Date: Sun, 17 Jul 2005 12:35:08 -0700 (PDT)
From: Joe Cable <joecable2001@yahoo.com>
Subject: He Found Out
Copyright 2005 by Joe Cable
Dedicated to my buddies and fellow proud cocksuckers at
www.menwhoswallow.net
Comments welcome: joecable2001@yahoo.com
He Found Out
You know, straight guys are always asking what we
cocksuckers get out of giving them blow jobs. From their point of
view, it's a logical question. After all, to most guys, sex is
all about their own dick. They like putting it in warm, wet holes
and getting off from it. And for some guys, if the warm wet hole
happens to be a cocksucker's mouth, that's fine. They can just
kick back and relax while the fag does all the work. Or, if they
feel like it, they can face fuck him until they blow a load down
his throat, letting him know who his sexual superior is
But once they've popped, they are no longer interested in
sex and that's the end of it. They zip up, maybe say thank you,
and move on to something else. So it's not surprising that they
just can't figure out why a guy would get down on his knees, suck
another guy's dick, and then thank him for the privilege.
The problem, of course, is that they can't really understand
sex from a cocksucker's point of view.
Sure, we cocksuckers like to fuck and be sucked, same as all
men, straight or gay. But a true cocksucker loves dick, the Great
God Cock. He needs to worship it and to submit both to it and to
the men who are willing to let him worship theirs. For a
cocksucker, being on his knees, looking up at a hot guy, knowing
he's going to share his manhood with him, is sexual heaven. And
when that cock slides into the cocksucker's hungry mouth and the
guy starts using him for his pleasure, that's beyond heaven.
That's what being a cocksucker is all about.
But, as I said, straight guys just don't get it. And most of
them don't care. They're just glad there are guys available to
take care of them when there's no pussy handy.
Some of them, however, are more curious. They can't just
kick back and be serviced, they have to try to find out exactly
what it is that cocksuckers get from servicing.
And sometimes wish they hadn't.
* * *
I figured out what I was when I was 14 and I started sucking
my best friend's dick for him when he was horny. I've sucked a
lot of cock over the years, but his is still my favorite. Even
now, I often think about it when I jerk off. A genuine seven
inches, cut, with just a gentle curve upwards and at its fattest
around the circumcision scar, it just seemed to slide into my
mouth as though it belonged there. And we both wanted it there a
lot during our high school years. I guess I sucked him off two or
three times a week on average.
And the great thing was we stayed best friends even after I
became his cocksucker. We had a lot in common besides his
beautiful cock and I wasn't a sissy, just queer for dick. In all
other ways I was a regular guy. I still am.
He never let anyone know I was a homo. So I was able to have
a normal life as a teenager, with almost all straight friends,
while still getting the dick I needed from my buddy, even after
he got a girl friend.
But while we stayed best friends, neither of us thought that
I was his sexual equal. He was totally in charge of the sex
between us because he was a man and I was a cocksucker, however
manly I was in all other ways. When he wanted service he would
just unzip and I would give it to him, gratefully. When I wanted
to suck, however, while I could ask I didn't always get. This
seemed natural to both of us.
We went to different colleges and I saw less of him after
high school, but I still serviced him during the summer and
holidays if he wanted a BJ, which he often did. I remained his
cocksucker until he got married and we are still close friends.
By the time I went to college, I'd long since accepted the
fact that being a cocksucker placed me near the bottom of the
male sexual hierarchy. I was totally cool with that, I guess
because my best friend had been cool with it. I had no desire to
change and still don't. I like being a cocksucker, despite the
low sexual status we cocksuckers have. I've always had that
status so it doesn't bother me.
In college I soon found out about the third-floor john in
the library, where there was a glory hole, and the adult
bookstore in the crummy part of town with its video booths.
Soon I was sucking off strangers to get dick and enjoying
the hunt for it. It didn't take me long to figure out who the
other cocksuckers on campus were we'd meet up in places like the
third floor men's room--and we'd get together sometimes and play
around. I enjoyed being with others who liked guys instead of
girls, when I could be completely myself for once. They all knew
I was a cocksucker and they understood why.
