Date: Mon, 31 Dec 2012 07:11:18 -0800 (PST)
From: Anthony Palazzo <apalazzo198@yahoo.com>
Subject: vintage thrills:  33. Threesomes

		       "Might-Have-Been" Threesomes

On a business trip to Puerto Rico I was sitting in a gay bar one late
afternoon.  The bar had pretenses of being "piss elegant," or was at least
trying to get that way.  Business was slow, and I was surprised to see a
good looking young man sit at the bar and begin to strum a guitar and sing.
Management had decided to provide some entertainment for the cocktail hour.
I suspect this guy had shown up and offered to work for a nominal fee or
even for tips.  He was accompanied by a younger cute male friend.
Accompanied in the sense of his being there, not that he provided any
musical help.

So anyway the singer began to introduce himself to those sitting on the
stools nearby, and was shaking hands, asking for song requests, joking
around, etc.  He shook my hand and asked my name, which he promptly forgot,
since he asked it again about twenty minutes later after his set was
finished.  At that point he was sipping a drink and telling me about how he
and his buddy had just arrived in Puerto Rico and were hoping to support
themselves with his musical talent.  He had made the rounds to several
hotels, bars and clubs, but so far had been successful in getting work only
at this small bar.

His friend was a very cute, babyfaced guy of maybe nineteen or twenty with
a heavy southern drawl.  He came from a small town in the rural south and
was aghast at metropolitan San Juan.  He loved it all. Both were very
friendly but I was getting hungry and excused myself and left the bar.

Several hours later I found myself at a casino in a hotel along the Condado
Strip.  Losing money, of course.  Looking up, who do I see but my new
acquaintances, the singer and his friend. They try to bring me luck but to
no avail and we repair to the bar.  They hang out until I offer to pay for
a drink with "my winnings" which they quickly accept. I assumed that these
two guys were a couple.  They had made some gay jokes earlier at the bar.
For example after the singer completed a number his buddy applauded loudly.
The singer said to the crowd, "That's my friend, I like to bring him along
to clap.  Actually I brought him to Puerto Rico because he doesn't have the
clap."  People laughed and everybody assumed that they were at least fuck
buddies if not lovers. But now, later drinking in the casino bar, I wasn't
absolutely certain that they were a couple or even gay since the younger
one kept talking about how he missed his girlfriend.  As he drank more, he
missed her more and more and regretted the argument they had had before he
left town.

"She gimme a nahs blowjob bafoe ah lef. Po gal had no eye-dear tha she
warnt gonna see me agin."

His buddy, the singer, did not like the direction of the conversation at
all.  He had been coming on to me and was touching my arm and thigh from
time to time.

"Hey, hey, hey" the singer said.  "No more of these sad stories.  Let's
have some fun here."  And turning toward me: "What hotel are you staying
at?"

I mentioned one on the Strip.

The singer whistled.  "Hey that one is real expensive. I guess your company
pays for it, huh?  Well, you know Virgil and I here need a place to crash
tonight."

I took another look at the singer.  Prime stuff.  About twenty four or
twenty five years old, thin, wiry build, with a long handsome face,
perennial smile with a prominent jaw and a wispy light brown mustache.  The
younger guy had a round cute face with chubby cheeks, short light brown
hair, slight, compact body. Tempting, very tempting.

I decided not to pick up on the offer for company, (big surprise, right?)
and excused myself shortly afterward.  As I walked back to the hotel, I
fantasized about rolling around my big bed with these two cuties.  A couple
of days later I saw them on the street hanging out near the gay beach.
They were beginning to look tired.  The younger kid's t shirt was dirty and
the older guy had a spaced out look that might have meant drugs or maybe
just that he hadn't slept in a long time.  But although I probably made the
right decision in walking away from those two, I did think about them
several times afterward.  And wondered. What might have been.

