Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2012 23:21:46 -0500
From: Cy-kun <cysanonymouslyanonymousemail@gmail.com>
Subject: Oh Radio Tell Me Everything You Know Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Sex: This story has it, again, eventually. And it's between
boys. If that bothers you, or you don't like stories that don't jump into
the sex right away, then this probably isn't for you. Copyrighted material:
Again, this story has it. I don't own the copyrights, I don't pretend to,
and this is free so I can't get sued anyway. True stories: This is not
based on one.

Introduction: First of all, thanks to everyone who's still reading the
story. There were way more than I expected after that long wait and I'm
really grateful. You guys have way more patients than me, lol. Second, Ohio
is WAY better than New York. Just saying. And not just because we don't get
hit with ridiculous hurricanes that somehow completely bypass Florida
either. Third, the two weeks between chapters thing is still going on, but
the next one might be short so there's a tiny possibility of some
earliness. Fourth, um, ok I ran out at three. Fifth, enjoy the chapter!

	-Cy

------------------------------------------------


	"Wow!" Owen grinned at me. "We get our own deck!"

	I let the door close behind me and followed him into the room. It
closed with a loud 'click' that for once didn't sound all that ominous,
even though part of me thought it probably should have. I guess not even my
nerves can stand against the power of seeing Owen this happy.

	"Yeah, it's nice," I said as I put my bag on the bed.

	Well, one of the beds anyway. There were two but Owen already put
his stuff on this bed too and after spending about an hour in the car and
the lobby (and the elevator and the hallway to the room) trying to decide
if sleeping in separate beds would be insulting or good cover I went with
insulting. I was even a bit surprised that not hurting Owen's feelings won
out over the slight terror I had of sleeping alone in a room with him.

	Not that the way this was supposed to happen would have been any
better. Actually it would have been a lot worse since we were SUPPOSED to
be sleeping in the same bed with Cheryl's dad in the other bed, while
Cheryl and Aunt Karen got a room to themselves. When I rode my bike over to
Cheryl's this morning though, her mom told us that her dad got called away
on a last minute business trip and since they already had the rooms booked
anyway and she didn't feel comfortable with Cheryl staying in a room alone
with us -that crap again- "us boys" could have one all to ourselves and
wouldn't that just be fun?

	Which is the problem, really. Defining 'fun'. Fun as in
no-parents-around-staying-up-late-and-eating-junk-food-at-three-in-the-morning,
or fun as in no-parents-around-let's-get-naked-and-see-what-fits-where? One
of them seems a lot less fun than the other. And I really hate that I still
can't decide which one.

	The sound of the balcony door closing as Owen came back in from
outside made me jump a bit and realize that I'd been staring blankly at the
bed for who the hell knows how long. I shook off my thoughts before Owen
noticed anything was wrong.

	"That deck is awesome!" Owen said excitedly. "You can see the whole
beach from our room. This is the best hotel I've ever been in. Easy."

	He smiled at me and I couldn't help smiling back.

	"Yeah," I said. "It's really cool. I come here with Cheryl's family
every year and they always get a room on the second floor so we get a
deck."

	"You're lucky," he said. "The only place me and mom ever go is to
visit is my grandma in Cleveland. It seriously sucks up there."

	He made a face, one that was supposed to be disgusted but ended up
being kinda cute, and I giggled. "Turtle Beach is way better than
Cleveland. Even if the only thing to do is be on a beach with a lot of
people."

	Now it was my turn to make a face.

	"Yeah, true. But you're here with me and Cheryl so it's not like
you'll be on your own. Which wouldn't be my favorite thing either really,"
he chuckled and reached for my hand.

	And like a skittish idiot deer I jerked away.

	Owen frowned and I wanted to punch myself. He just wanted to hold
your hand, retard, not do...something else. And I was almost feeling
relaxed there too.

	"Sorry," I mumbled and let my hair fall in front of my rapidly
reddening face.

	  "What's wrong?" he asked softly. He didn't waste any time in
brushing my hair back either and I blushed even more when his fingers
lightly brushed against my cheek.

	"I-" I swallowed. "I'm not-I mean I'm....nervous? I guess?"

	I glanced up from the very uninteresting carpet I was staring hard
at in time to see him frown. "About what? Going to the beach?"

	"N-no, not t-that," I blushed even HARDER and how the hell is that
even possible? Ugh. "It's, um, I just, I mean it's....you know," I gestured
around the room. "this."

	He cocked his head. "The....walls?"

	I sighed. "No, the room. Um, the room with just...us."

	My face practically caught fire as understanding dawned on his
face. "Oh! I get it. But, you know I'd never, you know, pressure you or
anything-"

	"I know!" I cut him off. "I-I know," I said again, softly this
time. "It's...it's not really even you, I think? I just feel pressured
anyway since we're alone and-"

	"You don't need to. I don't want you to do anything you don't wanna
do, we don't even have to do what we did last time-"

	"No! I mean, I l-liked that..." I trailed off and glanced
away. "But, I'm trying to-the problem isn't that I don't wanna do something
I don't wanna do it's I don't know WHAT I wanna do...or, you know, not and
that...I dunno." I shrugged awkwardly.

