Date: Thu, 04 Feb 1999 16:45:52 PST
From: - xiot <xiot@hotmail.com>
Subject: A Drop of Water (gay male/high school)
This is my first story. I'd like to hear from anyone willing to write
me. All comments, questions, criticisms or anything else gratefully
accepted and appreciated at xiot@hotmail.com
As I sit in the comforts of my favorite chair I simply lean back and
enjoy another episode in what was becoming one of my favorite pastimes.
I loved to just sit there and stare at him. I think it made it even
better that he had no clue as to what I was doing. He would catch me
staring a lot and I would not shy away at all. I would just stare
directly into his eyes and play it off as though I was just weird or
whatever. He seemed to have that firmly established already anyways. I
think I could do things to him that no one else could without seriously
arousing his suspicions because I had the cover of labels like freak and
weirdo to hide behind. He labelled me but didn't renounce me, so in he
end it worked to my advantage. He just accepted me as I was. Not
necessarily a good thing as this meant he almost never took me
seriously, but I suppose I can't ask for everything.
So here I am yet again staring away. I suppose it gave me slight
feelings of guilt every now and then but nothing serious. I certainly
had no problem enjoying touching him when the opportunities arose, under
numerous guises, most notably the oft-used wrestling mockery. I think I
had more than crossed the line, as I suppose he has as well. Playful
touching has occurred on numerous occasions. Admittedly though I have
been the aggressor. Actually, he would usually initiate the first
contact and then I would proceed to move on to other things. His
laughter and smiling keeps me going. I know it's kinda risky grabbing
at him through the front of his jeans and poking him through the back
but based on his reactions I'm guessing he doesn't mind so much.
So I'm still sitting here staring. I never have what it takes to go for
anything further. It's the drawback of being as shy as I am as well as
my tendency to play mind games with people. I strive to never let
anyone know what I'm thinking or how I'm feeling. I'm just way too
scared as to how he'd react. I couldn't have him spreading all kinds of
news about me. I despise attention. I also don't want to frighten him
off. As torturous as it is I still absolutely love just staring at him
as I am right now. It's probably in my best interests to keep
everything as it is. Me being totally secretive about how I feel and
just living through staring, which maybe I can use in dreams later on.
I've been staring for a while now. I think he sees me out of the
corner of his eyes. I wonder if he's known all along. He finally looks
up and our eyes meet. One key I always try to keep in place is that I
don't give anything away with my facial expressions. I try to look
either totally blank or perhaps exhibit the slightest smirk. Not any
sort of happy smile but just a little knowing or mischievous grin. This
is no exception. He responds in his usual way also.
"What?" he asks coldly.
I just hold my smirk.
"What the fuck are you staring at?"
I just hold my smirk. He can't help but to smile a little bit now. I
follow suit and allow my lips to curve upwards just a little bit as
well.
"Oh I get it, I get it, you want a piece of this? Is that what you
want?" he says in a tone that means he wants to wrestle.
I just hold my smirk.
"Oh you don't? Good 'cause I didn't wanna have to kick your ass
anyways," he says with a big grin.
"Ooooohhhhh," I finally say in a tone of mock pain.
"Suck my dick."
He says it in an aggressive way as an attempt to insult me. He has said
this many times before. I always reply "pull it out" in hopes that
maybe one day he will. But this time I don't reply at all. Almost
without hesitation I react.
I make a move right away to the couch where he's sitting. Once there I
kneel down in front of him and place my hands on his knees. He is
wearing jeans so there is no direct skin contact but just being in
contact with him at all sends a shockwave through me. I stare directly
at his crotch, which gives nothing away as he is wearing baggy jeans. I
scroll up to see his face. He has a completely serious look. I was
half-expecting to hear him say "get the fuck off me" as he usually does
whenever I make physical contact with him, although it is also usually
quite half-hearted. But this time he says nothing. This time it's him
who is not giving anything away by his facial expression. The blank
look on his face tells me that I'm in control right now. No, not really
in control, but it is my move. So I slowly start to move my hands up
his legs. I see no response from him. I return my focus to his crotch
and legs. Watching and feeling as my hands begin to move up his thighs
gives me an incredible sense of excitement. I reach mid-thigh and am
wildly thinking of what I will do when I run out of space. As I reach
his upper thighs I hear him gasp.
