Date: Tue, 01 Dec 1998 19:36:00 PST
From: "Kenny B." <thrasher59@hotmail.com>
Subject: Happy Chapter 4

Happy


Hi there once again!  Well here's chapter 4!  As I have said before if
you don't want to read about a couple of teens falling in love and doing
the deed then you should have probably stopped reading about three
chapters ago.  If you still think that you don't and you need the name
of a good shrink to get over it then I would be more than happy to refer
you to mine.  If you have been waiting patiently for the sex part all
this time, well here we go.  This is probably gonna be a little rough
since I am describing something that hasn't really happened yet and am
just kind of working on what I think it would be like!

If you have any questions or comments or suggestions, don't be shy, I
love to get email at thrasher59@hotmail.com.  But please if you just
want to bitch then find someone else, I am well versed in the use of the
delete function.  Also if this sort of thing is illegal or you aren't 18
yet you shouldn't really be reading this.  But you are going to any way
so please at least don't get caught.  Sometimes my mom isn't as
understanding as Bryan's and I really don't need to give her another
reason to bitch after she saw my Calc. Grade.


Happy
Chapter 4


     Corey lunged back in like a bird of prey and made it pretty
apparent that he had no intention of stopping unless I started screaming
rape.  His hands were all over me and I had to admit it, my body was on
fire!  Every time that his tongue brushed against the inside of my mouth
and every place that his hands touched just seemed to be charged with
electrical energy.  I pulled him down beside me, hungrily kissing him
back with all the penned up passion of the last two weeks and all the
desire that a 14-year-old could express.  I couldn't get enough of him
and as I started to let my hands wander across his flat chest and tight
stomach was rewarded with one of the sexiest sounds that I had ever
heard.  It wasn't really a moan, it was more of a whimper and it was
just so cute that I couldn't help but break our lip lock and look down
into his eyes as I continued to let my fingers lightly brush over his
smooth skin.

     He laid back with his eyes closed and I just kept gently petting
his chest and torso.  Lightly tracing little designs on his bare skin as
I looked at his closed eyes and slightly opened but smiling mouth.  I
shocked myself when I actually found myself tracing the outline of a
heart around one of his dime size dark nipples.  His body was just so
perfect!  How can I fit in to words the way that it felt to have that
smooth silky feeling as I ran my fingers over every inch of his chest?
How do I tell you that I was just so happy to hear him moan my name as I
slowly and quite cruelly ran the fingers of both hands down the flanks
of his tight abdominal muscles?

     I wasn't even really all that concerned with the object of the
majority of my fantasies, which was obviously tenting out his boxers!
Just having him laying there next to me, with his body responding to my
every whim had already blown away every hot masturbation fantasy that I
had ever had.  And judging from the wet spot that was slowly making the
white and light blue cotton of his boxers transparent, he felt pretty
much the same.

     How come nobody ever wrote about this?  I mean everyone talks about
the smell and the taste, hell I had never really had either but I could
have told you all about them.  But just the way his skin felt.  The
minute contractions of his tight musculature, the way that the goose
bumps followed my fingers, and the way that the almost non-existent hair
seemed to stand on end when I wasn't quite touching his skin!  It was
like even his skin was reaching out to touch me!  I just couldn't get
enough.

     I don't know how long I kept at it.  Hell if he had let me I would
probably still have been there in Saturday morning and well into the
night.  I was happy just to finally be able touch him and to know that
those sounds that he was making and the way that he was breathing was
because of what I was doing to him.  It was wicked and wonderful, and to
be honest with you, I was on the edge myself just from watching his
reaction to my wandering hands.

     But he made it pretty clear that he had other ideas.  He pushed up
on his elbows and gently kissed me again before rolling me all the way
over on to my back and gently holding my shoulder down so that he was
free to roam my body with his hands.  He slowly began to explore my
chest and stomach just as I had done to him.  His fingers were so light
but I could have drawn a roadmap across everywhere that they touched!
The pleasure was so intense that it bordered on pain and I had to stuff
about half of one of my down pillows in my mouth to keep from screaming
at the top of my lungs.

     The feelings that his loving hands were giving me were so intense
that I almost had to tell him to stop, but somehow I made it through it.
He must have touched every inch of my smooth skin between my jawbone and
pelvis with those magical digits.  I was in ecstasy and it was obvious
by the grin on his face that I caught as I was squirming under his
gentle touch, that I wasn't alone!

