Date: Tue, 18 Mar 2008 22:10:51 -0700 (PDT)
From: Ryan West <ryanwest25@yahoo.com>
Subject: Diving In

Diving In

Chapter 14: The Past and the Pending

The following chapter takes a look back at the past of the characters in
this story.

Four Years ago
Cameron- Age 13

      Cameron Wright had started to realize that he was different than the
other boys in the 8th grade class of Mineola Middle School. He didn't
really like sports all that much, he didn't like partying all that much,
but more importantly he didn't like girls all that much.  Yes, Cameron
Wright was slowly discovering that he was in fact gay.
      He started to realize this when he was 12 when he first started
masturbating. Travis McCarthy would always tell him what porn websites to
check out, but no matter how many times Cameron tried he couldn't get
himself to cum while watching any of them. However, when he imagined some
of the other boys from the locker room he came right away.
      So, Cameron wasn't exactly sure how to approach this situation. He
couldn't tell anyone, no, he had seen how the jocks and other asshole felt
about gay guys. One day, while surfing the internet he came across a forum
for gay teens like himself. He created a username and password, and started
to talk about the issues he was having on the message boards.
      Things were going well for a while until Cameron received a message
on his forums account. The message was from a man, named Mark, who wrote
the following:

Dear Cameron,

My name is Mark Armen, I am a twenty-nine year old gay man who gives advice
to teens like you on these forums. However, it can be hard for you teens to
talk about everything on these types of things, so I am offering some help,
if you want it. You can e-mail me you're fears and problems and I can give
you the best advice I can. I don't know if this is what you're looking for,
but if you are, feel free! Hope to talk to you soon!

From,
Mark

	Cameron wasn't really sure out to react to this e-mail. He didn't
see the harm in e-mailing him. So Cameron e-mailed him back, telling him a
little bit about himself.
	This continued for one month, back and forth. Cameron actually got
to know Mark pretty well. Mark was twenty-nine and lived only a few towns
over from Cameron with his boyfriend, Steve. They had been dating since
high school and were very happy together. Steve was a writer and Mark was a
salesman for a company nearby. Cameron grew to trust Mark.
	In one of their conversations, Mark mentioned that he had a boat,
and Cameron thought this was the coolest thing ever. He had never been on a
boat before, well he actually had been on one before but it was when he was
very young. Mark said that when it got nicer out that he would take Cameron
out on it.

...

Six Months Ago
Alex- Age 16

	Alex Lucas lay on her bed in her laced bra and underwear, sweating
and panting. She wiped the sweat off her forehead. Travis McCarthy
collapsed next to her, completely naked, panting. They both just lay out of
breath for a few moments, before Travis turned to her and smiled.
	"That was fun," He laughed. She looked at him and started laughing
also. She pulled him close and kissed him on the lips, then rested her
hands on his chest. They just lay there for a moment. "I should probably
get going," Travis sighed after a few moments.
	"What? Where to?" Alex asked.
	"I told Cameron I'd hang out with him," Travis sat up and grabbed
his boxers and slid them past his ass. He then began to look for his jeans
and t-shirt, but couldn't quite remember where he took it off. "Did you
throw my..."
	"All right, just um..." Alex sat up. "Maybe we could meet up later
tonight, tickets go on sale for the New Pornographers tonight..."
	"Yeah, that sounds good," Travis stuck his head under the bed and
finally saw his shirt and threw it on. "All right, call me later." Travis
jumped into his jeans, kissed Alex on the forehead and headed for the door.
	"Hey wait," Alex called.
	"What's up?" He answered.
	"I just uh..." Alex didn't quite know how to phrase this. "I just
wanted to let you know that I'm really happy about...this, about
us. I'm...I'm happy." She smiled. Travis didn't quite know how to respond.
	"Yeah, me too," Travis smirked then closed the door and left.
	After Travis left, Alex spent the rest of the day working on
homework and listening to a few new band demo tapes. She liked having
Saturdays to herself, especially considering the fact that her mother
wasn't home. Her father and mother worked at the same firm and worked every
day of the week except for Sunday.
	However, soon her mother and father came home together. They did
their usual routine. Her mother went into the kitchen and started to make
dinner while her father went to his room and took a nap. However, today
something was different.
	"Alexis, can you come down for a second?" Her mother called. Alex
was taken by surprise, and she came down only out of curiosity.
	"Yeah?" Alex asked as she came into the kitchen.
	"Why hello to you too," She turned around. "So, Mrs. Murtha said
she saw a boy leaving here today..." Alex felt her face getting red.
	"She's crazy...I don't know what..." Alex started to defend
herself.
	"Look, cut the crap, I know he was here," Her mother snapped. "I
told you to stop seeing him, and I'm not going to tell you again. This is
your final warning."
	"Or what?" Alex got defensive.
	"Or...you're out of here." Her mother stated.
	"You're going to kick me out for seeing someone? Are you serious
right now?" Alex rolled her eyes.
	"He's bad news, Alexis." She warned. "And yes, I'd kick you out."
	"Well, guess what?" Alex snapped. "I'll start looking for an
apartment." And with that she went up the stairs, leaving her mother
stunned.

