Date: Mon, 02 Feb 2004 19:04:43 -0800
From: dude sweet <dudesweet (at) hotmail (dot) com>
Subject: Math Tutoring

I hate math.  Well, I don't exactly hate it; it just drives me crazy.  Ok,
so what you ask?  Well the problem is I have to get all A's and B's at
school.  Well, at least, according to my mom and dad.  My dad says it's so I
can get into a good college.  You see, I want to be a writer someday.  Well
I'm a writer now, here on Nifty, but I want to be a real writer someday.
Like in real books.  So I have been working real hard to get a B- this year.
  Our semester grades just came out and I did get all A's and B's; but after
working very hard, I only got a C in algebra.  Bummer.

My dad has been helping me, but he's no math whiz either.  I have been doing
all my homework and studying real hard, but it's not been enough. My mom
suggests we `have a talk' with Mr. Anderson, my algebra teacher.  Yuk.  I
hate it when teachers and parents are in the same room.

After the torture of the meeting, which I will leave out the details because
I don't want to relive it, they decide I should have an algebra tutor.  We
don't have tons of extra money, but my parents want to find a way to get
enough for a tutor.  Mr. Anderson suggests we use a peer tutor.  That's
basically just a smart kid at school to help me with my homework and stuff.
They cost way less than a real tutor.  So they all agree to try it.  I guess
I agreed to it too; but I didn't really have a choice.

Well, I'm a junior in high school and have waited this long to take algebra
because I've never really been good at math.  In our class there are all
ages of kids from freshman to seniors.  Darren is going to be my peer tutor.
  Well at least he's not in my class.

I go into the library after school where we agreed to meet and look around.
Since I don't know what he looks like, it's kind of hard to find him.  So I
just sit down and get out my math stuff and start my homework.  By `start my
homework' I mean open the book to the right page and put my name and stuff
on the paper and write down the first problem.  Then I just sit there.

After a few minutes someone comes over.  "Eric?"

"Yeah.  You Darren?"

"Yeah."  He sits down.  He's way shorter than me, with a pimply face, spiky
hair and a dorky sounding squeaky voice.  He looks at what I'm doing.  "So,
you need help getting started?"

"Yeah."  So he explains the lesson.  Even though he looks like a dork, and
his voice sounds like a dork, he's a good explainer.  I mean, I actually
almost understood the lesson.  Maybe it was because I heard it once and
class, and now a second time or maybe he was just better than Mr. Anderson.
Anyway, I got my homework done in less than 45 minutes.  It usually takes an
hour to an hour and a half at home with my mom or dad helping.

Over the next two weeks I learn a little about Darren.  He's a freshman in
Mr. Anderson's honor algebra class.  He's also in drama and choir.  After he
learns I am a writer he bugs me to give him some of my stories, so I give
him the first part of Mowing, which I wrote for an assignment in Creative
Writing class at school.  He said he liked it; he acted like he liked it; so
maybe he actually liked it. I didn't share any of my Nifty stories with him.
  I'm still in the closet at school.

I have a big chapter test coming up, so I arrange for him to come over to my
house on Sunday.  My parents will pay him for this lesson since it's not
part of the peer tutoring. On Saturday, my mom goes on the warpath.

"Eric, your room is a mess.  And it smells bad."  She looks at my dirty
clothes piled up on the floor.  She opens my closet and looks at the
disaster area there.

"You haven't brought down clothes for me to wash in weeks. I want every
thing, and I mean everything, down in the washroom now. You find every sock,
in the closet, under the bed, every pair of boxers, every t-shirt, every
everything you own, and get it down into the laundry room now!"  She storms
out.

I sniff.  Well, it is a little smelly.  Dirty clothes that are in a pile
tend to get smelly.  Especially since I been wearing stuff more than one or
two days.  Ok, maybe it does stink.  I gather it all up.  I find tons of
stuff under my bed. In between my bed and the wall are a couple of boxers I
thought I had lost.  By the time I have everything in a pile, I realize I
have a LOT of dirty clothes.  It takes me two trips to haul them into the
laundry room.  My mom is sorting as I bring the second pile down.

