Date: Fri, 5 Jul 2002 06:01:35 EDT
From: sirchadwick@Hotmail.com
Subject: Chasing Brandon Chapter 3 (Chad)

This story is completely fictional.  Any resemblance to real people or
events is completely coincidental.  This story involves sex between
consenting teenagers.  If you are not legally allowed to read this then
please don't.

I really appreciate the time a few of you took to send me a positive
e-mail.  I am always open to criticism and ideas to spice up my writing.
Feel free to e-mail me at Sirchadwick@Hotmail.com


Chasing Brandon
Chapter 3


Cameron

	After Bryce got out of the car I felt so bad.  I knew that when he
kissed me he was really into me, but I think his feelings went a lot
deeper.  Brandon has always had a hold on my heart, and as much as I like
Bryce, I'm not ready to move on.  I doubt that me and Brandon will ever be
together again, but I can't help but to hope.  I sat there and watched
Bryce walk away.  What if I was missing out on a really great person
because I can't get over my 'first love'?  I realized I was still parked in
front of Bryce's house.  I snapped myself out of deep thought.  I started
the car and drove away.  I took one last look at the house.  Bryce was
looking out his bedroom window at me and his face was weighed down with
sadness.

*****

I held the phone waiting for somebody to pick it up.  Finally I got an
answer.

"Hello." It was him I could tell his sexy voice anywhere.  He sounded sad
though.

"Bryce can we talk?"  I really wanted to talk to him.  Even if we didn't
date I wanted him as my friend.

"Cameron, I don't want to talk right now.  I will come around and then we
can talk.  Just leave me alone until then, OK?"  He didn't even wait for me
to answer.  I heard the phone click.  Still holding the receiver in my hand
I felt the worst I did in a long time.  I don't even think I had a reason
to feel so bad.  Its not like he was my boyfriend.  Maybe I led him on.
Maybe he will never be a boyfriend, thanks to me.  I put the phone back and
sat down on the couch.

"What's up Cam?  You look like something is bothering you."  Mike's face
was full of concern.  I didn't even notice that he came in.  Mike and I
were really close.

"It's Bryce.  I think I really messed things up between us."  He was
watching me as I spoke.  All I could do was lower my head so he didn't see
my eyes fill up with tears.  Why did I feel so bad?  Was it because I lost
him in a romantic way? Was it because I was scared I might loose my best
friend?  When Bryce and I first kissed last weekend I felt something for
him, but I quickly replaced it with thoughts of Brandon.  I'm scared that
if I take a risk on a new relationship I will miss out on ever getting
Brandon again.  If I wait for Brandon I will miss out on possible
relationships.

"Umm Cameron."  I heard him call me but it didn't pull me out of my
thoughts. "Cameron!" I came to a conclusion.  If I wanted Brandon this bad
I should just suck it up and go after what I want.  "CAMERON!"  I jumped.
Mike finally ripped threw my thoughts and scared the shit out of me.

"WHAT?" It came out ruder then I wanted.  Mike was shocked and hurt that I
had snapped at him I could see it plain and clear on his face but it was
soon clouded over with concern once more.

"Cam, what happened?"  Mike is the only person in my family that knew I was
gay.  If my parents were to find out about my sexuality they would put me
out on my ass.  I told Mike everything that happened.  From when I caught
them in the living room up until the phone call.  I think he wore the look
of embarrassment for while as I spoke.  He paid attention to everything and
didn't say a word.

"Bryce is hurt, I don't want to hurt him" I was getting teary eyed.

"Cameron, I like Bryce.  I know you still love Brandon but its time to move
on bro."  With that he stood up and walked away.  I was so tired of waiting
around for my love to come to me and today I think it finally pushed me to
get what I truly wanted in my heart.  Brandon Tate.

*****

The morning announcements came on.  Since last night I haven't been able to
keep my mind from zoning out.  Mom had to literally shake me to get my
attention during breakfast.  I didn't really pay attention to what was
being said on the overhead intercom, but I did catch that track signups
would be done today after school.  I haven't joined any sports since I was
last in football, but I had my mind set on a goal.  Brandon joins track
every year.  The only difficult thing about this is that Bryce will be
joining too.

