Date: Thu, 28 Mar 2013 14:02:04 -0700
From: kuragari 129 <kuragari129@hotmail.com>
Subject: Life's Expectations - Ch. 18

	Lets get this over with now: I own "Life's Expectations" and every
character in the story. There are some events that have actually happened
to me, but all the characters are fictional. If it is illegal for you to to
view this in your location, then GTFO. You're probably gonna ignore that so
have fun. Boy on boy happens in this story so if your not a fan of that,
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	Sorry for the long wait for last chapter. It's spring break here,
so I have more hours at work >.> Although my mind is mostly to blame for
it. Stupid writer's block and stuff.

	Last chapter Nick got uncomfortable at the dance and ended up going
to Lucas' for the night. Not long after they arrived they had a grand old
time just to be found at the end by Lucas' little brother, age 11, Blake.

	This chapter is them getting out of that situation and a little bit
of Zach and Shane. And a new adult character will be added! SHE will be
rather important to almost all four boys, in one way or another.

	Now on with the show!! With a little love for MJ in the title XD.

	Chapter 18 – Hold My Hand


	Lucas' POV

	Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!! How did I not notice Blake
enter my room!? I always notice cause I've rigged my door to set off some
bells like a store. I mean it's failed me at the beginning but now it works
perfectly!

	I can't even read his expression that's how scared I am right
now. "Blake, What are you doing down here!?" I had to hide mine and Nick's
naked bodies but Nick up and fell asleep on me. Now I gotta talk to my
brother in the most awkward way possible.

	"Well I came down here to remind you Mom's gonna be in town this
weekend... But you were preoccupied..." Oh god he saw!! "What were you
doing?"

	"Blake remember when dad said he doesn't want a gay guy touching
us?" Blake nods. "Well, I basically did what he doesn't want them to
do... to Nick..."

	"So your gay?" My face must look like a fireplace right now.

	"No, Blake. I'm not!"

	"But you said that you did what dad doesn't want..."

	"I know what I said! It's complicated." Oh god how do you explain
sexuality to your 11 year old brother? "There are different kinds of people
who refer different things. Have you had the sex class in school yet?"

	"They mentioned something about down there changing soon. Why?"

	"Okay... That's called puberty and a lot more than 'down there' is
gonna change. When you get older your gonna get sexually active in some
way." This is soooooo very awkward, you have no idea! "So you'll find girls
cute and 'it' will grow harder at times."

	Blake started to bite his lip. That's what he does instead of
blushing... he bites his lip. "Oh... okay cool."

	"Blake what's up?"

	"Nothing."

	"Your biting your lip something is bugging you about what I just
said, spit it out."

	"'It' is... um ya. What you said... right now." WHAT!? My brother
has a boner right now!? Well I guess at 11 anyone could get turned on by
what we did but seriously!? "And girls are yucky."

	"Why are girls 'yucky'?"

	"They have Cooties!" Of course they do Blake... Of course they do.

	"Blake you have to promise me you wont tell dad, Rita or Riley what
you saw okay? Brother's code."

	"What about mom?"

	"Not mom either."

	"Got it. But you have more explaining to do mister!" Blake ran up
the stairs and out of my room. Good god that was a close one!

	After that I moved myself toward my pillow just enough to get my
head on it. Nick didn't even wake up the entire time. I even poked him in
the cheek, nothin'. Then I fell asleep in the best position I've been in in
a long time. With Nick laying on my chest and my arms around him.

	Besides Blake walking in, tonight has been a great night.


	Zach's POV – Saturday morning

	The dance was lost of fun. It was my first ever school dance and I
had a blast. Kyle even let me do the music for it for a bit. Shane was
dancing with almost every person in the gym. Well every girl at least.

	When it was over we brought everything for the tech club back to
the theater and were on our way. It didn't take that long to put stuff away
and get a little thank you from John. By the time we were done it was
almost midnight. Shane got picked up by Scott and went home.

	That didn't stop us from texting each other though. I barely got
into my front door before my phone went off.

	Shane – I feel bad about Nick.

	Me – Ya, I hope he's okay

	Shane – He's a trooper, he'll be fine. I'll talk to him on
Monday.

	Not even joking, Shane always does proper English stuff in
texting. He doesn't even say things like 'LOL' or 'BRB'. Nothing of that
sorts. He gets mad at me when I do it though.

	Me – So wuts the plan for the weekend??

	Shane – What** and I have an appointment.

	Me - Wut kind of appointment??

