Date: Sun, 26 Jun 2011 17:40:32 -0500
From: Jason Gordon <jaygordon_1981@hotmail.com>
Subject: Feels Like Falling 6

Disclaimer: The following is a work of fiction which will include t/t and
m/m relationships, and probably some sex too.  If it is illegal in your
area to read this, or if you are not old enough to read this (you know who
you are), stop here.  Otherwise, please enjoy.


Chapter Six


*******

REGISTERED users can access advance chapters (up to Ch. 22) of this and
other stories at my site, jaygordonstories.com.  Registration is free, and
your email will only be used to notify you of new chapter releases.

*******



As the sun began to set, Jim set up the grill and lit the charcoal, and
most of the guys gathered around and talked while the coals burned.  When
they were ready, Jim went into the cabin for the hotdogs and hamburgers,
which he and Paul had prepared into patties earlier in the day.  As he
opened the refrigerator, he heard someone else enter the cabin and looked
up.

Jim smiled and said, "How's it going out there, Paulie?"

"Fun," Paul smiled.  "Mostly just talking to Christina and some of the
girls."

"You're welcome to join the guys if you want, Paulie," Jim said.  "No one's
going to make problems for you!"

"I know," Paul said.  "Christina and I needed to catch up, though!"

"Yeah, I guess so!  I've sort of been taking all your time," Jim smiled and
held out a tray for Paul.  Then he grabbed one for himself and they walked
out to the grill.  Jim started cooking, while Paul stuck pretty close to
his elbow, except to run inside for the buns and condiments.  Meanwhile,
Danny got the bonfire started.

Everybody was eating around the glowing fire and talking when another truck
pulled up.  Jim and Paul were sitting side-by-side on the other side of the
fire so they didn't see it.  All they saw was Danny tensing up and
Christina scowl

"Hey, guys," Paul heard and involuntarily leaned into Jim.

"Don't worry, Paulie," Jim whispered.  "It's fine!"  Then he stood and
said, "Robert, Billy, what brings you guys out this way?"

"I got a text about the party, so we thought we'd drive out," Robert said,
a nervousness building among those kids who went to school together.
Seamus, Dean, Conrad and the others were in the dark.  That wouldn't last
long.

"Of course you're welcome," Jim said, "but I'm gonna have to ask you to be
nice to everyone who's here!"

Robert's face squinted up as he looked around and asked, "What?"  It was
then that Paul stood up and drew nearer to Jim.  "Paul," Robert sneered.
Then he looked back at Jim and said, "Shouldn't be a problem."

Danny's knuckled were white as he balled up his fists, ready to jump if
necessary, but Robert and Billy sat down and leaned against a big rock.
Billy could still see Paul's face around the fire and looked at him with
something like an apology in his face.  Paul responded with a stony look --
Billy knew Paul was here and had come with Robert!

Seamus leaned over and asked Danny, "What the fuck is this all about?"

"Robert and Billy have been bullying Paul.  They broke his glasses, bruised
him up pretty good.  And it was them who outed him earlier this year,"
Danny explained, his jaw flexing angily.

Seamus stood up and walked into the darkness for a piss, but when he
returned, he settled down on Paul's other side.  "Got your back, man," he
whispered.

Paul smiled and said, "Thanks!"

"So what's going on?" Robert said, trying to rouse the silent group.
"Where's the beer?"

"Sorry, just a friendly get together, not so much a kegger," Jim said with
a brittle smile.  "Don't want anyone to get hurt driving home!"

Robert reached into his pocket and pulled out a flask.  "That's okay, I
brought my own!"

Slowly the conversation returned to life, though everyone seemed to be
keeping at least one eye on the two interlopers.  Robert passed the flask
to Billy, who took a tentative drink, casting a furtive glance at Paul who
stared back at him.

"So, Paul, Danny says you got outed at school this year," Seamus said
casually, causing Paul to choke on his soda.

"Uhm, yeah," Paul said, looking up at the hulking boy by his side.  "It
sucks!"

"But surely it's nice too?  To be free, I mean, to do what you want, with
who you want?" Seamus asked.

"Not so much," Paul said.  "Pretty much just makes me a sideshow!"

"But at least now you can date!" Seamus declared.

"Right!  I've gone out with every gay guy at school!" Paul laughed.

