Date: Tue, 17 Oct 2000 06:19:10 CEST
From: a a <vhere@hotmail.com>
Subject: love is worth all the risks 1

LEGAL STUFF

This story is a work of fiction involving teenage boys. All The usual rules
apply. If you shouldn't be reading this now then don't continue on! If you
do, don't get caught!

This story is copyright by (c)vhere who retains all rights. If you want to
use it, in any way, send me a mail, I'm sure we will find an agreement.


ABOUT THE STORY

I ask for your leniency because I have mitigating circumstances:
1- This is my first attempt to wright a story.
2- I am french, so my english is far from perfect (if you mail me you will
understand what I mean in my answer!)

So try to be kind and positive in your criticisms!!
Send them to vhere@hotmail.com


SPECIAL THANKS

It's my pleasure to thank Christian who helped me so much in the writing of
the story. Without him and his talented bilinguism "Love is worth all the
risks" should have remained a project for a long time.

He has been a scrupulous proofreader and a very helpfull teacher. I don't
know how to pay him back all the time he spent on my work!!

I owe him my first publication. I'll never forget it.


And now the show can go on!


LOVE IS WORTH ALL THE RISKS

Chapter one: the day I met him.

It looked like a nice day. In spite of my black curtains, the sun was
beginning to fill my room. A stupid piece of tissue was not going to block
it from doing its job. It slid over my desk, lightened the computer, the
ultimate rampart before the pillow on which my head was still resting. The
warm light grazed my cheek, stroking it so gently that it made me moan and
smile.

Half-asleep, half-awake, this is the best time of the day. It's the moment
you can try to manage your dream, to give it the orientation you wish. You
have to do it carefully: thinking too much break the residual sleepiness. I
started to imagine a simple picture made of sand. I let it fill my mind,
invade my dreamland. Then I made somebody emerge from the water, too far
away to be seen precisely. By the time he got near me, I could see his nice
figure. I recognized him, my dreamboy, my virtual lover. Far from real, he
was some sort of 3D puzzle made of pieces of the male anatomy I collected
in my memory as examples of the best there was: the legs of Ryan (a really
good jogger), the washboard belly with a light six-pack from Ted (brown
belt judoka), Brian's round slightly bulging pecs with medium sized pink
nipples from Brian (swim team). He also had the perfect shoulders of Greg
(football team), the neck of...

"Don't think too much or you will wake yourself up, and it's not the
moment, he is going to kiss you right on the lips..."

DDDDRRRRIIIIG

Why does that stupid alarm clock always ring at the crucial moment? It
seems like it's malevolently waiting, lurking there to ruin the best of
your dream. I am absolutely an opponent of death penalty for everybody,
except perhaps the one guy who invented the alarm clock. I am sure it has
been a woman 's job.

I left my bed and hurried to the bathroom for my ritual morning piss. I put
my bathrobe and walked to the kitchen to eat my breakfast before
showering. My mum was cooking some scrambled eggs. Cooking? It would be
more honest to say she was burning them, as always on the first day of
school. Every year she wants the first school day to be memorable, to be an
event, so she prepares the breakfast for the whole family. Since she does
breakfast only once a year, she's far from an expert. The memorable event
is that we have our worst breakfast on the first day of school.

"Hi honey, how are you?"

"Hi mum, fine really, not like the eggs!"

"Ohhhhhh, why didn't you say it before? Poor eggs, they are inedible. What
are we going to eat now? I am so sorry Matthew honey (that's my name,
excuse me I forgot to introduce myself) will you forgive me?"

"Of course I'll, as every year. Always remember that I love you for who you
are not for your eggs, or better, in spite of your eggs!"

"Don't be so cruel for your mum and give her a peck!" She said smiling,
giving me some cereals.

"Happy to return to school?"

"Yea, quite happy because it's the last year before going to college. I am
in a hurry to be there, on my own, free at least, no longer considered as a
kid."

"Such in a hurry to leave us" replied my mum, looking a little bit hurt by
what I had just said.

"No mum, don't misunderstand what I said, I love you all, you know it, and
I need you, but I also need more freedom. I don't care being a kid at home,
if it's not too often, but I can't bear anymore to be considered like a kid
at school."

"Hi mum, hi bro!"

