Date: Wed, 19 Feb 2003 00:59:54 -0500
From: Jasin Chau <magic2312@msn.com>
Subject: where love should be found

I bet everybody gets this once in a while.  Or, they are probably obsessed
about this feeling.  This feeling about someone you felt.  They probably
felt this way about this person for a while.  This person they couldn't
talk to because they were too scared.  Not just scared, but also, they were
overwhelmed with hope and possibilities that they could have found it.
They might have found the "one".  The one who can lead them the way to
endless love.

Yeah, I am sitting here rite now, doing absolutely NOTHING with my life.
Yup, I'm just sitting here watching my teacher yap away about things that
don't matter.  The only thing that matter was the view.  My view of the one
I had the hugest crush since the beginning of the year.  I don't know what
about him that made me feel this way.  But this feeling about liking a guy
is making me feel uncomfortable.  I feel like such an outcast.  Everyone is
kissing away and holding hands.

Love is so rare and I think I might have found it.  But I say this to
almost everybody I like.  Could this actually be the one?  Or is it just
another cute face that I am going to pass by.  But this person isn't just a
cute face.  He had a great personality.  I actually knew him.  Not exactly
my type, but he is cute in his own way.  His name was Justin.  Justin had
this cute body build from playing basketball.  He's a little short but that
makes him more cute.  His fine tan from seeing him in the gym locker makes
me wonder how good his skin could feel.  It is so good it makes me want to
taste him.

Well probably by now you are thinking that I am the biggest perve.  But I
am not.  I just have this feeling and I want to spend time with him too and
shit.  Hahaha seriously though, I really do want to be with him in a more
loving relationship.  Not just one of mind blowing sex.  It would be nice,
but that is not what I am looking for.  It is the warm hugs and falling a
sleep in each others arms after sex is what I want.  The commitment of him
wanting to be with me could be the best feeling in the world.  Yeah, I am
kind of girly talking like this, but I can't help the way I feel.

Even though we are fifteen, we both are pretty smooth and hairless.  Just
the body parts, not talking about the privates hehe.  Well I guess its time
to introduce myself.  My name is Bobby.  Well I am just a freshman right
now and life well its great so far.  I am pretty well built for my age.
And girls they tend to call me sweet and hot.  Sometimes I can lose my
temper a little, but that's when something has crossed the line from me
being happy to I am going to kick your ass.  Mostly though I am a nice guy.
This Chinese kid has been having a crush on me in my school.  Yeah I am
that good.  But sorry hes just not my type.  I am in the wrestling team and
yes it could be hard to maintain that thing that keeps going hard, if you
know what I mean.

My stats are crushing, but my crush for this other guy in my school is also
falling apart.  Yeah, theres have been rumors about me being gay and
frankly I don't care.  I know I can be a jerk at times, but I can't lie
anymore.  If people is going to ask me I am going to tell them that I am.
I'm not worried because I am not alone.  I have friends that are always
there to support me.  Like my best friend in the world, Stacey.  She has
been just the best.  Since the beginning of my first day in St. Joeseph
high school till almost the end of this school year, we have never lost
touch.  Right now we are in lunch talking about what we are about to do for
summer.

" YO Bobby!"  Stacy said waving her hands in front of my face, " you did
again, why you always go to lala land and day dream?"

"huh sorry, haha I was just thinking about stuff again."

"OOOOooo you thinking about HIM again."

" NO!"

"Then why your face all red then? O well, lets just finish what we have to
talk about, k?  What are we going to do over the summer?" Stacy asked.

"Well," I said about to day dream again.

Sigh. won't it be nice to just lay around the park and laying next to my
boyfriend.  The sun is shining and my boyfriend's face is more beautiful
than ever with that charming smile of his.  It couldn't stop me if I could,
the attraction of his being, pulling me in for the kiss.

"BOBBY!" Stacy said wining now, "Stop doing that.  Fine I'll think of
something than.  How about we go to the movies this Friday?"

" Yeah, that's a good idea, I've been wanting to watch that new Jet Li
movie," I said.

"Cool than, this Friday remember, we are going to watch some Chinese people
kick some ass!" Stacy said.

