hello, Jake," I said, wondering what he wanted to talk to me about. "Yeah,
hi, Josh. Can you speak away from Calumn?" he asked. "Why? What for?" I
inquired. "Please, Josh," he asked, and it had me intrigued, so I walked
out of the room and stood in the hallway.

"Okay, we can talk now," I informed him. "Okay, I don't want to butt heads
on this, Josh, but what's the plan for Saturday?" he asked. I wondered what
he was hinting at. Is he angling for an invite to my party? I was going to
invite him and Travis anyway.

"What do you mean?" I asked. "Birthday party," he got out. "I am assuming
you are throwing one, or do you want me to do it?" he continued. Why would
I want him to sort out my birthday party and how did he know about it
anyway. "Sorry?" I said. "Do you want me to sort it Josh, it won't be any
trouble, I assure you," he said.

"Jake, it's in hand, but thank you for your offer," I said
gracefully. "But, how did you know about it anyway?" I asked.

"Josh, I know when my best friend was turning twenty-one," he said, leaving
me shocked and stunned. How could I have missed that bit of information!
Cal never mentioned his birthday. FUCK!!! How could I have not known when
my intended husband turned twenty-one for crying out loud? FUCK!!! I know I
have been through a lot recently, but he's my lover, my boy friend, my
future HUSBAND. FUCK!!! I feel like shit.

"Josh...Josh, you okay, dude?" Jake asked.

"Jake, I need your help," I asked, hoping he would not hate me for not
knowing.

"Sure, what with?" he asked.

"Everything," I replied. "I didn't know," I declared.

"How could you not know? Calumn always drops very subtle hints," he
informed me. And I went on to explain everything that has happened to me
over recent weeks, and how such things got left on the back burner, so to
speak.

"Okay, I can understand how things got missed, Josh," he said. "Right. We
will adapt your party three-fold if it's okay with you," he said. "Okay,
how? And why three-fold?" I asked. "Your birthday, Calumn's twenty-first,
and your engagement party," he went on. "Travis is a party organiser. I
will rope him into help," he said. "Where is the venue?" he asked. "Here,
my home. It has a huge back yard and a fair-sized pool," I informed
him. "Excellent!" Jake proclaimed, "Give me your cell number. We have to
coordinate ideas and run them by your folks. Okay?"

"Thanks, Jake. I would have freaked out if I had missed it," I said.

"Dude, it's my utmost pleasure to be in a position to help, after my
behaviour to Calumn. So, Josh, you are actually helping me," he said.

"Just to let you know, Jake, he has been more relaxed since you two
reconnected. I think he missed you as much as you did him," I informed
him. "Thanks, Josh, that's really great to hear," he said. "Speak soon,
okay?" Jake said, and then hung up the phone. A smile crossed my face, as I
had no intention of letting Cal know that I know it is his birthday on
Saturday.

"So what was up, love?" Cal asked. "Nothing much. He just wanted to know if
I had a problem with him trying to re-new his friendship with you," I
said. "And do you?" he asked. "No, not in the slightest," I replied. "In
fact, I invited him and Travis for the party," I continued, hoping I--I
mean we--could pull this all together in three days.

"That's great. Thank you," said Cal, kissing my cheek.

...

The next couple of days just came and went, with many covert conversations
between my parents, myself, Jake, as well as Travis, who, to be totally
honest, was amazing. I mean, who else would have thought of a three-tiered
cake with the birthdays on two and our engagement on the third. He e-mailed
me a mock up of how it looked. Stunning was the only way to describe it.

The backyard was being decorated in the afternoon when Mom said, "Cal, why
don't you take Josh out for the day, and get him back here for say, 7pm."
Of course, I already knew the reason for this ruse.

We headed to Boston city centre to look at some of the museums, especially
the ones dedicated to engineering, as we both had a passion for it. We had
both done very well on our first assignment, gaining extra credit for our
solution to the set task.

We had a light lunch when I received a text from Travis, reading, "All
going to plan. Cake is set. See you soon. Trav," the text ended. "Who was
that?" asked Cal. "Just Dale, asking where I was," I lied, but a worthwhile
lie.

We were still sitting in the coffee shop, when someone placed his hand on
my shoulder, shocking me. I turned around, and Kyle and Gary Anderson stood
there. "Hey, Josh," said Gary. "Hey, G.J.," I responded. "Josh," was all
that Kyle said, as he knew that G.J. was not my favourite person, since he
tried to spread the rumours about me.