	Shane – WHAT**!! It's not a 'u' and it has an 'h'. Seriously. I
have a appointment with the psychologist.

	Me – We have one of those in town??

	Shane – No she comes into town every other weekend. I've been
seeing her monthly since grade 7.

	Me – Oh, i see

	Shane – I** seriously you need auto correct on your phone.

	Me – No i dont im fine

	Shane – Dear god, help me! Anyways I was wondering if you wanna,
maybe, come with me to my appointment. It's only an hour, it's at 10am
though.

	Me – Well im off to bed

	Shane – What! No answer!?

	Me – If i have to be ready for an appointment at 10am i gotta
get to bed now.

	Shane – Oh... that makes sense. I'll pick you up at 9:30. You'll
get to meet my brother, Noah!

	Me – Night!

	Before I even got his text I was asleep dreaming of him and me
going on another another date.


	Shane wasn't lying when he said he was gonna be here at 9:30. I
think I heard my doorbell at 9:30 exactly. Not to mention a Shane entering
my room moments later. "Come on lazy, lets go!"

	"It's called tired not lazy."

	"Same thing, now get going!"

	"I still need to brush my hair!"

	"You look fine like that! Come on lets go!"

	Against my will I was pulled out of my home by Shane with my mop of
hair flowing as it felt. Now this wouldn't have been a big deal to me if
one: I wasn't going into public and 2: Noah is in the fucking car!!

	Shane's big brother is in the car and is gonna see my messy hair!
Shane was right when he described his brother. Exactly like him just older,
and no glasses. This is like Shane's overly protective brother I'm meeting!
What is he gonna think of me!?

	"Hey, I'm Noah, Shane must have pulled you out while you were still
getting ready." I had barely gotten into the car and he was talking to me
like he knew me. What has Shane told him.

	"Zach, nice to finally meet you. Shane has told me enough to write
a book about you two."

	"I could say the same for you two." Noah seams really nice. I also
have only heard two sentences come out of his mouth. I just hope I don't
get on his bad side.

	The ride was mostly Shane talking about stuff me and him have
done. I think it's the most talkative I've seen him ever. He kept bouncing
and shouting.  It wasn't that long though until we got to the place where
his appointment is.

	The moment the car stopped Shane went quiet. He was the last one
out of the car and took his sweet time to get inside. Even with the 10
degree weather outside.

	Shane though went up the stairs all by himself, Noah held be
back. "He gets really talkative during the ride and then becomes silent
till like halfway through the appointment."

	"Oh..." Well that's kinda odd don't ya think? "Is their anything I
can do?"

	"Well if he wants to snuggle up, like he usually does, just let
him." Noah protects his little brother more than he protects himself it
seams, "Oh and I'm gonna take this time to tell you one thing."

	There's the line I was waiting for. "I'm not gonna hurt Shane I
swear!"

	"Good, or you'd be in a world of hurt. Shane is the only person I
got left. I hate to see him like this." Noah actually had a really sad look
in his eyes. "Has he ever told you why he comes for these appointments?"

	Noah started walking up the stairs, I fallowed, "I assumed it was
because of his nightmares. Other than that he didn't say why."

	"That's exactly why. I'm guessing he hasn't told you what they were
about."

	"Actually last weekend he told a group of us."

	"Really!? I was told only a year ago. When the whole Lucas thing
happened. Not even Dr. Bear knows what happens yet."

	"Dr. Bear? Like Lucas Bear?"

	"Yep. Anyways we should get in the office before Shane freaks out."
Great now I'm going to see Lucas' mom with Shane. How can this get anymore
awkward? Wait I take that back, cause I know it still can get worse.

	The wait in the waiting room my have felt like forever for
Shane. He was leaning into me the entire time twirling his thumbs around in
circles. He even tried to apologize for pulling me out before I brushed my
hair. I said it was fine and then asked if there was anything I could
do. To which he replied nothing. Literally nothing at all, he remained
silent.

	It was actually about 10 when a lady walked through the doors
saying, "Shane Hearing?" Shane got up pulling me up with him. When we
reached the lady she had a skeptical look. "And who is this?"

	"He's Zach." Not to my surprise it was Noah who answered.

	"If he's not family he'll have to wait here." Shane grabbed
tighter, it kinda hurt to be honest.

	"I think having Zach join the session is a good idea." the voice
came from behind the nurse, who moved out of the way instantly. "Hello
again Shane how are you?"