She grabs the shirt I'm wearing and sniffs it.  How embarrassing.  "How many
days you been wearing this?"

Three days.  "I don't know," I say.

"Everything.  Take it all off and go take a shower."

As I start to undress in the laundry room she goes on to say, "Then you can
clean your room.  I don't mean organize, I mean clean.  Vacuum, 409, the
works. I don't want your friend coming over tomorrow to your filthy room."
Well, he's not my friend, he's my peer tutor.  By then, I'm down to my
boxers.  I'm not taking them off in front of my mom.  I have some pride.

I go into the bathroom and shower.  I hear the door open and close, but
didn't see anybody come in. As I'm drying off, I realize my mom grabbed my
boxers.  I wrap my towel around me and head into my room.  My mom has put
the vacuum cleaner, 409 and paper towels and a big trash bag.  But as I look
around, I realize I have no clothes to wear.  They are all in the laundry
room.

I go down to the laundry room to retrieve some clothes.  "Want are you
doing?" my mom asks.

"I need some clothes."

"Well you should have thought of that 3 weeks ago when you stopped bringing
down your dirty clothes.  Your not wearing any of this stuff until it's
cleaned.  You can get something of your dad's.  Go any clean your room now!"

Something of my dads?  Yeah right.  He's like 3 times bigger than me.  I
decide to just wear my towel.  After all, all I'm going to be doing is
cleaning my room. My parents never come in my room when the door's shut.
Not since a few years ago when my mom opened my door and caught me jacking
off.  Now she knocks until I answer.  So does my dad.

My towel keeps falling off when I get down to pick up trash and stuff, so I
just leave it off.  I can put it on if anyone knocks; but they probably
won't even do that.  After I get all the trash into the trash bag (way more
than I thought), I start to vacuum.  Now I don't know if you've ever
vacuumed naked before, up until then I never had, but it gave me an idea to
take off the brush thing and let it vacuum me, to suck my dick. Well by the
time, I get the brush thing off and position myself to put the pole thing on
my dick, I have a boner.

Well my boner is too fat to put in the pole, but the hose looks like it's
bigger.  So I pull the pole off the hose and prepare to put the hose on my
boner.  It's not that great of a feeling or anything, but it was fun to try.

As I assemble the vacuum back together my door opens.  In walks Darren.
What he sees is me naked, with a boner, sitting on the floor, putting the
vacuum cleaner back together.  Then he sees me have a heart attack and freak
out.

"Fuck!" I let slip from my lips as I grab my towel.  I can't wrap it and
tuck it in, because my boner is in the way.  He just stands there, with a
goofy smile on his face.  I turn away, hold up my boner and manage to get
the towel around me and tucked in.  I turn around.  He's still looking at
me.

"What are you doing?" I demand to know.

"I came to help you study. Saturday, 10:00.  Your mom let me in and pointed
me to your room."

"Well you should have knocked."

"Yeah, I can see that now.  You don't need to freak out Eric; I've seen tons
of dicks before.  Even boners."  What?  Tons of boners?

"Our thing was tomorrow.  Sunday."

"No it was today."  Well he is still smiling, on the border of laughing, but
not crossing over.  I am still totally embarrassed of course. "My mom is
washing all my clothes."

"Hey, whatever man.  You don't need to freak out.  It doesn't bother me."
What was that thing about seeing tons of dicks?

I go into the closet and pull on some dress pants.  As I walk out into the
light, I realize my boner is very visibly poking a tent.  I put the towel
over.

"Eric, quit freaking out.  I don't care about your boner.  I get them all
the time too. I even have one now."  He pulls up his shirt and grabs his
bulge.  Well, it's a lot different; he's got boxers and shorts, I was naked,
and now only have pants on, commando style with no underwear.

Why does he have a boner?  From seeing me?  Or just because?

I go back into the closet and get a dress shirt and put it one, leaving the
shirt untucked to hide my boner, which refuses to go away. Stupid dick.