"You and Aaron still coming tonight?" asked Cal. "Yeah, thanks," said Kyle,
softly. "What's tonight?" asked G.J. "Oh, nothing just some FRIENDS having
a party," I said. "Cool. What time?" asked G.J. I looked at him, surprised
at his response. "You're kidding, right?" I spat out. And Kyle looked to
his friend, as he knew what was coming. "What do you mean?"
G.J. asked. "Gary, you tried to ruin my reputation and have me ridiculed in
high school. Do you really think I was just going to say, `Never mind, have
a drink!'?" I said with venom. "You tried to out me, and if it wasn't for
Todd's threats, you would have," I continued. "And to top things off, you
would have hurt your best friend in the process," I said looking directly
at Kyle.

"Shit, Josh, I was an idiot, okay? For what it's worth, I am sorry," he
said. "I wouldn't hurt Kyle. He is like my brother. Fuck...Look I am saying
this from my heart, Josh. I don't care about the fact you are gay. Look, we
were never friends in high school, but we were teammates, and well, we got
on didn't we?" He went on, "Kyle did not tell me about him and Aaron, and
to be honest it hurt that he wouldn't tell me, for that exact reason, and
we have talked about it." He was on a roll. "I have known Kyle was gay
since we were fourteen, and it never changed anything. In fact, he would
always tell me when he had a date," he said, and this I eventually found
out.

"He told me he hooked up with you, and to be honest I was pleased about it,
for him. It was when I made the stupid mistake of letting Jen know, it got
out of hand. But I quashed the rumour, Josh," he said. "And, yeah, Todd
help persuade me." He giggled at that.

I looked at him, and, yeah, he looked like he was being honest. And the
look on Kyle's face said he was being sincere. I then looked at Cal, and he
just said, "It's up to you, love." I looked at G.J. and said, "Fuck, Gary,
you could have fucked me over, and I could have been hurt. You knew what
most of the jocks were like: fucking rednecks. But, okay, it is supposed to
be a good day, so hell," I started, "Kyle, bring him if he wants to come,"
I said looking at G.J.

"Thanks, Josh, I appreciate it," said G.J.

"I take it this is your boyfriend, Josh?" G.J. asked.

"No, he is not my boyfriend," I replied, and Cal was now wondering why I
said that. "He's more than that. He's my partner for life, and we will be
married soon," I responded. Cal now had his own goofy smile.

"Cal, this is Gary J Anderson, G.J. for short. And G.J. this is Calumn, but
Cal for short.

"Hi, Cal, nice to have met you, and Josh, congrats man," he said while
shaking Cal's hand and mine.

"Yeah, and you G.J.," replied Cal.

"So, Josh, do you still swim?" G.J. asked. "Dude, I was never that good at
it," I replied. "When I get back to fitness I am going to try out for
track," I said.

We talked for about an hour before we said our good byes, and said we would
see them later at the party. Next, we went for a walk around the harbour.

About forty minutes later...

"Babe, it's six o'clock. We should be heading back," Cal said, whispering
into my ear, holding me close to his body. "Okay, we better go then," I
responded, kissing the side of his face.

We drove back, talking about the sites we had seen and ones we have to
visit again, but soon we approached my home, with some guests already
there.

We entered the house with Mom and Dad talking to the Laytons, and Todd
roughhousing with Lucas, the latter begging for help, but receiving
none. "Hey, guys!" yelled Dale, coming in from the living room, which is
where the entrance to the back yard was situated. "Hey, man," I responded,
with a small hug, as he did with Cal. "All set?" Cal asked. "Umm, yeah,"
Dale replied, and I shook my head indicating that Cal was still in the
dark. "Okay, guys when you are ready." With that, we walked into the living
room where the curtains were closed and we pushed them open. A banner was
revealed at the back of the yard reading `HAPPY BIRTHDAY' on it. Cal kissed
me. "Happy late birthday, my love," he said, and I replied with, "OK GUYS
DROP IT!!" and with that, the remainder of the banner unfurled, and the
message read, eventually...