School was not the same as usual.  It was already after lunch and I haven't
seen Bryce once besides in class.  Which means he was avoiding me.  I
couldn't hide the disappointment on my face when Rick and Matt met me for
lunch and Bryce was no where to be found.  Matt asked me what was wrong but
I shrugged him off.  He didn't push it but let me know he was there to talk
to if I needed him.  Rick was oblivious to what was going on.  He has a new
girlfriend and she had him preoccupied.  The rest of my day dragged on as I
moped around.

*****

When I entered the gym there were a lot more guy's in there then I had
expected.  I looked for people that I knew.  I saw Brandon standing around
with some of his friends.  He was looking at me as I walked further into
the gym.  When I caught his eyes with mine he looked down and then
continued to chat with his friends.  This is going to be tougher then I
anticipated.  I found myself looking for Bryce.  He was sitting on the
floor with his back against the wall to my left.  He didn't see me because
he was reading a book.  I made my way to him in hopes we could talk.

"Umm... Hi Bryce." I said.  He looked up and his beautiful eyes were
staring back at me.  Usually with more feeling then they had at that
moment.  His gaze went from me to something behind me.  I turned around to
see what he was looking at.  He was watching Brandon. I felt so bad.  I
turned back around to Bryce who had gone back to reading his book.  I
didn't see us talking anytime soon but decided to ask anyway.  "Can we
talk?"

He didn't even look at me this time.  "I'm busy reading this for English."

"Whatever!" I said. Then I turned around and walked away.  I noticed
Brandon watching as I stormed to the bleachers across from where he was
standing.  I sat down and waited until they passed out the appropriate
papers and gave a little incite about what it would take to be on the track
team.  Tryouts wouldn't be for another week so I had a little bit of time
to get in gear.  I signed my name to the tryouts set up for next Wednesday
and left.

On my way to my car I heard someone call me.  I spun round surprised to see
Ashley Tate approaching me.  We have not talked since the end of last year,
since Brandon.

"Are you okay?"  She asked me.

"I'm fine.  Just frustrated" I turned back around to look for my car.  She
started walking with me. I wanted her to go away, she obviously didn't get
the point.  "Cam, you don't seem fine."  I was getting very annoyed.

"I'm Fine!" I said sternly hoping she would leave me alone.  She finally
got the hint.

"I'm sorry Cameron, I didn't mean to bother you.  If you need to talk I'm
here."

"Sure you are."  I mumbled under my breath.  If she heard, she showed no
sign.

"I was looking for Bryce.  He was supposed to meet me after school so I can
tutor him." She said.  She was practically running to keep up with my pace.

"He was in the gym signing up for track.  If he isn't there then I don't
know where to find him."  I walked faster.  Damn my car seemed so much
further then it was.  It was like I couldn't get there quick enough.  She
grabbed my arm and stopped me.  I just stood there, I didn't even turn to
look at her.

"Brandon misses you." She said barely above a whisper.  She let go of my
arm and walked away.

I reached my car.  My mind was racing.  How did she know he missed me?  Did
he tell her?  Did she over hear him say it?  Was she just trying to make me
feel better?  I made it home but I don't even remember driving.

*****

I woke up an hour before my alarm was set to go off.  This was a little
unusual for me but something about my dream gave me a chill and had me
wide-awake.  I took advantage of the extra hour and decided that I would go
for a run.

The morning air was chilled and smelled of rain.  The sky was dark filled
with gray clouds.  Something about the smell of rain always makes me feel
sad.  My run lasted about an hour.  I was able to clear my mind and focus
on my stride and my heartbeat.  I haven't gone running in a while so I felt
a little bit winded when I was done.  When I reached my house again I sat
on the porch waiting for my pulse to slow and catch my breath.  Thoughts of
Brandon and Bryce came flooding back to me.  I don't know what I'm going to
do.

