Date: Wed, 10 Aug 2011 14:56:50 -0400
From: Ronyx <ronyx@woh.rr.com>
Subject: Door Number Three   Chapter 3

The following is a work of fiction. Any similarities to anyone are purely
coincidental. The story is intended for a mature audience. It may contain
profanity and references to gay sex. If this offends you, please leave and
find something more suitable to read. The author maintains all rights to
the story. Do not copy or use without written permission. Write
ronyx@themustardjar.com with your comments. Ronyx is a prolific Nifty
author. Visit my personal website at www.themustardjar.com for more
stories.


Door Number Three      Chapter 3


When I got home, Billy and his friend, Lonnie, were playing basketball in
the driveway. Lonnie was a regular fixture at our house. He was almost like
having another brother around. Lonnie wasn't very athletic, but he and
Billy seemed to get along well. In fact, Lonnie was one of Billy's most
ardent fans. He attended all his baseball games and you could often hear
him shouting at the umpire if my brother struck out at bat.

"Wanna play?" Lonnie tossed me the ball. He was cute, but in a normal sort
of way. Nothing about him stood out. He was 5'8" tall and weighed about 130
pounds. His hair was cut rather short and he had a few pimples on his
face. He was just an average looking teenager. He made good grades in
school and he was a good influence on Billy. They'd often spend a couple of
hours in our bedroom working on homework assignments, which Billy probably
would not have done if he wasn't prodded by Lonnie to do so.

"Sure." I laid my book bag down and tossed the ball back to him. He smiled
and then dribbled past me, laying it in the basket.

"Lucky shot," I smiled. He went out of bounds and tossed me the
ball. Before it reached me, Billy ran from behind and grabbed it. He threw
it at the basket- nothing but rim.

"Yes!" He shouted as he fisted Lonnie.

"It's on!" I shouted as he tossed me the ball. For the next hour we played
a very physical game. I'd watched them play before, but I never noticed how
much they liked to touch each other as they guarded the basket. There was
always a hand on the back or waist. A couple of times I noticed my brother
place his hand on Lonnie's ass.

They also became physical with me about half way through the game. The more
we joked and kidded each other, it seemed like the more the contact
developed, especially Lonnie. A few times he reached out and felt my chest
when I dribbled toward him. When I'd go around, he'd reach out and place
his hands on my side.

On one occasion, as I was going toward the basket, he ran his hand across
my cock. At first I thought it was accidental, but he did it a few more
times afterwards. Once he even stepped back and smiled at me when I moved
away.

"I got to take a break," I announced as my body began to ache. I had
already run laps at school, so I was quickly becoming tired. I looked at
Billy and Lonnie. "You guys want something to drink?"

"Sure," responded Billy. "Can you bring us some iced tea?" He looked over
at Lonnie who nodded his approval.

I went into the kitchen for the drinks. It didn't appear that anyone else
was home. I got out three large glasses and went to the refrigerator and
took out a large pitcher of tea. It was a favorite in the Barnes' home and
Mom usually kept a fresh pitcher refrigerated.

As I stood at the counter, I looked out the window as Billy and Lonnie
continued to play. I was astonished when Lonnie went for a shot and my
brother reached around behind him and quickly squeezed his cock. Lonnie
turned and giggled and then shot the basketball. When Billy took the ball,
Lonnie did the same thing to him. It wasn't a hand brushing accidentally
against his shorts. Lonnie grabbed my brother's cock and playfully squeezed
it.

I couldn't believe what I was watching. I knew that Lonnie had felt my
crotch a few times earlier, but I had shrugged it off as just innocent
play. But watching them in the driveway, the close contact between them,
the playful bantering they were doing, one thing was becoming obvious- my
brother and Lonnie were more than just friends.

I wondered how I had missed that. All the times they had spent in our
bedroom and not once had I picked up that there may be something more going
on with them. Maybe they had shown an interest in each other and I just
didn't see it. Maybe now that I was questioning my own sexuality, I was
becoming more aware of it.

I looked back out the window and watched them sit down on the curb. They
moved closer so that their bodies were rubbing against each other. They'd
look at each other, say something and then start laughing. In the past I
thought they were just good friends, enjoying each other's company. Now as
I watched them I began to realize it was more than that. They appeared to
be boyfriends.

Now new fears emerged. What if Billy came to me and wanted to talk? What if
he wanted me to give him advice? I was his older brother and he trusted me
How could I talk to him and not give myself away? Could I honestly tell him
it was okay if he was gay, when I was fighting my own battles?

