Date: Sun, 27 Mar 2005 20:43:22 EST
From: Madasonaysha@aol.com
Subject: "I Hate Anthony" chapter 7 Gay- High School Gay- Interracial
Disclamer: See first chapter
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~Other Stories by me currently on Nifty~
"AROUND MY WAY" last updated - March 11
"THE HANDSOME JEWISH YOUNG MAN" last updated - March 17
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"I HATE ANTHONY"
CHAPTER SEVEN: WHERE IS RILEY?
By Maddy A. Dante
"Where the hell is Riley?" Regina asked Brian. Riley hadn't showed up for
school all week. One or two days went un-noticed, but for him not to show
up for the whole week only brought out the concerns of his friends. His
presence was missed and felt by everyone, including Tracy. She missed the little
arguments that they would have. Sure they would pretend to hate each other,
but they really didn't. It was an odd friendship that they shared, but it
was theirs and only they understood it. Brian had an idea of where Riley was
and he was bothered by his thoughts. He knew that Riley's dad had a drinking
problem and tended to beat Riley when under one of his drunken stupors.
Riley had shared that bit of information with him when Brian had discovered him
after one of his fathers session's. Brian knew that he should have told
someone what was happening, but he couldn't betray his friends confidence. No,
Riley promised that if things got too bad he would tell on his father and in
Brian's eyes things hadn't gotten to bad yet. So he thought.
"I don't know. We haven't talked in like four days." Brian replied. The
two of them were on their way to lunch, but Regina needed to stop by the
library. She ran into Brian and he walked with her.
"You think everything is a'ight wit him?" She asked. Although she wasn't
very close with Riley, they were still friendly and she found it odd that he
seemed to just have disappeared.
"Honestly, I don't know. I mean, he's probably okay, but I don't know what
's been up with him lately." He lied. He knew that there was something
bad going on. He felt it in his gut.
"I'm not following you Dizzy." Regina stated inquisitively as she pulled
back her cherry red hair into a bun. Brian couldn't betray Riley's
confidence, but he needed to talk to someone about how he was feeling.
"I don't know, he just seems to be so sad lately."
"I know what you mean. I thought it was just me. Do you think that he is
still sad about his mom?" She asked. When Riley was fourteen his mother had
been murdered in a robbery at the cleaners she worked at and to say that he
had been devastated would be putting it mildly. He was the youngest child and
very much "a momma's boy" It happened right in the middle of freshman
year and he hadn't been the same since. For nearly a year he suffered from deep
depression and had to take medication to ease it. Things that he once
enjoyed doing, such as sports no longer held the same appeal. He went through a
dramatic change. He stopped playing sports and changed his appearance.
People who had heard of his mother's murder on the news would come up to him in
school and give him their condolences and that sickened him. He got so annoyed
with all the strangers coming up in his face that he started to alter his
appearance to keep them at bay.
"I don't think you ever get over losing your parent." Brian replied as they
made their way down the corridor.
"Yeah, you right. Damn what the fuck is wrong wit everybody in dis group.
Everybody is so fucked up. Tracy bony ass can't get a good man, Riley sad
ass is on the low somewhere, you...well I haven't figured out just what the fuck
is up wit you yet. Shit, I'm just glad that
Jacky's mulatto ass is out of dat funky ass mood. I don't know what the
fuck got him so happy, but I'm just glad that he is back to him old self."
Brian was glad too. He saw that change in Jacky and it pleased him. It seemed
that everybody around him was so sad all the time and that could feel
draining. Brian liked to think of himself as a happy, carefree person and when the
people around him were upset he had a tendency to put their problems on his
shoulders.
"I know right. I just hope that everything is cool with Rye."
"Do you want to drop by his house lada?" Regina asked.
"Yeah, but I have a key club after school. Can you wait for me?"
"Key club? You are such a dork!" Regina playfully teased him and Brian
laughed and pushed her. The more time that he spent with her, the more he
liked her. Now that his crush on Jackson was over, he no longer held that
immature animosity towards her.
"Yes, I embrace my geekiness. It's a choice, not a way of life." He
stated matter of factly and they burst out laughing.