Brandon has not spoken to me since last year.  We ended on bad terms.
After I found out what he did and what he tried to prove, I was crushed.  I
didn't speak to him for 3 weeks.  When we finally did speak we were in
front of all his buddies.  I remember looking at him and seeing fear and
pain in his eye but it didn't stop him from doing what he did.  He told me
to stay away from him.  He said that I was just a stupid faggot he got to
suck his dick.  His friends threw me a couple insults too.  I didn't cry I
just walked away.  He disappeared after that.  I had so much love for him
that I was never able to hate him for what he did.  I forgave him before he
even hurt me.  As stupid as it may sound, I know he cared about me and I
also know he was putting up a front for his friends.  He stopped hanging
out with that crowd this year.  He still played football but he didn't fall
into the clique he was in last year.

I quickly took a shower, got dressed, and I was on my way to school.  I
hoped it would be better then yesterday.  After I parked my car and walked
on campus I saw Matt sitting near the coke machines.  I went to him and sat
down on the bench.

"Hey Cam."

"Hey.  What's up?"  I asked.

"Nothing, What's up with Bryce?"  I gave him a puzzled look.  "He was here
a minute ago when he saw you pull in the parking lot he said he had to go."
He explained.  I didn't say anything I just sat there and looked down.

"Okay fine, don't tell me what's going on."  I could tell he was
frustrated.  He didn't say anything else.  He got up and left.  I felt bad
but I didn't know how to explain my situation.  Matt hates Brandon with a
passion.  After what happened last year Matt was my rock.  We became close
nothing more then good friends.  When Bryce and I became good friends Matt
started to distance him self from me.  He never spoke to me about how he
felt.  He was always emotionally stronger then I was so when we were close
we were always working on my problems.  Who was his rock?  Sadness once
again swept over me.  I heard the warning bell to start class and I was
off.  I am going to talk to Matt later today.

On my way to class I saw Bryce from across the quad he was talking to Mike.
Something Mike said made Bryce laugh.  I wonder what they were talking
about.  Until the night Bryce stayed at my house they never really spoke.
I'll have to ask Mike about that later.  As I pulled myself out of thought,
I made eye contact with Bryce.  I must have looked like an idiot standing
there staring.  He put his hand on Mike's shoulder gave him a squeeze and
left.

The day pretty much blew.  The teachers seemed to be piling on the work.  I
have two essays, a project for chemistry, and 3 chapters to read in US
History.  I went to the cafeteria at lunch but the guys didn't show.  Rick
was with his girlfriend, Matt upset, and Bryce was ignoring me.  I did some
homework instead.

I decided to take a break and move outside.  I sat next to the coke
machines under one of trees facing D building. No one was around when I sat
there so I got myself comfortable and began to do more homework.  I heard a
familiar voice come from across the walkway.  I glanced up and saw Brandon
talking to a teacher.  He looked like he was in a rush.  By the looks of it
she was coming out of the building as he was going in and she stopped him.
I finally heard him say "Thanks Mrs. G" and run off into building.  He
didn't see me.  Not long after Brandon disappeared A skinny lanky guy
walked up to the doors of the building, but before he could make it in
someone called his name.

"Leo!" He spun around, also looking very suspicious, I think he was in a
rush too and this person was holding him up.

He put on a fake smile as the guy approached him.  The boy handed him a
science book.

"Thanks man I would have got a 0 for no book today." I heard the other guy
say.  Leo took the book and waved bye as the other guy kept walking.  As he
turned around to head back into D building he looked me dead square in the
eyes.  Panic ran across his face and he ran into the building.  I tried to
go back to doing my homework when I remembered what Bryce told me about
Brandon, he said he caught him in the restroom on Monday during lunch.  Oh
man.  I gathered my books and jumped up to my feet and entered the
building.  Nobody is really allowed in the buildings during lunch, So the
halls were empty, the bathrooms are at the end of the hall.  I walked slow
scared of what I might hear if I got closer. I saw the Bathroom door fly
open and Leo came walking out yelling into the Bathroom.

