Date: Tue, 3 Jan 2012 01:32:20 -0500
From: Jesse Jesse <gmmac1987@hotmail.com>
Subject: Matthew, My Love Epilogue

Hey guys. I apologize for the lengthy pause between the last chapter and
this final epiloge, but holiday stuff's been keeping me busy. I want to
sincerely thank you all for all the wonderful, kind comments and notes
you've sent in. I hope you've all enjoyed reading this story as much as
I've enjoyed writing it. Hope to start a new project soon. Thanks for all
the love and support,

Jesse

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				 Epilogue


	Summer in Appalachia is a beautiful time. Though we have our fair
share of heat, it's not the blistering heat of the "deep south." If we top
a day of 90, we're thinking we've "set the woods afire." But especially
since I'm an evening kind of guy, the balmy evenings of the summer are my
favorite time. How I loved those evenings spent on the front porch of our
house, or snuggling in the hammock Matthew had came carrying home one
evening, sheepishly smiling. The sun seems to linger in the sky until the
last possible moment, almost fighting to disappear behind the mountain
ridges in the evenings. The night sounds of the mountains, though sometimes
frightening to the newcomer, are a soothing melody to the inhabitants of
the ancient slopes. Late evenings and nights are filled with the hoots of
owls and the yelp of the coyote and fox. Mid-July to early August brings
the "ch-ch-ch" sound of the cicada, known to the mountain people as
"katydid." These were the happiest hours Matthew and I had spent together
in such a long time. Yet even in this peaceful, blissful time, I couldn't
help but feel a bit suspicious. There was definitely something going
on. Like clockwork, every other work day Matthew would smile mysteriously,
dress, and leave. Each time I made an effort to question him about where he
was going, he'd simply kiss me and reply vaguely, "I'll tell you when the
time's right." Frustrating as this was, there were other matters weighing
on my mind. Try as I might to not think of the future, I couldn't help but
give a tiny amount of room to the dread of knowing that in a matter of
weeks we'd be parting for college. We'd already sorted the plans of
returning on the weekends to our home together, he was headed ETSU while I
completed my first two years at the community college, to spend all the
time together possible, but I knew it wouldn't be the same. Though I tried
my hardest never to show Matthew my worry and the heartache that I already
felt, he knew. He seemed to sense it from the moment I stepped into a
room. Finally one evening he searched my face with his most piercing gaze
and began to question. "Alex, babe, what's wrong? You've been quite all
evening, hardly said two words. What's going on?" I tried to laugh. "It's
nothing serious. You'd laugh or roll your eyes if I told you." "Then what
it is? If it bothers you, it's gonna bother me too. What's wrong?" I stared
intently at his worried face. Did I dare tell him? Knowing Matthew the way
I did, I was afraid that if he found out I dreaded our separating that
much, he'd never leave, and then what?

	"It's just that I've been thinking ahead, you know, a few weeks
down the road." But to my surprise, he didn't respond with solemnity or
even a guilty expression, but grinned. His face went from worry to a rather
sheepish, guilty grin. "Alex there's something I need to tell you. I'm not
exactly sure how you're going to take this, because I've been keeping a
secret from you, but please hear me out before you go crazy on me." "Okay,
I'm listening, though I'm not so sure about this whole 'secrets' thing."
"Well, now just hold on. I've been thinking about these same things for a
while now, but hadn't said anything, 'cause I didn't want to get your hopes
up. Now, remember me telling you once that I had an uncle who was a
welder?" "Yes, but what's that go to do with anything?" "Well, it's got
plenty. See, Uncle Tony taught me how to use a stick and mig welder when I
was just about ten years old. I just had a kid's interest in what my uncle
was doing then, but as I got older I realized that I actually was pretty
good at it. Well, I saw uncle Tony a few months back, before you and I were
even back together, you know, when I was expecting Scarlett." Though he
tried to go on, there was that momentary pause when I saw the pain still
lingering in a corner of his heart. "Anyway, Uncle Tony told me that that
new big industrial truck manufacturing plant 'Altec' had a program for
getting welding certification. Well, I knew with Scarlett on the way that
I'd not be going to ETSU and I'd need some kind of income, so I started
going to classes at the plant. That's where I've been going." My stomach
fell. "Oh Matthew! You mean you're not going to ETSU? That's been your
dream, your plan since I've known you. Matthew, please, don't do this just
because of me. With a better education, you'll have a better job. I don't
want you spending your life in some dirty factory!" "Alex, do you know how
much a certified welder makes? Have you ever heard? A certified welder can
make $40-50 an hour, as much as $60 in bigger towns and cities! And even
with money aside, I like it. I enjoy doing something with my hands. You
know me. Can you honestly see me working behind some desk the rest of my
life?" "Yes, but Matthew, what about ETSU? You talked about that
relentlessly before! I don't want you to lose your dream, just to satisfy
me!" There was a long pause as Matthew stared into some distant place or
thought that I couldn't see, and when he did speak, his voice was low and
serious. "Alex sometimes our dreams can change. A year ago I would've never
believed that I would have decided not to go to ETSU. Honestly, yes, it was
my dream school. But life changes, Alex. Things don't always work out the
way we plan, and especially not the way we want. Look at what I'd planned
for my life with Scarlett. Even before my little girl was born, I'd already
planned our life, and I certainly wasn't expecting to lose her. And look at
us. Just look at what one year has brought to our lives! Look at what pain
we both endured, endured because of losing each other. Alex, I said it once
before, and I'll say it again. I've lost the two most important people to
me in the world once. I may not be able to bring Scarlett back, but I'll be
damned if I'll lose you again! You are my world now. Losing someone so
important in life has a way of shuffling your priorities. You realize going
to a certain college, just because of the name, isn't so important any
more. It's the people in your life that are important, it's you!" "I just
want you to be happy. I don't want you to do this just for me, only to
realize a few years down the road that you're not happy." A small smile
crossed his face as he brought me close to his warm body. "Believe it or
not, Mr. Duncan, not everything is about you! I've made my choice for
myself." The sly tone in his voice made me smile. "Oh really? So the fact
that we're not going to be separated after all isn't for my benefit at
all?" "No, it's for mine!"

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	Ten years! Ten years since that fateful day when my life had
changed forever. Had someone told me all those years ago that one day I'd
be living with the man of my dreams and fantasies, I would have laughed and
told them they were insane, yet here we were. Looking back over those ten
years, there were aspects of our life together that had changed, and still
there were some things that were just as they'd always been. Though our
faces shown men that were quickly approaching thirty, Matthew still wore
his boyish grin as he locked gazes with me, my own heart still fluttering
just as it did that first time we kissed. Eventually earning a masters
degree, and working on a doctorate, I'd wound up teaching at the high
school I'd hated all those years ago. It was amazing at how a few years
experience in life can change one's perspective so. Once the place of my
loathing and own self-belittling, "Principal Duncan" now spent my days
encouraging students to hone their skills and knowledge for their own
confidence and self-betterment. Matthew was ever the same, coming home each
day with a dirty face and his clothes greasy from spending the day working
with his chosen tools of trade. Not much had changed in our little hollow
of the mountains, including the evenings we spent enjoying each other.
Though my treatment and therapy had been successful, I still made special
efforts to give him "those looks" to let him, not only hear me say, but see
how I loved him. And always his answer was the same, the brilliant smile, a
tender kiss, and .............. "I know. I love you too!"