Date: Tue, 12 Apr 2016 16:23:03 +0000
From: "Ed Hamner (via Google Docs)" <heyham88@gmail.com>
Subject: Crashing into love - chapter 3

I ran up the stairs to Benji's room.  I tried to storm into the room, but I
found the door locked.


"Ben- open the door," I called to him while knocking.


"Go away," He yelled back.


"Benjamin, open the damn door" I yelled out, now starting to bang on the
door instead.


The door swings open and a very upset looking Benji stands there.


`What the hell, why won't you leave me alone," he yells in my face.


"I am your best friend and I'd like to know what happened back there."


"I screwed up.  I shouldn't have done that.  Now you are going to be mad at
me and I just messed things up," He answered back, starting to calm down.


"Ben, you think I am mad?" I looked at him as he went to fall down back on
his bed.  I walked over to the bed and sit down next to him.  "Quite the
opposite actually."


I put my hand on his shoulder and he started to relax.  I moved the hand to
his cheek and he leaned into it.


"You aren't the only one to feel that way.  I always thought you were
straight, and I never thought you would ever want me.  I mean, we are like
brothers."


"I don't know, I have had these feeling about you for so long," he looked
down at his feet, "I didn't think it was anything, but this last year since
that football game, I just thought maybe it would be different.  I also
thought maybe if I said something, it would ruin our friendship."


I picked up his face again and looked him deep in his emerald eyes, "Ben,
nothing will ever ruin our friendship.  You are my best friend and always
will be.  This just makes it all the better, because when I say `I love
you', you can finally realize that I mean it with all my heart."


This time I was the one to pull him closer and pushed my lips against his.
The second kiss was just as amazing as the first.  I pushed him back on the
bed and straddled his waist.  I was not going to let this opportunity pass
us up.  Once both stopped to get air, I couldn't help but to run my hand
through his hair as I gently pecked his lips between breaths.


"Now ... do ... you... feel... better?" I asked, spacing my words out with
kisses


"Only on one condition," he stared at me with his gorgeous eyes, "Does this
mean you want to give this a try?"


"I don't know.  I mean what's in it for me?" I jokingly asked.


"This," he said as he pulls me close for another kiss.


As we pulled apart, I said, "One more thing."


Benji looked up at me with his best puppy dog eyes.  I stared deeply into
those eyes and let them peer into my soul.


"Benjamin Zachary Allen, will you be my boyfriend?"


Benji just smiled. Benji never smiled like this, it was a smile that lit up
everything around it, as bright as the sun.  I leaned back down and gave
him another kiss.  I was happy to know that I was part of the reason for
his best smile.


----------


Benji and I finally managed to get ourselves in check.  We had decided that
it was only fair that we set some ground rules to make sure we didn't rush
into anything we would regret.


Rule 1 - We are best friends.  Just because we are dating, does not mean we
are not best friends.


*ding* new text message from Lexie


Lexie: And???


Connor: What?


Lexie: Did you talk to him?


I looked at Ben.  I should tell him that I told Lexie.


"Ben, we need to tell Lex." I said to him.


"Um... I would think so, I mean if we don't she'd kick our asses.  You know
how much she scares me."


I honestly didn't think he would be willing to be so open so fast, but then
again, this was Lexie we were talking about.


Lexie: ....


Connor: I did


Lexie: And?


Connor: I think we figured it out.


Lexie: Connor Evans, I swear you don't tell me what is going on I am going
to find you and kick your ass.


Then it struck me the best way to get the point to Lexie.  I looked at Ben.


"Kiss me."  I told him, "I am going to take a selfie and send it to her."


I held up the phone and he kissed me.  For a moment, I forgot that I was
taking a photo.  I felt Ben's hand travel down my arm and wrap his hand
around the hand I was holding my phone with. I heard the sound of the
camera click.  He pulled off of me and we looked at the photo.  It was the
best photo we had ever taken.


"Send that to me too," he whispered in my ear, before trailing down my neck
with light kisses.


Connor: *1 Attachment*


Lexie: WTH... is that you and Ben?


Connor: What do you think?


Lexie: Where are you guys?


Connor: His house


Lexie: I'm coming over


"We are in trouble now," I said while giving Benji a look of fear, "she's
coming to get us."


Benji just laughed, "Why don't we go down stairs and give her an eye full
when she comes in."


He gave me a devilish grin and pulled my hand.  Who was I to deny him his
fun.  With that grin, who was I to ever deny him anything.


----------


Lexie stormed into the house to find Benji strattled over my lap while we
were making out on the couch.  The sound she made when she came into the
room was hard to put into words.  Benji pulled himself away from my lips
and looked at her with this amazing shit eating grin.


"Hey Lex," he greets her through his grin, "how's it going?"


Lexie struggled to find the words to articulate her thoughts.  She
stuttered speechlessly for what seemed like a good five minutes before she
finally found the words.


"What the hell is this?" She yelled out, sounding almost annoyed.


Ben looked at her, rather matter-of-factly and replied, "I believe this is
what is called making out, and it is what one does with their boyfriend
when they have the desire and time to do so."  Lexie shoots me a look, I
just smile at her.


I put my hands on Benji's waist and simply replied, "and if he wants to
stay my boyfriend, he better get back down here because my lips are getting
lonely."


Benji leaned down and started to kiss me again.  I could see Lexie out of
the corner of my eye.  She had this look of disdain at the sight in front
of her.  I turned my face toward her and away from the onslaught which was
Ben's lips.  While I turned away he took the initiative to start nibbling
on my ear, which was newly presented to him.