Then I thought of Mom and Dad. Had Billy told them yet? Our parents were
open minded and they always taught us not to judge other people. My mother
saw the world as beautiful flowers. "Each person is a flower. Some are red
roses, some are purple violets," she'd say. "Even some are pink
carnations."

I never knew what she meant by that until lately. Did the pink flowers to
her symbolize gay people?  Did she somehow know that one of her children
would grow up to be gay? Was that her way of telling us that she and Dad
were alright with it?

I was now more confused than ever. And my worries began to mount. What if
Billy and I were both gay? He had always looked up to me. Even though he
might be gay, would he be disappointed if I was also? I know that sounds
strange, but what if he wanted me to be straight. After all, he always
assumed I was. I had a girlfriend whom he loved, and Rachel was crazy about
him. She'd often insist that he go with us to a movie if it was something
he could see. He was like a little brother to her. The three of us had fun
together. What would he say if I no longer dated Rachel?

My thoughts were interrupted when the back door flew open and Billy and
Lonnie came running in. "Where's our tea?" Billy shouted. "You went to get
it fifteen minutes ago."

I looked at Billy as if I were seeing him for the first time. When I left
this morning, he was brushing his teeth in our bathroom. I looked at him
and noticed how young he appeared, even though he stood over six feet
tall. He was innocent- and straight.

But now stood before me a stranger. How long did he intend to hide his
secret from me? Perhaps he didn't have one. Perhaps his and Lonnie's
friendship was innocent. But as I looked at them standing with their bodies
pressed against each other, I knew.

"What?" Billy gave me a puzzled look as I stood holding two glasses of
tea. He looked down worriedly at Lonnie.

"Nothing," I said reassuringly as I walked over and handed him a
glass. Lonnie stared up at me with a worried look as I handed him the cold
glass. I could see fear in his eyes. I think he knew I knew. I think he
realized that he and Billy had been careless. Our playful bantering had
turned into more. His hand grabbing my crotch had carried the game too far,
and now he feared his and Billy's secret was exposed.

I wanted to reach out and hold him. I wanted to tell him everything was
alright. It was okay to be gay. But I couldn't. I need time to think. I had
to understand myself before I could begin to help them understand
themselves. I was the big brother. I was supposed to know these things.

Billy looked over at Lonnie and said, "Let's go." Lonnie gave me another
quick look and they went upstairs to our room. A few minutes later I heard
the shower. I crept upstairs to see if they were in the bathroom
together. I knew they wouldn't be, but I had to make sure.

Billy was lying in just his underwear on the bed reading a sports magazine
when I walked in. He looked up but continued reading as I sat down at the
computer desk. I turned it on and checked my email. I was responding to a
friend when Lonnie walked into the room. He was naked. He didn't see me at
the desk when he started giggling and tugged on his small cock. Billy shook
his head and looked over at me.

"Shit!" Lonnie squealed. He wrapped his towel around him and ran back
across the hall to the bathroom. I looked over at Billy and his face was a
bright red. I turned back to my computer, pretending that I hadn't seen
anything. Minutes later the bathroom door opened and Lonnie came back into
our bedroom. He was dressed in his street clothes. Billy got up and went
into the bathroom, leaving me and Lonnie alone.

I kept turning to see what he was doing. He was sitting on the edge of
Billy's bed with his head hung down. I could tell he was still extremely
embarrassed about what had happened earlier.

"It's okay," I finally said. He looked over at me.

"What?"

"I said it's okay." I turned and faced him. "Billy and I walk around naked
all the time. It doesn't bother me"

He started to say something else, but he hung his head and muttered,
"Okay." As if on cue, the bathroom door opened and Billy came walking naked
into the room. Lonnie quickly looked up, but returned his gaze to the
floor. Occasionally, he'd take a quick peek as Billy put on his underwear
and shorts. When he finished dressing, he nodded at Lonnie and they left
the room.

I sat at my desk unable to concentrate on reading email. All I could think
of was that Pandora's Box had been opened again. This time it involved
someone I loved. Not only did I have to deal with my own struggles, I had
to also protect my brother from the evils of the jar.


We had another interesting dinner. Billy invited Lonnie to join us. It
wasn't unusual because he had eaten with us many times; however, the
silence at the table was deafening. Usually, Billy and Lonnie would tell
jokes and have everyone laughing. This evening was different. Neither of
them hardly said a word.

