Date: Mon, 04 Jun 2001 02:58:51 From: Chip Dyp <chipdyp@hotmail.com> Subject: Judgment Error 27 The following program contains material suited for a mature audience. If you are not over 18 you should be leaving now. Of course I can't control you and neither can anyone else really. This story is entirely false except for the true parts. And now for our feature presentation. Viewer Discretion is advised... My web site is located at http://www.geocities.com/chipdyp/index.html Judgment Error 27 by: Chip Dyp (chipdyp@hotmail.com) Ian sat on the chair holding his knees to his chest crying for the better part of an hour before he heard a knock on his door. He didn't look up, preferring to ignore the intrusion. Getting no response, Mr. Reynolds knocked again a little louder before opening the door a crack. "Boys, are you decent?" "I'm the only one here, Dad," Ian whispered. He cleared his throat and tried to be strong. "David left last night." Mr. Reynolds walked into the room and looked at his only son with sympathy. "Did something happen?" "We had a fight." Ian looked away from his father as he concocted the lie in his mind. Somehow, he didn't think telling his father that he acted like a drunken whore would be for the best. "Ah. Have you tried calling him?" "Yeah. He isn't interested in talking with me right now." "Give him a little time Ian, I'm sure he'll come around." Ian looked up at his father and smiled wanly. "Thanks." "You're welcome. How about some breakfast?" "I'm not really hungry, but thanks for asking." Mr. Reynolds frowned and nodded. "All right. Make sure you eat something today though, all right?" "I will. Don't worry." Mr. Reynolds turned and left the room leaving Ian alone once more. And once the door was closed, Ian's tears began to flow once more. After another hour of crying, Ian stood up. He was all cried out. He looked around his room for a moment before walking over to his backpack. If he wasn't going to be with David, then he might as well do his homework. After four hours of solving quadratic equations and working on a Java program, Ian's tummy began to rumble. He saved his work on the program and rubbed his eyes. His stomach was still a little queasy, but he was sure that something bland would be all right. Once upstairs, Ian filled a pot with water and put it on the stove to boil. He grabbed a package of Ichiban from the cupboard and put it down on the counter. Noodles were always good. Ian looked out the window at the pool and sighed. It was covered with layer upon layer of snow. In fact, all he could see was snow. At least in December there would have been the whole Christmas thing to look forward to. Now all that remained was the cold, the snow, and the wind. And he didn't even have David to keep him warm. "Penny for your thoughts." Mrs. Reynolds said as she sidled up behind her son. "I was just thinking about how miserable it is outside." "How are you feeling?" "I'm all right," Ian said. He turned and smiled for his mom to let her know he was all right. "Noodles were always your comfort food. Even when Colin..." Mom stopped as she realised where she was going. "Even when Colin dumped me." Ian said quietly. "You guys don't have to worry. I'm not going to let myself starve." Mrs Reynolds smiled and wrapped her son up in a hug. "All right. If you want to talk about it, you know where to find me." Ian smiled and nodded. His mother retreated from the kitchen content that she had done the right thing. As he ate his noodles, he thought about David. He was so perfect; beautiful, smart and funny. Everything a guy could ever want in a boyfriend. "Why don't you call him?" Ian was startled by his Mom's sudden return. "I already did. He doesn't want to talk to me right now." Mrs. Reynolds took an orange out of the fruit bowl and sat down beside Ian. "Ah. So, what happened?" "I don't really want to talk about it Mom." "All right. I'm just gonna sit here, and eat my orange." Ian sighed and looked at his mom. "You always do this, don't you?" "Do what?" "You know what." "Nope, no idea what you're talking about. But, if you'd like to skip the whole rain dance and tell me what happened, that's all right too." Mrs. Reynolds smiled, and popped a section of the orange into her mouth. "I did something stupid, which made David mad." "What did you do?" "I'd rather not answer. It's not really relevant." Mrs. Reynolds nodded and popped another section of orange into her mouth. "But it was something major?" "Yeah." "And you apologized for doing the stupid thing?" "Yeah. But he won't accept my apology. David wants to break up with me." Mrs. Reynolds looked at Ian before eating another section of orange. She paused while she chewed and then looked up at Ian. "I don't think he really want to break up with you. I think he's just mad." "Why don't