"Ben, I think we have tortured her enough," I whispered to Benji.


He pulled away again, albeit reluctantly, and I rotated to deposit him back
on the couch.  I got up and made my way to Lexie, who still was mortified
standing in the entryway to the living room.  I pulled her into a hug.


"I think we figured it out."  I whispered in her ear.


"Apparently," was all she said.


She made her way to the chair on the other side of the room and just glared
at Benji.  I walked back to the couch and sat down.  Benji was like an
adorable puppy and crawled up into my lap, where I just wrapped my arms
around his waist.


"So is this why you broke up with Brittan?"  She started to interrogate
Benji.


"Yeah, I just didn't think your playing suck face with Brandon last night
would drive me to this point.  So I owe you one."


I peered out from behind Benji, "So do I."


"So how is this going to work?"  She asked looking at us.  "Are you two
officially together or what?"


I looked up to Benji on my lap and he bends down to give me a quick peck on
the lips.


"Yeah, I think we are official."  I said, feeling Benji intertwine his
fingers into mine.


After a good hour getting Lexie out of shock, it had gotten dark, and I
knew that I needed to head home.  Benji walked me out to my truck and gave
me a nice long kiss before I hopped in.  I roll down the window to look at
him.


"I'll text you when I get home.  Tomorrow, how about we go out?"


"Sounds good."  He said, planting another gentle kiss on my lips.


"I love you Benji"


"I love you too Connor."


----------


The drive home was nice, just remembering the feeling of Ben's lips against
mine.  It was amazing and I know we both were excited to see where this
would go.  Everyone knows that the goal is to fall in love with your best
friend, and that is what I intended to do.


I came to a red light and stopped.  The weather has turned after dark and
it was beginning to rain.  I just wanted to get home and call Benji before
I would inevitably fall asleep, with hope to have nice dreams of the boy I
now got to call mine.


The light changed to green and I started to pull out into the intersection.
What happens next comes in flashes.


I see lights coming from my side, then I feel the impact.  I could feel
that the force of the impact had flipped my truck on its side, felt the
feeling of the shattered glass from the window hitting my face.  I remember
hitting my head on the bar of the truck.  I felt my truck stop moving,
still on its side, the voice from the collision alert calling out to me,
and it all fades to black.


After that, the images come in waves.  I remember waking up to someone
calling out to me, then the sound of something over my head, but it all
fades back to black.


I come around again to someone flashing a light in my eyes, the sights of
people bustling around me in the brightly lit room.  My head and left leg
hurt so bad, I wanted to scream out in pain, but no noise would come out.
I remember a smiling nurse looking down at me, and again, it all fades to
black.


I was back in Benji's room, I called out to Benji, but he wasn't there.  I
ran down the stairs to find Benji sitting on the couch.  Again I called out
to him, but he didn't respond.  I walked around the couch to face him.  He
was crying.


"You know it was all a lie.  Connor was never my friend.  If he was, he
wouldn't have toyed with me.  He didn't need to lead me on."


"Ben, I never lead you on," I called out to him, but he didn't even look
up.


"At least he won't bother me anymore."


Ben got up from the couch and walking into the other room.  For a moment, I
stood there stunned, and decided to follow him.  When I stepped into the
doorway, I was in the field behind my house where I was met by Lexie and
Ben.


"At least he's gone now," Lexie said to Ben.  "You two never should have
been."


I felt a tugging feeling, like my belly button was attached to a rope and
it was being yanked behind me.  All I wanted to do was to reach out and
comfort Benji and let him know I was right there.  All I felt was the pull,
then back into nothing.


----------


I could hear the sound of beeping.  I wanted to open my eyes but they felt
glued shut; I wanted to move but I couldn't get my body to do it.


Outside the sounds of the beeping, I could hear a sliding door slide open.
I felt the sensation of a hand pick mine up.


"Hey Connor, they say maybe today you can hear us.  You didn't text me
back," the voice said, the tones of sadness at the forefront.  "Your folks
are really worried, and Lexie keeps texting me trying to find out what is
going on with you.  It's been nearly a week and no one can tell us
anything."


`A week?  I have been here for a week.  I need to get up, I need to get out
of here.  I need to comfort Benji.'


"Will you come back to me?  I need you so much man.  You are my best friend
and now my boyfriend.  This is not how I expected to spend my first week
with you."


`I'm hurting him, I never wanted to hurt him.'


"I don't want to lose you," The voice sounded like a whisper, but I could
tell, the words were flowing with tears. "Just open your eyes and let me
know you can hear me, let me know you will never leave me."

I could feel the soft caress of a hand against my cheek, wished more than
anything that I could move my hands up to put them on to the warm,
shivering hand.

I tried to fight to open my eyes, but I couldn't.  I wanted to move my hand
to just show that I heard, but my hand wouldn't move.

I wanted to reach out and grab and hold him.  I wanted to let him know I
was there and that I didn't want to go anywhere.  I felt something on my
lips -- they were his lips, he was kissing me.  I could hear him start to
shuffle out the door.

The voice got closer, "I am in love with you and I want to spend my life
with you."

I willed my eyes to open, I willed my hand to move, I willed my voice to
call out.

"I ... Love ... You ... Too," it was all I could do to barely screech it
out.

I could hear him turn around and come back to the bed, quickly grabbing my
hand.

"Please say something again; please tell me I wasn't hearing things."

"I...Love... you"