"Wow, you've been busy," Seamus said, not catching the sarcasm.

Now Paul really laughed, drawing a smirk from Robert and a jealous glance
from Billy.  "That would be zero, Seamus!  I'm the only 'out' guy at my
school!"

"Would you like to go out with me some time?" Seamus asked staring into the
fire nervously.

"What?" Paul asked, choking.  Jim's face fell and full of dark shadows cast
by the fire as he listened helplessly.  He wanted to say something, wanted
to yell, 'NO!'  But instead he balled that up and swallowed it.

"I want to take you on a date," Seamus said, looking over at Paul with a
shy smile.  "Dinner and a movie, or dancing?"

"Dancing?" Paul asked.  "Really?"  He looked into the boy's handsome face
and saw only anticipation.  "I...."  Paul couldn't help himself.  He didn't
look to Billy, he looked over his shoulder at Jim who seemed to have been
drawn into a conversation with someone else, but was really just looking
away and blinking away tears.  "I'd love to!"

Seamus put an arm around Paul's shoulder and squeezed.  "AWESOME!"  He took
out his iPhone and typed in Paul's name and handed it to the boy.  "Give me
your number and I'll call you to figure out a time!"

Paul took it with a smile and entered his phone number and email address,
and then followed suit, giving the big boy his own phone.  Seamus handed it
back to him when he finished and put a heavy arm across Paul's slight
shoulder.  As they laughed and talked, both Jim and Billy grew darker.

But the whole thing exploded as Seamus was whispering to Paul and laughing,
when Robert said, "COME THE FUCK ON!  How can you guys put up with this
disgusting shit?"  The boy was clearly two sheets to the wind, which
brought out his inner sadist to grand effect.  An eerie calm silence
settled over the crowd.  "I mean, this little fairy just won't go away, and
now you've got this big assed queer!"

Seamus looked at him with a scowl and said, "Is that the best you can do,
douchebag?  Real original!"  And then he laughed dismissively.  "Run
along!"

Danny nodded at Seamus and stealthily got up from his place and moved
around behind Billy and Robert.  Robert looked around the fire and saw only
disgust, so he said to Billy, slurring lightly, "Let's get out of here
before the orgy starts!"

Billy nodded and started to follow him silently.  Before anyone realized,
Paul was on his feet and after the two boys.  He grabbed Billy by the arm
and said, "It's not safe!  He's drunk!"

Robert looked at Billy, shock on his face, and then at the small hand on
Billy's bicep.  Before he could stop himself, the slightly tipsy Billy
snarled, "Get your hand of me, fag!"  But when he shook Paul's hand off, he
moved too wildly and accidentally knocked Paul over.  The small boy tripped
on a root and scraped his head on a rock.

Paul felt a sharp pain in the back of his head and raised his hand to his
hair.  When he drew it back there was blood.  Jim was kneeling by him in an
instant, pressing his hand against the boy's head wound.  "Are you okay?"
he asked gently, casting a furious glance over his shoulder at Billy, who
looked on in horror.

"It's just my scalp -- it looks worse than it is," Paul said woozily.

"Come on!" Robert said to Billy impatiently.

"Don't let him go, Jim," Paul whispered.

"What?" Jim asked.

"Billy!  Don't let him ride with Robert.  He's drunk.  It's not safe!" Paul
demanded.

"After everything," Jim began, shaking his head.  "Billy!" he yelled,
standing up, his hands bloody.  "Come here, you dirty bastard!"  Robert and
Billy stopped and turned to face Jim.  "You come to my place and hurt my
friend, and you think you're just walking out of here?"

"It was an accident," Billy said, almost touching the desperation he felt
– desperate to run to Paul's side and beg for forgiveness, desperate to
run and hide and disappear in his shame, desperate to keep his secret.

"Come here!" Jim said with a low snarl.

"Jim," Paul called weakly, lying still on the ground.  "What are you
doing?"

Jim looked over his shoulder and gave Paul a look that said, 'HUSH! I know
what I'm doing!'

"Jim, I don't want any more trouble!  It was an accident," Billy said,
walking forward warily.

When he was close enough, Jim said, "Don't leave with him!"