Stacy can be to good to be true sometimes.  I sighed and got up as the bell
rung signaling the end of lunch.  The whole lunch room got up and headed
for the door to their next class.  There were too many people to exit all
at once, but people still pushed.  Someone bumped into me and that got me a
little frustrated.  "GOD, watch where you're going, " I said a little loud
while I was about to push the person back.  But I couldn't help, but stare
at who bumped into me.

He stood there looking at me about to apologize, " Dude, I'm sorry.  Hey!
Don't I know you from wrestling.  I saw you wrestle, but you didn't do to
good at the last match."

What is this person's deal.  First, he bumps into me and now he is not
exactly giving me a compliment.  I would of got mad, but for some reason he
suppressed my anger.  He actually made me blush a little.  What?  Why am I
blushing?  I kind of put my head down a little shy to look at him.

" Huh, yeah I didn't do to good.  I was a little distracted," I responded.

" Well, my name is Justin.  I play basketball around here and I sometimes
get a chance to see people wrestle.  Our school isn't exactly supportive
for the wrestlers, but I hope you do good and see us play basketball too
sometimes."

" Yeah, I think I need to show a little school spirit," I said in a
sarcastic way.

" Haha, nah you don't have to, but it would be nice if youz and others come
by.  I need more people shouting my name when I break someone's ankles," He
said while imitating someone's ankle being hurt after his cross over.  " I
gotta go to class, nice meeting you.what's your name?"

" Bobby," I told him, also giving him a handshake.  Wow, he had a good
handshake with soft and delicate fingers.  Can he be anymore perfect?  The
day just went by quickly and it was the end school and I had to go to
practice for wrestling.  I had to wear this stupid wrestling outfit which
people say I look like Gumby.  But wrestling is fun.  I would try as hard
as possible to do good at something I started.  I never give up, on
anything.  Hard work comes to mind when I think of myself because nothing
to me comes easy.

After all that work out and practicing moves for our next match up with
other schools, I was tired.  Exhausted and cramping up, I took a bench to
watch the basketball players play for a while.  There's Justin playing
basketball, sigh.I want to talk to him again.  He seems like such a nice
guy and all.  Then while I was sitting there watching Justin, this guy who
was sitting close me said, " Hey, I see you are looking at Justin.  You
like him don't you?"

I turned around to him surprised in how he knew.  " How." I said but still
so surprised that I couldn't finish what I wanted to say.

" My gaydar is pretty good, I can tell if someone is gay by a mile away."
Said the stranger and he extended his hand and introduced himself, " My
name is Mike.  Don't worry I won't tell anybody.  Actually, Justin was my
ex-boyfriend.  We decided we were better off as friends."

Now I couldn't take in all the news he was giving me.  Justin is gay?  Wow,
I wonder if I have a chance.

" You want to go out with him?" He asked.  " Well, I could try and help,
but don't you think you should do it yourself.  It is more meaningful than
me giving it to you step by step."

" Please. I don't know nothing about going out with GUYS.  Don't we have to
take this, like in a secret location or something?"

Mike only laughed at why I was so concerned.  " Dude, don't worry about.
Think of it as a relationship and not a mission.  Romance is the key and
love is what you should find.  If you don't find it.  He is not for you.
That's why I broke up with what's his name?"

" Justin," I told him with a little angered tone for forgetting his ex's
name.

" Haha, just joking.  You don't have to be so serious.  Look, Justin is a
great guy, but putting the first move is the most important part.  Justin
is too scared to do anything.  Trust me its going to work out.  He is
looking for someone too, you know?

" Really?" I asked

" Really. Now go and get him." He instructed me and pointed at where my
soon to be lover's direction.

I was a little nervous.  No, I was REALLY nervous.  Sweat is like dripping
down from my face now.  My legs were getting weak and I was shaking
visibly.  I headed towards him and was about to say something to him.

He turned around and smiled at me and we talked.



Hope you like THIS story.  Lately I haven't been getting comments from my
stories and I was wondering why.  I hope this one works out.  This is
fictional, but it is about my crush, Bobby.  He is not exactly the gay
type, but I love him anyways.  It is really time for me to move on.  I am
now looking for someone else and it is hard when you compare others to
BOBBY.  He is too good to be true.  Anyways, comment me on my email:

magic2312@msn.com

or my website: www.xanga.com/aznprodigy2