     Then he did it!  The fingers of one of his hands were gently
probing my belly button.   It's not really a whole lot to look at.  It's
a really shallow `inny' and no where near as sexy as some that I had
seen on the net, but none the less it felt really awesome to have him do
it.  I was totally enjoying it and thought that it couldn't get any
better when he reached down to take my right nipple in to his mouth!  My
back arched and all of the air came out of my lungs like an air lock
decompressing in deep space!  It was the first time that another guy had
ever touched my body with his tongue and I don't know why I didn't cum
right then!

     Now don't get me wrong, I was far from innocent and had read all
about guys sucking on other peoples nipples and even tried playing with
my own when I took matters in hand.  But up until that point I had never
really thought that it did anything for me.  God!  Did he ever prove me
wrong!  My body went into more contortions than most circus acrobats can
stand and I really did bite a hole in the pillowcase.

     I couldn't take it any more and with a stifled cry I vaulted on top
of him.  I straddled his hips with my pelvis and reached down to grab
his hands pressing him into the bed with my weight.  I started to grind
on top of him, our trapped members rubbing against each other as I
reached down to suck on his long graceful neck where the live of his
collarbone was.  He moaned quietly and I sat back up to look down into
his face as our pelvis's continued in their own `sword' fight.

     I could feel my balls start to tighten up and I knew that it just
wasn't going to be long before the rising tide over took me.  I wanted
to finish, but there was no way that I was going to let this be over so
fast.  I had wanted this so bad for way too long for that.  I lifted up
on my knees so that there was nothing but the minimum of contact and
most of that was from the brush of our boxers.

      "God no!  Please don't stop!"  Corey said with an absolutely
adorable whine.

      "Not yet dude!  Just be a little patient!"  I said.

      I rolled off of him and lay down next to him with every inch of
the length of my body touching him.  I even draped my left leg over his
as I once again reached up with my lips to gently caress his before
burying my tongue in his mouth.  I slowly ran the tips of my fingers
from a point between his nipples all the way down over his cute belly
button, stopping at the waistband of his boxers as I once again pulled
my hungry lips from his.

     "Can I touch it?" I said.

     "Please!" He said.

     I giggled a little at that and ever so slowly wanting to get
everything I could out of this, slid my hand inside the waistband.  The
tip of his rigid penis was actually just inside and something was just a
little strange.  It was wet, but it felt like there was something
wrapped around it.  I couldn't figure out what it was but I just had to
wrap my hand around it even though I was mightily curious.  It felt
really soft but oh so hard at the same time, and unlike mine the skin
just seemed looser somehow.  This was the first time that I had ever
really touched someone else's, so I just put it up to inexperience.  I
could feel the beat of his heart and the way that he moaned when I
slowly pushed downward on it was absolutely awesome!

      I just had to see it!  I had never really had the need to do
something so bad in my entire life, and for once when it cam to my
sexuality I wasn't going to have to hide it!  I reached down and pushed
his boxers down.  They would only go so far, because he was lying down
so I grabbed the front and pushed it down.  I gasped as the head of his
cock came into view!  He wasn't circumcised!  "HOLY SHIT!"  I said.
"It's got a hoodie!  That's too cool!"

      We both broke out laughing, and Corey reached down and gently
smacked me in the head.  "You little shit, you only wished yours looked
that good!"

     He didn't know how right he was.  All the cutest guys that I had
ever seen on the net had uncut ones and I had always wished that mine
wasn't.  I just loved the way they looked and now that I had actually
touched one had to say that was kind of fond of that too.  And besides,
not only was he as big as me, but his egg shaped testicles were even
larger than mine and hung perfectly below it in the pebbled skin of his
hairless ball sack.  Just like me the only hair that I could find on his
entire body was a small patch just above his penis.

     I had thought about it a couple of times, but to be honest the idea
of sucking someone's cock had never really appealed to me.  I had always
thought that it would have to taste bad or something, I mean come on, I
had smelled pee and I wasn't one of those people that it did anything
for.  But sitting there looking at his bone, drooling, throbbing, and
bouncing, as it was when I touched it, I just had to have it!  Before I
thought about what I was doing and changed my mind, I pounced.

     I was a little excited and tried to take all seven inches at once.
Needless to say I didn't succeed.  In fact I gagged and popped right
back off.  But the moan that I got from Corey was more than enough to
make me try again.  This time I eased over the head and started applying
my tongue.  I knew that my head was really sensitive when I was that
hard so it only seemed logical that his would be too.  I guess I was
right because as I darted my tongue underneath his foreskin he went
totally crazy.  He moaned and I felt his fingers as they wrapped around
my head in a vice like grip.  I let his hands guide me and slowly slid
further down his cock, keeping my lips tight to it as I went.  Because I
was coming down from above, the head of it was right against the head
for the whole trip and I mercilessly teased it.