My mother kept asking them if they were alright. They would nod their heads
and say a polite, "Yes, Ma'am." Even my father couldn't get Billy
interested in talking about baseball, and Billy never passed up a chance to
discuss his favorite sport.

After dinner they went back up to our bedroom while I sat in the family
room watching television with Mom, Dad and Josh.  Brenda had a friend over
and they were playing in her bedroom.

"How's track season look?" My father asked when a commercial came on. He
enjoyed sports, and he was happy that all his sons had participated in
something. He was trying to encourage Josh to take up martial arts. He had
taken him to a couple of karate and judo exhibitions, hoping he would get
him interested in the sport.

"Okay, I guess." I told him about the guy Coach Templeton was bringing in
to help us.

"I'll have to stop by and meet him," said Dad. "I want to make sure you get
the right training."

Dad is an insurance agent and can pretty much make his own hours. It isn't
unusual to see him sitting in the bleachers watching me practice after
school. He hasn't missed one of my meets since I started running. One thing
I admired about him, he never tries to interfere like some parents do. He
just enjoys watching us participate. He had played football and wrestled in
high school and college. Now in his fifties, I sometimes feel that he
wishes he was still young again.

When they turned the program over to the History Channel, I left the
room. I got enough learning at school. I didn't have to spend my nights
watching something educational.

When I went to my room, Billy and Lonnie were lying on Billy's bed doing
homework. They were pressed up against each other, but jumped apart when I
entered the room. I went over to my desk and started working on a report
for government while they worked on algebra homework.

We'd been working quietly for about twenty minutes when the door flew
open. I jumped when Kenny shouted out, "Northview Lions Roar!" He then
started jumping around the room roaring like a wild animal. I laughed until
Adrian came trailing behind him into the room.

Kenny jumped on Billy's bed and started tickling him. My brother squealed
and Lonnie jumped on Kenny's back trying to pull his arms away. I sat and
stared at Adrian. I couldn't understand what he was doing in my room. Why
had Kenny brought him by without asking me first?

Adrian looked uncomfortable. He'd look over at Kenny and my brother
wrestling on the bed, and then he'd look over at me. It appeared he wanted
to leave, and I would have been happy if he had.

Even though I was angry, his appearance still had the same effect on me it
did the first time I met him. My eyes scanned his body. I looked at his
crotch, seeing if I could see the bulge that he had when he was wearing his
skimpy running shorts earlier in the afternoon.

I looked into his handsome face and noticed his long eyelashes and the thin
mustache and goatee he wore. His brown skin was flawless. He was looking at
Kenny, but he turned suddenly and noticed me admiring him. He appeared to
blush as he cast his eyes to the floor.

After giving Billy a noogie, Kenny jumped up from the bed and walked over
to where I was sitting. He looked down at my monitor.

"Hey, Perv," he laughed. "Where's the porn?" I quickly looked over at
Adrian. He was trying to hold back a laugh.

Billy walked over to Adrian and extended his hand. "Hi, I'm Billy." Adrian
gave him a firm handshake.

"I'm Adrian," he replied. Kenny walked over and threw his arm around him.

"This, My Boy," he said to Billy, "is my new catcher."

"Wow!" Billy replied. "You must be good. Kenny doesn't let just anyone
catch for him."

"He is," remarked Kenny. "Too bad he's a senior or he could catch for you
next year." Kenny explained to Adrian how Billy was going to be his
replacement when he graduated. Within a few minutes, they were talking like
they had been friends for years.

As I sat and watched them I was becoming jealous. Billy seemed to really
like Adrian. Even Lonnie had joined in on the conversation. The only time
Adrian seemed uncomfortable was when he looked over at me. He'd smile
slightly and then look down at the floor.

"We'd better go," Kenny said after they'd been talking for about a half
hour. "Coach wants us on the field at nine."

"Nine!" Adrian said surprisingly. "On a Saturday?"

"How do you think we became the top team in the state?" He replied. "Only
pussies sleep late on Saturday morning." He looked over at me and
smiled. "Ain't that right, Zac?" Billy and Lonnie started laughing.

I looked over at my brother. "Like you don't get up before noon?" It was
Billy's turn to blush.

Kenny turned back to me. "Why don't you join us?"

"You're kidding, right?" I responded. "Why would I want to get up and watch
you guys toss balls around early on a Saturday morning."