`HAPPY BIRTHDAY'

CALUMN

On your 21st

And also your ENGAGEMENT to

JOSHUA (Happy Late Birthday)

Calumn stood speechless. Then Travis and Jake wheeled out the cake, and he
looked at me and said, "I love you so much," with tears falling from his
eyes. "How? When did...?" I cut him off, "Jake told me. Why didn't you tell
me, babe?" I asked, while softly kissing his lips. "You were hurt, so I
just let it go," he replied. "Not your 21st, babe," I said, still holding
his face close to mine, and soon everybody started singing happy birthday
to him...okay...us.

Cal walked over and embraced Jake, kissing him on the cheek. Jake blushed a
shade of red that I know all too well. Then Cal hugged Travis and kissed
him on the cheek as well. I walked over to Cal, grasped his hand, pulling
it to my lips and saying "Surprise," and he grabbed me and kissed me with
passion in front of God and everybody. I didn't care, I was with the man I
love, and didn't care who saw and what they thought.

"I have a surprise for you, babe," I said, looking direct into his blue
eyes that I get lost in every time I look into them. "Oh yes, and what is
that?" he asked, staring deep into my eyes, trying to read my thoughts.

"We have the house to ourselves after the party. Mom and Dad are going to
the Layton's and Lucas is staying at the Jacksons with Mark and Dale," I
informed him, smiling that tell-tale goofy grin he induces every time.

"So, what are you telling me, love?" he said. I leaned over and whispered,
"I want to feel every inch of you, and I want you to feel every inch of me,
babe." A smile crossed his face and he just said, "I think we can manage
that," and he let out the sexiest giggle you could ever imagine. "Fuck, I
need you, my love. I need you to feed me what you have to give me," I
said. "Christ, it's all yours," he informed me, again kissing me.

The party was perfect. A lot of merriment was had by all. Around 10:30pm
most of the parents left, as did my parents, heading over to the Layton's,
leaving me with some of my closest friends. Soon, they also drifted away
around the midnight hour. Lucas came and hugged me goodnight, as I watched
some of the interplay with Cal and Jake. It was good to see Cal laugh; it
suited him. Soon here we were...12:33am...eventually on our own.

"Time to receive our birthday presents now, babe, preferably in our
birthday suits," I sniggered. He walked over to me slowly, his eyes never
leaving mine. "Have I told you how beautiful you are? And how desirable you
are? And how much I crave you?" he huskily whispered into my ear. "And how
much I love you and your hot body, my love?" he continued. He put his hand
in mine and took me to my bedroom.

"Babe...I want you so bad, but I am nervous. I don't know if my ass can
take it yet...but I want you," I whispered. He slowly removed my clothing,
kissing my body as he went. "Love, I wasn't going to make love to you
tonight, I never want you to have any pain, well...bad pain anyway, from
me," he replied, nibbling at my lobe. "I want you to drive me crazy like I
do you, with your beautiful cock," he sexily whispered. I then flipped him
and started to remove his clothing and tasted my way down his magnificent
body. My `sex-on-legs' was laid out before me to admire and enjoy.  I
looked down on my lover and smiled, as I drank in his body and the look of
lust that appeared on his face.

"Love, what are you grinning at?" Cal asked, and I replied, with a husky
voice, "Perfection babe. Absolute perfection."

I leaned down and softly kissed his delicate lips, gently licking his upper
lip, and tasting his sweat that was there. I moved down his neck and
lightly bit his shoulder, which drew a growl from him. I moved down further
and attacked each of his nipples, concentrating equal amount of time on
each, which, considering how erect his cock was, was doing it's trick, I
thought. That brought a growl of lust from me. I slid further down until I
came face to face with my birthday present, a solid eight inches of it. I
opened my mouth and engulfed his cock into my eager mouth, drinking the
pre-cum that was leaking out, causing him to moan in pleasure and raise his
hips off the bed, forcing me to gag.

"You like that, baby? You like my mouth on your cock? You like?" I
whispered out, before taking him again. "Fuck, you taste amazing," I
continued. "I like my present," I giggled to him. "I want more," I said,
staring into his eyes. On a scale of one to ten of birthdays, this was up
there. I removed my mouth from him and lifted his legs, bringing his knees
up to his chest, giving me a perfect view of his rosebud. I moved in and,
with a little bit of oral stimulation, his hole opened up like a flower
greeting the morning sun. The musk and his scent always have been a turn on
for me and right now was no exception. "Oh, baby, you smell and taste
fantastic," I moaned out, not being able to get enough of him. Nor would I
ever get enough of him.