The library at their school was impressive. Most schools in the ghetto didn'
t have adequate facilities to nurture the minds of their students, but at
their high school that wasn't the case. Thanks to grants and donations their
high school had some of the best facilities that rivaled the schools of the
suburbs. The library had to be one of the biggest in the state, with book
stacks that traveled up three floors. Although it was filled to capacity with
an endless supply of books that wasn't the main attraction for the students.
There were only two attendants at the library at any given time leaving open
opportunities for the students to wonder alone by themselves. They would
make use of the seclusion and christened the library as a make out spot. The
risk of getting caught was lowest if you hid on the third and last floor
where the books of poetry and plays were located. Regina wanted to check out a
book by her favorite poet Nikki Giovanni so that's where they were headed.
They climbed the three floors until they reached the top, but stopped in their
tracks when they heard arguing. Brian recognized the voices of Anthony and
Lucia. Regina couldn't help but to give into her nosiness and stayed to
watch while Brian rolled his eyes and went into the next isle. Slowly she
crept up and hid behind a book stack to listen.
"I am sorry baby! I didn't mean for that to happen." Anthony pleaded with
Lucia. He was surprised that she agreed to skip class and meet him in the
book stacks. He wanted to get back together with her. Things would be so much
easier for him if he had someone to keep his mind off of things. He didn't
feel like he would be using Lucia since he did care about her, but his heart
didn't belong to her. It belonged to someone else whom he could never share
that with.
"I know baby. But, I am so pissed that you would hook-up with dat bitch!
Fuck Anthony, I thought we had something special!" Lucia shrieked in her New
Jersey born Italian accent. She threw up her hands in frustration and began
to pace back and forth down the book isle. She ran her hands through her
thick, curly, shoulder length blonde hair and sighed in frustration. Her head
was telling her to not to forgive Anthony. Her mother always told her that
once a man cheats, he will always cheat and she didn't want to be in a
relationship where she would have to worry about that. She wanted to be with a guy
who wanted to be with her and only her. In her mind she thought that she
was in love with him and she felt that his feelings were mutual. She couldn't
believe that he would stray away from her especially with someone that she
was supposedly friends with. She knew that she shouldn't get back with him,
but there was just something about him that made her weak in her knees... and in
her judgment. On the surface he was this cocky, machismo guy who thought
that his shit didn't stink. He had this cocky persona that put off a lot of
people at first, including her.
They had met during a basketball game at the beginning of the school year.
Lucia was all too aware of who he was. Anthony's reputation preceded him to
those in and out of his circle. He was a known player; dating and breaking
up with a different girl every week. All the girls knew this yet they always
seemed all too willing to put themselves at his mercy. She thought those
girls deserved what they got once they got dumped. He hit on her one time at a
party and she wasn't even trying to hear it when he came up to her trying to
spit his rap in her ear. Their side had just won the game against their
rivals, East Side High School. The screaming of the spectators filled the
crowded gymnasium with the joy and excitement of victory. Lucia was amused
with the cheery grins of all the basketball players and gazed at them. She
loved how they seemingly evolved from rough playing, tough guys back to the giddy
kids they really were. Then, as if it was fate their eyes met. They knew
each other, but rarely spoke. It was his attitude that put her off and she
never made the attempt to get to know him. She looked over at Anthony and it
was like she had noticed him for the first time. His short, thick black hair
was drenched with sweat and his maroon and white uniform stuck to his lightly
tanned milk colored body. At that moment she saw for the first time what
all the other girls had noticed long ago. Anthony was attractive, there was no
getting around that, but it was something in his eyes that made her want to
get to know him. His dark green eyes held secrets that peaked her curiosity.
They held a mystery that she wanted to solve. After the game Jacky had
thrown a party at his house and it was like everyone in school came. Anthony
was busy shooting pool with Carlos when Lucia decided to go over and introduce
herself. As she was walking towards him she ran into someone, sending them
crashing into Anthony. She recognized the boy from school, it was hard not
to miss him. In their school everyone dressed in the appropriate urban
attire, but not him. On any given day you would see this black kid walking around
with a Linkin Park T-shirt and a pair of skater jeans on. Sometimes he would
wear these black rimmed glasses that just screamed dork. She didn't know
why that guy would do that to himself, it was like he just wanted to get picked
on. The black kids drink flew on Anthony sending him into a rage of curse
words. The kid just stood there silently as Anthony continued to berate him
with insults of how stupid he was. The kid, who looked out of place as usual
wore and Ramon's T-shirt and mumbled and apology before walking away.
