Date: Sun, 31 Aug 2008 07:32:47 -0700 (PDT)
From: JMH <trandar2002@yahoo.com>
Subject: Circle the Noun Chapter 39

Back at the house, Aidan was in Robert's office.  "You wanted to see me?"

"Yes? I want you to look at these pictures."

Aidan saw the vanilla envelop on the desk and opened to find a series of
medical films all showed nearly the same thing.  "Have you told Josh yet?"

"No?and how can I? better I go away on a business trip and have this thing
handled.

"This "thing" as you call it might take more time then a simple business
trip.  There are also the sexual effects."

"That is where you come in? now that I know you are clean."

"I thought you just wanted me to act as his friend-slash-therapist"

"Now I want you to be his lover? or at least one of them."

"You mean share Josh?"  Aidan said unsure.

"I am eight years older then he is.  I am out of shape and? and?"

"Say the word Robert? you must admit the truth to yourself if you are going
to aact on it."

"I have cancer? Alright, there I said it."

"You have mid-stage prostate cancer is what it is."

"I know."

"You will have to have most of your prostate removed and undergo radiation
and chemo.  This will take months."

"Months for Josh to fall madly in love with you!"

"Robert? JOSH LOVES YOU!"

"And he always will.  But what if I don't make it?.  What if I die?  What
would happen to my?"  Robert tried to argue as he broke down into tears.

"Robert? I am not some puppy you buy your child when the first one starts
getting too old and sick."

"Yes you are Aidan.  Yes you are a therapist, which means you can
understand Josh and the terrible sadness that takes over him.  You are also
a doctor, and can help Josh understand what I am going through.  You are
more handsome than I ever was and unlike me, Josh is able to go out and
have fun with you.  In fact I believe my Josh is already in love with you
in his own way."

"But not the way he loves you."

"Yes? Josh and I love each other in a way that is very profound.  We did
not make love to each other for over a dozen years but our love was just as
passionate as it is today.  Even if I lose my ability to have sex with
Josh? I will still be able to make love to him in the way we did for those
dozen years we pretended we were not lovers."

"So you want me to be his sex toy?"

"Don't you?"

"?Yes, you got me.  I am in love with your Josh but I will not go about
trying to replace you.  Josh is yours till the day you die? Me? I guess I
will be more of a consort or sexual companion."

"No Aidan? you will be a lot more.  You are my replacement.  I will not
make the move with Josh to San Diego. I will take care of things here."

Aidan shook his head.  "You are going to break his heart? just like you did
when you caught syphilis.  If you can't have all of Josh you want none of
him."

"No Aidan that is not it... I want what Josh and I had to remain perfect in
both our minds.  These past months have been the best in my life.  I want
these to be the last memories I have."

Suspecting something Aidan looked down on the date of the films. "These are
a year old!"

"Yes?"  Robert nodded guilty.

"How sick are you!"  Aidan demanded.

"More than I look? I have even taken to using steroids to hide things from
Josh."

"You idiot? if you got treatment a year ago? you could have stood a good
chance at living!"

"If I had gone into treatment? Josh would not have made it."  Robert
replied as he took out a large thick file.

"What is this?"

"Josh's psych file. .  I had Mrs. Williams steal them for me.  The year
before Andrew left him Josh tried to kill himself, that was how unhappy he
was with his marriage."

Aidan began reading Josh's file?  He learned of the death of his parents,
the abuse of his adoptive ones, his marriage, the suicide attempt and the
problem admitting he was gay.  Then there were the bouts of depression that
would come and go with Josh running to me each time.  Aidan? I did not go
into the hospital because Josh was in the middle of one of his depressions
and needed me.  My life was the only thing I could give Josh to save his."

"But from what I am reading he will kill himself before letting you die!"

"That is why Josh needs you now.  I have to go to the hospital if I am
going to live but Josh must not know this.  You need to take care of him
till I am better or?"

"Or you are dead."  Aidan replied bitterly.

"Answer me this? do you or do you not love my Josh."

"I do not know if it is love in the sense of what you and he have but I
find him? well I find him amazing.  He is such a strong father but also a
gentle person.  You are right when you say he needs taking care of.  Can I
also say that I want that ass of his."

"You can? it is a perfect one at that."

"How Andrew could have left it I will never understand."  Aidan laughed.
"When are you leaving?"

"Tonight?."

"Fine but I am going to tell Josh the truth.  He deservers that at the very
least."

"Agreed but only when I am gone."

"He is going to be mad."

"Good? that is the best time to try and seduce him? you will find that it
is easier to get him horny when he is angry."

"Really?"  Aidan grinned.

"Why don't you go see for yourself?  My car is already packed.  When I
leave this room I am leaving for the hospital.  Good luck.

"Good luck yourself? and you better come back or else."  Aidan warned.

"I will if I can."  Robert replied.

There was then a long awkward silence.  "Well I better go?"  Robert sighed.
He stood up and left the room.  Aidan then heard the sound of Robert's SUV
drive off.  He then stayed in Robert's, now his office, trying to think of
how he was going to explain things to Josh.

Realizing however there was no simple way to tell Jason, Aidan stood up and
made his way through the secret bookshelf door into Josh's room.  There he
found Josh studying a set of files.

"Aidan!"  Josh said surprised.

The bright smile on Josh's face was too much.  Aidan walked right up to
Josh pulled him up from his chair and pressed his lips against Josh's,
forcing his tongue into the older man's mouth.  At the same time Aidan let
his hands run down Josh's back until they were cupping his round ass.

Aidan's claiming of Josh seemed to do the trick as a tear ran down Josh's
face.  "Robert?"

"I am sorry Josh, but he has to take care of something.  He asked me to
take care of you though."

"Take care of me? I am almost twice your age."

"But you have a body that almost puts your son's to shame!"  Aidan laughed.

"But!"  Josh protested.

"Aidan put a hand over Josh's mouth, and did not let him speak until after
he had shown him how much he thought about Josh, and his body.  Exhausted
on the floor, and between wet kisses on Josh's neck and face, Aidan told
Josh all that Robert had told him.

"Damn him? he did it again."

"But this time he did it for you."

"But that makes it all my fault.  Why do I have to be sad! Why can't I
always be the happy person people see me as.

"Josh? you lost your whole family in a car accident.  That not only makes a
person sad but leaves them feeling as if they can be abandoned at any
moment.  Robert did not want you to feel that so he stayed when he needed
to go.  Now, he has no choice but to leave if he is going to have any life
with you.  But in truth I don't care about that as I want a life with you!
Josh? I am crazy, mad, insanely, in love with you!"  Aidan finally
confessed.

This led to a second round of love making this time ending with both men
falling asleep in each other's arms.  They were later found by Nate and
David who had both found notes left for them by Robert.  Seeing the near
desperate hold Josh had on Aidan, Nathan brought in a blanket and covered
his father's and Aidan's naked bodies.

"I'm sorry Nate."  David said once they were back in their room.

"No? Robert will come back if he can.  I do not know if I can look at Aidan
as a father but if he helps my father be happy then I can see him as a
uncle."

"No offense? but seeing those two together has? well, put me in the mood so
to speak."  David blushed.

"Aidan is? well, most men would not be able to say no to him."  Nathan
blushed as well.

"I was referring to your father.  I have never seen him naked before like
that.  He's?"

Nathan reached out and punched David on the shoulder.  "He is my father."

"And a wonderful man.  I now see why my father wanted him as a lover if I
were older I would have gone after your father as well."

"But you got me instead," Nate pointed out.

"That I did," David laughed.

The two young men then made love of their own? and it was good.

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