you think he wants to break up with me?" Mrs. Reynolds put her hand on Ian's and smiled. "I've seen the way he looks at you. He's in love with you." "He was in love with me." "No. He is in love with you." Mrs. Reynolds squeezed Ian's hand in support and continued. "Why don't you go over to his house? You two have a lot to talk about." "What if he doesn't want to talk?" "Then apologise and come home. Make him send you away though." "All right." Ian croaked. His mother brushed away a tear as it rolled down his cheek. "Well, I better get back to the movie or your dad will thing I'm meddling." Ian smiled weakly. "Wouldn't want that." Mrs. Reynolds smiled and walked back to her bedroom while Ian remained at the table. When he finished his noodles, Ian put the dish in the dishwasher and grabbed his coat. He had an apology to make. * * * * * * "Oh, hi Ian. Go on up. David's in his room." "Thanks, Mrs. Cameron." Ian smiled as Mrs. Cameron returned to the kitchen where, based on the smell, she was baking bread. He realised that David hadn't told his mom that he had broken up with him. Ian took his time taking off his boots and his coat. He wanted to be able to slip into his boots and coat in a hurry if David didn't want anything to do with him. He wasn't sure how long he could hold his tears. He also did not want to make a scene in the Cameron's house. They had been so nice to him. He did not want them to think less of him. Slowly, Ian crept up the stairs. He could hear David's stereo as he turned the corner. "American Psycho" by Treble Charger was playing. Taking a deep breath, Ian knocked on the door and then braced for the response. "Come in." Ian opened the door and took a couple of steps into the room. David didn't look up from his textbook until he heard Ian close the door. "Ian. I thought I..." Ian interrupted David and replied as quickly as was possible. "I know. I wanted to come apologise in person. I completely fucked up last night. I had no right to put you into the position I put you in. You did the right thing." Ian paused for a breath before he continued. "I understand that you are mad at me, but I hope that you can still love me. If you can't, I'll let you go. I won't call. I won't write. I won't visit. I'll just leave you alone, if that's what you want, but I hope that you'll still want to be friends." "Are you done?" "Yes. I'll leave now." Ian opened the door and took a step into the hallway. Just as he was about to close the door, he heard David call his name. He cautiously poked his head back into the room. "Yes?" "Do I get a chance to talk, or did you just come here to make a statement?" "No, you can talk." "Wow, I get to talk in my own bedroom. Should I feel special?" David waved off Ian as he was about to answer. "First of all, do you have any idea how you made me feel last night?" "I don't know what you mean." "Well, let me spell it out for you. The only way you'd sleep with me was if you were drunk." "That's not how it is!" "How is it? Do you think I have absolutely no respect for you? Do you think that I'd fuck someone who wasn't able to consent?" David shouted. "Evidently you did. You planned the whole thing, didn't you?" When Ian didn't reply, David continued. "Parents leave at seven, get drunk by eight so that when my boyfriend shows up, he can take advantage of my drunken state. That is what you were planning, weren't you?" Ian didn't respond. "Well, weren't you?" "Yes," Ian whispered. "So, when you were sober, you made plans to get liquored up so I could fuck you. You thought so little of me that you thought I wouldn't care if it wasn't my boyfriend I was making love to. You thought I'd be thrilled to fuck a drunk who looks like the man I love. Well, I've got a news flash for you. I love you more than that." "I..." "What. What do you think you could possibly say to explain your behaviour? I want to hear this. What the fuck do you think you could say?" "I'm sorr..." "Sorry doesn't cut it Ian. We are so far beyond sorry; you can't even see it in the rear view mirror. What you did was absolutely unforgivable." The tears rolled down his cheeks as Ian looked at his enraged boyfriend. When Ian didn't respond, David stared him right in the eyes. "You know, when you had your little panic attack, I was scared I had done something wrong. I thought I had pushed you into having sex. I didn't care back then if we did it, and I still don't care." "I just don't want to start something we can't finish," Ian whispered. "What?" "I just don't want to start something we can't finish," Ian repeated. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Ian shook his head and looked at his feet. "It's what you said to me that night when you had the others over to watch Coyote Ugly and The Broken Hearts Club." "So?" "Nothing. I'm going to go. I'll see you in school." As Ian turned to leave, David grabbed his shoulder. "What did you mean?" "What do you think I meant?" "I don't know. That's why I'm asking." Ian looked David right in the eyes. "It means that even though you may say you don't want to have sex with me, you really do." "That's bullshit." "Then why did you dance around the issue when you and Will were teasing each other? Why didn't you just come out and say that you and I hadn't had sex yet." "Because it's none of their business." "Then why didn't you say that? Why did you lead them on? Why did you make them think that you and I were going to go up to your bedroom have a night of hardcore sex? I'll tell you why. You didn't want them to know you were still a virgin. You didn't want them to know that you hadn't been able to bed me yet. Your masculinity was at stake so you lied." "Don't throw this back on me. I didn't tell you to get drunk. I didn't tell you to act like a drunken whore." "No, you didn't. You said all the right things, but you didn't mean them. They were empty words." "Is that what you really think?" "Yeah, it is. If I didn't put out, you were going to find someone who would. I kept disappointing you." Ian fell to the floor and began crying. "I didn't want to lose you. I love you so much." David stared at Ian while he continued to cry. When David didn't say anything, Ian continued. "But I have lost you, and it hurts so bad," he whispered. "You were a friend to me, and I've lost that now." David walked back to his desk and sat down. He picked up his pen and looked at his textbook. Ian watched as he began writing on the paper. Slowly, Ian pulled himself up and walked over to the door. As he touched the doorknob, he felt a hand on his shoulder. David turned Ian around and hugged him tightly. "I love you Ian." Both boys began crying as they hung onto each other tightly. When their tears stopped falling, Ian followed David to the bed and sat down beside him. "You're right you know," David whispered. "I do want to have sex with you, but I could never hurt you." "I know." "Ian, it's going to take a while before you are ready to have sex with anyone. You just aren't ready, baby." "I know. You deserve someone who can show you love, David." "I have someone who shows me love. Sex isn't the only way people can show love, you know." "Yeah." David pulled the hair from Ian's eyes, and smiled. Leaning forward, he kissed Ian gently on the lips. "David," Ian whispered. "Yes." "I love you." "I know. I love you too." "What are we going to do?" "We're going to learn from our mistakes. We're going to move forward." "Together?" David nodded. "Together. You know, even if we didn't have sex, I never would have gone looking for someone else. I love you." "That's what makes you special." "I guess. I want to make a couple new ground rules." "All right." Ian looked at David, and wiped a tear from his eye. "What's the first rule?" "No more trying to have sex for a while. You aren't suddenly going to be able to have sex. It's going to be something that takes some time." Ian nodded. "If someone asks me if we are having sex, I will tell them that it is none of their business or I will tell them the truth." "You don't have to. If you want to..." "No. Ian, I love you and I don't want to put any pressure on you. I can stay a virgin for as long as it takes. I can always masturbate." Ian frowned and looked away. David noticed and got down on the floor in front of Ian. "What's wrong?" "It's nothing." "It's something. You don't want me to masturbate?" "No! I wouldn't do that to you. I remember having to masturbate two or three times a day before Stefan..." Ian paused. "Well, before Stefan." "That's part of it, isn't it?" "What?" "That night, after I had everyone over. I masturbated that night in the bathroom. You knew, didn't you?" "Yeah. When you came back there was a wet spot on your underwear. You pressed it up against my back." Ian looked at David and continued. "I got angry at myself for not being able to please you. If I had been able to make love to you, you wouldn't have had to go to the bathroom and masturbate." "I didn't know, Ian. If I had known, I never would have done it." "I know, but it's my problem, not yours." David took Ian's hand and squeezed it gently. "You don't have to worry about that anymore. I won't masturbate again when you're sleeping over." Ian smiled, "You don't have to do that." "But I will." David stood up and pulled Ian to his feet. "Do you still want to have sleepovers occasionally?" "Yeah. I like sleeping with you. I just can't..." "I know. Ian, I can't tell you how to live your life, but I think you need to start seeing the psychiatrist again. She really seemed to be able to help you." "I know," Ian replied. "And I will. I promise." David kissed Ian on the nose and