Kenny grinned. "Because you love me."  He walked over and tried to pull me
into a hug.

I laughed and pushed him away. "Fag!" I shouted. I looked over and saw a
hurt look on my brother's face. He quickly looked at Lonnie and frowned. I
immediately regretted saying it. He felt like I did when Armstrong had
muttered it to me earlier.

Kenny didn't react. We'd been calling each other names for years. However,
I noticed that Adrian saw the look that Billy and I shared. It was as if he
sensed how Billy responded to my comment.

He walked over and shook Billy's hand again. "It was nice meeting you," he
said. He reached out and ruffled Lonnie's hair. "You too, Squirt," he
laughed.

"Hey!" Lonnie squealed. "I'm not a squirt. Just because I'm not built like
you guys." I became jealous when his eyes scanned Adrian's body.

"Let's go," Kenny grabbed Adrian's arm and pulled him toward the door.

Adrian stopped and looked over at me. "See you tomorrow, Zac?"

I frowned. "I doubt it." His smile disappeared. Another tug and he left the
room. I looked over at Billy as he gave me an angry look.

"That was rude," he said. "Adrian's a nice guy."

"If you say so," I quipped as I turned and continued working on my
assignment.

I worked for another twenty minutes. I kept glancing out of the corner of
my eye at Billy and Lonnie as they lay stretched out on the bed. They
pretended to be working on algebra, but they were more interested in a
playful game of leg wrestling.

I got up from my chair and walked over to the door. I nodded at Billy and
announced, "I'm going downstairs for about a half hour to watch television
with Mom and Dad. I'll knock before I come back in." Billy's face turned
red as he smiled and nodded back.

Instead of going into the family room, I went outside onto the deck. I sat
down in a chaise lounger and closed my eyes. The sun was setting and the
weather was comfortable. Before long I fell asleep. I don't know how long
I'd been dozing before I heard someone slide open the patio door. I opened
my eyes and watched as my mother sat down in a lounge chair beside me.

She sat back, sighed deeply and closed her eyes. I knew she was tired from
work. She was a cashier at a local grocery store and had to stand on her
feet for over eight hours. My father made enough to support us, but she
enjoyed her job. She knew almost everyone in town, and her customers often
turned to her for advice as they stood in her line. My mother was probably
about the closest thing to the National Enquirer when it involved what was
happening in our town. She was usually the first person to know when
someone was having a new baby or a couple was getting a divorce.

I looked over at her as she lay with her eyes closed. "Tired?"

"Long day," she muttered softly. "How about you?"

"I'm good," I replied. She sat up and looked at me.

"Are you?"

"Of course," I said as I looked over at her. "Why wouldn't I be?"

She studied me closely before lying back down. "I don't know," she
replied. "You've been very quiet the past couple of days, like something is
on your mind." She turned her head toward me. "Want to talk about it?"

"Naw," I replied. "Like I said, I'm good."

I really did want to talk, but just not to my mother- at least not yet. So
much was swirling around inside my head. Talking to someone would help me
figure out what was going on. My only problem, I didn't know who to talk
to.

I couldn't talk to my best friend. Kenny would never understand. I'd heard
him make so many homophobic remarks over the years. His first reaction
would be to think I was joking. Then when he realized I was being truthful,
he'd probably get upset. After that, it's hard to say what he would do.

I didn't want to talk to Mom or Dad. I wanted to be sure that what I was
feeling was real. For all I knew, it could just be something every guy or
girl goes through. Maybe everyone has a `gay stage' where they question
themselves. I'd never heard anyone talk about it, but then again, it's not
exactly something you'd discuss over lunch in the cafeteria.

"Hey, Gang. I think I may be gay."

"Forget it, it's just a phase. You'll be back to being straight in a week
or two."

"Whew. For a minute there, I was worried."

Too bad real life isn't like that. No, what I'm feeling isn't going to go
away in a week or two. My only problem is I can't figure out why I'm
feeling this way. It's like it crept up on me in the dark. I always thought
a gay guy always felt gay; like he started playing with another guy's dick
when he was ten or so. In health class, the teacher said studies indicated
people were born gay. Then why didn't I think of sucking Kenny's cock when
we were little? We used to jack off all the time together, even before we
could cum. Not once did I look down at his dick and want it in my mouth. We
touched and felt each other, just because we were curious what another
guy's dick felt like, but we never went further than that. Neither of us
ever suggested it.

