Date: Sat, 15 Mar 2008 10:30:22 -0400
From: ronyx <ronyx@woh.rr.com>
Subject: Brittle as a Bird   Chapter 15

The following is a work of fiction. Any similarities to anyone are purely
coincidental. The story is intended for a mature audience. It may contain
profanity and references to gay sex. If this offends you, please leave and
find something more suitable to read. The author maintains all rights to
the story. Do not copy or use without written permission. Write
ronyx@themustardjar.com with your comments. Ronyx is a prolific Nifty
writer.



Brittle as a Bird               Chapter 15



"Get your ass out of bed." Ticker pulled back the covers I had tucked
tightly around my body. My leg got tangled and I fell to the floor. Ticker
stood back and laughed.

"You think that's funny?" I reached out and grabbed his leg, knocking him
to the ground. I wasn't prepared for the consequences. When he hit, the
floor shook and things started falling from his dresser to the floor. A
picture on the wall crashed to the ground.

I stood up and looked down at him. I grabbed my sides and started laughing
uproariously. He looked like a beached whale looking up at me. He extended
his hand and I attempted to pull him up.

"Damn, Ticker," I gasped. "You've got to loose some weight."

He finally stood and bent over, trying to catch his breath. "I'm going to
join a gym and start working out," he gasped. "Star is going to join me."

I began to grin broadly. "You and her are really getting serious aren't
you?"

"I'm joining a gym, aren't I?" I'd known Ticker for years and he'd never
made an attempt at getting in shape. Only one thing could bring about this
change.

"Don't tell me you're in love?" I laughed when his face reddened. "Damn,
Ticker. You are."

A serious look came over him. "Can you believe it, Joey? She likes my fat
ass."

"Has she seen it yet?" I laughed. I walked around and looked down. "It is
kind of, um, large." He put my head around his arm and gave me a noogie.

"Stop that!" I screamed. "I'm going to tell your girlfriend you're a
sadist."

I pulled away, and then reached in and gave him a hug. "I'm really happy
for you. Ticker. You're a good guy. Star's a lucky girl." He squeezed me
tightly, almost smothering me.

He stepped back and looked at me. "How about you and Allen?"

"I don't know," I replied. "We're talking right now."

"I hope it works for you two."

"So do I."

*****************

I skipped lunch to go to the library. Since Allen had brought up the
subject of sex, I wanted to find out all I could about HIV. I wanted to
know if we could have a sexually satisfying relationship. Not that it would
ever happen.

All the articles I googled had the same warning- safe sex. It didn't matter
if the other person was infected or not. It made me stop and think that
when you have sex with a person, you sleep with every one that person has
ever had sex with. I thought of all the countless men I'd sucked in a dark
alley.

Avoid bodily fluids. My heart raced when I read that HIV could be
transmitted orally. I'd always thought that if I didn't let a guy fuck me
I'd be safe. The more I read, the more depressed I became. I'd had sex with
numerous men; most I didn't even know their names. Then there was the orgy
I had engaged in that afternoon I ran from school. I had unprotected sex
the entire time. Again, I assumed since I hadn't let any of them fuck me,
then I was alright. I now knew that wasn't the case.

I wanted to cry when I read that the symptoms of HIV might not appear for
years. I always thought that when you get infected, you'd be sick right
away. It appeared I was wrong again. There were cases where many people had
been infected a decade ago and still never showed any signs of illness.

I was in a panic when I finished reading. I had originally started reading
to protect myself from Allen. Now I was worried I'd have to protect him
from me. One thing was for sure- I had to get tested. I wasn't going to get
any sleep until I did.

"What's wrong with you?" Star had stopped by my locker after school to see
if I wanted a ride home.

"I'm scared," I said. She waited while I got my books from the locker. She
wrapped her arm around mine as we headed to the parking lot.

Before exiting, she stopped. "What's happened?"


"I think I could be infected." Tears started to well up in my eyes.

"Did you and Allen have sex?"

"No," I said. "But what about all the other men I've been with." A worried
look appeared on her face.

"Damn, Joey," she said. "Didn't you use protection?"

"No." I hung my head while tears started to fall. "I didn't even think
about it."

"We've got to get you tested," she insisted. "You have to find out."

"I know," I said sadly. "I'm only seventeen. What if I'm sick?"

She leaned in and hugged me. "We'll worry about that when and if the time
comes. First, we need to find out." I nodded my head into her shoulder.

"There's a free clinic down on Broad Street. I've seen posters on the
bulletin board that says they do free screening. I'll go with you after
school on Monday."

"I'm scared, Star."

She took my hands and squeezed. "I know you are Joey. Let's wait until we
get the results. Maybe you lucked out."

I started laughing nervously. "Me, lucky? You've got to be kidding. We're
talking about Joey Carpenter here. I've never been lucky."

