Date: Tue, 9 Apr 2002 21:39:43 -0700 (PDT)
From: already chosen <alreadychosen06460@yahoo.com>
Subject: Who Would Have Thought Chapter 2

This is a story about two college guys who fall for one another.  If you are
offended by two guys being in a relationship, having sex etc. don't read it.
If you are under 18 don't read it.  If it is illegal to read this in your state,
don't read it.

For those of you who can read this enjoy!

Before I give you all chapter 2, I just want to say thank you to everyone
who sent feedback about the story.  I didn't know if I was going to continue
writing it, but all of your comments definitely gave me the confidence to
continue.  Thanks again and keep sending feedback!

Who Would Have Thought
Chapter 2
By Already Chosen

	There I sat, in my bedroom waiting for what seemed like forever for
Phoenix to call.  The whole time I just went over our conversation at the
Student Center in my head.  I thought of every possible scenario.  Maybe he
was into me, maybe he wasn't, maybe he wanted to set me up with a friend
of his, maybe he just wanted to be my friend.  God, my mind wouldn't stop
going about the whole thing.  Well, at least it was a way to pass the time
until hottie Phoenix called.
	Eventually, I snapped out of my trance and looked up at the clock.  It
was already 11.  I thought for sure he wasn't going to call.  My mood
changed from one of anticipation to one of depression.  There I went
again getting myself all worked up over something that probably wasn't as
big of a deal as I would have liked to have thought.  Just as I was about to
get into bed and go to sleep the phone rang.  I took a deep breath, looked at
the caller ID and realized that it wasn't Phoenix.  It was my best friend
Zoe.  I love her to death and I always have a great time talking to her but
she definitely wasn't the person I wanted to talk to at the moment.
Reluctantly, I answered the phone.
"Hey Zoe. Whats up?"
"Nothin' much babe.  What are you doing?"
"Sitting here being depressed."
"Why?  What's wrong?"
I proceeded to tell her the story.  Knowing me as well as she did, she
just kind of laughed but at the same time tried to comfort me.
"Adam, why do you always do this to yourself?  You meet a random
guy, talk to him for a little while and then plan in your head your wedding and
your life together.  Just let things happen.  There is no use in getting
yourself worked up when the only thing you know about this kid is that he's
cute and gay."
"I guess you're right Zo.  Its just you know how I am.  I can't help it.
I wish I could but I just get myself worked up and want to make something
tiny the most important thing that has ever happened to me."
"Well stop it.  Get over yourself and start living in the now based on
fact, rather than this image you have built up in your head."
That's what I loved about Zoe she wasn't afraid to tell the
truth.  She always knew that no matter how bad it hurt, it was always better
for me to hear what I needed to hear rather than what I wanted to hear.
"Alright Zo, let me go.  I just want this fucking day to be over.  I'll
talk to you tomorrow.  Love ya."
"Love ya too.  'Night sweetie."
"'Night."
I hung up the phone feeling a little bit better, but still not 100%.  I
decided to have a cigarette then hopefully I would be able to sleep.  I
rolled over and looked through the disgusting mess that was my room and
found my smokes.  Thank God, one left.  I lit and inhaled the wonderful
smoke.  I know most people say that cigarettes do nothing more than stress
you out but with every exhale I can feel the stress melting away.  I sat
there thinking and smoking.  Basically, I yelled at myself for being such an
idiot and getting so excited about something so unimportant.  I finished the
cigarette and realized that I really wanted another one.  So being the
nicotine fiend that I am, I got some clothes on grabbed my keys, got in my
car, and headed to the store for another pack of smokes.
It was only a short ride to the convenience store.  I got out, ran in and
asked for a pack of Marlboros.  When I got back to the car my cell phone
was ringing.  It was close to midnight now.  All of my friends knew that I was
a total bitch if anyone called me that late, so I figured it must have been
really important.  I didn't recognize the number and immediately got even
more nervous about who was on the other end.
"Hello."
"Hey Adam, it's Phoenix," he said in a chipper voice.
"Oh, hey what's up?"  I was immediately in a better mood.
"Sorry I'm calling this late, but I got caught up with some stuff after
class.  But, I didn't want you to think I was one of those people that says
they will call and then don't."
"No problem.  I'm actually out getting a pack of cigarettes."  I always
backed down and didn't speak my mind when something bothered me.  It
