Date: Sat, 30 Oct 1999 08:25:51 -0400
From: wizkid24@yahoo.com
Subject: dreaming-of-jaye-2
The following story is a work of fiction, with a touch of reality
thrown in. For the most part this story is more of a "what-if"
and should be treated as such. The names have been changed to protect
those who may be recognizable. The time frame has also been changed to
suit my memory (or lack thereof).
If you are offended by stories of male-male sexual contact, then
please find something else to read. If it is unlawful in your area
to read or download such material, do us both a favor and don't look.
Comments, and suggestions can be directed to wizkid24@yahoo.com and
through yahoo pager to wizkid24. Email in HTML format will be ignored.
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I didn't see Jaye all summer. I had to spend it at my father's
place. Jaye must have been crushed, it wasn't until just before school
started that i wrote to him. I had to break the news that I was
transferring to Cortland that year. I wasn't going to be able to see
him except on weekends that I spent at my mom's. He never wrote back
to me, or if he did, my nosey stepsister got to letter before I
did. Aww, man! That's how she guessed.
One afternoon, after work, she and I started talking about her boy
troubles. That's when I slipped.
"Why don't you just go back with Bobby? He's cute." I said.
Not exactly the way I wanted to come out, but this was as good a time
as any. The look on her face was priceless.
"He's what?" Katie's eyes nearly fell out of her head when it
finally sunk in. "You think he's cute? I just knew you were
gay"
"No, wait! I'm not gay. Uh...uh, I'm bi"
"But you're too good looking to like guys, you're too
nice. You just like guys because you can't find the right
girl." The shock phase went right to denial.
Little did we realize that my step-mother had come home and was
evesdropping on the whole conversation. That night, while I was at my
mom's, Katie spilled her guts to her mother. I was on a roll that
weekend so I told my mom, too. I did let her know that I wasn't quite
accepting of the fact yet, and I didn't completely understand it.
"I don't know, Ma, I might find the right girl." I was trying
to convince myself as much as I was trying to convince her.
"Well, I kinda thought you were that way, the way you and EJ
hang out all the time. Ya know Fred..." Uh oh, she called me
by name. "That's probably why you've been sick lately. That
lifestyle isn't exactly heathy."
"Ma! I'm the only person he's slept with!"
"For your sake, I hope you're right"
That comment just burned me up inside, I stormed off to my room and
slammed the door behind me. I decided to bury my nose in a book, but
got bored with it soon afterwards. It got me mellowed out at least. I
headed for the living room.
"Hey, Ma. Can I go to Jaye's place?"
"I suppose so."
"I mean Jaye's not EJ's"
"Where's he live?"
"I don't know, here's the address he gave me, I can't
pronounce the street name." I handed her the little sheet that
Jaye gave to me on our trip back from DC.
"Oh, way out there. I can't today, we still have to go school
shopping at Pyramid Mall, for you and your brother"
It took us three hours to get through that blasted mall. Usually I
enjoy going shopping with her, but all I could think about was being
able to see Jaye again. I was worried that if I didn't see him that
very weekend, then I might not see him again.
I never made it out to see Jaye, that weekend. My time in Cortland
High was short-lived. I felt sick constantly, and my mom was sick of
having to take me from school, to the doctor's, to my dad's, and so
on. In my first three weeks of attending, I only made it to 10 days of
class. Back to Dryden I went, mom's orders but, I was happy that I
would be able to see Jaye again.
The first day back was fantastic, Jaye was in three of my classes,
plus PhysEd. I especially liked the idea of him being in my English
class. I sat behind him, so it was easy to chit chat with him.
The other good thing about English class was having Tara sit next to
me. It must have made that teacher nuts, the three of us were about
the chattiest kids in the class.
I got settled in to my class schedule fairly quick. Something was
still bothering me, Jaye was being rather distant with me. Sure we
were talking, but it was mostly about school work. I let this carry on
for a couple of months, until one afternoon during study hall, Tara
approached me.