"Uhhhmmm..." he is whispering now, in the cutest little voice that makes
him sound as though he is about 10 years old. The tone is unsure and
questioning. I don't want to but I know I must stop until I know he's
ok with it.
I look up at him. His eyes are staring down at my hands and their
positioning on his body. I think he was enjoying it until he looked
down and saw what was happening. The pleasures we receive from what we
see and what we feel often conflict. They certainly do for him here.
He lifts his eyes from my hands and meets my gaze now. He looks scared
to me.
"What?" I ask, trying to sound as concerned as possible because I
truly am.
"What are you doing?" he asks very rhetorically. He just
needed a stall tactic.
"Jet-skiing," I reply with a smirk. This has always been one of his
favorite smart-ass replies to any question of what he's doing.
"No, I mean, uhhmm..."
"I'm sorry, do you want me to stop?" It hurts for me to ask this
question. To be in this position and now offer him an easy way out
seems very counter-productive.
"Are you, what's, uh, this is..." He stammers through the words in a
feeble attempt at opposition that lacks his heart's support. I now know
that he's scared to death. Scared of what will happen if he lets his
guard down. But at the same time I think there is a side of him that
wants this really bad as well. He's just afraid of what he is feeling
and the way it conflicts with how he has been taught to feel.
"No," he finally spits out, whispering again. He manages a slight,
nervous smile this time. I think I know which side of him has won out.
"Hey, seriously, just tell me what your feeling. We'll do whatever you
want and nothing more ok? I don't want you to be uncomfortable."
I knew it came out a little too cliche sounding, but I had to say it.
There's no way I could just go on like this. I kind of felt like I was
taking advantage of him. But at the same time he seemed like he really
needed someone to help him along. I just needed his ok.
"Ok," he whispered.
I was so relieved. I was scared that he would rethink it and pull away.
But now it seemed as though he was gonna let me do what I wanted.
"If I do anything you don't like or don't wanna do just say so ok?"
"Ok," he whispered again, this time with a tinge of impatience in his
voice. "Just don't go too crazy or too fast ok?
I knew for sure that he wanted this now and I grinned at him. He
grinned back shyly. He was a bit embarrassed but that just made him
even cuter.
With that I turned my attention back to my hands and his thighs. I
squeezed gently at the soft flesh underneath. He placed his hands on
the back of my head and he leaned forward a little bit. I could feel
him just above me, hovering, and I could feel his warm breath as it blew
into my hair. I was overcome with emotion. Without any warning or care
what would happen I took one quick move and lifted my head up and stole
a kiss from his lips. This may seem like nothing but in reality it
means a lot. It's a crossover from the world of sex to the world of
love. If you just screw around with sex then you can still hide behind
the idea of being horny friends who are merely experimenting and having
fun. But with a kiss comes the notion of something more.
And there was more, a lot more. I loved him so terribly much. I can't
count how many times I'd think of him or fantasize about him. I've
loved just staring at him for quite some time now. It went further than
physical love though. I found myself just missing his presence all the
time. As a friend, his personality, his manner of speaking, his
playfulness, even his inevitable insults I adored. I've never felt like
this for anybody or anything in the world. And now here I am kissing
him.
Admittedly it was a very weak kiss, more a peck than anything else. I
just made quick contact between our lips. I just had to do it. The
ever so brief contact was still nice because I knew it was his lips I
was touching. I wish I didn't have to force it like this but I was a
bit panicky, scared of how he would react.
His reaction was pretty much non-existent. He did virtually nothing
except stare at me. He didn't say a word, he didn't push me away, he
didn't pull me closer. I saw fear in his eyes again.