definitely bothered me that it took him so long to call me.  "I'll just take a
little drive and smoke another cigarette while I talk to you."
"Sounds good."
I ended up driving around for about 3 hours because neither one of us
wanted to shut up.  It seemed like we had everything in common and the
things we didn't have in common we could at least relate to each other about
on some level.  I finally got home wanting to be in my bed more than
anything, but at the same time not wanting to hang up the phone.  This boy
was probably the coolest person I had met in a long time.  We finally got off
the phone and I headed into the house.
My mother was waiting for me in the living room.
"Where did you go?"
"I went to grab a pack of cigarettes."
"For three hours?"
"I decided to take a drive and clear my head."
"What's bothering you Adam?  You are not yourself.  I feel like you
are hiding something from me."
"I'm fine Mom, I swear.  I'm just stressed out about school."
"Adam, I love you more than anything.  You know you can tell me
anything.  Nothing is going to make me love you any less."
"There's nothing to tell Mom.  I'm gonna go to bed.  Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Nothing like ending the night with a not-so-intimate conversation with
my mother.  I hated living at home with my parents.  Every time something
like this happened I regretted the choice I made when I started college.  I
could either go away to school or go to school close to home and get a brand
new car.  Being the car freak I am, I chose the car.  Had I known that I
would be dealing with my queerness I definitely would have chosen to be far
away from my parents.
	It's not that I thought they would disown me by telling them, I
was just so afraid of disappointing them.  I had serious issues with trying to
be what they wanted me to be, rather than what I really was...a flaming
homosexual.  I knew that eventually I was going have to tell them that I was
gay.  I mean I was 21 years old, I could make my own decisions concerning my
life.  It shouldn't have mattered what they thought.  Unfortunately, as much
as I wanted to believe that it was none of their business and they would just
have to deal with it and accept me for me, I knew in my heart of hearts that
it was I who had to accept me for me and until I could do that I would have
to continue having to live life in misery with my little secret.
	The next day I didn't have class with Phoenix.  I did a split schedule,
went to school two days a week and worked three.  I went into work the next
morning tired as hell but nonetheless in a great mood.  When I got to work I
couldn't wait to tell my boss all about my conversation with Phoenix the night
before.
	My boss was a lesbian and probably one of the coolest ladies on earth.
I could tell her everything and sometimes she acted as a mother figure to
me.  Anything I couldn't talk to my parents about, which was pretty much
everything lately, I could talk to her about.  Usually the subject ended up
being boys or coming out to my parents.  She always seemed to know what
was going on in my head before I did.  The minute I walked into work that
Wednesday morning she could tell something was up from the smile on my
face.
"You met a boy didn't you?"
	"Well yeah, kinda.  How did you know?"
	"You've been working for me for how long?  9 months?  And in those 9
months anytime you meet a boy you have the same goofy-ass grin on your
face.  It's like you think you are going to get married or something just
because a hot guy said hello or you talked for five minutes."
	"Oh come on Grace, I know I'm not getting married.  Its just, he is so
hot."
	"Okay okay I guess I'll bite.  Tell me the whole story."
	When I was done spilling my guts about Phoenix the only thing she
really had to say was not to get head over heels too fast and let fate take
it's course.  As far as Grace was concerned, I was way too young to be
worried about a long-term relationship and I should just have fun.  I was
definitely of a different opinion, but it helped to have someone there who
could balance me out.
	 The rest of the day went buy pretty uneventfully.  I got out of work
around three o'clock and headed for home.  Usually, when I get done with
work all I want to do is go home and sleep.  That day though, I was wired.  I
didn't know what to do with myself.  I called Zoe to see if she would go to
the mall with me just for something to do, but she was out.  I sat down in
front of my computer and surfed around a little bit but even that wasn't
keeping me entertained at all.  I just wanted tomorrow to come so I could be
back in class and I could see Phoenix again.  After the conversation we had
the night before I was really starting to enjoy the idea of him being around.
Hell, I would have taken him as a friend or a boyfriend.  I really didn't care