Billy's look said, 'I know, but how?'  Jim's grin was knowing and
malicious, and Billy didn't have a moment to react when the big boy's fist
impacted his jaw with a crunch, laying him out, not unconscious but in
enough pain that he was not going anywhere anytime soon.  Then Jim looked
at Robert and said, "Get the fuck out of here!"

Robert cast a glance at Billy and was about to ask, 'What about him?', but
Danny appeared a few yards to his left and said, "You have a hearing
problem?"

Robert looked back and forth between them warily, before turning and
getting in his truck and driving off, his tired kicking up dirt and rocks
as he gunned it.  "What was that all about?" Danny asked Jim as he came
over and checked on Billy.

"Had to keep him out of that truck," Jim said.

"Why?" Danny asked.

"Paul asked," Jim said, as one might say, 'Why not?'

Danny shook his head and crouched by Billy.  "Dean, can you drop this
asshole off on your way home?"

"Sure, dude!" the big boy replied.  "He's riding in the back though.  I
don't want Seamus to murder him."

Jim helped Paul up and whispered, "Can you walk?"

"I'm fine!" Paul protested, but his knees were wobbly.  "We'll, a little
help wouldn't hurt, maybe."

Jim put his arm under Paul's and helped him up the cabin.  Inside, he
washed the wound and put a bandage on it.  "I should take you to a hospital
to make sure you don't have a concussion!"

"Jim, I just scratched my head on the way down.  I'll be fine once we get
it bandaged," Paul protested.

"At least I should send Christina and Danny home so you can sleep inside,"
Jim fretted.

"You getting nerves about sharing your little tent with a gay boy," Paul
teased, making Jim blush.  But Paul guessed the wrong reason.

"NO!  I'm worried about you Paulie!  I could have beat the shit out of
Billy!" Jim fumed.

"Speaking of which, you COULD have found a less violent way of convincing
him," Paul smiled.

"Yeah, but not as personally fulfilling," Jim said.  "You want to head back
down or lay down?"

"I'm okay for a while yet, as long as you'll fetch me my diet cokes," Paul
smiled, and they rejoined the gathered crowd.  Paul looked around for Billy
and saw him sitting in the back of Dean's truck, alone and head down.  Paul
started his way and waved for Jim to sit down.  Then he nodded that he'd be
alright.

"Billy," Paul whispered as he got close.  The boy looked at him, his face
pale.

"You're okay?" Billy asked.

"I'm fine.  I know you didn't mean to knock me down," Paul said.  "But what
you said...."

"I told you, Paul.  When it comes to it, I'll probably always be a coward!"
Billy said, putting his head down.

"Billy, we'll talk about this when I get home, okay?" Paul said.  "I just
wanted to keep you safe, and going with Robert was stupid!"

"I know, but I was pissed!" Billy said.  "I don't have any right to be, but
I was!"

"Why?" Paul asked.

"I saw you with that guy!" Billy exclaimed.

"Billy, we talked about this!  He wants to take me out on a real date!"
Paul contended.  "I told you, I'm not going to miss out because we've got
our secret tryst!"

Billy looked off into the dark and said, "Are we done then?"

Paul looked at him carefully and said, "No....  I'll tell him I'm seeing
someone else but not exclusively, but if it goes anywhere with him, Billy,
I can't just keep pretending!"

"I'm not pretending," Billy said, raising his voice a little.  "What I feel
is real!"

"I know that!  I really do!  But I can't keep pretending that one day
you'll figure out that we could have it all!  That I'd give you everything
if you could give it back!  I can't give up a real chance for a hope!" Paul
tried to explain.  Billy nodded, acknowledging him, but said nothing.  "I
wish ... Billy I'd give anything for it to be different!"  And then Paul
began to walk away.

"Paul?" he called softly.  "Can I come by Friday night?"

"I'll clear my calendar," Paul smiled over his shoulder, and he was
heartened to see Billy smile back at him just a little.

Paul settled down between Jim and Seamus, and instantly felt a new conflict
in himself.  Jim AND Seamus.  Jim was perfection itself, but Jim, Paul told
himself still, was straight; Seamus was beautiful and masculine all at
once.  But Seamus was available, gay and interested: the trifecta!  And
still every inclination in Paul screamed at him to lean over and lay on
Jim, to let Jim hold him and take care of him; Jim would make everything
better.  So Paul sat up straight and tense between the two boys who liked
him best, occasionally staring across the distance where sat the boy who'd
loved him first.