"Hi Lucia!" I said. She is my sister, 16, just a year younger than me and
pretty hot if you are interested in her style.

"How are you sis? Good dreams?"

"Oh yea, I dreamed about two more weeks before school. The dream has been
cool but wakening has been shit!"

"Lucia please!"

"Oh sorry mum, to awake this morning has been awful; and you?"

"About the same but no dream at all!" How could I explain to them the one I
had?

"Hi family" said my father in a very sleepy tone.

A triple "Hi!" was returned.

"Oh, special 'first day of school' eggs, I bet!!"

"Don't tease me that way and give me some more coffee or I'll be depressed
all day long. How are you going to school? Do you want one of us driving
you there?"

"No thanks, I'm going walking, it'll give me some more time to get
accustomed to the idea of returning school."

"Good idea" said Lucia. "May I go with you?"

"Of course, you know that."

"Yes, and I know it's a way for you to be closer to Cathy. Yesterday she
told me how excited she was to go back to school, and I think she is more
excited to see again a teenage male I know very well."

"What did you plan in my back? Are you going to try to commit me with some
stupid bit...?"

"Matthew, stop it!"

"Hum, with some hysteric Barbie girl, unable to use more than three words:
IIIIII, HAOW and UUUM."

The piece of bread thrown by Lucia missed my head by two inches as I
escaped from the kitchen. Back in my room I undressed and rushed into the
shower. I was still smiling from what I had just said to Lucia. I like to
tease her as much as she does. Sometimes it's a little bit rude and mum or
dad tries to stop us. Sometimes one of us sulks during a day or two, but
it's never longer. When I was younger I would have preferred to have a
brother. At ten, playing with a girl is not what you want, but all has
changed. Now we have a very good relation, we talk a lot and we share most
of our secrets (except for my biggest). I really love her and I think she
does too.

After the shower I dressed, not really dressed up, but I tried to look my
best. Who knows? Maybe I'll cross the path of some new kid I could
impress!!

Not sure, I am not so impressive. Judge by yourself: 5'11", 140 pounds,
blond mid long hair and blue eyes. They are not the piercing ones, just
ordinary blue. I have high cheekbones and a straight nose. It's the only
straight thing of mine, except for an other part in some circumstances I'll
perhaps speak about a little later! I have no chest hair, a few on my legs
and a good bush at the right place! Not so bad, not to turn away, but no
more to turn around.

Down the stairs Lucia whistled:

"Waooo! It looks like you are going to a party, Cathy is going to be crazy,
especially if she thinks you did it for her."

"Stop teasing me please Lucia!! And don't give Cathy impossible hopes. I
like her enough to try not to disappoint her!"

"OK, OK bro, I stop. Shall we go now?"

"OK! Bye dad! Bye mum! And thanks for the breakfast, it'll remain in the
family history!!"

"Oh, run away before I get mad at you, naughty boy, and have a good day!"

Outside the sun was already warm and the light was sweet. I like morning
light. It's like fresh water painting. It makes things and people younger,
not like the aggressive light of sunny afternoons, in which nothing can
stay in the closet, even the worst ones.

"Hum, Matt, I don't want to tease you anymore, but why do you always push
Cathy away? She is really beautiful, she is smart, gentle. You seem to
appreciate her company. You know she has a crush on you for so long and,
finally, you are free, as far as I know. What's wrong with her?"

"Nothing's wrong with her, Lucia, she is just not my type."

"And how is your type? Or better, who is she? You have somebody in your
mind, haven't you?"

"Hum!"

"I knew it!! Who is she? Do I know her? Is she in our school? You can't
hide such a big thing to your only sister. I promise I won't repeat it, it
will stay secret, I swear!"

"Don't be dumb, there is nobody, and I don't think there will be anybody
before a long time. I am not into this for the moment.  Perhaps, one day,
I'll cross the road of the one I need. When the time comes, I promise
you'll be the first one to know it."

"I am not really convinced. I think I'll investigate a little bit."

"You should take care of your own love life. How is Eric?

"I am sure, this year, he will be mine. He fooled around with some other
girls last year, but it was just for training, to be ready for me."

"You are incredible!" I said laughing. "By the way, such a faith will
probably be rewarded. You'll have him this year, I agree with you. If I can
help, just tell me."

"Thank you."

"Hello Lucia and Matt!" said Cathy, joining us as we were still half a mile
from school.