"Whatever!"  He screamed as I ducked into a classroom.  I heard him walk by
and exit. I waited a sec in case I heard a second pair of footsteps.
Hearing nothing I entered the hall and continued my walk to the bathroom.
I heard the door swing open again, which startled me.  I had jumped back
about a foot to avoid getting hit by the door.  When I looked up, I was
face to face with boy I loved.  He was taller then me and bigger.  His eyes
were emerald green but full of anger.  I have to say when the look of shock
cleared his face his eyes softened. He didn't move he just stood there.
After the shock of seeing him left I mumbled out a hello and lowered my
gaze.  Because of our last encounter I half expected him to yell at me.
When he remained still and quiet I raised my head to face him.  I fought
hard to hold my tears, wanting so bad to hold him.

He finally said "Hi."  We both seemed to be at a loss for words.

I gathered my nerves and asked "why was that guy so mad?" He never took his
eyes off mine.

"That's none of your business." My question seemed to bring back his anger.
The warning bell for class rang.  Relieved, I turned around and started to
walk away.

"What were you doing in here?"  I stopped dead in my tracks.  Fuck, How was
I going answer that without making it seem like I was spying?  I turned
around to face him once again.

"I needed to use the restroom, I wasn't expecting to see you.  I'll use
another one."  I waited to see if he would make another comment.  He
dropped his eyes and I turned around and left.  All the pain Brandon caused
me came rushing back.

I walked out of the building unable to hold back tears.  My vision was
blurred and all I wanted to do was find the closest bathroom.  Desperately
trying to hide my face from people walking by I ran into the science
building and then into someone.  I hit my head on the floor when the impact
caused me to fall down.  The intense pain that flooded my head made it hard
for me to open my eyes.  I heard someone apologize and then grab my hand to
help me up.  I finally opened my eyes and looked to see who it was.  That's
when I met Leo for the first time.  I took his hand and got up.

"No, I'm sorry."  I said.  He smiled at me.  He was a cute Kid kind of
skinny but very nice smile.

"Are you okay?"  He must have noticed my pain as a pounding headache took
over my head.

"I'm fine, thanks.  I am going to be late."  He picked up my backpack and
handed it to me.  "Thanks again."  With that I turned to go to my next
class.

"I'm Leo." I heard him shout behind me I turned around and said "nice to
meet you Leo I'm Cameron."  He smiled again and walked away.

I made it my next class late of course.  The teacher droned on about how
being prompt is important to being successful.  He finally said I could sit
down.  Before I could make it to my desk I started to feel dizzy.  I
grabbed the closest stable object and clung to it.  I heard someone say
"he's bleeding, Mr. Davis," and it went black.

I woke up and realized I was in an unfamiliar place, scared I sat up and
attempted to get off the bed.  I was quickly fought back to lying down when
my pounding headache returned.  After the pain subsided I opened my eyes
and was startled by Mrs. Bellows standing over me.

"I'm sorry Cameron.  I didn't mean to scare you."  She smiled a very
pleasant smile and walked away.  She returned about a minute later with a
glass of water.  I sat up in the bed and took the cup.

"You passed out in class.  You were bleeding on the back of your head.  How
did that happen?" I told her about the incident with Leo, sparing the
details. She explained the hit made me dizzy which made me pass out.

"I called your Mom and she is on her way to pick you up.  One of your
classmates will bring over your homework around 5:30."  She handed me a
written pass to present to my teachers tomorrow.  My Mom came into the
office signed me out and we left.

"What happened?"  She asked as we reached the car.

"I ran into somebody, fell, hit my head, got dizzy, and passed out.  No big
thing, I'm fine."  She smiled and drove us home.

*****

I took a nap when I got home.  I woke up to the smell of dinner being
prepared, and went down stairs.  I still had the bandage around my head and
I was dizzy but I made it to the kitchen.  As I was sitting down someone
rang the doorbell.  I made my way to the door. Slowly but surely.  My
headache seemed to get worse with every move I made.  I answered the door
and was shocked to see who was standing there.

"Bryce, what are you doing here?"  I asked confused.