	THIS is Lucas' mom!? I'm gay and I can tell she's a MILF!! She has
Lucas' blonde hair in a bun, his blue eyes. Not to mention the body of a 20
year old! Like if I was straight I would all over her, if I was older.

	"But ma'am it's against..."

	"Report me if you will, but I believe it will help with Shane's
progress. Come on you three." Well I guess that settles that? I just kinda
fallowed Noah and Dr. Bear.

	The room was very welcoming. No desk, just a coffee table, a couch
and a love seat. A couple of bookshelves covered one wall and anther was
almost entirely windows to a garden. It is a rather nice looking room. I
sat down at one end of the couch, Shane snuggled up just like out in the
waiting room.

	"So I guess I'll start how we have always started: When was the
last time you had your nightmare?" She gets to business quickly.

	"About 2 weeks ago. When I slept over at Zach's place." Shane had a
huge blush on his face when he said that.

	"Am I right to assume that you two are a couple?"

	"Uhhh, I don't know actually. We've went on a date and have hung
out allot, but neither one of us has asked to be boyfriends."

	"I see, so you two are not sexually active then?" That got a cough
out of me. I mean what kind of question is that!?

	After I calmed down I answered, "The most we've ever done is
snuggle in our underwear." and then I blushed.

	"Well I see. So what happened the night you got the nightmare?"
Shane explained it rather lightly. So I went into more detail. Like what we
did, who we met up with, why he slept over and my point of view of how he
ended up in my bed. It only took me like 10 minutes to explain it all.

	Dr. Bear then looked over previous reports, probably about the
other times he's had the nightmares. Shane lanced his fingers with mine
when she looked. I really couldn't do much. It felt like she was taking her
time looking through the notes. She even separated them into piles.

	Noah was the one to break the silence. "So do you have any idea on
why it continues to happen?"

	"I actually have several." Well that's good news. "If you have
noticed I have ever incident that happened the day of a nightmare filled
night in piles. The first pile is all the nightmare reports before you
started coming to me. The second the ones that involved Noah. Third, Scott
and Paula. Fourth, while being alone. And fifth, with friends."

	"And what are your ideas?"

	"Well every incident has one of two,and sometimes both, center
points. With friends and Scott and Paula you had them at the beginning of
sleeping in the new house or the first few times sleeping at a
friends. Involving Noah, it's usually when an older man gets angry at one
of you two. Alone, it seams to be a mixture of the two points and the
previous ones all match up aswell."

	"So then what causes my nightmares?" Finally Shane's getting back
to being himself.

	"Well if you ask me, you have trust issues and you react to
similarities of the two situations." Wait didn't Noah say she doesn't know
what happens in his nightmares? "It seams when your getting to know
someone, let it be Lucas or Zach here, they need to prove that they deserve
your trust. The nightmares seam to act as a reminder for you. When you see
someone getting as aggressive as your father was you react negatively as
well."

	"Ma'am I haven't been completely honest." Shane didn't even look at
her when he said it. His head was 'hiding' in my chest.

	"What do you mean Shane?"

	"I wasn't honest when I told you what the nightmares were about. Or
about the people Noah defended me from." She waited, not saying
anything. She didn't seam surprised by the whole ordeal either. Shane went
on to explain that all 'men' Noah argued with were talking about 'who raped
him'. The men were actually school bullies and were actually talking about
who could have made him turn gay.

	"I see, what about the nightmare then Shane?" This took the rest of
his time. He actually went into detail about everything. Like more than he
did at Gage's. Like how his dad started with making him play with his dick
in front of him, at age 9! How that turned into his dad fingering him
almost anytime they were home alone.

	Then he stopped mid sentence, "I was 10 when he..." Everyone who
was paying attention, and who wasn't, knew what he ment. "It was just after
his birthday. He said it would be his birthday gift from me. Saying the
watch Noah paid for wasn't from me.

	"It was on my 11th birthday that Noah came home early from his
friends and found him raping me. I was gagged and handcuffed to the bed
because I wouldn't co-operate." As he went on he started to cry more and
more, until he burst into tears, crying into my chest. I started to rub his
back, noticing on my watch we finished 12 minutes ago.

	"I didn't enter the room." Noah continued the story. "I was worried
that I would make things worse for him. So I called 911, asked for the
police to come silently and I would let them in. They did as I asked." He
then stopped like Shane did.

	"I'm sorry Noah, but I need you to finish the story." There was a
knock at the door. All Dr. Bear did was push a button and went back to
looking at Noah. "Please continue, Noah."