"Well, let's wait before we get too worried," she said. She grabbed my arm
and started leading toward the door. I stopped her.

"One other thing," I said. "Don't say anything to Allen."

"Why?"

"If I am infected, I'd like to tell him myself."

"Of course." She put her arm around my back and wrapped it around me as we
walked out to the parking lot.

*******************

"I still don't know why I have to go?" I was getting dressed to go to Billy
Joe's party. Ticker was excited because Star was going with him. It would
be his first real date with a girl. He was as nervous as a fourteen year
old boy attending his first school dance.

"I need you there, Joey," he pleaded, "Just in case things go wrong."

"I'm not going to be much help," I laughed as I pointed to my
chest. "Remember me, Joey, gay guy. I don't think I'll be able to help
you."

"I still need you there," he insisted. "Moral support."

"That's assuming I have any morals." He reached over and slapped me on my
head.

"How do I look?" He didn't look bad, for Ticker that is. It was one of the
first times I could remember not seeing him in just a tee shirt. He was
wearing a dark blue dress shirt and a pair of gray pants. Star must have
helped him shop for his clothing because there was no way he'd have
selected something like that. But he did, however, look good.

"You clean up nice," I joked.

"I'm really nervous," he confessed. "What if I say something wrong?"

"Then smoke some weed and you'll feel better," I said.

"I don't have any." My mouth fell open. Ticker was going to a party and he
didn't have weed. That was the main reason he was always invited.

Suddenly, his face reddened. "I'm not selling anymore."

"Damn, Dude," I laughed. "You are whipped."

"It's not like that," he insisted. "She didn't say anything about it. I
just don't feel like doing it anymore."


I laughed again. "My Boy," I said as I wrapped my arm around his back. "You
have been bitten by the Love Bug."

"Shut up." He grabbed me and starting giving me a noogie.

"Stop!" I screamed. "Now I have to fix my hair again!"

We picked up Star at her home. I waited patiently in the car while he went
inside. They came out several minutes later holding hands.

"Hey, Handsome," Star said as she got in the car. She laughed when I turned
and looked around the backseat.

How do you describe one of Billy Joe's parties? A mayhem of motley revelers
would come close. He lives about five miles outside of town in a large farm
house. When we pulled up, there were cars parked in every direction in a
field. I could hear music blasting from the backyard.

As soon as we started walking toward the house, several people ran up to
Ticker and whispered in his ear. He'd shake his head and they would walk
away dejectedly. Since he wasn't selling weed, I was sure many people would
be upset with him.

We walked around back and there must have been thirty people milling
about. Most were students from our school, but a few looked like they may
have been a few years older. Everyone seemed to be having a good
time. Several couples were dancing on the patio, and I noticed a crowd
congregated around a large keg of beer.

"Hey!" Billy Joe staggered over with Camille wrapped around him when he saw
us. She immediately reached out and rubbed my chest. I stepped back and
gave her an angry look.

"Loosen up, Cutie." She leaned against Billy Joe for support. It was
obvious they both had been drinking quite a bit before we arrived. "I'm
glad you're here. Now we can get this party hopping." I jumped when she
reached out and grabbed my cock. I pushed her hand away as I took a step
back. Star looked at me and started giggling.

"You bring the stash?" Billy Joe asked Ticker.

"Naw, Man." He said apologetically. "I couldn't score. Thing are pretty dry
right now." I knew he was lying, because in all the years I had known him,
Ticker had never gone a day without weed.

"Fuck," hissed Billy Joe. "Let me see if I can get hold of Reggie. He may
be holding. He pulled out his cell phone and walked away.

"Don't go too far." Camille reached out and grabbed my arm. "We'll get
Billy Joe and go upstairs in a little while." She turned and walked away as
Ticker and Star looked astonished.

"Don't worry," I assured them. "It's not going to happen." They nodded, and
then walked away holding hands. I was left by myself.

I strolled around trying to look like I belonged, but I really wanted to
leave. I could tell by the way people looked at me, they were wondering why
I had been invited. It was the first time they had ever seen me outside of
school. To say I was uncomfortable would be an understatement.

It got worse when I walked over to the keg and poured myself a beer. "Fag,"
I heard someone mutter. I walked away and sat down in a lawn chair, away
from everyone else. I'd been there about five minutes when I noticed Barry
and Gene pull up and get out of Gene's red Corvette.

Barry strutted into the backyard with Gene trailing behind him. Several
girls screamed and ran up to them, rubbing their bodies against them. Barry
seemed to enjoy the attention, but Gene would take a step back when a girl
tried to wrap her arms around him.

Suddenly, Barry looked up and noticed me sitting by myself. His eyes
narrowed in anger. I looked around to see if I spotted Ticker. I was going
to ask him to take me home. The last thing I wanted was a confrontation
with Barry away from school where no one would be able to stop him if he
decided to fight me.

