Date: Sun, 08 Jan 2006 13:31:49 -0700
From: Samuel Forte' III <fallenangel595@hotmail.com>
Subject: finding andrew-chapter 13

** This story is a true story, telling of people and events that have taken
place in the last three to four years. I have the consent of the others who
are involved to use them, but no last names will be used for privacy
reasons. This story will focus around two people as they stumble upon each
during high school and find themselves falling for one another. They are
able to survive the trials, tribulations, and difficulties that are thrown
at them and from each other until everything comes to an abrupt end...All
rights to this story are mine (lol well it is based on MY experiences) so
no copying or publishing without my consent!**


                         Finding Andrew
                  Chapter 13: Making A Choice


     Andrew continued to walk towards me as he was fully dressed now. He
spotted Mario and shot me a cold glare.

"Look. This guy is my friend. I need to talk with him for a few
minutes. Cool?"

"Oh I see. So this is all about him right? I guess I don't mean shit to you
right?"

"You know it isn't like that." Mario overheard and started to walk back
towards the house. I grabbed his arm before he could get away. "Both if you
are going to listen to me. I understand the two of you don't like each
other and that's none of my business...but I do get along with both of you
and its going to stay that way whether each of you like it or not."

"Whatever." Andrew said as he turned to walk back. "If you still want to be
friends with him, there is really something wrong with you."

"Oh, excuse me!" Mario yelled as he turned to face Andrew. "You act like
you're all perfect and such an angel. Do I need to remind you of what you
did to him not to long ago." They continued to argue as I just stood there
and watched. I was really getting the feeling that there was no way to win
with them.

"Fine guys." I said as they both turned to look at me. "I'm not going to
argue with either of you.  Talk to me when you come to your senses." I
walked home as both of them stood in silence. As I reached the top of the
hill, I could hear them start to argue again. I shook my head as I went
home.

     I was left in total isolation for the remainder of my suspension. My
emotions were back under control and I was ready to go back to school. It's
not like anybody was going to be talking to me anyway, but it beat being at
home by myself everyday. My friends avoided calling me or returning my
calls. I couldn't go over to Mario's house to wrestle. Speaking of him, he
wanted nothing to do with me. The only contact I got was Andrew calling to
break up with me. Even that really didn't bother me all that much for some
unexplainable reason. It looked like things were going to back to how they
did at the beginning of the year, which wasn't a real horrible thing.

     When I went back to school that Monday, I got lots of weird looks. I
knew why, but ignored them as best I could. I did feel kind of sad to open
my locker and find no notes from Andrew. I was so used to starting my day
with one. I sat in the library before school to relax before heading to my
classes. I had PE that day so I would have to see Andrew. I was to the
point that I really didn't care how things got between us. Honestly, I was
starting to wonder if the whole thing was a mistake from the
beginning. Things were going fine until this year had begun. Mario and
Andrew had both been good to me at times, but I wondered if the bad
outweighed the good. Was it time to move on and leave them behind? I
pondered that as the bell for 1st period rang. I would at least find PE
cool because I hadn't talked to Justin since the incident.

     As I walked into the locker room the guys kind of gave me a weird
look. Some gave me a pat on the back while others looked a little
intimidated. I wasn't going to let what was starting to happen even get
where it was headed.

"Ok guys. What I did wasn't cool and its something I regret. Yea, I admit
it. I did it and I'm not going to blame someone else for it." I looked
right at Andrew when I said it and he quickly averted his gaze. "I'm not
any different than the guy that you've known all year." I lost what else to
say so I just went to change and leave. I was the first out as I sprawled
out on the gym floor.  Justin sat down next to me gaining my attention.

"Hey Justin."

"Hey bud. That was some crazy..."

"Can we not talk about. I'm sure I'm going to hear it enough in the next
few weeks anyway."

"Cool, cool. Uh, what happened with you and Andrew? He's been acted in a
bad mood lately."

"Ask him. He's the one that wants to be in charge of everything."

"So you guys broke up?" He asked in a whispered tone.

"His choice not mine."

"Are you going to be ok?"

"Of course I will. It's just a person. How many people live on this
planet?"

"Don't say that because I know you well enough to know you don't really
mean it." He was right. I was just planning on keeping my guard up. I don't
really like to have my emotions led all over the place. I just wanted
things to be normal...well as normal as you could expect. I didn't get to
respond as others started to come out the locker room. Class started with
stretching and warmups as always. I learned that we were in our 5th block
and that I got picked for badminton.  I'm not the biggest fan of it, but I
didn't complain. The teams assembled afterwards and it just dawned on me
that I didn't have a partner. I sighed when I saw Andrew headed my way.
Someone, somewhere wasn't too fond of me today.

"Great. Just the person I wanted as a partner." I said in a very sarcastic
tone. He said nothing as we headed to our designated court. We did play
good together (really surprising since neither of us had ever played
before) and ended up winning our three games. As class neared an end, we
made our way back to the locker room. I had to stay behind to be informed
of how many laps I would have to make up...200 plus! That really put me in
a sad mood because that is not something you want to hear so early in the
day. I headed back to the locker room and started to change back into my
regular clothes. By the time I was finished, Andrew was sitting on the
bench across from me and we were alone in the locker room.