"Babe, fuck, if you keep doing that...Fuck, yeah...you better stop or I am
going to blow," Cal moaned.

I pulled off him and attacked his mouth, sliding my tongue deep, tasting
his lips and literally cleaning his teeth. I loved this guy with every inch
of my being, and for that I had no doubt. I grabbed the bottle of lube that
we brought with us and liberally poured some on my fingers and his ass. I
first pushed in a single finger, and, as he was as horny as myself, it
quickly became two, and, soon after, three. The emotions and desires were
once again ripping through my body; my wounds and fading bruises were
becoming a distant memory.

"Oh fuckkkkkkkkkkkk," Cal cried out, and I was thankful that my family was
not at home, as this was going to be erotic, and almost the loudest we
could possibly be.

I thrust my fingers deep, deliberately stroking his joy button deep within
his ass. "Oh fuckkkkkkk," Cal screamed out. "Fuckkkkk, Joshhhhhhhhhhhh," he
was hitting the fog of want, need, lust. "Josh, respect your elders. FUCK
ME NOW!!!" he demanded from me. I giggled at his desire to be taken. I
kissed his eager lips and licked the sweet and salty sweat from his brow
and whispered my thoughts to him, "I fucking love doing this to you. I
fucking love you wanting me to do this to you, Cal. I just plain out
fucking love you." Saying these words, I pushed deep into my lover, causing
his body to react.

"Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk...Josh, yeah...ohhhhhhhhhhh, fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk," he
screamed out, as I reamed his ass out with a vengeance. I knew what he
needed, as he knew how I liked it: hard and fast. I, at times, just wanted
to be had, and for Cal, this was one of those times. I started to deep slot
his hole, giving him long, fast strokes, causing his body to tremble. His
words became sluttier the deeper I penetrated him. "Oh yeah...fuck
me...make my ass out...yeah babe...shitttttttttttttttt," he let out. His
words, his need, his want, his carnal lust only drove to spur me on. I soon
had him lying flat on his stomach, spreading his legs up, and lazily
re-entering him with deep, long strokes soon had him emptying his balls
onto the sheet below him.

"Oh fuckkkkkkkkkk, babe...Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
shittttttttt," Cal cried out, as an earthquake ripped through his body,
sending me over the edge, with me shooting hard and deep inside my
lover. "Cal...ohhhhh...S H I T...," I shouted out so loud, my parents down
the block could have heard me.

Soon after, we were done, satisfied and sweating buckets from our exploits,
staring into each other's souls, smiling and kissing gently. "Josh, that
was the greatest birthday present anyone could have given me," Cal said,
kissing my lips. "I expect the returned treatment in a few days, my love,"
I informed him. "It's a date," he responded. And I re-evaluated my previous
thought: this wasn't up there as one of my best birthdays; this WAS my best
birthday, ten out of ten.



To be continued...

Thanks for your encouragement of my writing. You all keep me wanting to
keep Josh's journey going. So keep encouraging me and I
will. justdave68@hotmail.co.uk

Dave

Ok just a little about me, and what has happened to me, I was going to post
as a separate entity, but Nifty does not have a section for this, so if
interested read on, if not, again thank you for reading my stuff.

Okay, guys you have heard a lot of stories of coming out. This is mine, and
all names except mine have been changed to protect me from getting my ass
kicked.



The Truth and Nothing BUT

By David S

I had originally written this as a poem, but thought I would write it out,
treating it as some sort of therapy. I have come out twice. The first time
I was hospitalised. I will go into that; I have told this story to my
friends and they have been like rocks to me. So, here I go...

I first met Steven when I was 16. We were friends first and grew closer. He
was a few months younger than me, and he came out to his parents when he
was 17. I, however, did not have the sort of family that would allow me to
do that, so I avoided it. I knew that I was gay around my 15th birthday,
and it shocked me to hell when the realisation hit.

 My dad is the most racist homophobe you would ever meet. He always sought
the approval of his elder brother on anything. Any sort of back chat from
me, and if his brother was present, a black eye or fat lip from my dad
would arrive, you know to show his brother he was the alpha male in his
household.