I got up and went inside the house where I found a group of guys watching a
college football game on a big screen television. I took a seat in the
corner and sat down. I figured if I made myself scarce, then perhaps I
could avoid running into Gene and Barry.

I sat quietly for an hour as the guys shouted and screamed at their
team. It always amazes me how people can become so emotionally involved by
watching a guy run down the field with a small ball tucked under his
arm. However, at one point even I got into the game when the team they were
rooting for made a touchdown.

After the game ended, the room quickly emptied as everyone headed to the
backyard for more beer. When I stepped outside, it was quite evident that
most people were in the final stages of inebriation. It appeared that many
couldn't walk a straight line across the backyard without stumbling and
falling.

I was glad that I had never attended parties in the past if this is what
happened at them. Several of the girls were topless and guys were running
around trying to feel their tits. A guy was standing by a tree with his
pants pulled down taking a piss while everyone laughed and encouraged
him. By the barn, a girl was on her knees as a guy rammed his cock into her
mouth.

I was disgusted by what I saw. They were nothing but a bunch of
hypocrites. For years they had verbally assaulted me for my actions, but
their behavior was even more abhorrent. They were unashamedly getting drunk
and engaging in lewd sexual behavior. At least mine was done in private
without an audience.

"Having fun?" Camille staggered up to me with a beer in her hand. She was
topless. She grabbed a tit and asked, "Want some of this?" I gave her a
disgusted look and walked away. I started looking for Ticker and Star.

I was angry at Ticker for bringing me. He could have warned me what went on
at these parties. I was far from innocent, but I wasn't prepared for the
behavior I was witnessing.

I strolled around searching for them, and I finally walked into the
kitchen. Ticker and Star were sitting at the table playing a game of
Monopoly! They looked up and smiled when they saw me enter.

"Having fun?" Ticker asked. Both of them had a Coke in front of them, and
it seemed they were enjoying themselves with the other couple at the table.

"Yeah," I said. I gave them a slight smile and walked from the kitchen. I
didn't want to spoil the good time they were having. I wasn't even sure
they were aware of what other activities were going on outside.

I pulled my coat tight around me and decided to walk around the farm. There
was almost a full moon out, so I could see where I was going. I found a
narrow lane leading from the house and decided to follow it. As I walked
away from the house, the noise began to subside as I entered into a small
forest.

I heard some moaning, and I peered through the darkness and saw a couple
engaged in sex. They had their pants pulled down and she was lying over a
large rock while he thrust himself into her. I turned and walked quickly
away, deeper into the forest.

I began to think of Sullivan's Lake. I wanted to be there. I had always
enjoyed the silence I found by the lakeside. Experiencing the rowdy crowd
tonight made me appreciate it even more. I found out one thing about
myself. I enjoyed the solitude I found by being alone. For so many years I
had wondered what it would be like to be popular and attend parties and
other social events. Tonight I realized that I had missed nothing.

I walked further into the forest, following the narrow path. I must have
walked for about fifteen minutes before I came to the end. I was surprised
when I saw that it had circled around and I was now standing in front of
the farm house.

I could hear the loud music and rowdy laughter thundering from the back. I
figured I'd probably been at the farm for about three hours, so it must
have been well past midnight. I walked around and looked through the
kitchen window. Ticker and Star were still playing Monopoly. They were
laughing and appeared to be having a good time. I didn't want to ruin it by
asking them to take me home, so I pulled my coat tight around me and walked
back to the front porch and sat on the steps.

I had closed my eyes and had almost drifted off to sleep when I heard
someone approaching from the side of the house. I opened my eyes to see
Gene staggering my way. It was obvious he had been drinking very heavily.

I stood up to walk away, but he staggered over and fell against me. I
pushed him back, but he grabbed me by my waist and pulled me into him.

"There you are, Joey." His words were slurred and he reeked of alcohol.

"Leave me alone, Gene." I pushed him off me. He stumbled backwards but did
not fall.

Again, he approached me and grabbed me around the waist, pulling me closer
to him.

"Don't you like me?" His eyes were half shut as he looked at me.

"Get off me, Gene." I pushed him back again. He teetered but stepped back
up to me.

"Oh," he said angrily. "You can fuck my brother, but I'm not good enough
for you." I tried to push him away, but he held on to my waist.

"I'm as good as he is," he said. "I've wanted you for a long time. Let me
show you." He grabbed the back of my head and pulled it to him. I pursed my
lips tightly as he pressed his to mine. I struggled to get away, but he was
leaning against me, refusing to let me go.

"What the fuck is going on!" Gene staggered back and pulled away as Barry
and a couple of other people approached.

Barry grabbed me and pushed me against the side of my house. I was too
surprised to see his fist hit me on the left side of my face. I reeled back
and fell against the wall.