She kissed Lucia, then me. Her kiss was, as usual, a little longer and
wetter than it should have been.

"May I introduce you my cousin Taylor? He just moved to the neighborhood
last week. He is going to share our school."

I thought my jaw would hit the sidewalk. Just in front of me, no more than
two yards away, was one of the nicest creature I had ever seen: about 5'10"
and probably no more than 140 pounds, with short blond hair and large light
green eyes to swallow your soul. His skin was very pale and thin, and
smooth. I wanted so much to kiss him right now! Why are girls allowed to
kiss, even people they hardly know, and not the boys? It's too unfair!

When I took his hand I shivered! I kept it, unable to let it go, as if we
were glued to one another. He shook his hand a little bit more in an effort
to recover his freedom, so I let his hand go, blushing.

"And what's your name?"

What a sweet voice. It sang to my ears. I am sure I could spend hours just
listening to it! Tomorrow, I have to take a tape recorder and just steal as
much of this voice as possible and then listen to it until I fall asleep
and slide into wonderland.

"And what's your name?"

"Oh hum... Sorry, hum... I'm Matthew, but call me Matt as everybody
does. It's nice to meet you. Excuse me, I am not fully awake, a bit slow
this morning." I stammered, till blushing.

OMG, I am making a fool of myself in front of that guy, I thought!

"In what grade are you?" asked Taylor

"You are in the same grade", said Cathy. "Perhaps you will have classes
together. It would be great for you to be introduced by Matt, he knows like
everyone at school."

"You are a popular guy?" He said, grinning.

"No, not really, not like our football stars. I know everybody because I
never moved. I know most of them since we were five or six. I saw the
others move in and our school is not so big: less than a thousand
students. It's not a big deal to know almost everyone."

"Don't be too modest, you are quite popular, not as a star, but everybody
knows you because you are smart and cute and everyone feels like being your
friend because you are the kindest of the smart cute guys. You are so kind
I am sure you never hurt anyone, or, at least, never wanted to do so!" said
Cathy, whispering the last sentence.

I blushed furiously, not knowing how to react to such a declaration. I just
turned to Cathy:

"Thanks for the compliment, even if it's not really deserved."

Then, turning to Taylor I said:

"Don't believe her too much. What she said proves I have at least one good
friend, and a good friend is never a good judge."

He smiled and we all resumed our walk to the school. We chatted about the
last days of the break, what we did, where we went, who we saw, all that
stuff you know, not really interesting, just socializing.

I was absolutely fascinated by Taylor, his figure, his face, his voice, his
laugh, his smile, his moves... I was trying desperately to concentrate
myself on the conversation's topics but it was really hard to keep contact
with the real world, being so close to an angel!

That day must have been blessed by the Gods (yes plural, because I think
that, in order to be that generous, they have to be more than one): I
discovered our schedules were the same except for French and PE classes. At
first it sucked a bit to be in separate groups in PE, but when I realized
how it would have been difficult to keep control in the locker rooms or in
the showers, I was quite relieved.

On the way to our first class (History), I introduced him to most of the
people we crossed, trying each time to make the connection easier for him
by showing common topics with the others. Thank God I realized that I had
memorized quite well our previous conversation. It was as if I knew him for
ages: to Tim I introduced him as a football player, to Dorothy as a movie
maniac, to Ben as a jogger, to Andy as a SF reader...

In the class he sat next to me. After a few silent seconds, staring at me:

"Perhaps you are not the popular guy, but it looks like everybody is
popular to you. You know them so well! I am going to think that Cathy was
right. Do it that way a few more years and you'll be choosing the furniture
for the White House!"

I laughed and blushed one more time. Mrs. Salinger coming in at that very
moment, I had a good reason to stay silent.

"Good morning class", she said, sitting at the desk. She was a little
woman, quite nice, as far as I am a good judge in woman beauty, in her
early thirties. I knew her for being my teacher two years ago.  I liked
her, she was a very good teacher, succeeding in making history thrilling
for almost everybody, whatever the topic of the year.  She smiled at all of
us and stared at Taylor.

"Oh, here is the new pupil. Welcome Taylor! I hope you like history! Do
you?"

"Yes Ma'am, I do."