"Fred, what's going on between you and Jaye?" She asked. There
was nowhere for me to run.
"I was hoping you could tell me. He seems a bit uncomfortable
around me. Has he said anything to you? I'm sure he told you
about the trip to DC." I was babbling on, not really guessing
that he kept quiet about what went on during the trip.
She had the look of wonder on her face. "No, he didn't say
anything about DC," her look turned to a concerned one, "what
happened? Did you two get in a fight?"
"Ha, far from it. If we did, then his attitude toward me would
be easy to explain"
"Well, tell me, what happened between you two. You guys were
buddy-buddy last year."
"You really want to know?" She nodded for me to go on. "Now
promise you won't say anything to him, I don't want him
freaking out"
"Yes, I promise. Now spill!" She was really exasperated at
this point.
With a deep breath I said, "I told him I was bisexual..."
another deep breath, "and I gave him a blow job in the
bathroom."
"You're what? Do you have any idea how big a crush he had on
you last year? This is so great. So do you like him, do you
have a boyfriend"
"Whoa, wait, backup. Did you hear the last part of what I
said? I gave him a blowjob, in the bathroom, during our DC
trip. Isn't it obvious that I like him?" Then I jokingly said,
"You wanna take some notes there, blondie."
She just glared at me for that comment. "That's why he gets
nervous when I mention your name. So, how much did he have to
pay?"
"Not a damn thing, I only made that story up to hide the fact
that I am gay. Hey, how did you know? I thought he didn't tell
you anything about the trip." Tara has always been good at
snagging me into spilling my guts to her, and now my face was
turning a bright shade of red, knowing that she snagged me
again.
"He didn't say anything about the blowjob, just that you said
you were a protitute. Is that why he shys away from you?"
"Tara, newsflash! I have no idea why he won't talk to me like
he used to. I was hoping you could tell me."
"No, I can't. I think he's afraid you might charge him money
the next time you guys did anything."
"Oh gawd. Why did I have to come up with that bullshit story?"
I asked myself. Turning to her, I asked, "So, do you know if
he likes me? I mean...more than as a friend."
I could see she was ready to burst with laughter. "You mean
you haven't gotten that figured out yet? Hello! Why do
you think I'm asking you all these questions about the way
he's acting, I thought you two had broken up or something."
"We haven't even gone out together. Besides, you know the
story I gave him."
"Fred," she looked me dead in the eye, "yes, I know about that
story of you being a whore, I just thought you could have
given it up to be with Jaye. Anyway, it's almost time to get
out of here. He has practice with the swim team today after
school, why do you try to stick around to watch or talk to him
afterwards?"
"I can't. Don't you think it would look a bit obvious? I mean,
I do live six miles from here and there's no bus that runs
that late."
"Well, just say that you were at your girlfriend's place. She
lives here in town, right?"
"Who, Arin? She doesn't know that I'm gay, and she won't cover
for me either. I could always call him, better yet, you call
him, I don't want to be asked how I got his phone number."
"We have one more class after this one, write him a note and
I'll give it to him. He loves the way you write."
"Okay, I'll do that. Just make it look like it's from you, i
don't want him to toss it without reading it."
"Deal, give it to me at my locker before you leave. I'll stay
late to catch Jaye after practice."
Finally, my chance to get back in Jaye's good graces. Tara met me at
her locker and I gave her the note. I told her to give Jaye my phone
number if he asked for it. I knew she had it from our contact list for
chorus class.
I headed for my bus, wondering if I had been set up or if she was
sincere. At that point I didn't care too much, all I wanted was to be
Jaye's boyfriend.
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Well folks, I know that there wasn't any sex in this one, I couldn't
figure out a place to put a scene without forcing it. So will Tara
give Jaye the note? Send your comments to wizkid24@yahoo.com. I try to
reply to all email I get.