Anthony chased the kid down and mumbled something to him that made the kid storm
off in anger. All attraction that Lucia had felt had faded after she saw how
Anthony had treated that guy. She walked off and ignored him for the rest of
the party. It wasn't until two weeks later that they found themselves the
only one's not partnered up at party, that they eventually hooked up and she
didn't regret it. It had been a fun few months and up until he cheated she
thought that every thing was perfect between them. How wrong she had been.
"Baby if you give me one more chance, I swear I won't fuck up again. Come
on! I love you Chi Chi." Anthony pleaded and he knew he had her once he
called her by his pet name for her. He didn't love her, but he needed her
distraction. If they were back together then he could focus on her and not the
thoughts that were driving him crazy. He hated the things that ran across his
mind. Self demons threatening to overtake him. He would not let himself
become what he knew was wrong. What he knew was wrong, but felt right. It
was a selfish fear, but it was his alone.
"Okay. But if you fuck up again its over for good. Do you understand?"
Lucia was weak, Anthony made her that way. She walked over to embrace him
and they hugged for a moment. She didn't realize that they had an audience
until Regina made her presence known. They were the kind of friends who you
hang out with inside of school, but never out of. Regina didn't like Anthony
because of how he treated Brian. She knew that the two of them had been
friends when they were younger and couldn't understand why things had soured
between the two of them. All she knew was that it pissed her off every time he
said or did something to hurt Brian.
"Why da fuck you taking his punk ass back?" Regina asked in her black
ghetto girl vernacular. Lucia looked at her sideways. Part of her wanted to
tell Regina to mind her God damn business, but she knew she was right. Before
Lucia had a chance to respond Anthony did.
"Because we love each other so why don't you mind your own fucking business!
" He yelled. Brian was busy looking at a book to notice the scene that was
unfolding around him. It wasn't until he heard Regina in the process of
loudly cursing someone out that he went into the next isle to see what was
going on. Once he reached Regina he wanted to turn right back around. Anthony
stood staring at Regina coldly with his arm around Lucia. Brian cringed as
he saw Anthony and Lucia's embrace. He quickly regained his composure and
reminded himself that Anthony was something that would never happen. He didn't
even want him...are at least that's what he would tell himself. Everyone had
heard about Anthony cheating on her and knew that she dumped him. Now
apparently they were back together. Against his will, Brian's chest tightened
when he realized this. He fought back the jealous urges by remembering all of
the horrible things that Anthony had put him through over the years. He
thought about the betrayal, the first. The day when his beetle didn't protect
him. `FUCK THAT!' Brian yelled to himself. He didn't need any
protection. He was sick of Anthony walking around like his shit didn't smell. What
made him think that he was better than anyone else. It was one thing to fuck
with him, but now Anthony was fucking with one of his friends and that was
something he shouldn't have done.
"Regina, you cool?" He asked. He pretending not to notice Anthony
standing there, which was hard to do since he was barely three feet away. As soon
as Anthony saw the look in Brian's eyes he unconsciously took his arm from
around Lucia. He didn't realize that he had done that until he felt Lucia's
confused blue eyes looking at him. This intense wave of guilt washed over
him for only the briefest of seconds before he came to his senses. His dark
furrowed eyebrows framed his evergreen eyes. He stepped up to get into Brian'
s face. Pushing away the familiar thrill that ran through his body was easy,
since he had years to perfect it. It was a sad art, but it was his own
creation.
"Why don't you mind your mutha fucking business this ain`t your concern!"