So that was reason number one for not coming out. I loved life, and if I
had come out then, I have no doubt in my mind I would have been
killed. Yes, at that time my dad was that bad. He would have taken my being
gay as a personal insult. So, quiet I remained.

Around my 18th year Steven wanted more. He wanted our relationship to be
visible, and he gave me an ultimatum that if I couldn't be honest he
couldn't live the lie that I was becoming. I knew at that time I would have
to be honest and come out to my family. I might lose them, but I would
still have Steven.

I told him I would tell my parents over the weekend. Now, at this stage of
my life, as my grandmother was living on her own, I was spending a lot of
time between her home and my family home. So, I thought before I would
spill all to them I would need some support. I was going to tell my best
friend, Mark, first. I will tell you about Mark before I go further. Mark
could get into trouble in an empty room. I saved his hide from more
beatings than I can remember. One in particular took place in our 17th
year. I was supposed to meet him at the local take away, but he was late.

 I heard a noise from behind the shop and spotted three guys kicking the
crap out of him. I picked up a long pipe and chased them off. Mark was
pretty banged up. He admitted that I saved his life, as they showed no sign
of stopping. Therefore, I thought telling him, he would undoubtedly have my
back...I was so wrong.

We met on a Friday afternoon at my request, and I told him. He looked
shocked, and I told him I intended to tell my parents the following day. He
just said "okay," and stood up and walked out, as he had to get back to
work. I thought little of it at the time, but later on I received a call
asking if I was still going out as usual that night, which I replied I
was. We met at the local bar, and I went to get a round of drinks for Mark
and me, as well as two other friends. Mark shouted at me to leave it, as
our taxi was due. I stopped the drinks order, they finished what they had,
and we headed outside. I went out the door first.

The next thing I remember was waking up in the hospital two days
later. Witnesses had told me that I was hit on the back of the head with a
bottle and all three of my so-called friends had beaten me and beaten me
bad. If it wasn't for patrons of that bar, they say they wouldn't have
stopped. Mark, the person I trusted most, had betrayed me. He told the
police that I had hit on him and he retaliated. Yep, he fucking lied
through his teeth. I saved his life more than once, but this was too much
for him to take. My Mom and Dad never found out, as Mark was my friend from
near my grandmother, and since I spent time between homes, no one asked
about where I was. Cell/mobile phones didn't exist then, so no quick calls
happened.

They were charged with assault, but the times then were so different, all
they got was community service, so as far as I was concerned they got
off. My relationship with Steven quickly deteriorated, and I started to
suffer from depression. I was always outgoing, but that whole incident
knocked me. I began comfort eating to ease my pain; I ballooned to almost
27 stone [378 lbs.], and hid. I hid for years.

I eventually came out to my mom when I was 21, but she told me to stay
hidden, as my dad would hurt me, and I believed that he would, so I did my
sexuality hidden from him. When I was about 22, I heard that one of my
former friends had died in a motorcycle crash, and I attended the
service. Mark and the other one was there. Mark attempted to talk to me,
but I blanked him. His parents saw this and confronted me, I had always got
on with Mark's parents, but they believed him. I put them straight. I had
only ever seen Mark as a brother, and looked after him as such. I never saw
him again until I was 33, walking through Newcastle city centre.

 He was with a woman who I found out was his wife. He asked if I would go
for coffee while she shopped. I did. He tried to apologise, and explain
things. I just rebuffed all his explanations. I reminded him of how many
times I saved his life, and how many times I had been there for him. Then,
the one time I needed him, he failed me. I wished him well with his life
and walked away. I am 44 now and haven't seen him since that day.  The
people at this point who knew me, and I mean me, were My two sister's and
my Brother.

My mother passed away when I was 38. She died of cancer. She had battled it
for five long, painful years, but succumbed to it in October '06. Dad was
left with his brother who lived with them. My uncle had walked out on his
wife 20 years previous when she was diagnosed with cancer. [Yes, lovely
man...not.] This was the guy my dad looked up to. He has since died of
cancer himself. Poetic justice methinks. The only person whom I actually
felt any sorrow for was his Son, I treat him as a brother, and have pulled
him out of some scrapes, also, but I love the kid, he's my brother, not in
Father or Mother, but brother none the less.