I was afraid too. I didn't care though. I moved in once again. He did
not react so I continued, much slower this time. I closed my eyes. I
paused for a moment in close to his face. I wanted to feel his breath
on my face. But I didn't. He was holding it, just as he has withheld
everything else I've ever wanted from him. I made my final move and our
lips met for a second time. It was still a weak kiss. Our lips were
closed and things still felt awkward. It was him who broke the ice a
bit. I felt his lips move a bit. Then a gap formed between them. The
awkwardness instantly left me and for the first time I felt it. Up to
this point my body had gone numb. Now all the feeling rushed back into
me at once. The warmth and softness of his lips, the warmth of his
thighs which my hands still held tightly and the surprising warmth of
his hands which now gripped my sides. I opened my lips as well. I've
never kissed anyone before so this was all new to me and it was
beautiful. I wanted so badly to shove my tongue in his mouth but once
again I was a bit afraid. I said "fuck it" to myself and went for it.
I decided to do it fast in one quick thrust. As I pushed my tongue
forward forcefully I was completely taken by surprise as I bumped into
his tongue halfway. He must have been thinking the same thing. I
couldn't help but giggle. I opened my eyes to find him staring back at
me. He wasn't laughing though. He looked scared again, but still oh so
cute. I started laughing a bit harder. As I looked at him I noticed he
started to look hurt. I realized how awkward he must still feel. He
probably still wasn't sure what was happening. I didn't want him to
think I was just messing with him.
"I'm sorry," I said softly. "It was funny though," I said with a
smile.
He smiled back this time. I took my right hand off his thigh and
caressed his face. It was so soft and silky. I moved in yet again to
kiss him. This time we both carried on right where we had left off.
Our tongues met almost immediately. The sensation of our lips first
touching was incredible as the warmth and softness had blown me away.
Our tongues first touching was both a similar and different experience.
Almost as soft, even more warm, even more sensitive and covered with
saliva. The taste was nothing like I could have expected and is
something I still cannot describe properly. It was enough to make me
almost fall over. We continued in our first true kiss for a few moments
more and I was completely lost in his mouth. My right hand was still
holding his face. I felt his hand on top of mine. He grabbed it and
slowly guided it back to his thigh. He didn't have to coax me any
further. I slowly began to break our kiss off. I didn't want to
release our liplock but I realized there were other things at hand. As
our faces separated we stared at each other again, with our awkwardness
fading. This time we gazed with love and lust. And smiles.
My head was swimming. I didn't know where to begin. But then again I
wondered how he would respond to all the things I wanted to do. He
might be expecting me to just open his pants and go to work. But I
wanted to be slower and more sensual with him. I didn't want to waste a
single moment of our time together. But based on the kiss we'd just had
and the way he reacted to it I figured he wouldn't be totally against
it. I think I've always known that deep down he has a soft loving side
to himself beneath the rough exterior he shows off. This was an
opportunity for both of us to finally get in touch with it.
He had placed my hand back on his thigh but I wanted to start
elsewhere. So I slid my hands up his thighs near his hips and continued
up to his stomach. His body was tense and I could feel it in his tight
abdomen muscles. I slowly moved my hands up his sides still enjoying
just the heat and knowing it was him underneath the fabric of his shirt.
I moved in towards his breasts and gently rubbed his nipples through his
shirt once I found them. I quickly receded back down to his waist area.
I slipped my fingers in underneath his shirt and felt the real flesh of
his body for the first time. It did not disappoint. I paused for just
a moment as soon as I felt skin. It was warm and soft just like his
lips were, but pleasing in a very different manner. I had just barely
begun to move my hands up when my left index finger sank in a bit. My
body smiled as my mind registered it as his belly button. I took some
time to poke and prod around it softly. After a short time of this I
continued my ascent. I took just the tips of my fingers and very
gently, barely touching him at all, slid them slowly up his sides. I
felt him shiver. I think the shivering excited me more than anything
else had up to this point. I applied more and more pressure until my
whole hands were pressing firmly on his chest. His skinny frame allowed
me to feel the bones of his ribcage underneath. I traced the outlines
of most of those bones before finally moving on. I moved further up
until my fingers found his nipples once again. I gently rubbed them
just as I had moments ago but this time without any fabric to separate
us. I heard him exhale deeply. I looked up and saw his head held back
and his eyes closed. I knew he was mine. And that I was his even more.