"I told Mrs. Bellows I would bring over your homework when we took you to
the nurses' office."  He forced out a half smile and handed me a book with
a worksheet in it.  I was happy it was him who brought my work.

"Would you like to come in, we are having dinner soon?"  He hesitated and
made sure not to make any type of eye contact but he eventually said yes
and stepped into my house.

I led him to the kitchen where he said hello to my Mom and Mike, who was
now helping cut up vegetables.  Bryce gave Mike a knowing smile that I
don't think was intended for me to see.  A hint of jealousy came to me but
was quickly pushed away and I made my way to my room.  Bryce followed me
but didn't say a word.  When we reached the top of the stairs I again had
to stop moving and wait for the pounding to abate.  Bryce noticed my pain
and slowly directed me to my room.  He sat me down on my bed and left.  He
returned about 3 minutes later with a cup of water and aspirin.  Thankful,
I took the medicine and rested my head against the wall.  He sat on the
edge of my bed not saying a word.  All I could do was stare at the profile
of his beautiful face.  If I knew deep in my heart that Brandon would never
be with me again I would pour out love for this boy, but my hope was to
strong to just let go and move on.  He must have felt my stares because he
turned to face me.  His eyes defied his attempts to show no emotion.  As I
held his eyes with mine I could see tears building and reflecting off the
light from the window.  He noticed my face had turned to concern and he
quickly blinked his tears away and stood up.

"Bryce, I'm so sorry if I hurt you.  It was never my intention."

"I know I'm sorry for being a jerk.  I just needed to get over the
self-pity shit and realize that you are my best friend and I need your
friendship."  I managed to stand up next to him and hug him.

"Friends?"  I asked.  He forced another smile once again unable to hide his
pain and said "of course."  We both separated from our hug when we heard a
knock at the door.  Mike was standing there.  I wonder how much he
overheard before he interrupted.

"What's up Mike?"  I asked.  He smiled.

"I was hoping I could talk to Bryce."  He seemed a little embarrassed as
Bryce made his way out the door.  Bryce showed me his index finger letting
me know he will take only a minute then he would come back.  I nodded.

I went to close the door behind them when curiosity got the best of me and
I went to Mike's door to see if I could over hear their conversation.
Their voices were low but audible.

"Yeah I can help you out.  We can go running in the morning and work out
after school, if you want."

"Thanks Bryce, I figured I'd ask you since you will be joining track and
working out anyway."  Mike said.

"Okay but why did you need to ask me this in private?  Cameron wouldn't
have cared" There was a long silence then Mike spoke again.

"I need to tell you something very personal." Mike said. "But I don't want
you to hate me."  My little bro.'s voice was saddened and barley
perceptible.  He began to speak again but I heard my Mom coming up the
stairs.  To avoid getting caught eavesdropping I ducked into the restroom.
I felt bad about listening in on their conversation but I also felt a pang
of jealousy overcome me, which was followed by anger.  I wanted to know
what Mike told Bryce.  No scratch that, I HAD to know.  I left the restroom
and saw that Mike and Bryce were not in his room anymore.

Bryce was sitting on my bed with a puzzled but flushed look on his
face. "Are you okay?"  I asked.

"I'm fine."

"Well, what did he want?"  He looked at me as if he was questioning if he
should spill the beans or not. He chose not.

"He is going to be trying out for baseball and asked if he could workout
with me since ill be in track.  I told him sure."  He smiled his gorgeous
smile and he was done.  Disappointed I sat down next to him.

"What?" He asked.  "You want to run with me too!" I don't think it was an
actual invite to their morning routine but I forced a smile and we headed
downstairs.  Dinner was placed on the table and the four of us ate with
little conversation.  Bryce didn't eat much but I'm sure it was because he
had to go home and eat with his own family.  When we were done we played
some video games until Bryce announced he had to head home.  My headache
had died down by this time so I decided I would walk him some of the
way. He didn't live very far from me.  I asked him if he still wanted to
stay the night this weekend and he accepted.  He turned to face me walking
backwards about halfway to his house.  His eyes sparkled when he smiled.
He stopped gave me a hug and continued the rest of the way by him self.

