Date: Fri, 16 Jul 2004 15:58:02 -0700 (PDT) From: Cody mathews <codyjmathews@yahoo.com> Subject: the Courage To Be Me 7 DISCLAIMER: The following story DOES contain descriptions of sexual activities between teenage boys. If you are not over 18 years of age, or if you find this type of story offensive, or viewing this material is illegal where you are, then please DON'T READ IT! If you choose to read it, then please enjoy. Part of this is based upon actual events in my life but also upon dreams I have had of how I guess I wanted my life to be. I may also take moments from things that have happened to friends of mine. or even maybe bits from movies and TV shows, so if you see something you recognise then you are prolly right and I took it from there. I'm a slow writer but I will try and write a chapter once a week. Please enjoy. People's names will be changed to keep their identities a secret. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * The Courage To Be Me! Wow, I can't believe it! Loxley's gay! I was sure that I had imagined it, that he hadn't just told me he was gay, but, nope, he had and I wasn't dreaming! I tried to avoid seeing Neil at dinner time, he was bugging the shit out of me, and I was in a happy mood about Loxley, so I stayed in my room most of the evening. It must have been about 8 p.m. and I couldn't hold it any longer, I was ready to burst. I had to tell someone! I checked with my mom that it was okay to use the phone - she never asked who I was calling which suited me just fine. I closed my bedroom door, jumped on my bed and dialled the number and let it ring. After about three rings the phone was picked up and I heard the voice of the person I was dying to tell! "Hello?" came the voice from the other end of the line. "Oh my god, Joe, you are not going to believe what has happened today!" I said it so fast I don't think he understood a thing I said. "Charlie, calm down! What's wrong? What's happened? Are you ok?" he sounded worried. "What? Oh yeah, I'm fine. Guess what?" "Charlie, just tell me, what's happened?" "He's gay, Joe, he's gay!" "Who's gay?" "Loxley! We were talking today and he told me! He just came out with it!" "Aww, Charlie! Really? I bet your happy, right? So - are you going to make a move on him? He's all you talked aboutlast night." "It's not that easy, I can't just go up to him and say, 'I want you' !" "Ha ha, okay, well, no, you can't, not really, but maybe you could show him you're interested in him and take it from there? Charlie, you're friends with him and he probably told you for a reason. Maybe it's his way of showing you that he's interested in you and he's waiting for you to make a move on him." "You think so? We are friends!" "But maybe he's been scared, because you didn't know he was gay and now you know he's okay with showing signs. But you might have to show him you're gay too..." "He knows I'm gay." "He does?" "Yes, it sort of slipped out after he told me about him being gay." "Okay, well, that only makes me think that he told you because he trusts you and likes you. Look you can try it this way - when you're next hanging out with him just slip it into the conversation that you like him. Or suggest going out maybe on a date and see what he says?" "A DATE?!" "Don't sound so scared, it's what people do!" "And do what with him?" "Well I don't think that you're going to go back to his and fuck his brains out!" "JOE!" "Sorry, I was joking. Okay, well, go to see a movie or get something to eat. Just relax and hang out, but both knowing it's a date." "Okay, I can do that, yeah, I can do that." "Charlie, who are you trying to convince?" "Me I think. Nah, how hard can that be, right? I hang out with you all the time, it's no big deal!" "Right, and Charlie, you're not as shy as you think. I mean, look at the night we met, you left the club with me, a complete stranger!" "Well, I was scared that night." "So? You coped well and you got over it, you'll be fine!" "Charlie! Are you off that phone yet!" my mum yelled from the bottom of the stairs. "Not yet! Just hanging up!" "Well, hurry up then, don't be on it all night!" "I have to go, sorry, you know what my mum's like." "Charlie, I'm glad you called and happy it's working out for you. Let me know what happens, okay? I want all the little details." "Night, Joe." "Night, Charlie." With that we both hung up. I put the walkabout phone back on the hook downstairs, said goodnight to my mum and went to bed. I lay there a while just thinking of Loxley. Joe was right, just ask him out on a date and take it from there! I lay there a while and then fell asleep. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "Charlie, wake up, Charlie, please wake up, I want you, I need you!" I opened my eyes to see Loxley standing over the bed, naked. "What are you doing here?!" I yelled at him, sitting up in the bed and looking at him, trying hard to keep my eyes on his and not look up and down his very naked body. "Shhh, you'll wake everyone up! I couldn't sleep, I was thinking about you and, well, I want you." "You want me!? How did you get in?" "Don't worry yourself with that right now," he said climbing in next to me whispering, "Charlie I want you - now!" I opened my arms to his and he kissed me as we fell inevitably back into the bed . His response was instant. His hands explored and stroked my body. His hard cock pressed against the hollow in my belly. He tugged at my boxers and together we managed to get them down without our lips parting. I became free to allow his smooth warm body to move over mine. Unhindered, we reacted as we should, with impulsive burning desire. There could be only one conclusion. The senses came alive. I touch, hear, smell, taste and see the guy in my arms. What will follow, must follow. There's no order or plan to it. It is what it is. Nothing can be better, surely? He licks my chest, my belly, my thighs and then the full length of my cock. He opens his mouth, and takes me in. Oh god! I'm ready to explode! But then, perfectly scripted, he moves his attention to the cheeks of my ass, his body asking mine to turn. He's licking, gently biting. Never have I felt a tongue do that. Moving so that his body covers mine, I feel his cock slide between my legs. He first senses my delight and then, he enters me. I cannot hold back! I have to let go! I must cum! I am cumming! Suddenly I'm sitting bolt upright in my bed! I'm soaked with sweat, I'm breathing heavily and, I hate to say it but.... my sheets are wet - but not with sweat.! Wow! Never, before or since, have I had a dream as intense as that one!! ***************************** *************************** ************************** I hope you liked it and I will start on the next one very soon. Your comments are welcome, Please address emails subject as "Charlie" Thanks!