I grasped the bottom of his shirt and slid it slowly up towards his
head. He raised his arms so I could slide it off his body completely.
As I dropped it on the floor next to me I backed off for a moment to
take in the splendor of his bare torso. There was nothing in this world
that I wanted more. If I could have I would've put myself inside his
body and just snuggled up there for the rest of the night. But alas I
had to settle for this instead.
My hands grasped his sides once again and I gently laid my head down on
his chest. It made contact with my right cheek touching him right in
the center of his body. I turned my head to give my mouth access to the
flesh I've craved for so long now. I placed my first delicate kiss on
his body just beneath his left breast. My body tingled as my lips
touched his skin. I removed my mouth from his body and stuck out my
tongue. With just the tip of my tongue I traced a line across from his
left side to his right. I then moved diagonally downwards to find his
belly button once again. I let just my tongue explore inside for a
while before moving my lips back down to his body as well. My tongue
continued it's work inside as my lips sucked at the surrounding area.
After what seemed like forever I released him from my lips and moved
diagonally upwards to the left this time, returning to the spot where my
mouth had first made contact with him. I took time to worship this
sacred spot as I hoped I would be able to many times again in the
future.
After paying what I deemed sufficient homage I allowed myself to move up
to his left breast. I traced circles around the nipple with my tongue.
After completing the second revolution I let my tongue glide onto his
nipple and just sit there for a moment. I think the heat of my tongue
on his nipple affected him as much as it did me as he let out a slight
moan. I was startled as I had almost forgotten he even existed here as
a conscious being rather than just beautiful flesh. This revelation
only made things better as I realized I wasn't the only one I was
pleasing here. I didn't want to bore him though so after a few licks
and sucks of his left nipple I repeated the procedure on his right and
decided it was time to move on. I let myself pause for a few moments
though. I laid my head on the right side of his chest with my ear on
his breast. I could feel the vibrations of his heartbeat enter my ear
and echo all throughout my body. I could smell very faintly the most
beautiful scent I had ever inhaled. I positioned my nose closer to his
armpit to take it in even more. He didn't smell overbearingly of sweat
nor of anti-perspirant. He just smelled perfect.
I took a few more deep breaths and allowed myself to move on. I
chuckled to myself as my patience wore thin when confronted with the
thick fabric that I had forgotten about and now was blocking me from
what I desired. My fingers lingered around his waist for just a second
before finally undoing the button of his jeans. Next they slowly pulled
down the zipper that constricted him so much at this time. I was
rewarded with the gorgeous sight of him bulging in his cute blue and
green flannel boxers. My passions rose at this view and I could barely
contain myself any longer. I grabbed his jeans and slowly tugged on
them, revealing inch by inch more and more of his lower body. My eyes
moved away from his boxers to his smooth thighs as they were revealed,
then followed along slowly to his knees and calves. With his jeans now
bunched up at his ankles I took the opportunity to move my hands back up
to his thighs and ever so slowly let them crawl down the smooth flesh.
My hands followed the same route my eyes just had as they felt first his
thighs then knees and ended up on his calves. My mouth had been empty
for almost two minutes now and I couldn't help but to give it more of
what it hungered for. I placed my lips on his left thigh and let them
follow the very same trail my eyes and hands just had. Upon reaching
his calf I loitered there for a time before remembering what lay ahead
of me. I lifted his left foot and slid his jeans off that side and
followed with the right. I smiled at his socked feet. I let my hands
reach down and massage each of them in turn through his socks. I let it
go at that though. Bare feet are the one thing I don't have a taste
for. But his were oh so cute through his black socks.