But mostly I led a straight life. My roommate throughout
college never knew I was a fag and neither did most of my
straight friends and fraternity brothers.
* * *
After college I got a job and an apartment in New York. I
soon found out that Manhattan is cocksucker heaven and I could
get all the dick I needed at places like J's, down on Ninth
Avenue and 14th Street. It was a backroom bar, with a room set
aside for guys to have sex in when they got tired of bullshitting
up front or playing pool.
The backroom was dark, but not too dark to see. Along one
side ran a bench where cocksuckers could sit and give service.
I'd go there a couple of nights a month, buy a beer, and sit down
on the bench. Before long, someone would be standing in front of
me, undoing his fly, and taking out his meat for me to suck on.
On a good night I'd suck three or four dicks and in between I'd
talk with the other guys on the bench, there for the same thing I
was, and I'd enjoy watching them suck dick when I wasn't busy
taking care of a dick myself.
* * *
About a year after I moved to New York, I met Rick one night
in the laundry room of my apartment building. He had the same
apartment I did, only two floors above me. We fell into
conversation as we waited for the clothes to be done. He was
about my height--six one--and maybe ten pounds heavier, brown
hair and eyes and a really nice smile, with white even teeth. He
was friendly but a bit cocky, probably because he was good-
looking and knew it. Being homo, I naturally wondered what his
dick was like, but didn't think I'd have much chance to find out
as he came across as totally straight.
But I did. The conversation got around to sex as it usually
does when two men are alone and he asked if I had a girl friend.
I told him no but didn't say anything more.
"Well, I've got one," he said. "But she's away a lot on
business. I get so fucking horny sometimes I could scream."
"You can always have a date with Rosy Palm," I offered.
He looked at me quizzically and I made a gesture with my
hand indicating jerking off.
"Oh, yeah," he said, "I do plenty of that, God knows, but it
isn't enough. Sometimes only a nice warm hole will do it. You
know what I mean?"
"I know," I said. "But there are plenty of those around,
especially for a good-looking guy like you."
"She'd kill me," he answered.
I decided to steer the conversation in a promising direction
and see if he picked up on it. "What about using a cocksucker?" I
asked. "No fuss, no muss, no commitment, and a lot better than
your right hand."
He laughed. "Actually, I'm left-handed," he said, "but I
know what you mean. I've always figured that a blow job is a blow
job and if a guy wants to suck my dick, why not let him? As long
as he knows that my dick is all he gets. There was a guy in high
school who was a homo. I let him and a buddy of his suck me a
couple of times when I was really horny. I enjoyed it, tell you
the truth."
"So, try it again, why don't you?"
"Where am I going to find a cocksucker, for Christ's sake?"
he asked. "I'm not going into some fucking gay bar and hang with
'the boys.'"
I went for broke. "You can find one in 12F."
I had told him what my apartment number was, so he
understood immediately. His eyes narrowed, "You a fag?" he asked.
"Yeah, I am. That a problem for you?"
"No, no problem. My younger brother's one too, and he's a
real nice kid. Just likes boys instead of girls for some weird
fucking reason. To each his own."
"Well, if you ever want to try it, give me a call," I said,
taking my laundry out of the dryer and throwing it into the
basket while I gave him my phone number. "I'll see you around,
Rick."
I had a feeling I'd hear from him and I did. Less than an
hour later, the phone rang.
"You really mean it?" he asked.
" Yeah, I meant it."
"You'll give me a BJ and that's it? No expecting me to
return any favors or anything."
"Just kick back and relax. I'll do the rest."
"I'll be down in five minutes," he said, hanging up.
Bingo! It was every cocksucker's dream come true. I was
going to get to suck off a really hot straight guy.
He rang the door bell and I let him in. He was wearing only
a terrycloth robe. "Where do you want me?" he asked.