*****

When I walked back into my house thoughts of Matt rushed my head.  Thinking
of how he must feel with all his friends keeping to themselves I decided I
would call him and have a talk.  His little sister Kayla answered the
phone.  She was about 7 years old and adorable.

"Hi Kay, Its Cameron, can I speak with Matt please?"

"Cameron! Guess what Margie did in school today?"  I smiled.  Getting Matt
on the phone was always a difficult task with Kay.

"Let me guess she peed in her pants?"  I guessed jokingly.  Kayla started
laughing.

"No silly, she... " Matt picked up the phone "hello."  I could hear Kayla
screaming in the back round that she wanted to talk to me.  Matt told her
to go tell Mom, and she left.

Laughing I said "hello."

"Are you feeling better?"  He asked.

"Yea, how did you know what happened?"

"Bryce."  He said

"Oh okay.  Matt I wanted to apologize to you about this morning.  I should
have let you know what was going on, you are my friend."

"Don't worry about it.  I knew you would come around.  So what has been
bothering you and Bryce?"  I went ahead and explained to him everything
that happened so far that week.  Being a trustworthy friend I had no
problem discussing my being gay with Matt.  He knew back when I was with
Brandon.  He was kind of shocked to learn that Bryce was also gay, and I
felt bad for letting that piece of information slip, but he got over it
quick.  He also got a little angry when he found out that I would try to
get Brandon back but said he was there for support and would be there for
me always.  Happy and satisfied that I finally talked to Matt and Bryce, I
was able to get a goodnights rest.

*****

School was same as normal.  We all ate lunch together except Rick, where he
disappeared to none of us knew.  We three were laughing and joking around,
being guys, when I was interrupted mid-sentence.  I turned around to see
who had tapped on my shoulder and found Brandon standing there.  I looked
at Bryce and Matt.  Matt sat there with an angry look on his face but he
said nothing he just watched everything Brandon did or said, Bryce on the
other hand didn't even look up from the table he ate his lunch and didn't
say a word.  I turned back to Brandon who was now looking a little
paranoid.  He glanced around the cafeteria to see if anyone was watching or
listening.

"Cameron, Can we talk real fast?"  I stood up and followed him out of the
lunchroom and into the quad.  We sat down on one of the benches.  He didn't
say anything at first he just stared at the ground.  Feeling a little
uncomfortable and scared I was also feeling pain and hurt for the way he
had treated me before and then as if my heart would not allow those
feelings I was over taken with love and appreciation for Brandon Tate.

"I'm sorry."  He said.  I almost didn't hear it.  He spoke so low and a
group of girls walked by giggling at the very moment he spoke.  I was
looking at his face so I was able to make out what he said.  I didn't know
what to say.  Should I let him know I forgave him long ago?  Should I tell
him how I feel?

"Brandon, you have hurt me in ways I can't even explain, but I forgive
you."  I said.  He looked at me confused.

"Why?" He asked.  "I don't deserve it."

"I just do, okay?"  He smiled.

"Thanks Cam."  With that he stood up.  "I have to go."  He turned around
and walked away.  There is no doubt in my mind he was going to meet Leo.
Maybe Brandon and Leo were together.  Maybe they loved each other.  Tears
started to cloud up my eyes but before they could drop I blinked them away
and returned to the lunch table.  Bryce didn't even seem to notice that I
had left or returned, and Mat was still fuming on seeing Brandon again.

"I hate him Cameron!" Matt spit out.  I gave a half smile.

"He said he was sorry."  I looked at Bryce who had now come back from
whatever thoughts he was having.  He looked at me with sadness but forced
yet another smile.  I knew he was determined to be my support even if it
meant bottling up his feelings.  I was worried, that cant be healthy.

"He doesn't deserve your forgiveness Cam." Matt was getting angrier.

"Matt I make that decision not you."  He nodded his head and regained
control of his temper.