"We had pretty good chemistry today." He said gleefully.

"Really? Could of fooled me." I closed my locker and put on my backpack. He
obviously had something on his mind as he blocked the door.

"We really need to sit down and talk."

"I don't think we do, Andrew. You've made your point pretty clear. If
things aren't done the way you want then you aren't happy."

"That's not true..."

"I'm not going to argue with you. You know, its dawned on me in the last
few days that I've been really miserable. And do you know why?"

"..."

"Between you and Mario..."

"Don't try to compare me to him."

"Why not? Both of you are alike. You always want your way and when you
don't get it, you take it out on everybody else. Real mature, huh?"

"Just like you were in the lunch room?"

"At that moment no. I can admit that though. That's something you hate to
do. You hate to be wrong. You even said yourself that you aren't perfect,
yet you act and carry yourself like you are. When you can realize that
you're human like the rest of us, I'll be waiting." And with that, I
left. I really wasn't as ready to deal with stuff as I thought I was. I
ended up going home sick that day as I laid in bed wondering if he would
ever come around. Would he be willing to treat me as an equal? Why was I
trying to change him? How long could I really wait? How long might I have
to? I ended up falling asleep as my mind shut down from the overload.

     I woke to Mike yelling into my ear.

"Get up! Your match is next!" I sat up instantly and frantically looked
around for my gear. I changed there and ran next door just in time. Being
half sleep made it a struggle, but I still managed to get into it
eventually. I did lose, but it wasn't a big deal. I lost to an up and
comer, so there wasn't any reason to be upset or sad. I congratulated him
on the win and started to head back home. I was cut off by the other person
I didn't really want to see just yet.

"Mario, I'm tired. Can it wait?"

"Fine. Just blow me off like always." He said walking away. I still was
tired, but his bitterness forced me to just stick it out a little longer.

"I don't really see how I'm blowing you off when YOU have been avoiding me
the last couple of days. What's on your mind?"

"Us as always."

"What kind of 'us' are we talking about?"

"I don't think you understand how hard it is for me to except things the
way they are. It's like you're taking a knife and just smashing it into my
heart. What makes Andrew so much better than me? Why did you choose him
over me?" I could see the tears begin to form in his eyes. I had to focus
to make sure that I could speak and think clearly.

"Mario, we've been through this a million times. I'm not choosing him over
you. We were best buds before we even found out about each other. I don't
want that to change. That means more to me than anything else. Andrew is no
better than you. You both just offer different things. I'm not trying to
hurt your feelings about this, but we know where each other stands. I've
always said that I'm going to have your back in anything no matter
what. Friends or not. If that isn't something you can handle..."

"You don't understand, Sam." He reached out to hug me as he started to
cry. "I can never be with anybody else. Why can't you feel the same way
about me?" He continued to cry as my mind raced to find a logical
answer. There had to be one right? I reminded silent for a few minutes as I
tried to think of something to lift his spirits, but my mind drew a
blank. I knew the one thing that would, but it was something that wasn't
going to happen. It's not that Mario was a bad person...ok well at times he
has been. But we all have our moments. If we hadn't been such good friends
things might me different...then again, he had been the cause of some
pretty bad stuff in the last couple of months. Maybe it wouldn't be such a
bad idea to give it a shot. This would be something I would have to sit and
think about later, but that wasn't the time.

"I'm sorry that I'm hurting you so much. You have to know that I'm not
doing this on purpose. I don't really know what to tell you."

"I don't know if I can just be friends with you." He said as he backed away
wiping his eyes. That comment stung, but there wasn't anything I could do.

"It's not my choice anymore. We've been through this many times, so I'm
leaving the ball in your court. You know that I still consider you my best
friend. If that's something you can't accept..."

"I'll think about it." We stood in silence for a few minutes until Mike
walked in.

"Everything cool with you guys?"

"Never been better, bro. I was just leaving anyway." Mario said as he slid
out the room. Mike shrugged his shoulders and followed him out. I decided
to go home and get ready for bed. As I showered I wondered how things would
go from here. In a perfect world, I would have the perfect little triangle
between the three of us. I knew that there wasn't a way for that to happen
and I also knew that there was nothing else I could do in the matter. I had
changed a lot since I met Andrew. I became more open with my feelings,
emotions, and thoughts. That also caused myself to be more susceptible to
hurt and pain. I looked at Mario like a little brother. I couldn't see us
stop talking all of a sudden. Both meant a lot to me, but the way things
were headed, I was going to have to choose one over the other. I couldn't
make both happy as trying was only wearing me down. I continued to think a
little more as I dried off and threw on a t-shirt and boxers. It wasn't
like it was my decision anyway at this point. They both knew where I stood
and it was up to them to decide how things played out from here...

****************************************************************************

3:00 in the morning, have to be at work in 3 hours, yet I'm up typing
this. Go figure. I would leave a longer note here, but I do need to at
least get an hour of sleep. Work has been rough of late (40- 60 hours this
week and last), so I'm trying to fit in time to get chapters up. My next
day off is Tuesday so look for the next chapter to be out that day. Take
care guys (and gals...I didn't forget this time)!!

Chapter 14 - Dealing With The Backlash

35