After a last squeeze of each foot my mouth reversed it's previous
route back up his right leg, still taking time out to explore each of
the beautiful sights along the way. Upon reaching his boxers I let my
tongue slip just underneath the edge of the fabric and onto skin that
lay hidden from my eyes. I let it stay there for a while as I thought
about other things that I couldn't see right now. After a moment to
gather my thoughts I lifted my head up and gazed at the beautiful sight
before me. I took this moment to look up into his eyes again. The look
he gave me back shattered any doubts I had of whether or not he would
want me to go any further. With that clearly understood I scanned down
his body again. Across the chest I had worshipped earlier, at the belly
button I had probed, to the boxers I adored, down the path of his legs
that I had thrice followed and lastly at those cute feet I drew the line
at. The smile on my face must have been a mile wide. It quickly
rescinded though as I returned to reality and focused again on the task
at hand. I moved my face right up alongside his boxers and scanned the
beauty outlined by them. I inhaled deeply taking in the slightly
different aroma his body emitted in this area. It smelled very good but
at the same time caused me pain like the smell of nearby food on the
street does when I'm broke and starving. Only this time the food was
right there for my taking. I moved extremely slowly as my left hand
crept towards the center of his boxers. As gently as I possibly could I
let it come to rest on the bulge that I knew he had been painfully
enduring for quite some time now. It twitched as soon as contact was
made and I felt a domino effect as my entire body twitched along with
it. Even through the fabric it was warmer than any other part of his
body had been except his mouth. I heard a slight whimper escape his
lips. I decided that I had tortured him more than was fair and agreed
to finally release him. I moved my hands back to his waist and moved my
fingers just underneath the elastic band of his boxers. Pausing again
for a moment, I rubbed for the last time flesh that would be hidden and
forbidden from my eyes as well as the rest of me.
The bulge beneath his boxers showed me his erect penis pointing
straight up so I knew there was to be no drama once I began to tug at
his underwear. I let the fabric be pushed down by my fingers and
watched closely as the head of his cock appeared naked before my eyes.
I was excited to say the least. I decided not to delay any further and
I continued the steady tug on his boxers and revealed more and more of
his dick to my yearning eyes. Upon reaching the base my eyes were now
full with five and a half inches of pure and raw beauty. Lastly my eyes
were acquainted with the two smooth and almost equally beautiful
testicles that hung just below. I let the boxers slide down his legs
and pulled them all the way off, finally fully removing the last of the
fabric obstacles that impeded all that I wanted, the entirety of him.
My eyes returned to his hard dick and my hands trembled at the thought
of touching it's bareness. I remained just as gentle as I had been the
whole time as my left hand reached up and for the first time touched the
flesh of his cock. It twitched again on contact and also grew slightly
in size, particularly the head. I moved my right hand in as well now to
caress his dick with the attention it deserved. I let my left hand now
reach down and cup the dangling balls that hung so tantalizingly below.
I squeezed them gently before rolling each of them individually through
my fingers.
I was very surprised at how I was feeling. I was feeling incredibly
good but not at all how I expected. I was not overcome with lust at
this time but with love. Yes I desired him in a very physical way but
it was accompanied with the depth and power of real love that I didn't
know would be here along with it. I thought I would be consumed with
lust at a time like this but it was real love that filled me instead.
This passed through my mind very briefly though as I decided to just let
it go and ride whatever feelings may come to me. What my eyes and hands
now had my mouth longed for terribly. Without hesitation now I leaned
right in with my tongue stuck out and licked a line straight up from the
bottom of his scrotum all the way up to the tip of his cock. Upon
reaching the top I noticed a small bit of precum at his slit. I put my
tongue back in my mouth and closed my lips. I slowly and gently began
running the tip of his dick around my mouth, basically tracing an
outline of my lips with his precum. Eventually I centered his cock with
my still closed lips and began to rub it back and forth along them.
Then I finally allowed my lips to part and my mouth to surround
completely the tip of his cock. I relished the taste of it in my mouth.
I didn't ever want to forget this moment. I slowly moved my head down
on his dick and in time I surprisingly found myself easily at the base.
This was my first time ever with a penis in my mouth and I suppose I was
just lucky he had a dick that wasn't too long. Once at his base I just
stayed there for a while, enjoying the feeling of fullness my mouth now
experienced that it had never felt before.