...

Two Years Ago
James- Age 14

      James Winters watched Kevin Trainer catch the ball in his stick and
sprint towards the goal. He passed three players from the other team, but
he was beginning to be overwhelmed.
      "Winters!" Kevin called. James was taken out of his trance when he
saw the lacrosse ball flying towards him. His reflexes took hold of him and
he thrusted his stick up quickly to catch the ball. Now, with no one in
front of him he ran towards the goal and shot it quickly, scoring just in
time to hear the last buzzer ring. He had won the game for the team.
Everyone crowded and around him and jumped on him, slapping his helmet.
After countless pats on the back, he finally found Kevin.
      "You know that was all me, right?" Kevin smiled as he removed his
helmet. Kevin's hair was very short, as it was all of sophomore year. James
thought Kevin looked better when it was long.
      "Psh, yeah right." James pushed Kevin. James also took off his
helmet.  His curly hair was drenched in sweat, he had been in practically
all game.
      "I'm still sleeping over tonight, all right?" Kevin told. He had
explained to James earlier in the week that his parents were going away and
they wanted him to stay at a friends for the night.
      "Yeah, sure. No problem." James shrugged as they both headed towards
the locker room. James had developed a crush on Kevin the past year. They
had been friends their entire lives, but this development was recent. James
had only come to terms that he was gay a couple months before and ever
since then he had seen Kevin in a different light. It didn't help that
Kevin was absolutely gorgeous. He had the perfect body, masculine face,
dark eyes. And from what James had seen in the locker room, he was packing
some heat. However, besides friendship, Kevin had shown no signs of
romantic interest.
      "I need to talk to you about something, also." Kevin said. "It's kind
of private so don't say anything."
      "What is it?" James blushed.
      "I'll talk to you about it later, I don't want anyone hearing me."
Kevin muttered as he headed into the locker room. James' mind started to
fantasize about what Kevin had to tell him as he approached his
locker. Could it be true? Could Kevin have feelings for him as well? This
could be the night, and James couldn't wait.

Six Months Ago
Kieran Wilmer- Age 16

	Kieran Wilmer sat alone at lunch. It was a typical situation for
him. He used the time productively; he sat with his science homework in
hand with his textbook, finishing up so he would have more free time later
that night. However, this wasn't the only thing he was doing.
	Everyday he sat in the same exact seat, at the same exact table, in
the same exact corner of the cafeteria. He sat there because it was in the
perfect position to watch Marissa Tampa's table. She sat with Meghan
O'Halloran, Darcy Granger, Kevin Trainer, and Max Greco everyday. He
watched her laugh at one of Max's comments, and seductively touch Kevin's
arm. He hated both of them. He wanted to be them. Why wasn't she touching
his arm?
	Kieran worshipped Marissa, everything about her. He had ever since
they worked on a project together when they were younger. He prayed every
night that they would be together, but to no avail. He finished up his
sandwich and headed over to his most dreaded class. Gym.
	Kieran walked to his locker, unnoticed by any of the other kids
changing for class. He opened it up and removed his shirt. He was
abnormally skinny, and his ribs were poking out from under his skin. His
veins were visible. It wasn't that he didn't eat, because he ate just as
much as everyone else. He just had so many medical issues that he was
taking up to twelve pills each day, some of which affected his appetite.
	As Kieran was getting ready, he saw Max Greco open his locker. He
watched as Max took off his shirt. Max's body was sculpted perfectly, his
biceps were huge. He looked like a young Abercrombie model. Kieran wondered
how the hell he got his body to look like that. Suddenly Max caught Kieran
watching him.
	"What the fuck you looking at faggot?" Max sneered. Kieran looked
down, immediately avoiding eye contact. "I said, what are you looking at?"
Max walked over to Kieran.
	"Nothing! Sorry," Kieran begged.
	"That's what I thought." Max turned around and went back to
changing.
	What a prick, Kieran thought to himself. He then put his sneakers
on and headed over to the gym.