     This was just so awesome.  I had been a broken hearted little boy
ten minutes ago and now I was sitting here pleasuring Corey, who I
already thought of as `my man' with my mouth!  It didn't feel totally
comfortable, but then I just wasn't used to it yet, and I was pretty
sure that it would only get better as I got more practice!  I had never
really thought of myself as a `cocksucker', but I was surely going to
think again!  I was so hot that I was getting more pleasure from this
than I normally did when I whacked it and I wasn't even touching it!

     Not wanting to miss anything now that I had discovered just how
wonderful it was to have him in my mouth, I moved further down on the
bed and slowly rotated around the head of his penis so that I was lying
between his tight legs.  I couldn't get as far down this way but I found
out that working the front of his cock with my tongue in overdrive
really did it for him, and he liked it when the head of his cock scraped
on the roof of my mouth.  His fingers had gotten much lighter on my head
and he was massaging my scalp like the girl that cuts my hair when she
washes it, but a thousand times better.  I couldn't help it and as I
started to bob up and down on his knob faster and faster, I started
humping the bed, the friction of my rock hard cock feeling so awesome.

     "Oh god Bryan!  I'm gonna cum!"  Corey said.

     Now this was a dilemma!  I had never given a blowjob before, and
even though I had tasted my own, I wasn't sure that I wanted some one,
even Corey cumming in my mouth.  I tried to think about it for a second.
I really didn't want to stop sucking this wonderful thing, and I could
feel my own meat getting close as I humped faster and faster on the bed.
Corey wasn't the only one about to shoot!  Fate and inability to
concentrate and make a decision took the choice out of my hands.  I
didn't know what I wanted to do and took too long making up my mind so
the inevitable happened.

     I felt Corey's cock head swell even further and his hands push down
on my head just a little harder as his body seemed to go rigid and even
harder than his cock.  His breath exploded from him in a loud moan and
suddenly his cock was pulsing like something in a science fiction movie.
With each pulse my mouth was filled with a warm fluid that was even
hotter and that was kind of salty and a little bland at the same time.
It felt really good to have it in my mouth even though I didn't think it
would ever replace Coke as my favorite drink.

     The way that his cock was jumping around like it had a life of its
own and the way he was moaning was just too much for me.  I moaned
around his spurting cock and unloaded my self right there into my boxers
going crazy on his shooting rod the whole time!  It was the most intense
orgasm that I had ever felt and it didn't bother me a bit that I was
getting my bed and my underwear all dirty.  I reached up and gently
massaged his scrotum wanting it all now, shit if I was going to do it,
might as well do it right!  Finally it was just too much for him and he
reached down to force my head off of his still hard cock.

     "Shit, dude, chill!  You want me to go blind or something?"  He said.

     "I don't care just as long as that still works!"  I said, looking
at his rod.

     I felt so content and I just laid my head on his pelvis looking up
at his gorgeous face.  He had a smile on his lips and his eyes were
shinning like he had his own private stars.  He was perfect, and for the
first time, in a very long time I was totally happy.  I didn't know that
I was crazy about being a crazed fag in heat, but I did know that I was
crazy about him and I was going to make sure that I made him very happy.
I thought of all the times that I had stared at him or thought of him
and dreamed, and as I let his cum dribble down the back of my throat, I
knew that they hadn't even come close to the real thing.

     "It's your turn!"  He said with an evil grin.

     I rolled over to show him the wet spot on my Mickey boxers and
grinned, "You're a little late dude, I already had the party without
ya!"  I giggled as he looked at it and smiled and added, "Well I did
have a little help from a friend!"  As I gently reached over and kissed
his still respectably hard bone.

     It was really weird cuz in all my fantasies, never once did it go
beyond the point of the cum shot.  I always just finished it there and
never thought of what it would be like afterwards.  I thought about it
and was more than just a little troubled to find that even though it was
obvious that we were both able, I didn't really want to do it again so
much as just cuddle up next to him and let him hold me and hold him.  I
thought about seeing Scott and Justin downstairs and wondered what it
felt like to have someone holding you like that and decided as I dropped
my boxers again that I was going to find out.  I reached down and pulled
his the rest of the way off too, just wanting him naked, then slipped
under the comforter and smiled at him.

     "Well are you gonna sit out there all night or are you coming under
here with me?"  I asked.