I slowly pulled my mouth up off his cock and watched as his beautiful
dick seemed to magically reappear before my eyes. I watched and was
amazed at how different it looked now. It was swollen larger than it
was moments ago and it glistened with the wetness of my saliva all over
it. I was fascinated by the shiny look it now had and the knowledge
that it was my own saliva that made it look that way. My left hand
grasped his shaft firmly at the base and worked it's way upwards. It
felt fantastic as it glided so smoothly along the liquid coated skin. I
saw a large pool of precum form at the tip of his dick. I leaned back
in slowly to gently lick at the tip of his dick. I slowly ran my tongue
across the pool of precum. The taste was incredible, unlike that of
anywhere else on his body. It was wonderfully sweet and it's taste
brought me to a special place I'd never been before. As I pulled my
head back a long sticky string of his precum still connected his cock to
my mouth. I was incredibly turned on at this point and I felt most of
my patience leaving me.
My head came back down out of the clouds at this time and my ears
registered the sounds of his deep moans now. I dove down to take each
of his balls into my mouth individually at first and then both at once.
The smell of him here made me dizzy. It was so deep and rich in his
sweaty odor of sex and it made my mind groan and growl with a hunger it
had never felt before. The taste was once again unlike any other but
equally fantastic. After fully drenching them with my spit I let my
right hand take over on them and moved my mouth back to his waiting
cock. I went about halfway down on him and let my tongue play with the
sensitive skin just below the head. He moaned and quivered in approval.
I sensed he was getting really worked up now and so continued sucking
him down deeply again. I took him fully into my mouth with quickness
and didn't hesitate for even a moment to pull off and then quickly
repeat the process again. I knew he wasn't going to last much longer
and I wanted as much of him as I could get. He began to moan louder now
and he also began thrusting his hips forward forcing his dick as far
into my mouth as was possible. The quick and gentle feelings of his
pubic hair against my nose tickled me and for a moment I even feared I
would have to sneeze. After a few more times up and down his shaft his
moans turned into loud groans and I knew his moment was at hand.
My right hand squeezed his balls firmly while my left hand wandered up
to rub his nipples. He quickly grabbed that hand however and stuck my
index and middle fingers in his mouth and began sucking on them. Only a
few seconds later I felt his hips thrust forward and stay that way as
his muscles all went tight. His mouth sucked hard on my fingers and my
mouth sucked harder and faster than ever on his cock. I felt the first
shot of his cum hit the roof of my mouth and then the rest became a blur
of wetness in my mouth as I continued to suck him as deep as I could. I
seriously wondered who was enjoying themself more at this moment. Soon
his hips relaxed back down onto the couch. His mouth let up a bit on my
fingers although he kept them in his mouth still. My right hand
released some of it's pressure on his balls and my mouth slowed down to
a nice easy pace on his now spent cock. I took some time to savor the
taste of his cum in my mouth. I didn't like it nearly as much as the
rest of the tastes he had provided me with but I swallowed it anyways.
I took the time to milk his dick for all the cum left inside before
finally releasing it from the confines of my mouth, instantly noting how
empty I felt. I laid my head on his right thigh as I watched his cock
already begin to shrink a little bit. My right hand relinquished his
balls and found a home on his left thigh. He released my fingers from
his mouth and I felt the chill of cold air on my fingers which had been
so warmly covered in his saliva.
I was afraid to look up at him, afraid of what I might see. Now that it
was over the feelings might all change. I just waited and enjoyed what
I had for the moment. In time I felt his hands on my head. His left
hand reached underneath my chin and lifted my head up so our eyes would
meet. I saw something in his eyes I really didn't expect. They were
blank. His hand moved from my chin down underneath my left armpit. I
felt him tugging up on me. I let my body be guided by him. He pulled
me up and towards him. I collapsed onto the couch with him, my head
resting on his chest again, my lips at that same sacred place just below
his left breast, our hips touching, our legs intertwined. I felt his
hand pulling on my chin again and this time when our eyes met he leaned
down to kiss me. It was just as nice as our first one had been. We
held it for some time and when he released me I looked into his eyes
again and saw a single tear searing down the left side of his face. I
reached up with my left index finger and wiped it off. I brought that
finger slowly to my mouth and tasted yet another aspect of him. This
one was by far the best.