...

Six Months Ago
Travis - Age 16

	Travis sat on Cameron's bed tossing a beanie bag up in the
air. After Travis left Alex's house, he had gone over to Cameron's to hang
out with him. They had been hanging out all day but Travis wanted to head
out.
	"Come on, let's just check it out." Travis said as he threw the
ball up.
	"No, why would I want to go?" Cameron sighed. "I don't even have a
fake I.D."
	"This bar doesn't even card, dude." Travis pleaded. "It's going to
be fun, we'll get wasted and pass out at my house. My mom won't care."
	"Didn't you say you were supposed to hang out with Alex tonight?"
Cameron asked.
	"Yeah, but whatever I was with her all yesterday." Travis
shrugged. "C'mon."
	"No, sorry, I have homework," Cameron said.
      "You're lame," Travis sighed and then got up and left. He went
downstairs and hopped in his car. He drove immediately to the bar, clever
titled The Thirsty Scholar. He parked his car in the back. Before going in
he reached into his glove compartment and pulled out his pipe and filled it
with the weed he had bought earlier that week. He lit a bowl and smoked for
a few moments before heading inside.
      The bar already was filled with people even though it was only seven
o'clock. The night was still young. He ordered a Jack and Coke and sipped
it slowly. He noticed a girl with short blonde hair, probably about twenty,
eyeing him from across the bar. He avoided eye contact.
      Travis had been raised by his mother all his life. He had never met
his father in person. He left the family before Travis was born. His father
had tried to contact him a few times but Travis refused. His mother always
would say "You're just like you're father!" every time he would do
something wrong. Sometimes he wondered if that was true, if he was just
like his father.
      `I'm really happy with us', Alex's words still rang in his ears. This
freaked him out a lot. He didn't want there to be any "us". He never agreed
to any "us". He wanted to be by himself. He liked Alex, he really did. She
was hot, cool, and had an awesome taste in music. But at the same time, he
was completely freaked out by her. To be fair, they'd been hooking up for a
couple months, but that's it. They never said "We're boyfriend and
girlfriend." He hated that shit. He took another sip from his drink and
looked at the girl on the other end of the bar.
      He got up from his chair and took a seat next to the blonde.
      "Hey," Travis smirked.
      "Hey kid," the blonde smiled back. "You eighteen?"
      "Twenty- two, babe." Travis grinned.
      Travis knew what he was about to do was wrong, but at the same time
he knew he couldn't change who he was.

...