     He looked at me for a second and I could tell that he was wondering
what I was up to, but he just reached under him and pushed the
bedclothes down and slipped in next to me.  It was really awesome and
somehow both of us just knew.  We didn't even try again right then even
though I am sure that he wanted to as much as I did.  We cuddled around
a bunch of different ways and talked some too, nothing really serious we
were mostly just relaxing, coming down of the most natural high in the
world.  It was a very special time and I couldn't say for sure how long
it lasted.  Eventually we both fell asleep, me nestled up against his
stomach, with my ass pushed back against his pelvis and his arms wrapped
around me.

     I woke up vaguely disoriented.  I knew that it was still very early
because even though there was light coming in from the outside it still
wasn't very strong and that meant that the sun hadn't risen that high
yet.  I felt the weight of Corey's arm around my chest and was once
again flooded with the feeling of total happiness that I had experienced
last night.  I had never even thought that it had been a dream, even in
my sleep I could feel him.  He was still pressed up against my back and
he was holding me almost fiercely.  He was also very aroused and I could
feel the heat from his engorged penis, nestled between the cheeks of my
ass.  I was a little concerned, I had no intention of letting him do
that, but it did feel really good and I couldn't help myself from
squeezing the cheeks of my ass to massage his cock.

     I had thought he was sleeping, but a chuckle from him dispelled
that notion.  "Morning sleepy head."  He said.

     "Uhm." I yawned as I stretched.  "Yeah it is!"  I snuggled back up
to him taking special pains to make sure that his hard on was firmly
pressed between my cheeks.  I didn't really want to get fucked but just
having him knocking on the back door was really erotic.

     "Can I ask you a question?"  He said.

     "You can ask me anything you want." I said.

     "Have you ever done it with another guy?"

     Now this wasn't an easy question, I mean to be totally honest I
would have to admit that I had let Justin whack me off over the summer,
and I didn't want to cause problems in our budding relationship.  But at
the same time I really don't believe in lying and I didn't want to start
our relationship with dishonesty.  It was a small battle and I would
like to think that the forces of goodness and light won out.  "I let
Justin whack me off at summer camp.  That's it except for a couple of
times that I tried doing things with girls."  I looked at him and tried
to figure out what he was thinking without much success.  "How about
you?"

      He looked at me for a second and it seemed like he was going
through the same thing, weighing and deciding whether or not to tell me
something.  "Not really, Scott and me almost did one time but it was too
weird, and well, uhm Justin did the hand job thing to me too."  He
looked uncomfortable for a second and then continued.  "And I have done
it with a girl one time."

     Alarms went of in my head, and I was really scared all of the
sudden.  I had also done a little reading about guys that were in the
closet and tried to hide what they really were by going out with girls.
And I knew from everything that I had read that I just didn't want to
get involved in that!  No way was I gonna play second fiddle to some
fish!  I mean don't get me wrong, I liked girls all right, but not that
way, and now there was no way that I was going to let the guy that I was
pretty sure I was totally and madly in love with go to a GIRL!  "Did you
like it?"

     "It was ok, I mean it was pussy."  He said quietly.

     What the fuck did that mean?  I wanted to rant and rave, what the
hell had we just done if he was into pussy?  I didn't know what to think
and feel, but I was pretty sure that none of it was good.  I was pretty
sure that I had just fallen in love with someone and he was talking
about pussy not 8 hours after I let him drop a load on my tongue?  I
felt like someone had just driven a stake through my heart.  I was
really afraid to ask the next question, but it had to be asked and I
hated myself for even being afraid to ask it!  "Was it better with me?"
My voice even broke.  I was such a loser!

     "Are you kidding?  It wasn't even close dude!"  He squeezed me a
little tighter, and pulled me back into him, grinding his rod between my
cheeks a little while he laughed.  "That's like asking would I rather
beat off with sand paper or lotion dude!  I just barely got off and that
was because I was thinking of someone else!"

      It was all good!  I could like think straight again.  And speaking
of straight, his cock certainly was!  The heat that it was radiating
could be felt all over my lower back, and I could swear I could actually
feel it on my tender little hole.  I had fingered myself a couple of
times and it was kind of cool but it really kind of hurt too and I
hadn't ever really been in a huge hurry to do that.  But as I sat there
and started to think about it I couldn't help but moan a little and push
further back into his throbbing rod.  What would it actually feel like
to have that big thing in me?  Would I be able to take it?  Would he hit
my prostate?  What would it feel like if he did?  I couldn't help it,
the things I was thinking were just going right to my body and in
particular one part, my ass!