"Wherever you're comfortable."
He sat down in a living room chair. He undid his robe and
opened it. He was wearing nothing underneath and his dick was
already half-hard. He was obviously totally hot to trot. "Help
yourself, cocksucker," he said, spreading his legs.
I dropped to my knees between them and looked at his dick
for a second. It was about six and a half inches, cut, nicely
shaped, with real nice low hangers just waiting to be licked. I
was going to enjoy servicing this guy, being his cocksucker,
nourishing myself from his manhood. I liked his take-charge
attitude and his seeming lack of hang-ups about using someone
like me to get off. I really like straight guys who know what
cocksuckers are for and aren't afraid to use us for that purpose.
I started off by licking his balls. Straight guys for some
reason regard that as an even more submissive act than sucking
their dick, and it helped make it clear that he was in charge and
that I was just there to pleasure him and for nothing else.
It wasn't long before we were really into it. I was going
all the way down to his pubes on each stroke and he had his head
back against the back of the chair, just taking in the feeling,
enjoying what his dick was doing for him, while I enjoyed what
his dick was doing for me. It was cocksucking the way it's
supposed to be, a man and his cocksucker getting intense sexual
pleasure from the same penis.
After a few minutes, he told me "I'm going to cum, man." I
think he expected me to pull off and jerk him off the rest of the
way, but I kept on sucking.
"Going to cum, man! Right now! Right fucking now!" he
yelled. I felt his dick spasm and the jizz hit the back of my
mouth and slide down my throat. When he had finished cuming, I
let his dick rest in my mouth while he recovered.
"Oh, man," he said after a minute, "That was great. You suck
a lot better than those homos in high school did."
"Practice makes perfect," I told him. "I bet they're a lot
better at it now."
"You think they're still sucking dick?"
"Oh, yeah. Take it from me, once you find out you're a
cocksucker, there's no going back. Even after just one dick, you
got to have more and you can never get quite enough."
"You want to jerk off or something?" he asked. "I don't
mind."
"It's OK. I loved sucking your dick. Thank you for letting
me. I appreciate it."
"Suit yourself, man," he said, wrapping his bathrobe around
himself again, suddenly modest. "And thank you. As I said, that
was a great blow job."
"Anytime."
"You mean that? Can I call you whenever I need some head?"
"Sure. I'd love to be your regular cocksucker."
"And you don't want anything in exchange? You like sucking
dick that much?"
"Yep, I sure do."
"OK, I'll do that." He went to the front door of my
apartment. "See ya," he said and was gone.
* * *
I was pretty sure I'd see him again soon so he could share
his dick with me, and I was right. Two days later he called and I
serviced him again, just like before. Pretty soon it became a
regular thing. When his girl friend, Suzie, was out of town, he'd
call every other night or so after dinner time and come down to
my apartment so I could coax a load out of him.
We never became friends. I was his cocksucker, not his
friend, and I was careful not to try to push the relationship
beyond where he wanted it to go. I enjoyed servicing him and
didn't want to screw it up. If all he wanted was to use me when
he was horny, that was OK by me. That's just part of being a
cocksucker and, as I said, I like being one.
But we'd say hello in the elevator, like any neighbors
would, talk about the weather or last night's ball game or the
latest city-hall scandal while we rode up or down together. After
I'd blown him, sometimes he'd sit around for a few minutes and
accept my offer of a beer, but the conversation never got much
more personal.
Then one night late, about 1:30 in the morning, the phone
rang, waking me up. It was him and I could tell he'd had a few.
He wasn't drunk, but he wasn't entirely sober either.
"Can I come down?" he asked.
"It's kind of late, don't you think? I was asleep."
"I'm real horny and you're my cocksucker, right?"
"Right, I'm your cocksucker. Come on down."
He rang the bell in less than two minutes and I let him in.
Usually we just got down to business. He'd present for service
and I'd go to my knees to give him what he wanted. But this time
he sat on the sofa instead of his usual chair.