at that point.  I was just amazed by him.
	I finally calmed myself down and realized that tomorrow wasn't going
to come any quicker, so I settled in to do some homework.  This is something
I never did and I was kind of surprised at myself for doing it, but I needed
to do something that would numb my senses.  It was working really well when
Phoenix called again.  I was completely surprised to see his number on the
caller ID but I still tried to remain cool.  I didn't pick up until the third ring
and when I did pick up I tried to sound as nonchalant as possible (I'll admit it
now but I never would have then, I was definitely playing childish games).
He told me that he was bored out of his mind and asked me if I wanted to go
do something.  I told him I just needed to get showered because I was gross
from work and that I would meet him just name the place.  We decided on
The Arrow we figured we would grab a couple beers and play a few games of
pool.
	Right after we hung up, I immediately jumped up from my desk and
ran towards the shower.  I was a nervous wreck.  All I could think about was
what I was going to wear and hoping that he wouldn't make fun of me for my
ridiculous pool skills.  It took me probably 45 minutes to finally decide on my
outfit.  When I look back now I don't know what my problem was.  I mean, I
went to The Arrow all the time and I always wore jeans and a sweater.  It
was such a relaxed place that I had never worried about what I looked like
until that point.  Even after I got dressed in my favorite sweater and my
best-fitting pair of jeans I was still self-conscious about my appearance.
	When I was little I was a really fat.  I'm talking, I weighed 150 pounds
at ten years old and I was only 5 feet tall, so even 11 years and 70 pounds
lost, I was still constantly worried about my appearance.  I wasn't bad
looking by any means.  I was still about 150 pounds and 5'11" so I was
definitely proportionate.  I guess old insecurities die hard.  So, I gave
myself a quick little pep talk and got into my car to make the 20-minute
drive to The Arrow.
	By the time I got there I was still nervous, but I had managed to calm
myself down enough to not make a total ass out of myself.  I walked in the
front door and scanned the few people sitting at the bar.  Off in a corner
was Phoenix, just minding his own business and nursing a beer.  I always
wished I had enough self-confidence to go into a bar by myself and have a
beer.  When he noticed me he immediately got up and came over to greet me
with a huge smile on his face.  He immediately gave me one of the greatest
hugs I have ever gotten in my entire life.
	"Hey Adam.  I was just about to give up on ya."
	"Hi.  I'm sorry I was having wardrobe issues."
	"Uh-oh sounds like I've got a clothes whore on my hands," he said in a
kidding tone.
	"I admit it.  I am definitely a clothes freak."
	"Don't worry about it kid, I am too.  I guess it comes with the
territory."
	I laughed in agreement.
	"Well you wanna play a couple games of pool."
	"Sounds like a plan."
	"Cool."
	We went to the back room where the pool table was and played for
probably 2 and a half hours.  We talked about everything in that time.
Family, friends, coming out, or my lack there of, pretty much anything that
came up.  It was really nice talking to him.  I felt like I could tell him
anything.  Finally around midnight Phoenix decided we should call it quits
since we both had class in the morning.  So we finished out beers and headed
towards the parking lot.
	I was finally relaxed around him but as we approached our cars the
nerves and butterflies came back threefold.  I wanted to kiss him so badly I
could taste it.  My problem was, I was not an aggressor in any sense of the
word, so it was all on Phoenix's shoulders.  We started saying our goodbyes
and then he hugged me, got into his car and drove away.  I got in my car
ready to punch something.  I cursed myself out all the way home for not
growing any balls and just taking the chance and kissing him.  What was the
worst that could have happened?  He could have told me he wasn't interested
and maybe never talked to me again.  Its not like I had known the kid all my
life.  I had just met him two days before.  It wouldn't have been a huge loss.
But still, I just couldn't find it in me to do anything.
	I pulled in my driveway and tip toed my way to my bedroom.  At least I
didn't have to deal with questions from my mother.  I went to bed still
frustrated but at least I knew I would see Phoenix in class in the morning.

Well, there it is, Chapter 2.  Still a little slow moving, but I promise, you will
see more action in chapters to come.  Keep the feedback coming and tell me
what you would like to see happen between Adam and Phoenix.
Alreadychosen06460@yahoo.com