"Wait here."  I go out into the dining room and grab a chair and haul it
back to my room.  I set it up near my desk chair for Darren.  As we study,
even though my boner goes down a little, I keep thinking about the `tons of
dicks' he says he saw.

"Dude, you're distracted, you're not paying attention.  Are you still mad
about me not knocking?  I'm sorry.  Ok?"

"Yeah, it's ok."  I guess.

"So what's the problem?"

"When you said you'd seen tons of dicks, what did you mean?  Nobody takes
showers in PE.  Do they in your PE class?"

"No.  I never seen anybody take a shower in PE.  I saw tons of them at camp
the last few years."

"You took naked showers at camp?" I ask.

"No. I mean yes, we took naked showers, but in stalls, like at home."

"So when?"

"Well, it's a little embarrassing to talk about," he says.

"More embarrassing than having someone walk into your room when you're
naked.  And hard?"

He looks at me and smiles.  "No, not more embarrassing than that."

"So tell me."

"Ok.  I will tell you after we finish.  Ok?"

"Ok."  I guess.  I was still distracted, but when he gave me a practice
test, I did pretty well on it.  So I don't want to seem like a dork and
bring up the `tons of dicks' thing again.

"So did you ever do moon-o-grams at camp?  Did you go to camp?" he asks.

"Yeah, I used to go to camp all the time.  I never heard of a moongram."

"Ok Eric, you know what mooning someone is?"

"Yeah, of course.  When you show your bare ass."

"Yeah.  Well we started doing that.  And when a bunch of guys do it, we used
to call it a moon-o-gram.  Like once, when the counselor was just coming
into our cabin.  We all lined up and mooned him when he opened the door."

"Your whole cabin?"  I ask.

"Yeah, ten naked butts.  It was hilarious."

"What did he do?  Your counsellor?"

"Laughed."

"So you saw tons of dicks when you guys were mooning people?"

"Not really."

"So..."

"Well the moon-o-grams started after 6th grade.  When we were at camp after
7th grade, we got a little more daring and a lot more perverted.  We
invented sun-o-grams."

He stops to see if I understand.  I give him a look showing I don't have any
idea.

"Well think about a moon.  Now turn it around and we called that a sun."

I think for a minute.  "So a sun is when you show your dick to someone?"

"Not exactly.  A sun would be when you surprise some one when their not
expecting it and suddenly they see your dick."

"Ok."

"And a sun-o-gram is when a couple of guys surprise someone by showing their
dicks."

"And you guys did that?  Ran around surprising guys and showing your dicks"
We never did that at my camp.

"Yeah.  I told you it was perverted."

"And you didn't get in trouble."

"No.  Counsellors just laughed.  Other campers would try to get revenge and
moon or sun us.  So by the end of the summer we had all pretty much seen
everybody else's dicks."

"And boners?" I ask.

"Usually not during sunnings." Oh.  Then when?  But I didn't ask.

"Wild," I say.

"Yeah, we were crazy. Maybe you should write a story about it.  I could send
it to all my camp friends.  I have their emails.  Most of them."

"You want me to write a story about your moons and suns?"  Sounds like a
good Nifty story to me.

"Well not if it's too perverted.  I just thought it would be cool.  Never
mind.  Forget it."

Well I didn't forget it.  I got a C+ on my test.  I also wrote a short story
about mooning and sunning for Darren.  You see, I was hoping maybe he might
like it and maybe, just maybe, jackoff with me or something like my friends
and I used to do in middle school.

In the library, during tutoring a few days later, I brought it up.  "I wrote
that story.  About your summer camp."

"No way!  Did you really?"

"Yeah."

"Dude, let me have it.  Is it ok if I email it to the guys from camp?"

"Yeah sure."  Good, he likes the idea of it.

He holds out his hand.  "Dude, I didn't bring it to school.  No way."

"Oh yeah. Duh.  So can I come over?  After school tomorrow?  We can do the
tutoring thing at your house."

"Ok."

We walk to my house together next day after school. We go to my and I shut
the door, just in case anything good happens.  Before we start homework he
says, "Show me your story.  Please."