Slowly, he got drawn back into the conversation, and a little of the
tenseness drained away.  He caught Jim watching him carefully, watching to
make sure he was alright, and he felt a warmth in his chest.

Dean finally rose and said, "All aboard!  I gotta get home guys!  It's been
different, man," he laughed, smiling at Jim and clasping hands with him to
pull the big boy to his feet like he was a rag doll.  Then he gave him a
big hug.  Paul stood and shook his hand timidly.

Conrad gave Jim a complex fist-bump and said, "See you round!"  Then he
winked and waved at Paul.

Seamus shook hands with Jim and hugged Paul, whispering, "I can't wait to
see you!"

"Me too," Paul said, blushing.  But as the boy walked off, Paul said, "Wait
a second," and hurried after him.  At a distance, no one could hear Paul
say, "I should tell you something....  There IS someone else I've been
seeing."  He could see Seamus was disappointed, but he quickly added, "But
he won't go out with me.  It's getting old, and I told him if someone came
along who'd treat me right, I'd see where it goes."

Seamus smiled, "So let's go out a couple of times and see where it goes!"
Seamus got an impish look on his face and quickly leaned in and kissed Paul
on the cheek.  "It was really cool of you to come clean about that!"
Paul's hand rose involuntarily to his face and he blushed fiercely, making
Seamus laugh.  "Oh, we're gonna have so much fun!" he said before jogging
off to hop in with his friends.

When Paul returned to the fire, Jim was gone and so was Danny, so he sat
next to Christina and said, "Where are our ... I mean where are Danny and
Jim?"

"Where are our what?" she asked with a grin.

"Never mind!" he exclaimed.

"Jim walked down to the lake and Danny went to talk with him," Christina
said.

"Wow, to be a fly on that non-wall," Paul said.  "The silent man is having
a talk?"

"I know, right, but Jim's looking pretty frazzled, what with Billy and
all," Christina said.

"And all?" Paul demanded.

"Well, the look on his face when you fell!  He looked like he was going to
murder Billy and then when he saw you were hurt, he looked like he was
going to pass out.  And then there's Seamus," she said carefully.

"What about Seamus?" Paul asked.

"Paul, think about it!" she demanded.  When he looked at her confused, she
huffed and shook her head.  "When Seamus asked you out, there was this look
of panic on Jim's face, and then he just ... I don't know...."

"If he was interested, he would have said something," Paul declared.  "He's
never said anything to even hint that he might be!"

"He's never said anything, but he's done plenty!  He wants to be with you
all the time!  He takes you out to places guys don't take guys!  ICECREAM?
For fucks sake, you're dense!" Christina insisted.

Paul fumed, but the logic was impeccable.  "I can't risk our friendship!"

"And he's probably thinking the same thing when he doesn't say, 'I love
you, gay boy!'" Christina huffed, making Paul laugh.  "So Seamus is a total
hunk of meat, though!"  Now Paul laughed harder, as she let him off the
hook.

Down by the water, Jim stood skipping stones.  Danny walked up next to him
and stood silently, watching the dark water ripple.  But it was Danny who
broke the silence.  "Damn it, Jim, you're a pussy!"

Jim looked over at his friend and saw no smile, no hint of humor at all,
and said, "Probably true.  Anything in particular calling for that
diagnosis?"

Danny said, "YEAH!"  Gesturing with his thumb over his shoulder at the
fire, he said, "What the fuck was that back there?"

"Paul didn't want me to hurt him!" Jim said.

"Don't be a fucking moron!  I'm talking about Seamus!  You're just gonna
let him go out with Paul?" Danny asked.

"Paul deserves to be happy," Jim said.  "Seamus is a nice guy."

"Seamus is awesome!" Danny said.  "He's the strongest half-back in the
city, and he's the nicest guy you'll ever meet.  And he's not TOO BIG A
PUSSY TO ASK OUT A DUDE HE LIKES!"

Jim turned to face him with a glower in his face and anger in his eyes.
"SHUT UP!"

"What are you gonna do?  Get mad at me and stand there like a fucker?"
Danny taunted.

"SHUT UP!" Jim bristled.  "BACK OFF!"