	Noah took a deep breath, "When the police got there I let them in
and led them to my brother's room.  Moans and groans could still be heard
from inside. One of the cops slowly opened the door, gun in hand. While
another had his gun in ready. When they opened the door and did the whole
'Hands up' thing. My heart nearly jumped out of my chest.

	"Shane was not only gagged and handcuffed, but had several bruises
on his body. The worse on his face, around his left eye. To make maters
worse when he fell of the bed from the surprise, I could hear Shane scream
through his gag."  Noah was visibly shaking and on the verge of tears.

	"Okay I think that's enough for today." Dr. Bear cleaned up her
notes and took out her appointment book. "I am moving appointments around
so I can meet with you THREE next Saturday for a double. I believe that if
Shane can get into talking like he usually does, then I can get to the
bottom of his nightmares for next month's session. Does this sound good to
you three?"

	Of course we all agreed. The appointment was made for next Saturday
at the same time. She explained that nothing was effected negatively other
than her break times. After all that was done and Shane and Noah were
looking better we went out to the waiting room, where we saw Lucas, Nick
and some other kid.

	"Oh, hey Shane, I didn't realize today was your session." Lucas had
sympathy in his voice. I think it went unnoticed by the other two. "Oh Zach
this is my little brother Blake."

	"Hey there." Blake waved back, biting his lip. "What are you guys
up to?"

	"Waiting for my mom. We're going out for lunch at Pizza Hut. What
are you guys gonna do now?"

	"I'm going to take Shane and Noah out for ice cream at DQ." Shane
started to open his mouth to argue, "And there is no arguments! It's free
ice cream."

	"Fine, then can I get a large blizzard?"

	"You could get two large blizzards if you could eat that much."

	"Noah can! My stomach gets sore as I get half way through the
second."

	"That settles it! To DQ!!" I gotta get the mood up in here. Ice
cream has always done it for me. It should get Shane and Noah's mood up
too. Lets hope I'm right.


	Gage's POV

	After the dance I pretty much went right to sleep. Now I'm out
hanging with Sam just walking around talkin'. "The dance was pretty fun,
eh?"

	"Ya we sold almost all of our glow stick inventory. We're gonna
have to get more before Halloween dance." Sam kicks a stone down the
sidewalk. That's usually does that when he wants to talk about
something. "Have you heard from Nick today?"

	"Ya he's going to lunch with Lucas and his family. He should be
home for dinner."

	"Okay, ummm... about Nick..." As we reached the rock again he
kicked it, "You know how you and Nick have bonding time..."

	Oh I get what he's talking about. Me and Nick getting dirty. "Ya...
I guess you'd want me to stop that huh?"

	"No I wanted to tell you I'm okay with it. I get it, your sexually
active and I'm not so much. I don't mind if you keep doing it with
Nick. Only Nick though, no one else."

	"Just wondering, but what cause you to think of this?"

	"Well last night Nick was upset cause he keeps holding in his
feelings and he exploded. So I didn't want to hold in how I felt about
something important like this. That and I wasn't sure what you would be
doing so."

	"Don't worry I think I set myself up with even tighter rules than
you did. But thanks for letting me know."

	"You're gonna pound your brother tonight aren't you?"

	"If he's up for it. I mean Lucas had a raging hard on when we got
to my house last night."

	"Really I didn't notice."

	"Ya he kept fixing himself. I found it amusing he finds Nick
attractive."

	"Maybe he'll get Nick out of his shell."

	"Maybe..." If anyone can it's one of his friends, if not all of
them. "Hey lets go to Timmies! I want a hot chocolate!"

	"You always want a hot chocolate... fine lets go."

	"Yes! Don't worry I'll get you something if you want." I love days
like this that we just hang out. They are even better now that we are a
couple. Sam is exactly what I love about him. He is himself... that sounds
kinda weird... oh well.


	Chapter end.

	Okay so There is Lucas' mom, Dr. Iris Bear. We also got a little
bit of Noah... but you basically knew how he would act. She will be
important in at least 2 of the 4 boys stories, maybe 3.

	Next chapter will be out as soon as I can get it out. If you have
any ideas or comments about the story so far that you wanna share with me
you have two options. One is to email me at kuragari129@hotmail.com, the
other is to go to the fan page on facebook and send me a message.
http://www.facebook.com/LifesExpectations Don't forget to like the page
while your there!

	P.S. I do live in Canada and I love Tim Horton's hot chocolates! To
bad its becoming summer time... Well at least I like their smoothies too.