smiled. "Good." Ian looked up at David shyly. "David?" "Yes?" "Can you hold me?" David nodded. He pulled off his tee shirt and let his jeans fall to the floor. When he finished removing his clothes, he helped Ian with his tee shirt and took his hand when he stepped out of his jeans. "You're so beautiful," Ian breathed. "Not as beautiful as you," David said. He kissed Ian on the forehead and pulled back the covers. Ian rolled into the bed and watched as David closed the blinds and shut off the light. Ian felt the bed shift as David sat down on the edge. He reached out blindly, and felt David's chest as he lay down. Like magnets attracted to each other, the boys moved closer and closer until they lay in each other's arms. As David lay there, Ian's breaths tickling his chest, he smiled. This day had started out as one of the worst of his life, but now things were better. He could understand why Ian had done what he had done, even though David was still angry about it. But the anger was no longer directed solely at Ian. Now, some of the anger was directed at himself. David slowly stroked Ian's back, pausing as a shiver ran through the cool skin. "Are you all right, Ian?" "I'm all right. I just..." David shushed Ian, and stroked his back again. Ian let out a little moan and curled up just a little tighter. His muscles began to relax as David continued to stroke his back. "Everything's all right," David whispered. David held Ian tightly even after he felt him drift off. "I love you little guy," David whispered. And with that, David closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. * * * * * * "Hello, is David there?" "Oh hello, Will. He and Ian are up in his room. Did you try and call him?" Mr. Cameron asked. "Yeah, but there was no answer. I figured he might be watching TV or something." "He probably has the ringer shut off. I'll go tell him to give you a call." "Oh, it's all right. I just wanted to see if he wanted to come over and watch a movie tonight." "Well, it's almost supper time. I'll tell him to give you a call." "All right, thank you very much." "It's no problem, Will. Night." Mr. Cameron hung up the phone and smiled. In his mind, Ian and David were doing what he wished he had been doing in high school. Only in his wishes they were all blondes with big tits. "No sense in embarrassing them." Mr. Cameron said to no one in particular. He walked to the base of the stair and called for David. When he got no response, he walked up the stairs and knocked on the door and said David's name. There was no response except for an unintelligible moan. Mr. Cameron slowly opened the door and pushed it open. Lying in the bed, he could make out David holding Ian tightly. He smiled to himself as he stared in on what was a private moment between his son and the man he loved. Mr. Cameron cleared his throat and tried once more to get the boys attention. "David, Ian, it's time for supper." "What time is it?" David asked groggily. "Almost six. Will called. He wants to know if you guys are up for a movie at his place tonight." "All right, we'll be right down." Mr. Cameron smiled at the boys again and pulled the door shut to give them their privacy once more. When the door clicked close, David shook Ian's shoulder gently. Ian let out a little moan. "Baby, it's time to get up." "Huh, oh. What time is it?" "Almost six." "Mmm." "Come on, time to go eat." "All right. Can you turn on the night light?" David flipped on a dim night-light that he had acquired for when Ian slept over. He knew that his boyfriend's eyes were very sensitive - even more so when he'd just woken up. Ian groaned when the light came on and squinted. "Thanks." Ian sat up and almost jumped. He gently patted the front of his underwear and groaned. "What's wrong, babe." "I...I had a wet dream." David giggled. "Ah." He walked over to his underwear drawer and pulled out a pair of white briefs. "Here, put these on." "Thanks." Ian slipped out of the bed and pulled down his own underwear. Carefully, he wiped off all of the cum on his body before taking the clean briefs from David. "I'm so sorry, David." "Don't be." David kissed Ian on the cheek and resisted the urge to pat Ian on the bum. Ian smiled at David and hugged him tightly. "Thank you." "For what?" "For everything. For still loving me, for not hating me, and for letting me be your boyfriend." "But not for the underwear?" Ian laughed. "Nah, not for the underwear." He kissed David on the nose and smiled. "I love you, Ian. I especially love you in tightie whities, but I guess you should put some pants on." "Pervert." "Only if loving you makes me a pervert." As the boys dressed they both thought about all the mistakes they had made and vowed they would not repeat them. They loved each other. Nothing could stop that, they thought. Continued.