"You got a beer?" he asked.
"Sure," I said. I went into the kitchen and got one for him.
Wide awake at this point, I got one for myself too.
I sat down beside him, but not too close, and handed him his
beer. "Suzie out of town again?"
"Yeah, been in Chicago since Sunday, some fucking
convention. Won't be back until Friday."
"And you're hornier than a three-headed billy goat."
"Exactly. That's why I came down to see my cocksucker. So he
can suck my dick until I blow a load." He smiled conspiratorially
at me.
"Sounds good to me. Want to get started?"
"Yeah, in a minute. I want to ask a question first."
"OK."
"What do you get out of it? I mean, what's so fucking great
about letting another guy get off in your mouth, fucking use you,
then just zip up and split, while all you get is sore knees?"
"I enjoy it. Look, I'm a cocksucker. Being on my knees
before a hot guy like you, being granted the privilege (and
cocksuckers really think that it is a privilege) of feeding my
hunger for dick while I service you is incredibly exciting for a
guy like me. I feel whole, complete, afterwards, because I love
dick so much. I love sucking it so much and getting a guy off.
"You know, only another cocksucker can really understand it. You
feeders just need to take your pleasure from us and not worry
about us. A real cocksucker likes being used. Really."
"I guess," he said reluctantly. "What do you do when you're
horny? Just hope I call?"
"I got a couple of other guys I service too. And there's
always J's."
"What's J's?"
"A back room bar."
"What's that?" he asked.
"A gay bar with a room where guys can go have sex with each
other."
"In front of everyone?"
"Yep. Don't worry. Everyone in there is a homo too, so you
can just be yourself. No one will think you're sick, or at least
no sicker than they are."
"Wow," he said, "I had no idea."
He undid the belt on his bathrobe and exposed himself. I
could see that his dick was already hard. He may have been a bit
drunk, but he was ready to go.
I turned towards him, took his dick and balls in my hand and
began to feel him up.
"You get a hard-on when you suck?" he asked.
"Not usually. I'm thinking about your dick, not mine."
"Take your clothes off," he said, "I want to see your dick."
I was only wearing boxers and a tee-shirt so I stripped them
off.
"You got a big cock," he said. "I figured cocksuckers would
have small ones. That's why they need to suck other guys, to make
up for it."
Hard, I knew I was a good inch bigger than he was. Like a
surprising number of cocksuckers, I'm pretty well hung.
I went to my knees and pulled his dick forward to begin
sucking on it. I felt that buzz that cocksuckers feel when we are
on the verge of going down on a guy, the strange mixture of
excitement and gratitude and sexual lust that is so addictive.
"I want to try it," he said.
I looked up at him. His dick in my hand.
"I want to see what you find so goddamned exciting about
sucking dick."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, I'm sure."
I stood up and he awkwardly moved forward on the sofa and
took hold of my cock, which began to get hard as my mind moved
into feeder mode. He leaned forward and took it into his mouth.
He sucked, not very expertly to be sure, for maybe thirty
seconds, before moving back against the back of the sofa.
"Is that all?" he asked.
"It is unless you're a cocksucker."
"Well, I guess I'll let you do the sucking then."
I returned to my usual position between his legs and took
him into my mouth. He had lost none of his hard on, and before
long we were in sync, two guys connected by one dick. He popped
after a few minutes, pulled his robe around him, said thanks as
he usually did, and left.
I went back to bed, wondering what was up with these crazy
straight guys all of a sudden.
* * *
Nothing changed after that night. When Suzie was away Rick
would drop down for a BJ every couple of days, we'd say Hi in the
elevator when we met, and that was about that.
Then maybe six months later, we bumped into each other in
the elevator and he told me he and Suzie had decided to get
married and he was going to move into her apartment a few blocks
away, which was bigger than his. I told him congratulations and
that I'd miss having him in the building.
"I bet," Rick said with a knowing smile and I smiled back.