Two Years Ago
James- Age 14

	James and Kevin sat at the Winters kitchen table finishing up the
last of the Domino's pizza that they had ordered.
	"See I told you Domino's is better than Ralph's," Kevin smiled.
	"Yeah, you're right." James agreed.
	James' parents had already headed off to bed and his sister was out
at some party, so they had the house to themselves. Kevin hadn't brought up
the mysterious topic yet, but James didn't want to push it.
	"You want to head upstairs? Maybe watch a movie or something?"
James suggested.
	"Yeah, sure." Kevin said.
	They both ran up the stairs and went to James' room. James' mother
had already set up an air-mattress on the floor for Kevin to sleep
in. Kevin plopped down onto the air-mattress, while James took a seat on
the bed. They both just lay in silence for a moment.
	"So, what did you, uh, want to talk about?" James tried as best he
could to casually bring up, but it still sounded rather blunt.
	"Oh right," Kevin remembered. "It's nothing really..."
	"Oh..." James didn't want to sound overexcited.
	"Do you think I could fuck Marissa Tampa?" Kevin asked.
	"What?" James was surprised and dismayed by the question.
	"Do you think I could? I mean she flirts with me all the time. And
Oh god, she's just so fucking hot." Kevin moaned. "Her tits are
amazing. Remember when she was wearing that low cut shirt last week? Oh
man."
	"Yeah..." James rolled over in his bed.
	"So? Do you?" Kevin asked.
	"Yeah, sure. Why wouldn't she?" James shrugged.
	"Yeah," Kevin thought for a moment. "She's really cool too. I mean,
she's kind of a bitch, but different than the other stupid girls. Like
Meghan. She said you were hot by the way. Meghan, that is."
	"Oh really?" James faked enthusiasm.
	"Yeah," Kevin said. "You should get with her. Seriously."
	"Maybe," James sighed.
	"Oh, turn on ESPN, I want to see the recaps of the game." Kevin
told him.
	James did as told, but his mind began to drift elsewhere. He was so
sick of this shit. He was sick of being let down, sick of not having
anyone. It was annoying because James knew that he would be a great
boyfriend. He had so much to give, but no one to give it to.  He couldn't
believe that everything that he had with Kevin had only been in his own
head. It was all bullshit. Bull shit.

...

Four Months Ago
Max Greco- Age 17

	Max Greco had too much to drink. He was completely wasted and
completely alone. He was sitting in his room by himself, drunk off his
mind. His eyes were red. He had been crying while he drank.
	He knew he was gay. At this point, there was no denying it. He
couldn't be a faggot though. He just couldn't. His entire life was planned
out in front of him. He would follow in the foot steps of his two
brothers. He would go to the Naval Academy, meet a girlfriend and marry
her. That was the plan. He couldn't fuck it up.
	But he couldn't change it, no matter how much he tried. Which was
why his latest resort was alcohol. He had just been surfing the internet
looking for porn, when he found himself watching gay porn, again. He turned
it off and slapped himself. Idiot. He couldn't be doing that anymore. He
would just ignore it. If he ignored it, it might go away. Who know's, it
might even be a phase. However, deep down he knew it wasn't.
	Max had left school early that day. He hadn't been feeling that
well, and he wanted to be by himself. However, this also resulted in him
being cooped up in his room all day.
	He need to get out of his room, out of the house. He slammed his
door and stumbled down the stairs and out the door. He hopped in his car
and swerved away. This wasn't the first time that Max had driven under the
influence; in fact it was far from it. He had gotten pretty good at drunk
driving, mostly from practice. After a few blocks, he decided to drive by
the school.
	The car drove down the empty street leading up to the school. Max
only then realized that he had completely forgotten to switch on his
lights. He leaned forward trying to remember how to turn on the lights and
fiddled with a few buttons. He looked up just in time to see a frightened
kid, Kieran Wilmer, staying at him. He tried to stop in time, but it was
too late. The car hit Kieran going at full speed.
	Max stopped the car for a moment in disbelief. He had just hit a
kid. Holy shit. Was he dead? He didn't have time to think. He looked to his
left and saw James Winters rushing towards the car. He put his foot on the
break and quickly sped off without thinking.
	He drove back to his house closed the door and collapsed onto his
bed. What had he done?

...