     Without even thinking about it, I had started to squeeze his cock
in rhythm with his thrusting.  I had thought that it was awesome to have
him in my mouth but this was almost as heavenly.   I could hear his
breath get a little faster and he let out one of his little whiny moans
again.  God how I loved that sound!  I had never heard anyone make it
before in my life but I was pretty sure that I would never get tired of
hearing it, and believe me when I say that I was going to try to make
him do it a lot!

     I was really starting to get into it and just about to make him
stop so that I could go get some lotion out of the bathroom so that I
could get him all slippery when he stopped all on his own.  I couldn't
help it, and moaned in disappointment.  "Why did you stop?  Don't you
want to do it?"

     "Oh yeah, buddy, but I have other plans right now!"  He said in a
low throaty whisper that sent shivers all the way down my spine.

      Without saying another word he roughly pulled me over on to my
back and kissed me deeply, shoving his tongue into my mouth.  His hands
began to explore me, not lingering any one place to long but just
generally making my entire body sing the hymn of love.  My entire body
burned with the need of him and I could tell by the look in his eyes as
he took my nipple in his mouth that he was feeling the same.  His tongue
was so hot and I was moaning so much that it was practically non-stop.
I thought that I was never going to feel any better, then he used his
teeth!  He didn't bite really hard, but it was enough.  It sent an
electric charge right through the very core of my being!

     I arched my back and couldn't help but hear him giggle a little at
my reaction to his oral ministrations.  I remembered the power I felt
when I was doing this to him and couldn't help but wonder if he was
getting as much out of this as I did earlier in the darkness.  I looked
further down his body at his pole and had to surmise by the way it was
jumping around and leaking almost as much as my own that he was.  I
could hardly believe that anything could feel so good as he began to
work his way further down once again.  He was so good at this, his
tongue just like his hands never staying in one spot too long.  It was
indescribable.

     He reached my navel and slowly probed gently with his tongue
proving once again that parts of my body that I had never even
considered erotic could be triggers for feelings that I just didn't know
were possible.  It was the best feeling I ever had in my life and it
just kept getting better by the second.  I was starting to think that I
would die before he was done.

     Finally he reached the top of my pubic patch and his tongue was
actually probing around the edges of it from where his cheek was laying
against my pelvis, both of us moaning in concert.  I reached down to
massage his head gently running my hands through his hair and lightly
playing with his ears.  I had never before noticed just how awesome and
cute his ears were.  He had a hoop in his left ear and further up he had
a cuff, I was totally in love with even his ears.  He was just totally
perfect, and I was almost as wrapped up in feeling lucky to have him as
I was in the pleasurable feelings that he was sending through my nerves
with his tongue.

     He explored all the way around the base of my shaft with his
tongue, without touching it.  He was really putting me into orbit and he
knew it and loved it as much as I had enjoyed it last night.  He gently
took one of my nuts into his mouth and then the other, his moans even
louder than mine.  It seemed like he had found a switch, intended to do
nothing but to put my nerves into overload and flipped it on and off
just to see me squirm.  He then went even lower and licked the tender
area just below my balls and even swiped his tongue down into the crack
of my ass and teasing my hole.  He then sat up on his knees and looking
into my eyes as he gently ran his finger tips up my thighs and started
to tease the front of my shaft with his light touch.

     I moaned and arched my back towards him and raised my hips towards
his smiling face.  He slowly wrapped one hand all the way around my
throbbing shaft and picked up his other hand to slide his finger into
his own mouth and sucked it in one of the most seductive manner that I
had ever seen.  Watching him slowly start to manipulate my cock while he
did that and having a pretty good idea what it was for, I almost blew
right then.  I moaned and almost screamed.  Instead of sticking his
finger to my hot hole it was his tongue that began to gently massage my
chute!  I arched my back even further until the only things touching the
bed were the back of my head, my shoulders, and the soles of my feet.  I
couldn't believe he had done that!  The pleasure that was radiating
through my body was intense to almost the point of being unbearable.  I
really felt like I was going to explode!

     I had never really thought about getting fucked before but as his
tongue started to delve deep into my ass, I couldn't help but think of
how awesome and complete it would feel to have him so close to me that
he was actually in me.  I knew it was supposed to hurt a little at
first, but judging from the way that my butt was feeling right now I
just couldn't understand how anything he did down there was going to
hurt.  The pleasure just seemed to travel over my body in waves and it
was a million more times intense than it ever was when I fingered my
self while jerking off.  Every muscle in my body was tight and I knew
that I was so close to the edge that I was going to cum any second.  I
wanted him to do `it' to me so bad, but no way was I going to ask him to
stop what he was doing and in seconds it was going to be too late.