"What were you doing with Gene?" He screamed.

"I wasn't doing anything!" I shouted back. I balled my fist and threw a
punch, missing him completely. People were running towards us. I guess
someone had spread the word that there was a fight.

"You fucking liar." He swung again, hitting me in my stomach. I leaned over
in pain. I felt another blow to the left side of my face.

"Leave him alone!" Gene grabbed Barry around the waist and pulled him away
from me.

"Are you protecting this fag?" He turned to Gene and shouted. He stared
into Gene's face. "You fucker." He threw a violent punch into Gene's
temple. "Were you letting that faggot kiss you?" Gene fell to the ground,
but got up and charged Barry, causing them to crash to the ground. Barry
rolled Gene on his back and began to pummel him with his fist. I ran over
and tried to pull him off, but Ticker ran up and grabbed me by my arm.

"Come on, Joey." He shouted. "Let's get out of here." He grabbed Star by
the arm and we ran to his car. He started the engine and we tore off down
the country lane. I looked back and there was still a large crowd gathered
around the front of the house.

"What it the hell did you do?" Star was turned around and looking angrily
at me.

"Why do people always assume I did something?" I shouted back angrily. "I
was sitting on the porch waiting for you guys to finish your game and Gene
came up and tried to kiss me."

"What!" Ticker and Star shouted in unison.

"He was drunk, and I tried to push him off," I explained. "But Barry came
around the side of the house and saw us. He thought I had done something to
Gene."

"Then why was he fighting Gene?"

"I think he realized his best friend is gay."

"Sweet Jesus." Star turned around and plopped into her seat. It was several
minutes before she spoke.

"Are you alright?" She turned leaned over the seat, inspecting my
face. "You're going to have a nice black eye." I winced when she pressed
her hand to my left eye.

"Did you know Gene was gay?" She looked at me questioningly.

"He can't be gay," she insisted. "His father would kill him."

"Then why did he try to kiss me if he's not gay? He also told me he's
wanted me for a long time."

"Damn." It was the first time Ticker had said anything. "You really know
how to get yourself into a mess, don't you?"

"I didn't do anything," I shouted.

"I didn't say you did," he replied. "I'm really sorry, Joey. I should have
listened when you said you didn't want to go tonight."

"It's not your fault, Ticker," I insisted. "Trouble just always seems to
follow me. That's the story of my life."

"Don't do this, Joey." Star grabbed my hand and held it. "None of this was
your fault." She looked over at Ticker, "Or yours."

"What's going to happen now?" I asked worriedly. "Half the school knows
about it by now."

"I don't know." She squeezed my hand tightly. I started to laugh.

"At least they won't call me anything they haven't already for the past few
years."

"But what about Gene?" Star asked.

"What about the Mother Fucker?" This time it was Ticker. "The son of a
bitch has been on Joey's case for years. It's about time he got some back."

"I still don't want to see him hurt." It wasn't because I felt anything for
him. He was Allen's brother and for that reason I didn't want any harm come
to him.

"Me either," replied Star. Our eyes met and I knew she was thinking the
same thing.

When we took Star home, I looked over at Gene's house. Several lights were
on, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. The first thing I looked for
was clothes lying out on the front lawn. Once his father found out he was
gay, he'd probably throw him out of the house like he did Allen.

Ticker and Star disappeared around the back of the house. I thought it
strange they didn't enter the front, until I realized that Ticker probably
wanted a chance to be alone to say goodnight.

I was resting my head against the window with my eyes shut. My head was
throbbing from the punch Barry landed to my head. Suddenly, I heard the
roar of an automobile engine. I looked over and saw Gene's red convertible
pull into the lane next door. The brake lights came on, and the car was
thrown into reverse. His tires squealed as he backed up and then drove over
to Star's driveway and pulled in back of Ticker's car.

I turned and watched as he fell out of the car. When he stood, his face was
swollen and his clothes were splattered with blood. I quickly locked the
door as he walked up and tried to open it.

"This is all your fucking fault." He started pounding on the door with his
fists. I looked into his face and his eyes were almost swollen shut. I
don't know how he managed to drive home.

"Get out of the car, you fucker!" He continued to pull the door open. "I'm
going to kill you. You've ruined my life."

Ticker and Star came running around from the back. The porch lights came
on, and security lights lit up the front yard. A man I assumed was Star's
father, stepped out to see what was happening.

"Get out!" Gene screamed. He hit the window several more times. Star ran up
and pulled him away. He fell to the ground sobbing uncontrollably.

"Why?" He screamed. He was clutching her tightly. "Why?"

An immense feeling of sorrow swept over me. I had suffered for years going
through what he was now feeling. Even though I should have hated him, I
didn't. His crumbled body desperately holding Star was a pitiful sight. I
reached up and wiped away a tear that was falling down my cheek.

******************

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