Six Months Ago
Alex- Age 16

	Alex looked around the empty apartment that looked out onto the
beach. Although the apartment itself wasn't very luxurious, the location
was amazing. She turned towards the real estate agent.
	"It's amazing," Alex smiled.
	"I know," The agent smiled. "If you want it, I can talk to the
owner right away. I think we have a very good shot at getting it." Alex
thought for a moment.
	"All right, let's do it." Alex decided.
	"Okay! Well we just have to fill out..." As the agent was talking,
Alex felt her phone vibrate. She reached into her pocket and saw that it
was Travis calling.
	"Hey babe," Alex face brightened up. "Yeah, I'll see you there in
twenty."  She turned toward the agent. "Sorry, it's my boyfriend. Um, can
we talk about this later. I'll swing by and pick up the paperwork
tomorrow."
	"Yeah sure, I'll contact the owners." The agent waved as Alex
hopped into her car and sped off to meet Travis.
	Travis sat on the hood of his car in the school parking lot. He had
been sitting there for the past two hours, contemplating his next move. He
wasn't sure how to approach the situation. Alex pulled up her car next to
Travis. She opened the door and sat next to Travis on his good, kissing him
on the cheek.
	"Hey babe," she smiled. "So, I got the most amazing apartment, in
the entire world. It's overlooking the beach, and it's in my pay range! I
can pay for it by working at the Downtown and doing some other after school
job I'm so happy!"
	"That's great," Travis forced a smile.
	"What's wrong?" Alex placed a hand on Travis' leg.
	"Nothing, nothing." Travis looked away from her.
	"C'mon, talk to me," Alex said.
	"Seriously...it's..." Travis thought for a moment. "Look, I can't
do this anymore."
	"What?" Alex was taken aback.
	"You're a really awesome girl, and I've had a lot of fun...but..."
Travis started.
	"Are you kidding me right now?" Alex asked. "Just like that? That's
it? What the fuck happened?"
	"Nothing happened," Travis lied. "I just don't want to be in a
relationship."
	"Well thanks for telling me now, after I fucking told my mom that
I'm moving out, and after I found an apartment." Alex yelled.
	"I'm sorry," Travis avoided eye contact.
	"No, tell me why." Alex teared up. "Tell me why you're doing this."
	"I..." Travis started.
	"We were best friends before we started dating, Travis," Alex
interrupted. "I can understand you doing this to some bimbo, but not to
me."
	"I slept with someone else," Travis blurted.
	"What?" Alex was in shock.
	"I said I..." Travis repeated.
	"I fucking heard you," Alex ran her fingers through her hair. "Who
was she?"
	"Just some girl...two girls, actually." Travis didn't look at her.
	"Look at me." Alex ordered. Travis didn't comply. "Look at me! Why
would you do this? Does this make you happy?"
	"No," Travis shook his head. "I can't change who I am, Alexis."
	"Don't call me that," she said as she got into her car. She drove
away, leaving Travis by himself.

...