He yelled. He stood almost a foot taller than Brian and out weighed him
by nearly fifty pounds. Brian couldn't help flinching with every harsh word
that came out of Anthony's mouth. He hated how Anthony had this uncanny
ability to bring fear inside of him. Finding the long overdue courage Brian raised
his face to glare into Anthony's eyes. For a second they were both rendered
speechless. The closeness of their bodies created a heat that could not be
cooled. It was a simple touch of chest to chest that triggered it. The
heat became too much for both, as they took half steps backwards away from each
other. Regina regarded Anthony as nothing less than a piece of shit. She
could stand up for herself. Years of living in the ghetto's had given and
edge to her character so she didn't take shit from anyone. She moved past
Brian so she was now standing in front of him . So what if he was seven inches
taller and could probably knock her out if he wanted to, she took shit from no
one and she wasn't about to let some asshole jock get the best of her.
"He don't need to mind his business! Brian don't let this nigga punk you
like dat!" Regina yelled. Lucia couldn't just stand around while her
boyfriend was getting talked to like that. Sure, if it was another boy telling him
off she would have just let him handle it, but this was a girl. He couldn't
fight a girl, but she could. She dropped her book bag as if making a
statement, but her baby face and cheery disposition wouldn't even intimidate a
kitten. Everyone turned to look at her in surprise.
"Now wait a minute. If I want to get back with him, I will. I already have
a mother Regina!" Lucia yelled. Regina had to count to ten before she could
respond. Her first reaction was to blow up and curse her out, but that
wouldn't have been wise. The two of them were on good terms and truthfully
Regina realized that it really was NOT her business. If Lucia wanted to make that
mistake then it was hers and hers only to make. She backed off.
"You know what, forget it. If you want to go back to him like some dumb
chick, go ahead. But, remember next time your kissing him, his lips were
kissing Brianna...and dat bitch sucks A LOT of dick!" Regina replied and motioned
for Brian to follow. Brian shot Anthony a puzzled gaze before leaving.
Something weird had happened when they touched and Brian knew by the questioning
stare on Anthony's face that he had felt it too. Anthony was the first to
look away and when he looked back up, Brian was already gone.
********************
"So where do you think Riley is hiding?" Tracy asked sitting down. She
was having a roast beef sub sandwich with a side order of French fries and
washing it all down with a weight gainer. No matter what she seemed to do, the
girl was destined to be perpetually thin.
"I have no clue. Me and Regina are going to his house after school. If
you think you can hold back from trying to fight him you can come too." Brian
replied as he sipped his chocolate milk. Most people hated school milk, but
Brian loved the slightly weird taste to it. Tracy smirked at Brian as she
nodded her hand and spoke in her best "Mammy the slave girl" voice.
"Oh yesa Massa! I's za promize to be'z a good gerl!" Her act made
everyone laugh as they continued to eat their lunches.
Jackson was on his way to sit down at his normal table when Anthony called
him over. They may have made up, but Jacky was in no mood to deal with him
and the rest of his crew of posers. But, they were all on good terms and he
wanted to keep it that way so begrudgingly he went over, tray in hands to see
what he wanted.
"Wat up Anthony?" Jacky asked. Anthony didn't have a reason to call him
over. He saw the way Brian was watching Jackson walk across the lunch room
and he was bothered by it. Of course in his head, Anthony rationalized this
as another way to get underneath Brian's skin, but deep down he knew it was
his jealousy that got the better of him.
"Yo man! Why don't you sit wit us today?" Anthony asked him. The usual
groupies and wannabes sat with him including Carlos and Reggie.
"Naw man, I'm gotta talk to my peeples bout some things. I'll holla at you
lada." Jacky responded and was about to head over to were Brian and the
rest of his friends were waiting when Anthony stood up. He moved over a seat
and smirked at him.
"We just want to talk about some plays for the game next week is all."
Anthony replied and Carlos and Reggie put down there sandwiches and looked
curiously at him.
"We were?" Reggie asked.
"Yeah, we need to anyway. Jacky are you gonna sit wit us or is your...boy
over there waiting for you?" Anthony responded with a knowing grin on his
face. His tone may have seemed playful to everyone else, but Jacky picked up a
hint of malice. The way Anthony said `boy' strike a cord inside of him. `
Was he talking about Brian? Does he know what happened?' Jacky asked himself
as he sat down at Anthony's table. His feelings of fear were temporarily
forgotten as they discussed ways to beat East Side High School in the big game
next week. If they won that game then they would make it to the state finals.