"Oh, is he angry now," Danny laughed, and then he shoved Jim in the chest.
Not hard enough to knock him over but hard enough to annoy and belittle
him.  He pushed him right to the edge of losing it and then got all up in
his face, chest-to-chest, and growled, "I'm the scariest mother fucker in
this town, so why is admitting it to your best friend scarier than getting
your ass kicked by him?"

Rage and pain etched Jim's face and set it in a mask for a split second
before his bottom lip trembled and he leaned forward and put his head on
Danny's shoulder.  Danny put his arms around Jim and let the boy cry on his
shoulder until he felt Jim stop shaking.

"Tell me about it?" Danny whispered and Jim shook his head.

"I can't," Jim pleaded.

"You can, Jim!  You don't have to tell anyone else, but talk to me!" Danny
said.

"I'm gay," Jim whispered.

"No shit?" Danny said sarcastically and squeezed him tighter.  "And...."

"And I'm falling in love with Paulie," he said, the first time he'd ever
admitted it in words.  He'd known it but hadn't wanted to say it even to
himself.

"So what the fuck are you waiting on, Jim?  It's you he wants!" Danny said.
"Seamus is just what's on the menu!"

Jim laughed and shook his head.  "There's something else," he said, looking
nervous.

"What?" Danny asked.

"I promised I wouldn't say anything, Danny!  Paul told me in confidence.
"Give me your WORD you won't tell Christina?" Jim asked.

Danny looked stunned, and he shook his head.  "Don't tell me!"

Jim smiled and nodded.  "There's something else, and just trust me.  When I
think he's willing to choose me, I'll lay it all on the line!"

"It's your call, dude," Danny said.  "I just want you to be happy, and I
bet that boy could make you ten kinds of happy," he added with a wink.
"Especially if he's anything like his best friend."

Jim laughed and confided, "Just being out here alone with him as it is
makes me ten kinds of happy."

"Dude, you are hopeless!  But ... in the meantime what are you going to do
about Seamus?" Danny asked.

"Seamus is a nice guy," Jim said.  "He won't hurt Paulie, but he's got a
short attention span...."

Danny looked unconvinced and said, "You sure Paul won't work the same magic
on Seamus that he worked on you, dude?"  That was an uncomfortable thought,
but Jim brushed it aside.

***

Jim and Paul walked out into the woods toward their little camp, having
doused and buried the fire and cleaned up a little.  Neither of them wanted
to think about the sounds that had begun to emanate from the cabin as they
beat a hasty retreat.

When they got to the tent, Jim turned on the lantern and quickly stripped
down and crawled inside.  Paul was a little more uncomfortable undressing
in the open, so he took longer as he looked around, which was fine by Jim
who watched him carefully from the ground.  The boy's small body nearly
glowed in the lantern light, smooth and taught, only under his arms showing
the least amount of body hair.  Then Paul shimmied into his sleeping bag.

The tent was a small, two-man pup-tent, and Jim could feel Paul through the
two sleeping bags pressed against him.  He wished there were nothing there,
wished he could ask the boy to zip the bags together and feel Paul's smooth
body pressed into him.

"So, you're going on a date with Seamus?" Jim asked.  "What will your
mystery boy think?"

"He'll have to deal with it," Paul said.  "Seamus is willing to take me
out, and like you said, I deserve that much!"

"Yeah," Jim said.

"What do you think?" Paul asked unexpectedly.  "About me and Seamus?"

"I think ... Seamus is one of the nicest guys," Jim said, "but he dates a
lot and is sort of casual about it.  Or he has been so far."  Jim paused
and said, "You're special.  If anybody could settle him down, it's you."

Paul blushed and said, "You're sweet!"

They turned out the lantern and tried to go to sleep.  But it was getting
chilly and they both had a lot to think about, so they lay awake, each lost
in his own world, until sleep crept in.

***

In the morning, Jim woke first and dressed.  In the light, you could see
the cabin from the tent, so he walked out into the clearing and finished
cleaning up.  Danny joined him a few minutes later and said, "Morning, bud!
You get laid last night?"

"I wish," Jim joked privately.

"Well I did," Danny said, stretching and smiling.  "Twice!  And once this
morning!"

"Horndog!" Jim said.