     He must have sensed this because he suddenly stopped stroking my
hole with his tongue and then stopped touching me all together.  I was
so close and the fire burning across my nerve endings was so shocking,
that I let a wail of exquisite pain escape my lips as it seemed that I
danced on the edge of a razor, almost but not quite plunging into
orgasmic ecstasy, for an eternity.  Finally my body collapsed back on to
the bed and after just a second I was able to lift my head from the
pillow and look down at him.  How could someone actually make me feel
like this?

     I looked down to see what he was doing.  He was just sitting there
his naked body on his knees between my legs.  It was the most erotic
thing I had ever seen in my life!  I was suddenly overcome with the most
powerful emotions that I had ever felt.  What the hell was up with me?
Here I was, still poised on the brink of what felt like the most
satisfying moments of my life, and all that I could think about was how
wonderful it felt to have him here with me, and wonder if he l--l--, uhm,
liked me as much as I l--l--, uhm, liked him.  The sexual charge was still as
strong as ever but, I just felt so complete, because it was so much
more.  The emotion was just charging the physical experience with more
energy!

     I was just getting ready to say something, anything just to hear
his voice when he suddenly dived into my crotch again.  He wrapped his
soft lips around the shaft of my rod and slowly slid towards the base
while running the tongue back and forth across the front of it, driving
me crazy.  He came all the way up to the top of it again and massaged
the head of it with his tongue while sucking so hard that I felt like it
would pop.  I thought that the pleasure couldn't get any more intense,
there was no way that anything would ever feel this good!  Or so I would
have sworn till he slipped his finger into my anal orifice.  It was a
brief instant of pain followed by total pleasure.  It had never felt
like that when I did it to myself!

     He turned the suction up even more as he began to slowly slide the
wet silk of his mouth up and down my pole to the same rhythm that he was
pushing his finger deep into my canal and almost pulling it all the way
out.  I was in such intense bliss that I couldn't do anything even more
than lay there and moan as his tongue and finger brought me closer and
closer to the brink of orgasm.  It seemed like that my cock and my
sphincter were working together to drive me totally insane.  I could
feel the skin of my scrotum tighten up around the bottom of my shaft and
my head seemed to swell as I let out a soft moan.

     "Corey!  I'm going to cum dude!"  I said

     His effort didn't slow for an instant, if anything it only got
stronger.  His head seemed to blur as it went up and down my shaft, and
I could feel his finger find something inside and start to prod it that
made me want to scream at the top of my lungs.  Every muscle in my body
tightened and I thrust my hips deep into his mouth.  My whole body
convulsed as I shot load after hot load deep into his mouth.  I could
feel his throat spasm as he swallowed as fast as he could.  It only made
the feeling more intense.  My body slowly relaxed, totally spent from
the effort of our release.  He slowly slid his mouth off of me and slid
up so that he was laying next to me, looking down at me with his head
propped on my shoulder.

     I turned my head so that I could look into his eyes and was
surprised when I saw nothing but deep satisfaction there when he looked
at me.  I was suddenly as afraid as I was exhausted.  What did he see
when he looked at me?  What did he really feel for me?  How could I know
if I was the one for him, like I was so sure that he was the one for me?
Would I ever be able to look at him again if he didn't love me like I
loved him?  What if he was just looking to get laid like so many of my
other guy friends?  Was I just an excuse for him to feel good?

     I can't tell you how good it felt.  I can't tell you why the tears
came.  I can only tell you that I had never in my life been so happy as
the minute when he snuggled up to me even tighter and whispered so
softly in my ear, "I love you Bryan."  I knew at that minute that
everything was going to be okay, and that no matter what, we were
together and that would be enough.

     If I had only knew just what us being together really meant, and
that just because I was no longer alone that it wasn't going to make
life a bed of roses without thorns!



Well that's it for chapter 4.  I really hope that you liked it.  If you
didn't sorry but you probably shouldn't have wasted all the time that
you did reading this far!  I will try to get chapter five out sometime
in the near future.  Thank you for all of the emails and a special
thanks to Charlie and somebody else new in my life for helping me to
keep it together.  If you have any comments or just want to talk, feel
free to drop me an email at thrasher59@hotmail.com .  The story is far
from over and I hope that you are enjoying reading it as much I am
enjoying writing it!