**********************
They heard yelling outside of Riley's apartment. It was more like a
violent argument. Curse words and the sound of various items crashing against the
walls could be heard under the background of Riley's screams. The neighbors
obviously heard, but there was no sign of anyone attempting to help. Most
of the inhabitants of Riley's apartment building were either drug users or had
other troubles with the laws so bringing attention to themselves by calling
the cops was something they weren't willing to do. It was a cold world and
why should they care about the chubby white boy with the green hair getting
beat up by his father.
Regina, Tracy and Brian stood there unsure if they should go ahead and knock
on the door as planned. Regina loved a good piece of drama like the next
girl, but the hateful words and actions that was going on inside of Riley's
small tenement apartment wasn't entertaining. Brian knew what was going on
and knew that Riley would be embarrassed if he found out that they had all
heard what his father was saying to him. Especially if he knew Tracy had heard.
Brian led Regina and Tracy away from the apartment and back outside on the
street.
"Listen guys don't say anything to Riley about...you know...okay?" Brian
asked and Regina nodded her head and for once she wasn't the one to argue.
"Wait, we can't just leave Riley in there. Did you hear all that
screaming! Hell fucking no! I'm going in there and let his punk ass fucking father
say something to me!" Tracy yelled and tried to get past Brian, but was held
back by Regina. She screamed at her to let her go, but Regina kept a firm
grip on her arm. Tracy tried in vain to break away, but she was bone thin to
Regina's heaviness and there was no contest. Again she tried and tried to
pull away until the fight was out of her. Exasperated, she stopped and fell
against Regina's arms and cried. She couldn't believe someone could be so
hateful to Riley. Sure they may have had there own set of problems, but that was
always done in jest. She thought he was one of the sweetest, nicest guys
that she knew. If it wasn't for that green hair she would have thought that
he was cute. Regina was surprised by the amount of emotion that Tracy showed
and so was Brian. He thought that they hated each other, even if he knew
about Riley's crush on her, she didn't. He wanted to make sure that Tracy was
going to be okay, but he needed to get back to Riley's to stop what was going
on. With Regina's assurance that she had things under control, he went back
inside. The yelling had only intensified with the minutes that he had left.
He steeled himself and knocked on the door. It was ignored at first so he
knocked harder and harder. It took five minutes before things quieted down
and the slamming of a bedroom door could be heard. Brian knocked again. He
heard the slow, heavy footsteps of Riley walk up to the door and stop in front
of it, making no moves to open it. He didn't want Brian to see the mess his
father had made of him. Brian knew what was going on Riley's head and
offered him words of comfort.
"Do you want to come out and talk?" He asked him and he heard Riley take a
deep breath and unlatch the door. He kept his back to Brian as he opened
the closed the door behind him. Riley limped as he walked ahead of him
towards the steps that led to the rooftop of his building. Brian followed
silently. He knew the best way to deal with Riley when he was upset was to let him
talk when he was ready. They sat down on the white gravel stones that lined
the roof top. It had rain the day before and compounded with the frigid
temperatures the roof was slicked with patches of ice. The weather yet again
was cold and snow was hinting at falling, but Riley only wore a red hooded
fleece pullover. Brian wanted to offer him his coat, it was baggy so it would
have fit, but he knew Riley wouldn't have taken it. He kept his face down so
Brian couldn't see it. They sat in silence for close to an hour. The early
winter's sky was turning a deep purplish blue color with faint lines of orange
tracing the fading sun. They gazed at it in wonder.
"Sometimes I wish I could be the sun." Riley said breaking the silence.
His voice was distant and held a sadness filled with desperation for better
days.
"Why?" Brian asked as he scooted closer to him. Riley turned his head and
gave a sad smile. Brian's first reaction was to look away, but he know that
would only make Riley feel even worse than he looked. Riley's gentle,
chubby, white face was covered in dark bruises and a deep cut under his eyebrow
where there used to be a barbell piercing was still oozing blood. His left
eye was swollen shut and day old bruises were on his cheek. Marks of deep reds
and yellowish blues lined his face. His father wasn't easy on him this
time, but he rarely ever was.