"She's worse," Danny laughed and helped him start getting everything put
away and packed into the car.  When Paul wondered groggily over and yawned
they both laughed at him.

"What?" Paul asked.

"Your hair!  It's terrible," Jim said, laughing.

Paul yawned again and retorted grumpily.  "Fucking Bravo, man!  Everybody
thinks they're Queer Eye!"

Danny laughed and patted him on the shoulder.  "You got that right," Danny
said with a wry look that only Jim could see.  "Christina's decent, so go
in and primp!"

"Whatever!" Paul said with a smile before winking at Jim and kissing Danny
on the cheek, causing the unflappable boy to blush a radioactive shade of
purple.  "I should have smacked him on the ass, football style," Paul said
before he went inside.  The boys heard him and Christina laughing shortly,
presumably at their expense.

"Dude," Danny asked, "what are you doing?" shaking his head and laughing at
Jim.

"Hell if I know," Jim said, shrugging.

An hour later they were on their way home.  They stopped at the Waffle
House and had breakfast together before splitting up.  When Jim dropped him
off, Paul seemed reluctant to get out of the car.  "You want to come in for
a while?"

Jim smiled enigmatically and said, "I shouldn't!  I've got to get home
sometime today!"

"Alright!  See you tomorrow!" Paul said, waving and smiling as the boy
began to back out.  Paul carried his bag inside and called, "I'm home!"
But no one was there at the moment, so Paul ran upstairs and showered.

As the hot water rolled over his body, he ran a hand down his smooth chest
to grasp his hardening cock.  He'd had no time to relieve himself in
private since Sunday, which was a record since the day he'd figured that
one out!  But as he began to fantasize, he found he had trouble.  Which of
his boys would he dream about?

When he finished up, he dried off and pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms
and a t-shirt and went downstairs for some food.  His mother came out of
her bedroom as he was pouring himself some milk.

"How was the camping trip?" she asked.

"Awesome!" he replied.  "We had a bonfire last night and some of his
friends, and Christina and Danny, came up!  It was so cool ... except when
Billy and Robert showed up and Jim punched him ... and there were three
guys from other schools and one of them is gay AND on his school's football
team and he asked me out, Mom!"

"WHAT?" his mother asked.

"What what?" he asked, cocking his head to the side.

"What to all of it!" she replied.  "You're talking so fast I barely caught
any of that!"

So he began again and told her all about the camping trip, giving her
details about the previous night, how Billy and Robert had shown up and
Robert had been drinking, and how Jim punched Billy.  But he left out the
part where Billy knocked him down, as it had been an accident and she
wouldn't understand.

"Now, tell me about this Seamus!" she demanded with a smile.

Paul gave her a shy grin and described the boy.  "He's so cute, and so
sweet, mom!"

"What about Jim?" she asked.

"Jim thinks he's great," Paul said and took a drink of milk.  His mother
shook her head but bit her tongue.

"Well, after dinner I'm going to start some of the food for tomorrow.  Give
me a hand?" she asked.

"Sure.  I'll run check my email and that kind of stuff and be back in a bit
to help!" he answered and ran upstairs.

He checked his emails, responding to another sweet thank you from Jim, and
telling Billy they were definitely still on for Friday night.  Then he
called Seamus.

"Paul?" the boy answered brightly.

"Hey, Seamus!  I just got cleaned up and thought I'd call you before and my
mom and me get started with the cooking," Paul said.

"Pretty and good in the kitchen," Seamus teased.  "Cha-ching!"

"Just wait until you get a taste of my cooking," Paul grinned into the
phone.

"You say the word and I'm there, Paul," Seamus laughed.  "What are you
doing on Saturday?"

"I'm not doing anything," Paul smiled.

"Can I pick you up at four?" Seamus asked.

"Okay," Paul said, and gave the boy his address.

"See you then," Seamus said, excitedly, "and happy Thanksgiving."

"Thanks," Paul said.  "You too!"



*************************************


Thanks to Robert S for sending me a few corrections!

If you enjoyed this story, you might consider my other on-going stories at
Nifty, Fantasy/SciFi, Things that Go Bump and A Light in the Darkness.

Or, better, send me a note and join my website, jaygordonstories.com, where
you'll find additional chapters of this and other stories!  Registration is
free.

jaygordon_1981@hotmail.com