But, from the time I was so badly beaten I returned to my favourite piece
of furniture; yep, the closet beckoned. I hid for too long, far too long. I
never had a relationship, and nobody ever asked why the fat guy was single,
so I was well hid, miserable to the point I wanted to end it. Outside,
everyone saw happy, merry, David. But inside, I screamed, I cried, I was
dying.

...

Now the story of how I eventually escaped the closet.

 I went out on a friends' stag night in a place called South Shields, in
the northeast of England. Through the night we hit various bars. We went
into one in particular where all the guys wore no tops and just shorts, and
the girls wore skimpy attire. One guy behind the bar was hot, and despite
being 20 years my junior, I couldn't keep my eyes off him. My friend's
stepbrother noticed and made a comment, "Nice, isn't he?" I shook my head
and just said, "I don't know what you are talking about," and nothing else
was said. Later on in the night, when most of the group had split and
headed off home, there was just a long-time friend, and myself and we went
to a few more bars and eventually a club.

He hit on some girls and they were interested in me, as I had shed a lot of
my weight and at 42 I wasn't bad looking. But I wasn't interested, so I
pretended to receive a phone call from my pretend girlfriend, and proceeded
to have a pretend argument. I was that desperate to escape the possibility
of hooking up with the opposite sex. I created a girlfriend out of thin
air. I made my excuses and left.

I returned home at about 2am. I live just a few doors away from my dad, and
noticed his lights still on. I went to check on him.

 All the things that had happened through the night with the barman and the
hooking up possibilities and the lie of a girlfriend, it just overwhelmed
me. As I sat at my dad's he was watching TV. Well, sort of; he has glaucoma
and his vision is very poor. So, I was sitting and he asked if I was
okay. His brother had gone to bed sometime earlier, and everything just hit
me and I blurted it out, "Dad, I am sorry, but I cannot hide anymore. Dad,
I am gay." He sat silent for the longest time, and I just cried, the relief
of getting those words out was like the world being lifted. I didn't really
care what his response was going to be, if he rejected me, I could walk,
and walk guilt free, and start somewhere new, I had decided a while back if
all else failed, as I was getting so low and depressed, I was going to move
away, and as I said start a new, Manchester would have been my destination,
as it had a vibrant gay scene, and more tolerant people (I hate that word)

He asked how long had I known, and I told him everything, even that Mom
told me to stay hidden. Then he asked why I had waited, and, to be honest,
he had a good question. I explained my opinion of what I thought he would
do, and how I came to that conclusion. "Do you really think I was that much
of a bastard?" he asked, and I replied, "Yes, Dad you were." He just shook
his head. "Dad, you hit me several times for nothing, just to show your
arsehole of a brother you were boss. So, yeah, I knew you would hurt me,
and so did Mom," I added.

We talked about what I had been through and how he treated me growing up,
but he never admitted doing anything other than being a parent. I have
memories, but I no longer dwell on them. I am my father's caregiver and I
do that out of duty. Not love. Certainly not out of respect. I love him,
don't get me wrong. I would look after him, but he hurt me so much when I
was younger, it sticks.

Over the following few months I got brave. I told my friends and I didn't
lose one of them. I get some ribbing now and then, but nothing
malicious. My best friend has been brilliant. I couldn't tell him face to
face--you know once bitten and all that. I took the easy option, I told
him via text, we met up on a Monday as we normally did, I was apprehensive,
but he told me to stop being a fucking idiot, and it was my round, as I
said, amazing.

I eventually met a guy who worked in a local gay bar, called Gary, and we
hit it off straight away. I had gone to meet someone else, but he failed to
show, and Gary met me in another bar. And as I said we hit it off, we
talked, we didn't do the stereotypical gay thing and hopped straight into
bed, we waited, we waited almost two weeks, and it was amazing.

We had a relationship for almost two years until he broke my heart when I
caught him cheating. But, that's a story for another day, and despite that
set back, I am in a better place. I am 44 and gay and out, and the world
knows.

My hobby of writing has offered great therapy and people love my stories,
so if you have read them thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Anyone reading this who knows me, Steven's name was changed, shortly after
we parted he was sadly killed in a cycle accident, and that devastated me,
it took me some time to get over that, I won't post his real name, his
family will know who I am talking about anyway, but I loved him,
Circumstances destroyed that. But never a day goes by that I don't think of
him.

David A Spowart (David S)

To be continued...My life that is

Justdave68@hotmail.co.uk