I gave him one last blow job a few weeks later the night
before he moved out. I was genuinely sorry to see him go. I liked
being his cocksucker and I liked the uncomplicated relationship
we had. He needed to be serviced now and then and I needed to
suck cock. It was as simple as that.
Life went on and Rick slowly drifted into the past. I
developed a couple of other semi-regular relationships with
straight guys and continued going to J's now and then when I was
horny and really needed to do some major cocksucking.
One night I went there about midnight and it was pretty
busy. There were maybe sixty guys in the bar and two other
cocksuckers on the bench in the back room when I sat down, giving
head to guys standing in front of them. It wasn't two minutes
before I was sucking my first dick of the night, a young good-
looking guy named Chris Lobo whom I'd sucked off there before.
I loved the atmosphere at J's on a busy night. Just a room
full of homos like me getting what we needed from each other, the
smell of poppers in the air mingling with the tobacco smoke, the
music pounding, the sense that the "real world" was far, far
away.
As I was sucking off my second guy of the night, someone sat
down beside me on the cocksucker's bench and was soon getting
some dick for himself. I was busy giving service so I didn't pay
much attention to him until my feeder popped. But after the guy
using me had given me his load and zipped up I looked over at the
cocksucker sitting next to me.
It was Rick, going down on a hot Puerto Rican guy with a big
dick and a lot of attitude. The guy was holding Rick's head while
he face fucked him big time, and Rick just took it like a good
cocksucker, submitting fully to the man's lust, allowing himself
to be used as the guy wanted to use him.
Pretty soon the Puerto Rican stiffened and pumped his load
down Rick's throat. "Thanks, cocksucker," he said as he buttoned
his fly and walked off.
I was in shock. This hot straight guy who had used me for so
long when he wasn't getting nookie from his girl friend was in
J's? On the bench? Giving head to PR street trash and loving it?
"Hey, Rick," I said softly.
He jumped slightly and turned to see who was addressing him
by name. His face displayed a quick series of emotions as he
looked at me: puzzlement, recognition, fear, and finally a faint,
sardonic amusement.
"Hey," he said. "How are you, cocksucker?"
"You've joined the club."
He sighed. "Yeah, I'm a cocksucker now just like you. You
were right, you know."
"About what?"
"About never getting enough after you've had your first
dick."
"How do you feel about that," I asked.
He sighed again. "It's OK, I guess. I am what I am. I knew
the next morning after that evening at your place, but I fought
it as long as I could. Then one night I came here. I wanted dick
so much. I needed to suck so badly. Been coming back ever since."
"You cool with being a cocksucker?"
He shrugged his shoulders and looked at me with sad eyes. "I
need dick," he said. "You understand. You're a cocksucker."
Just then a tall Hispanic guy came up and stood in front of
him. "My buddy tells me you know how to take a man's cock," he
said, "That right?"
"Yeah, that's right," Rick said, looking up at him. "I'll
take care of you. Let me suck it. Please?"
The Puerto Rican undid his belt, popped the buttons on his
jeans, and let his big uncut cock and balls flop out in front of
Rick's face. "Go for it, cocksucker," he said, an unmistakable
note of contempt in his voice for someone who would surrender his
own manhood in order to share in his. "Show me how much you need
a real man's dick."
Rick took hold of the guy's cock and turned to look at me
for a second. He seemed almost to apologize to me for his
unexpected fall from the top to the bottom of the male sexual
hierarchy. Then he turned back, leaned forward, and began to suck
obediently on the dick in front of him, the dick that a "real
man" had presented for service.
"Yeah, man," the Puerto Rican kid said, "You like my big
dick, don't you? You need it bad, don't you, cocksucker?"
Rick didn't answer him, but I knew what his answer was. He
was a cocksucker now, just like me.
___________________________________________
Check out my other Nifty stories:
/nifty/gay/college/interview-with-a-cocksucker
/nifty/gay/encounters/backroom
/nifty/gay/encounters/thats-what-i-am
/nifty/gay/encounters/cocksucker-heaven