So can one guy make you change the way you are? Right now I don't know what
I am. Maybe I was gay all along and it took Adrian to bring that to the
surface. Thinking back, having sex with Rachel didn't interest me. Even
when she jacked me off and I fingered her, I felt dirty afterwards. Most
guys would have gone back to school and boasted that they fingered their
girlfriend, but I felt ashamed.

I knew I had to find out. I didn't want to be gay, so I needed to know if I
was straight. Was I capable of performing with a girl? If I could, then I
wouldn't be gay, right?

One thing was certain, I didn't want to see if I was gay first. The only
guy who had aroused my interest was Adrian. Any thought of him would make
my cock harden. Billy had caught me masturbating thinking about him. The
past couple of days I'd even been looking at guys at school. I wanted to
know if any other guys had a similar effect on me.

I noticed myself looking down at guy's crotches as they passed by me in the
hall. Shawn Stevens, an openly gay student, saw me looking at him and
winked at me as I passed. As my face flushed with embarrassment, I could
hear him giggling when he walked away.

Then I did bone up in government class when I looked over and saw Drew
Persons stick his hand inside his pants and rearrange his cock. It was
obvious he had an erection. He kept pushing it down with his elbow. Drew is
an extremely handsome blonde. He's boasted to having sex with over ten
girls in our senior class. A couple of weeks ago two girls got suspended
for fighting over him. From the bulge protruding from his shorts, it was
obvious why they fought.

Until a few days ago I would never have noticed Drew's erection. But when I
saw it in class yesterday, I couldn't keep my eyes off it. I was hard as a
brick when the bell rang, and I had to carry my book bag in front of me so
people couldn't see my erect cock poking through the thin material of my
athletic shorts.

I had to find someone to talk to about all these feelings. I also had to
find out if I was gay. As I sat beside my mother who had now fallen asleep
in her chaise lounge, I began to come up with a plan. I knew it was wrong
as I thought about it, but I felt it was something I had to do. I needed to
know.

Kenny, Alise, Rachel and I had made plans to go to a movie tomorrow. Rachel
called me earlier and said her parents were going to a golf banquet in the
evening. She wanted me to pick her up before they left at seven. I knew
from previous banquets that they wouldn't be home until well after
midnight.

I was going to call her in the morning and see if she wanted to go to
dinner, just the two of us. I'd suggest that we could rent a movie and go
back to her house and watch it alone. I'm sure she'd go along with it, even
be excited by my suggestion.

According to Kenny, who heard it from Alise, Rachel was ready to have sex
with me. She'd been ready for months. She was just waiting for me to make
my move. Alise had been telling her how exciting sex was with her and Kenny
and she wanted to experience sex with me before we left for college. She
wanted me to be her first since we had been dating for a couple of years.

The only reason I hadn't had sex with her was because I really didn't feel
I loved her. I cared about her and I enjoyed being with her, but I didn't
know if it would be deceitful to take her virginity when I didn't love
her. It should be by someone who loved her more than I did.

But now things had changed. I needed to prove to myself that I could
perform sexually with a girl, and Rachel was a willing partner. We had
almost come to the brink of sex, but I had refused to take it further. She
had even asked me to fuck her one night when she had my pants open and was
stroking my cock. And I almost did. I think I would have if I had had a
condom. Tomorrow night I'd be prepared. Tomorrow night I would prove I
wasn't gay, and then all the confusing thoughts running through my mind
would end.

They would end, right?

When my mother started snoring lightly, I called out her name. She woke up
with a start. "Better go to bed," I said. She nodded her head, got up and
ambled into the house. I soon followed her.

My brother was in his bed, buried under his covers. Lonnie must have left
while I was out on the patio. I looked at the clock on my monitor. It was a
little after ten. After watching a few videos on Youtube, I decided to go
to bed as well. Tomorrow was a big day.

I undressed and crawled into bed. As I was getting comfortable, Billy sat
up and looked over at me.

"Zac?" He whispered.

"Yeah, Billy?"

"Thanks."

"For what?

"Nothing," he replied. "Just thanks for being my big brother."

"Sure thing." I smiled at him, but I wasn't sure if he could see me in the
dark. "Now go to sleep." He lay back down as I rolled over on my side and
tried to go to sleep.

Unfortunately, sleep didn't come easily. I was consumed with guilt for what
I had planned with Rachel.


* * * * * * * *

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