Four Years ago
Cameron- Age 13

	Cameron waited on a bench by the dock. He had called a cab and paid
for it with money he stole from his mother. He sat, nervous about how Mark
would look and act. He wore a white t-shirt, with a blue bathing suit, just
like Mark had told him too. Cameron looked around for a guy wearing a blue
button down.
	As he sat looking around, he heard a voice call his name. He turned
around to see a guy in a blue button down and sunglasses. This was Mark.
	"Mark?" Cameron nervously asked.
	"Hey!" Mark smiled and extended a hand. "We finally meet!" Cameron
stood up and shook his hand.
	"I was getting a little nervous," Cameron smiled.
	"Thought I wouldn't show up?" Mark laughed. "C'mon let me show you
my boat. It's right down at the end of the dock."
	They walked down to the end of the dock and Cameron saw the motor
boat. It looked fantastic. It had a small sitting area in the back and then
a cabin.
	"Wow! Awesome!" Cameron exclaimed as he jumped on board.
	"Yeah, it's a great ship." Mark agreed. "Here, take a seat and
we'll head out to sea." Cameron sat down on one of the cushioned sides of
the boat as Mark headed into the cabin and pulled the boat out of the
harbor. The boat drove out into the sea, almost to the point where the
harbor was no longer visible. Mark stepped out of the cabin.
	"This is amazing," Cameron smiled.
	"I know isn't it cool," Mark looked around at the sea.
	"How close is this to your house?" Cameron asked.
	"Um, the docks about ten minutes give or take away from my house,"
Mark shrugged. He took off his sunglasses to reveal two nice blue
eyes. "How about you?"
	"Um, it was only a twenty minute cab ride," Cameron answered.
	"Oh, so we're close by," Mark said.
	"Where's Steve?" Cameron asked. Steve was Mark's boyfriend who Mark
had said would be coming.
	"Oh, Steve had to go away on business," Mark explained.
	"Business? I thought he was a writer?" Cameron wondered aloud.
	"Journalist," Mark said. "Want to go for a swim?" Cameron thought
about it for a moment.
	"Do you think it's dangerous?" Cameron asked.
	"No, I've been swimming in this place all the time," Mark
calmed. Mark took off his shirt to reveal his chest which was filled with
dark curly hair. He was a strong man, he had said that he worked out a
lot. He took off his pants, showing a blue Speedo underneath. He jumped off
the end of the boat. "You coming?"
	Cameron thought for a moment, and then took off his shirt. He was
somewhat scrawny, mostly because he wasn't finished going through
puberty. He still didn't have any hair under his armpits, nor was he
shaving. He hesitantly dove in the water next to Mark.
	The both swam around for a bit until they were tired and Mark
climbed up the side ladder and went to the cabin and got two
towels. Cameron grabbed one as he hopped onto the boat. They sat across
from each other.
	"So, you having fun, Cam?" Mark asked.
	"Yeah, absolutely." Cameron nodded. He dried himself off with the
towel.
	"I noticed you don't have any hair under those pits yet," Mark
pointed. Cameron blushed. "Don't worry it'll come."
	"Thanks..." Cameron awkwardly smiled.
	"Do you have any hair down there yet?" Mark nodded with his head,
referencing Cameron's pubic hair.
	"Yeah," Cameron's face turned red.
	"Yeah, I remember I got hair real young," Mark scratched his
chest. "Come sit over here." Cameron shrugged and sat down next to
Mark. "So have you experimented with any other guys yet?"
	"Nope," Cameron shook his head. Mark placed his hand on Cameron's
inner thigh, making him jump a little bit.
	"Don't worry, you will." Mark smiled. He moved his hand further and
further up Cameron's leg, until his hand was resting on Cameron's semi-hard
erection. Cameron jumped and got up immediately.
	"What are you..."  Cameron was shocked. "What are you doing?"
	"Nothing, just having a little fun, that's all..." Mark smiled.
	"What...what about Steve?" Cameron's heart was racing fast.
	"Oh..." Mark sighed. "Steve and I are on a break, we've been having
some trouble lately. Just sit back down next to me. I'm not gonna bite."
Cameron could hear his heart beat at this point.
	"There is no Steve is there?" Cameron came to the realization as he
said it.
	"What? Of course there..." Mark started. "Okay, look, there is no
Steve. I just told you that so you wouldn't think I was some creep..."
	"And you're not?" Cameron started backing up. "I'm a thirteen year
old kid and you're..."
	"Look..." Mark stood up. He too looked like he was panicing. "I
wasn't going to..."
	"I want to go home." Cameron shouted. "Take me home."
	"Look kid, just..."Mark walked toward him angrily. Cameron
panicked; he turned to the side of the boat jumped. "Cameron!"
	Cameron began to swim away from the boat as fast as he could. He
could hear Mark calling after him, but he didn't care. He needed to get
away.
	After a few minutes he began getting tired, he could feel his legs
giving way. He saw a boat in the distance. He tried to swim towards it, but
he didn't have enough energy. He began to tred water, but even that was too
hard. He soon went under, and everything went black.
	Cameron awoke on board the coast guard's ship. It had spotted him
purely by chance. If they had gotten there a second later, he would've been
dead. The coast guard called his parents, and Cameron lied and told them
that he had gone for a swim and swam too far out. They believed him, and
everything went back to normal. Cameron, however, had much more trouble
doing this. He couldn't go near water for the next four years. Until he met
James.

...

Present Day
James- Age17

	"What do you mean you killed him?" James blurted.
	"I killed him," Max cried. "I hit him with my car!" James was
trying to process what he was hearing. Was it Max driving the car that
night? He couldn't believe it.
	"Oh my God," James whispered.
	"Please, don't tell anyone!" Max moaned.
	"Keep you're voice down," James hissed. "Look, Max, I'm going to
have to drive you home."
	"Can't I stay here?!" Max asked.
	"No, you need to leave." James grabbed him by the arm. And pulled
him off the bed. Max wouldn't move. "You need to leave, Max!"
	"Please, just stay with...!" Max yelled. James put his hand over
Max's mouth. He then used all of his energy to lift Max up and take him
down the stairs and put him back into James' car. Max was passed out the
entire way back. James brought Max up to his room and lay him down on his
bed.
	James looked at Max for a moment before he left. All he saw was a
murderer.

Thank you so much for reading this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. I love
getting comments so please e-mail me at ryanwest25@yahoo.com