"Because when the day has been long and hard, the sun can just set. It can
go away and rise again with hopes for a better day in the morning. I don't
have those anymore..." Riley replied as he wiped away unshed tears.
"Things will get brighter for you Rye, they will." Brian said earnestly.
Riley chuckled hoarsely as he turned to Brian.
"No, they won't." He replied and they sat in silence for another hour
before going back inside. Riley hugged Brian before he left, which startled him
at first, but he returned it. Riley was never the affectionate type, but at
that moment he needed the comfort that only an embrace could give him. He
promised Brian he would be back in school in a few days after he healed a
little.
As Brian walked home he was lost in his thoughts of Riley and how he could
help him. He was so consumed with his thoughts that he didn't see where he
was going and slipped on a patch of ice, crashing into someone. As the person
was falling they latched onto Brian and brought him falling down on top of
them. It was dark outside so they couldn't see each other, but the scents were
familiar. Anthony smelled vanilla and Brian smelled a thick, expensive
musk. Strangely, Brian didn't move. He let himself get temporally lost in the
puffiness of Anthony's sweat shirt and the feeling of his strong arms around
his waist. Anthony made no move to shake him off either. He enjoyed the
feeling of Brian's small frame resting trustingly in his arms. For the briefest
of moments, he forgot where he was. A surge deep inside of sweat pants could
be felt by him and Brian, who's burgeoning fullness was expanding rapidly
too and threatening to touch Anthony`s. Their breathing became shallow as the
realization of each other's predicament was realized. Brian brought his
face up and looked into Anthony's face which was hidden by the darkness of the
streets yet he could still make out his features. His slightly pointed,
upturned nose. His thick, darkly colored eyebrows that framed his deep green
eyes. Eyes the were deeper than any evergreen found on Christmas. Eyes that no
matter how many insufferable words or unbearable actions that were done to
him, couldn't hide a deep love that he tried to suppress. Anthony knew that
Brian was studying him and he knew that he was aware that he was doing the
same. Anthony looked into the his face, although unable to make out his eyes he
knew what they looked like. Almond slanted midnight black eyes that
twinkled when he was excited. That dimmed when he was upset. That cried when he
was seven because his cat Butterball had ran away. That shined when he was ten
and Anthony had given him a cheap gumball machine plastic beetle. That
glowed each time Anthony had an adventure planned for them. Eye's that darkened
that day he had let him down and never shined for him again after that day.
That was one of Anthony's darkest days, but he had to do it. Things were
getting to confusing and he needed the space away from him to think about some
things. He never would have thought that the one time he didn't protect him
would be the ends of their friendship. The ends of the only source of
enjoyment that had filled his young life. His eyes traveled down Brian's face.
Past the silhouette of his slender dark brown cheek bones and to his mouth.
His mauve lips were thinner than average, but they curled into a nervous grin
as he pulled himself off of Anthony.
"My..My Bad." Brian mumbled as he straightened out his clothes. It was
his politeness that made him reach out and offer Anthony a hand up. He was
surprised when he took it. He had to use all of his strength to pull up the
heavy Anthony. He stumbled back and both of them laughed.
"That's cool...ahhh...yeah..." Anthony replied as he looked down at Brian.
He made no attempt to hide the fact that he was adjusting himself. Brian
glanced away nervously and did the same.
"Well, ahhh...see you tomorrow." Brian replied.
"Yeah...in English class then..." He replied with a nervous grin and began
to jog away. He was in the middle of one of his nightly jogs. Running helped
clear his mind. Brian stood and watched as he made Anthony made his way
down the street. He found himself imagining the flexing of his calf and back
muscles. He had to shake those thoughts out of his head as he continued to
clean himself off. Once reaching the end of the block, Anthony turned back and
glanced at Brian who quickly turned and began to walk away. He glanced over
his shoulder just as Anthony did and their eyes met again before they both
quickly turned away nervously. Each had a curious smiles plastered to their
faces. It was the first real smile Anthony had in months....
Copyright 2005
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