I open the file on the computer for him to read. I trade chairs with him so
he can read it.  I watch him reading.  He is smiling in all the right
places.  He finally finishes.

"Man you are a good writer." I was a little worried.  I mean I put some
stuff about jacking off and things like that in the story.  I wasn't sure he
would like it.

"So did you like it?" I ask.

"No."  Shit.  "I loved it.  You are a great writer.  Wait, I already said
that."  We laugh.  "Can we have something to drink before we start
homework?"

"Sure."  I leave and get us some Mountain Dew Code Red. When I come back in
the room, he's not in the room.  "Darren..." I call out.

"Help.  I got stuck in the closet."  Stuck in the closet?  First, what was
he doing in my closet? Second, how do you get stuck in a closet?  I pull
open the door.

"Fuck!"  He standing in my closet, with his pants down, shirt pulled up and
boner sticking right out.

"Surprise!" he yells. Hell yes, I was surprised.

He pulls up his boxers and shorts and comes out in the room.  "Man...the look
on your face was hilarious."

"I was surprised," I explain.

"Yeah.  That's the whole point of a sunning."  I replay the moment in my
head.  I was so surprised I really forgot to study his dick. Damn.

Believe it or not we do homework.  When he leaves to pee, I quickly shut the
door and get ready to do my own sunning. I pull down my shorts and boxers
and pull up my shirt.  I also have a boner.  He opens the door to my room.
"Surprise!"

He comes in and quickly shuts the door.  I put mine away.  "Dude, yours is
huge," he says.  It's not huge.  Only 5.75 inches.

"Well yours looked pretty big too," I offer, even though I didn't really get
to see it long enough to judge.

"Want to..." He stops.

"Compare?" I finish.

"Yeah?"

"Ok."

We stand close to each other.  He pulls his down and out pops his boner.  I
pull mine down as I'm looking at his.  I have way more hair.  His looks
bigger, mine looks fatter. After looking at each others for a minute, we
both pull up our pants.

"Ok, see you tomorrow," he says as he gets his stuff together. I jack off
that night thinking about our time together.

Next day, during tutoring he asks, "Want to sleep over?  On Friday?"

"Sure."  I hope we can do more sunning stuff. We make the arrangements.

The day drags on forever until finally the final bell rings and we head out
to his house. After messing around on his PS2 and eating dinner, we watch a
DVD of Spy Kids in 3D.  He even has the 3D glasses.  It's cool.  When the
end of the movie comes, I get my courage up and ask him what I have been
wondering about for the last few days.

"Darren."

"Yeah."

"You remember when you first told me about moonings and sunnings at camp."

"Yeah."

"Well you also said you saw lots of boners.  But you also said it wasn't
during the sunnings.  So I was just wondering, when did you see boners?"

He thinks for a minute.  "Well did you go to summer camp Eric?"

"Yeah."

"Didn't you see some boners?"

"Yeah."

"Ok.  I bet we pretty much did the same thing as you guys did."

"Ok."

"What did you guys do?" he asks.

Uh, oh.  My turn.  "Compared."

"Yeah.  Anything else?" he asks.

"Yeah."

"What."

"You know."

"Yeah probally.  I just wanted to hear from you."

I take a breath.  "Ok.  Sometimes we jacked off together.  Sometimes we even
jacked each other off."

"Shit!"

"Did you guys do that?" I ask because he seemed surprised.

"Well, we jacked together.  But we never jacked each other."

"Oh," I say.

"Sounds like it might have been fun."

Damn right it was fun.  "Yeah."

We are both a little embarrassed at that point and drop the subject.  Later
when it's bed time I ask, "Where we going to sleep?"

"Well, we could sleep in my room.  Or we could sleep in the living room.
But I've got a cool idea.  We could set up the tent in the living room and
pretend we are at summer camp."

"Pretend we are at summer camp?  You mean..." I ask, just to make sure I
understood him.

"Yeah, only if you want to."

"Ok.  Or we can skip the tent and still do the summer camp thing in your
room."  This gets a big smile from him.

"Ok."

We had a blast!