The rest of my day flew by.  I was happy and yet sad.  My emotions seemed
to take over my body these last few days.  If I wasn't extremely happy I
was, on the verge of tears, or upset and frustrated.  For some reason, and
had it been anybody else I wouldn't have felt this way, I felt guilty for
wanting Brandon.  Bryce was always on my mind and I was walking on glass
around him.  I finally told myself I would talk to him tonight when he
stayed over.

*****

Like last time Bryce, Mike and I played video games until about 1 a.m. Mike
said he was going to bed.  Bryce said he was sleepy too and so we all went
upstairs.  I wanted some 'alone' time with Bryce but because of Mike we
couldn't and I feared it might be too late to talk now.

Mike mumbled something that sounded like goodnight and went into his room.
Bryce went to the bathroom and I went into my room.  I didn't know if Bryce
wanted to crash on the floor or in my bed.  When he came back form the
restroom I asked him he said he would feel better if he slept on the couch.
I couldn't hide my disappointment.  Besides wanting to talk to Bryce I
liked him a lot.  I wanted to feel him sleeping next to me.  He must have
noticed my disappointment.

"Is that okay?"  He asked.  Feeling a little embarrassed, I avoided his
gaze.

"Yeah if that is what you want sure.  I can take you down some blankets."
I put on a fake smile just like he always does and walked to the linen
closet in the hallway.  I grabbed a big blanket and a pillow and walked
downstairs as he followed behind me.  When we got downstairs I put
everything down.  We sat down on opposite ends of the couch and I decided
to say something to break the ice.

"If you want, I can call Mike.  You guys can relive last weekend."  I said
with a big grin on my face.  He laughed.  He knew I was teasing and quickly
pounced on me.  I had just enough time to grab the pillow and smack him in
the head, which only caused him to laugh harder.  Knowing that he would
come back at me with full force, I got up.  He, of course, got up to chase
me.  I ran behind the couch and he stayed in front, if I moved left he
would move left, if I moved right he would do the same, determined to catch
me.  Finally I broke down laughing and let my guard down.  He came behind
the couch with a mischievous grin on his face.  Before I knew it he flipped
me over the couch and I landed on my back.  I grabbed him before he could
get away and pulled him on top of me while I was still on the couch.  We
were both in hysterics.... And then his eyes met mine.  My heart started
racing and felt drawn into him.  He was so sexy and I wanted him more then
I thought I ever would.  I wondered what it would be like to kiss him again
then I started to get hard thinking about him.  I think he felt my manhood
growing against his, which caused him to snap out of the pull that had us
so close to kissing.  Seconds later he was running upstairs and I was lying
there shocked and disappointed.  I made things worse, I thought.  He says
lets be friends and I go and get all physical with him.  I wanted to get to
my bedroom before he left the bathroom and on my way I heard his sobs from
the hallway.  Feeling guilty and sad I crawled into bed and cried myself to
sleep.

*****

I must have only fell asleep for an hour or two I woke up and it was 3 a.m.
I heard the TV downstairs and wondered who was up.  I crawled out of bed
only wearing boxers and socks.  I made my way down the stairs as quietly as
I could.  I stayed out of view from anyone who might be sitting at the TV,
just in case last weeks incident repeats itself.  I didn't see anyone
sitting on the couch.  I assumed that Bryce fell asleep with the TV on, So
I went to turn the TV off.  As I walked past the couch to the television I
saw that the couch was empty.  Where is Bryce?  Confused I went to Matt's
room to see if he knew where Bryce was.  I knocked on the door but I got no
answer, so I went ahead and just walked in.  I have never felt as much pain
in my heart as I did at that moment.  Bryce was sleeping with Mike.  They
were both asleep and Bryce's head was lying on Mike's chest.  Neither of
them had clothes on from what I could tell.  They were covered from the
waist down by blankets.  I became angry and realized I was hurt.  I was
jealous.  This was the first time I became aware of my true feelings for
Bryce.  In my bed, with my pillows soaked of tears, I decided that since
Bryce obviously care's for Mike, and Mike cares for Bryce, who am I to tell
Bryce what I feel for him NOW.  I decided I would let them be happy and try
to get back my one true love.

copyright 2002