Another threesome opportunity that I turned down and don't really regret,
happened in New York.  I was at a small gay bathhouse in lower Manhattan
one afternoon.  It was slow and I began to fool around with a man about my
own age, who also wore a wedding band.  When I left the sauna to cool off,
he followed me outside, and sat next to me on a bench.  He started up with
me again and then suggested that I go home with him to fuck his wife.

"Fuck your wife?  Are you serious?  What would she think of you suggesting
that?"

"Oh, she would love it.  She would really get turned on by you. I know she
would.  We've done this sort of thing before."

"You bring guys home to fuck your wife?  Do you have sex with her?"

"Well, yeah, we have sex.  But it's much more exciting for both of us when
I bring somebody home.  I mean, I screen them very carefully.  I don't
bring home any old scuzzy guy.  You would have a great time.  We live in
Staten Island.  My car is nearby, I'd drive you there and back."

"You know, this sounds exciting.  And I'm really flattered that you want me
in on your scene.  But I'd never do anything like that.  I mean I do fool
around with men, of course.  But I feel that that's really okay, because
I've come to accept the fact that I'm gay or bisexual or whatever.  And I
need male sex, and I'm entitled to express that part of me.  But it feels
like having sex with women would be cheating on my wife."

"Yeah, I understand.  You're not the first guy that has said that kind of
thing to me. That's cool.  I have an understanding with my wife, and we are
in agreement that it spices up our sex life for me to bring home another
man once in a while.  But I completely understand if you're not okay with
that.  If you change your mind, I'll be up in the video room."

And so ended the second Might-Have-Been Threesome.  Years later, I saw an
ad in the personals for a threesome with a woman and a guy, and I thought
back on the sauna offer that I let pass. It was tempting at the time, but
again I think that I did the right thing for me.


The third missed threesome opportunity that I'm remembering today happened
in Washington DC.  An older married guy from Chicago, Roy, tried to set up
a threesome with me and another guy.  What happened is that I had run into
this guy Roy two or three times on earlier business trips.  We were both in
DC for work meetings fairly often, and had met at a hotel bar.  So we knew
each other fairly well.

This evening, as we stood near the bar, nursing a drink and bullshitting,
Roy started to tell me what he would like for me to do for him up in his
room.

"You know what I'd do is to lie you down on the bed with your head hanging
over the side and then I'd stand next to the bed and just slowly, slowly,
feed you my cock.  Gently I would slip it into your mouth and down your
throat.  Fucking your face upside down.  Really turns me on to think of
it."

"Oh, yeah.  Forget it. I don't like the sound of it.  How about me?  How do
I get off?"

"Don't worry.  Don't worry.  I'd treat you right.  I'd make sure you got
your nuts off."

As Roy and I continued to banter in this way, it became apparent that a
third guy was listening to our conversation.

"Sounds hot to me," he interjected at one point.

Roy picked up on his interest immediately and drew him into our
conversation.  He was a younger guy.  Slender, brown hair, pleasant face,
about 35 years old. He was wearing a suit. He seemed to like Roy's
take-charge manner very much.  The two of them began talking among
themselves as I went for a drink refill.  Several minutes later, Roy
approached me and said that he had arranged a threesome with the young guy
in the suit.  I looked over at the third guy.  He was looking over at us
and smiling. Talk about temptation! I hesitantly agreed.  Roy told me his
room number.  He would go up first and then the other guy and I were to go
separately to the elevators and meet up in Roy's room. OK, so what
happened?  Well, you know.  Tony chickened out on the way to the elevator.

The following evening I met Roy in the same bar.

"Hey what happened to you last night?"

"Oh, man, you know me.  I'm always hesitant to take chances with
strangers."

"Too bad, too bad.  That dude was fantastic."  Roy followed with a
salacious account of their encounter.  "He was real disappointed you didn't
show.  He kept saying: 'Where's the other guy?  Is the little guy coming?
I thought you said it would be the three of us.'  You nearly ruined things
for me, man."

And so I again tasted the bitter taste of missed opportunities.  But
planted in the back of my mind was the idea, that somehow, someday I would
take part in a threesome.