Date: Sun, 19 Oct 2003 07:32:10 -0700 From: dude sweet <dudesweet (at) hotmail (dot) com> Subject: Like We Used To I was waiting after school for my dad to pick me up, so I could use my permit and practice driving. I saw Kyle sitting down and came close to him. I'm in 11th and he's in 10th, so we don't have any classes together. He was a friend of mine in middle school. Before he sees me, I hear he's humming Circle of Life from the Lion King. I sit next to him and make a lions roar. He looks up and smiles. "Hi Evan." "Hi Kyle. What's up?" "Nothing." "I'm waiting for my dad. I have my permit now. I get to drive!" I brag. "Cool dude." "Have you seen that new DVD for the Lion King? I here there's a new song." "How did you know I liked the Lion King?" he asks, puzzled. "Kyle, duh, you were humming it when I came up. Besides, I remember it used to be your favorite movie." "Yeah." "So have you heard of the new DVD?" I ask again. "Yeah. I got it." He's a Disney freak; he's got everything Disney. "Is it cool? Cooler than the video?" I ask, because I have the video from when I was a kid. "Yeah. Want to see it? Want to come over sometime?" "Yeah. Is there anytime your brother's not there," I ask carefully. A few years ago, his brother walked in when Kyle and I were jacking off together and threatened to tell everyone we were gay. He never did tell, but we stopped hanging with each other; I guess because it freaked us both out then. "Not really," he says bummed. "Want to come over to my house? And we can watch videos, like we used to?" "Yeah. Ok. Cool. You still got a pool?" "Hell yeah. I swim everyday dude." "Even now." "Yeah, it's heated." So we trade phone numbers because we had forgotten each others because it had been so long since we hung out. My dad comes, and I feel cool when Kyle sees me driving with my dad! I call him and invite him over Friday for Lion King and a sleepover. In high school, kids don't have sleepovers like we did in middle school, but I was hoping he would say yes. He did! I cleaned up my room; my dad had a heart attack. On Friday, after school, my dad picked us up. I wasn't allowed to drive with Kyle in the car, so I didn't get to show off. After we got to my house, he saw the pool and said, "Can we swim first?" I wanted to skinny dip, like I usually do; but was afraid to ask him. See, I am gay. Nobody knows it except my best friend. Even though he used to skinny dip with me a few years ago, we always wear suits now because I'm gay and he's straight. But it doesn't really matter, because he's still my best friend. So we changed in my room. Kyle turned his back, so all I got to see was his butt; but I did notice he had hair under his arms like me. We swam a while, jacuzzi'ed a while, swam some more, then went in to change for dinner. Once again, all I saw was his butt when we changed. After dinner, we laid down in the living room to watch the video. Yeah, I know it's for kids, but we enjoyed it and had a good time. After the movie, I get brave and ask, "Want to Jacuzzi again? Like we used to?" He gives a big smile. "You mean naked?" I nod. "Sure. Like we used to." He looks around for my dad. "It's cool," I assure him. As we start to undress he asks, "We get naked here and just leave it here?" "Yeah. Unless you want to wear your boxers and strip outside." "That sounds better." So we both go out in our boxers. I turn on the bubbles, pull off my boxers, exposing my semi, and hop into the Jacuzzi. He strips and gets in so fast that I don't really get a good look. He gets that smile again. "Can we blow the jets? Like we used to?" He means point them on our dicks to get boners and get horny. I grin. Big. "Yeah, sure." Good, I think this means he'll jack with me. "I bet mine is bigger than yours." Well when he was in 7th and I was in 8th mine was bigger. His is probably bigger than mine, but I accept his challenge. "No way," I say. He looks around. "Ready?" Oh, yeah, I'm way more than ready. I nod. He stands up and sits on the side. He pulls it away from his body, pointing it straight up. My eyes pop out of my head. It's huge. "Six and a half," he announces. I stare. "Let's see yours." I hop up next to him, showing off my 5.5 inches proudly. "You grew a lot," I tell him. "Hehe. Yeah." I guess I'm staring too much, because he says, "You like it?" Hmmmm. What to say? The truth? `I'm gay and I love your dick.' No, too risky. "Well, it's way bigger than mine." Ok, that's neutral. And even true. "Yeah, not like it used to be," he says. "It grew a lot," I say, stupidly stating the obvious. "Yeah." We just sit there, our boners exposed. Finally we get cold and wrap our towels and go inside. We pull on boxers, but nothing else. We lie around and talk and finally turn off the light. In the semi dark room, we continue to talk; this time about more sexual topics. "You done anything yet? With a girl?" "No," I reply. "You?" "No." Silence. "You got a girlfriend?" "No." "Me neither." The tension in the room starts to rise. But it's good tension. I think. "You got a boner?" "Yes. You?" "Yeah." "Want to jack off together? Like we used to?" "Ok." He seems relieved. It's not that light in the room, but I can see he's going for it. Plus I can hear him. The sight and sounds of him jacking push me to come in less than a minute. I let myself make good noises, so he can tell I came. Then with nothing else to do, I roll on my side and watch him as best as I can in the dark. He takes longer; about three or four more minutes, then also makes a lot of noise when he comes. After he stops breathing heavy, he says, "What you got to clean up with?" Yeah. I forgot about that. "How about we go to the bathroom? We can clean up there." We got up, holding our spermy dicks in our hand. It's nice when I turn on the bathroom light. He is covered all over with sperm. "You did some serious shooting. That's a lot." "Yeah, I was horny." After cleaning up, taking as long as possible, we head back to our sleeping bags. "You still jack off with your friends?" he asks casually. "No. Do you?" "No. They all think it's too gay." "Yeah." No, not `yeah it's too gay, "Yeah that's what my friends think too." "You think its ok?" he asks. "Yeah, sure why not. We're not hurting anybody or anything." "Yeah, besides it's fun," he adds. "Yeah," I agree, excited that I might have a jacking friend once again. After a long silence, he turns to face me, his face inches from mine. He asks quietly, "You ever kiss anybody?" I turn to face him. Uh, maybe I even have MORE than just a jacking friend? "No," I admit truthfully. "Would you ever?" "Yeah. If it was somebody I liked." Silence. "Like you." There, I said it. "Ok, close your eyes," he whispers. I do. Softly, his lips touch mine. I feel a bolt of electricity power surging through my body. I have never kissed before, but I know to open my mouth a little. Slowly I stick my tongue out to meet his. ANOTHER power surge zaps me all the way down to my toes. He pulls away. I open my eyes. He's looking at me. "That was nice." No, it was more than nice it was great. It was a monumental moment in my life. It was my first truly gay experience. "Close your eye," I ask him. He does. I kiss him this time. It still has the same electricity charge. At this moment I want to be inside of him, I want him to be inside of me. I now realize the point of fucking. I had only thought of it in the abstract before, never quite understanding the point. Now I think I understand. Now I want to become part of him, have him become part of me. I also know that I am not going to fuck; my dad has indoctrinated me good. It's dangerous. I need to wait till I'm 18. I'm not ready. Oh, but I am ready. I am ready now. With Kyle. I am so ready. After we break, he wraps his arms around me and we pull as close to each other as possible. We hold on to each other all night. Hanging on for friendship. Hanging on for love. Hanging on for life.