"So it's OK, I am sure we will be good friends. Anyway, this year I am a
bit lazy. I am not in the mood to work, so I decided it's your turn."

She put 2 little bags on the desk.

"In the left bag I have all your names, written on small papers. In the
right one I have as many topics as you are. Each one will have to prepare
an oral report to do, in front of the whole class, at my desk every Monday
morning, so I can have a longer weekend.  I don't want to be cruel, so the
first one will not be next Monday but in three weeks. To be absolutely
fair, only fate will decide who will work about which topic and
when. Taylor, would you come here? As you are new, I'll pretend your hand
is innocent, I know enough the others to be sure their's are not. Take a
paper and tell us what the first topic is."

Taylor took a paper and read:

"The struggle for liberty up to Independence Day."

"Hum, nice subject to begin the year. Taylor, take a paper in the other bag
and tell us who is the lucky first."

The class was as silent as a forest can be in the seconds before an
earthquake, neither a whisper nor a breath could be heard.  Taylor unfolded
the paper and gave it to Mrs. Salinger.

"And the winner is... Matthew!"

"OMG" I said to myself, just three weeks to do that work.

Taylor came back five minutes later. When he sat down he whispered to me:

"Sorry for putting you in first place."

"Don't worry, it has always been that way, each time fate is called to
choose someone for a boring chore, I am certain the task will be mine. It's
perhaps the reason for me to be popular."

He giggled, smiling to me. What a smile! A smile like that every morning
and I am sure to be the happiest man on earth for at least 100 years.

The day went on uneventfully. Taylor and I went from class to class, always
together. We chatted a lot and I continued to introduce him to as many
people as possible.

On our way back to home we were still together. I was walking very slowly
to delay the separation. When we stopped in front of his house we continued
talking a few minutes, then I held my hand out to him.  I didn't want to
part from him but, at the same time, I wanted so much to touch him that I
was in a hurry to shake hands with him. He took my hand and stared at me.

"Thank you to have been so friendly with me today. That is my first day at
school here and it's like I have been there for ages."

He was still holding my hand.

"At least 25 people told me goodbye, more than in my old school after five
years."

Still keeping my hand.

"And I owe you that. I don't know how I'll pay you back!"

I knew how he could but I was not sure it should have been a good idea to
tell him right now!

Still hand in hand.

"Thanks a lot." he said.

"I don't know how it is to move in a new place with new people, but I think
it makes you feel lonely. So I just wanted to welcome you. It has been my
pleasure, you are so... so..."

Ohhhh, what was I about to say? Calm down Matt! Take it slow, you need a
cold shower, or, better, an icy one! I stuttered and resumed: "So easy to
connect with. Everybody will like you or already likes you."

Don't go too far! Don't break the dream! If he understands what you mean,
he will reject you, he will run away! Keep control, correct what you have
just said and quickly...! My mind was running as fast as possible. "I saw
two or three girls that seemed very interested", I added quickly.

He didn't react, he just said:

"I hope I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"Of course! And what if I picked you up just here at a quarter past seven?"

"It would be great."

"So, see you tomorrow."

"Yes, see you tomorrow! May... may I have my hand back?" He asked grinning.

"Oh, of course! Excuse me! I was not paying attention, excuse me!" I was
blushing furiously.

"No problem dude, no problem, see you..."

He turned back and entered his house.

Walking up the sidewalk to my house, I was on cloud nine. Ten times, I was
about to put my right hand in my pocket or to take the braces of my
backpack. Ten times, I stopped. I didn't want to erase the softness of his
touch in my palm. I wanted to keep his warmth: it was like if I could
almost smell his so precious light perfume.

I wanted to jump, to laugh. I am sure I was grinning wider than I ever
did. The very few people I crossed looked at me suspiciously. I didn't
care. I didn't even notice. I was so happy. I had just met the most
incredible boy in the world; we spent a whole day together and he thinks he
owes me something. I was the one who owed him the most wonderful happiness
I ever felt. I was so happy, so happy...

I was not really thinking, I was just feeling this amazing moment, letting
it fill me.

"Matt!"

Nothing was important just now, we spent all the day together and he wanted
to meet me again.

"Matt!!"

I would have been able to go back and stay in front of his house until the
morning.

"Matt!!!"

I almost fell on the ground when someone caught my arm and stopped me
suddenly.

-------------------------------
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