Date: Thu, 19 Apr 2001 07:52:57 EDT
From: Recklissmind@aol.com
Subject: first-boyfriend chapter 4

Ok fellas, this is the last chapter I've written ahead of time. More will
be coming, I promise you. When? I have no clue. Please don't bug. It won't
make it come any faster. :-)

******************************************************************************

********************

      It was only 7:20 when I pulled up at his house. Mine was the only car
parked outside except for one that I recognized to be his. I sat there
nervously, my heart beating wildly, preparing myself mentally for what to
expect. I happened to catch the front window of his house through the
corner of my eye. I saw his sinewy silhouette pacing back and forth on the
other side of it. He's nervous too, I thought. This is a side of Zack I
have never seen before. Zack was never nervous about anything, or at least
he never let on that he was nervous. I was a little more comfortable
knowing this. At least he felt the same way. It leveled the playing field
out a little more.

      With that thought in mind, I decided not to keep him waiting for me
in agony. I got out of my car, walked up to the door and gave the bell a
ring. I saw the silhouette quickly tiptoe to the door. I could tell he was
there but it was still a few more seconds until the door swung open. He
must have been making sure he looked as good as possible for me as I had
done for him.  Maybe he was giving himself a pep talk like I had done
earlier too. I wasn't sure, but at least he was nervous, like I was.

      Anyway, he opened the door and presented himself in a calm and
collected manner. Gawd he was gorgeous. He was wearing a sleeveless black
shirt that was just tight enough to show off his perfectly shaped upper
body and khaki cargo pants. I could tell his attitude was a front, because
Zack is never calm and collected. On a usual day, he was hyper. I wish I
had half the energy he had. He probably didn't even realize it himself.

      "Oh, hey Aaron," he said as if he didn't know it was me. "Come in.
Sit down. Can I get you something to drink?" With that, he turned around to
face me, and since I was so close behind him our faces met, not leaving
even half an inch of space. Looking into his eyes, I saw all of his
pretenses melt.  He grabbed my head, just the way he had done
earlier. Something was different this time though. It was as if this time
it wasn't about pent-up lust. It was passionate and romantic and caring!
Maybe because I had decided earlier that I was in love with him, it changed
things for me. I could feel it, the love being exchanged in the kiss, not
just given. I didn't want to stop, and apparently neither did he. I'm sure
if someone had been timing us that first of all, their jaw would have been
on the floor, but secondly, we would have definitely passed the five-minute
marker.

      It was like he was reading my mind again, because I needed to come up
for air. All of a sudden our lips parted, but our embrace stayed intact.
We just looked at each other for a few seconds until he said, "Let go,"
with a big smile. "No," I replied. "You first."

      We both chuckled about the shared unwillingness to part from the
other. As if we had come to a silent agreement, we simultaneously let go of
one another.

      Finally, we broke the embrace. After a pregnant, awkward pause, he
said, "I'll just grab my keys and we'll go for that walk." With that, he
grabbed his keys and we were out the door.

      It was a cool spring night. The weather couldn't have gotten better.
The sky was completely clear; not a cloud in sight, and all of the stars
twinkled above the trees in the park. We walked silently for about ten
minutes when Zack reached over and grabbed my hand. My face must have
reflected my worry about him doing this in public, because he said, "Don't
worry. There aren't many people around, and the people who are old and
probably just think we're good friends." We laughed as we approached a
bench and sat down. He put his arm around me and began, "So how do you feel
about all of this?"

      Funny he should ask that..."I'm not sure," I admitted pensively. "I
haven't really been able to sort it out in my head yet. I think I'm
happy...no, well... I know I'm happy. I just haven't decided what to expect
this to come to. This is my first actual relationship with a guy, ya know."
      "Really? Ever done anything with a guy?" he pried.
      "Before you? No," I said shyly.
      "Wow," he said. "So how was it, being your first time and all?"
      "It was great, though I wish I could have reciprocated."
      "Oh, don't worry, there'll be plenty of time for that."

      We sat there on the bench, holding each other underneath the perfect
spring night sky. We talked about our families and childhoods, what it was
like for us growing up. I wanted deeply to get to know him. I know that a
lot of guys complain about the 'awkward, getting-to-know-you' phase of a
relationship. I couldn't understand why, though. Maybe because it wasn't as
awkward for us. It was actually fun: I was now beginning to see Zack in a
different light.

******************************************************************************

********************

I hope you all like it so far. I've counted 69 emails, all positive, and 7
Instant Messages, positive as well, so I suppose I don't have to hope.
This is more feedback than I had ever expected, but I am loving it! I
always reply to everyone's email, so keep 'em coming! I have now idea where
this is going next, so if anyone has any good suggestions, please email
me.I'd be most greatful!!  Recklissmind@aol.com. Love you guys. You'll hear
from me in a bit. -Ryan