	I looked back at Owen. He was looking right back, but he didn't
look confused or annoyed or impatient he was just, waiting, calmly. I could
actually look right into his eyes while I was trying to explain one of the
most embarrassing things I've ever had to explain, and feel reassured. Like
I didn't need to feel ashamed no matter what I did or didn't say.

	How can I not be hopelessly in love with someone like that?

	 "I'm just scared," I said quietly. "That what I might want to do
is more than I'm ready for. And I don't wanna, I dunno, force myself, just
because I'm never gonna get a better chance."

	It took me saying it to actually realize just why this was
bothering me so much. After what me and Owen did the last time, I wanted to
do it again. And thoughts of doing....other things were getting a little
less embarrassing and more....let's just go with less embarrassing. But
even if I did wanna do...more, where could we? In my room with no lock and
my parents right downstairs or in Owen's room with a mom who knows we're
together right downstairs? Yeah, not the best atmosphere for love.....God I
can't believe I just thought that.

	But alone in a hotel room, on vacation, with a great view of the
beach right outside? That's, like, the definition of a perfect
opportunity. Not just to do things, but for it to be romantic and not
rushed and uncomfortable. Well, more uncomfortable than it'd be anyway
and-ok, not going there.

	"You don't need to be scared about anything," Owen said and took my
hand. I gripped it hard this time, instead of jerking away. "And please,
don't force yourself to do anything. Yeah it's perfect and I AM excited
about being in a hotel room just with you, but I swear it's just because I
want to be able to just, you know, BE with you. And not have to worry about
who's watching or who might find out."

	He smiled, then shrugged. "Ok, maybe I was thinking about the other
stuff a LITTLE, especially what we did at my house. But we don't need to do
anything until we're both ready. And I don't care how long that is." His
smile turned a little self conscious, but somehow warmer at the same
time. "I'd wait forever for you."

	Something inside of me eased at that. Not that I ever really
thought Owen would pressure me, but it made me stop pressuring myself. At
least a bit. I relaxed my grip on his hand and I'm not sure who moved first
but somehow we ended up in a loose hug, his arms around my waist and mine
around his neck with my head on his shoulder buried in his neck. He smelled
like, well like Aunt Karen's leather car seats and shampoo actually, but it
was still comforting. So comforting that I was barely even hyper-aware of
how every inch of our bodies were pretty much pressed together. It was more
than nice to be able to just enjoy Owen after two weeks of talking on the
phone and sneaking smiles when we managed to see each other at school.

	"That tickles," he said.

	"Mmm, what?" I asked.

	"You're breathing right on my neck," he giggled and squirmed a
little.

	"Sorry," I said. "Um, don't move though?"

	"Why not?"

	I was so glad I was still blushing from before because I got to
pretend my face wasn't getting any redder. "Um, I'm, uh...you smell nice."

	"You're smelling me?" he asked after a second.

	I nodded, then realized he probably couldn't see it what with my
head being in his neck and all. "Yes?"

	Owen's body shook and for a second I thought maybe he was
shuddering in disgust, but then I realized he was laughing.

	"I can't smell good after four hours in a car," he said, but made
no move to get away.

	I took a deep breath and grinned to myself when it made Owen squirm
again. "You smell great," I said. Not even gonna mention what that did to
my face.

	"I smell like car," he protested.

	"You smell like you," I said.

	"And car-"

	I cut him off with a kiss.

	I know! No one's more surprised than me, trust me.

	He went totally still for a few seconds, so maybe he was actually
more surprised than me, but then he started kissing me back. He took over
the kiss right away, but that was ok. I kind of really liked when he did
that. And even if I didn't, I was too happy that I actually managed to kiss
him first to care.

	I don't know how long we stood there kissing but we went from hard
lip kisses to wide open mouth tongue wrestling that I'll probably be
embarrassed about later to soft, quick little kisses while I clung to
him. After one of those last kisses we stopped and I rested my forehead
against his. I sighed happily and just felt....content. The kind of content
I've only ever felt while being held by Owen.

	"I love you," he said softly and nuzzled my cheek with his nose.

	I sighed happily, and squirmed a bit because now HIS breath was
tickling me. "I love you too."

	He gave me another quick kiss. "So, let's just have fun this
weekend, ok? No matter what happens or doesn't happen, let's just enjoy
being together and not worry about anything else, ok?"

	Asking me not to worry is kind of like asking Tang not to taste
horrible. But it was Owen asking and I already felt relaxed and -quick
check to make sure- yep, not a single worry in sight right then. So it
wasn't that hard to agree. "Ok," I nodded and gave him a smile.

	Then I kissed him again. Just because I could and I was REALLY
loving that.

	But then he kissed me back and the whole thing started up again
and, honestly, I was getting embarrassingly turned on and I don't know what
would have ended up happening if someone hadn't started pounding on our
door.

	"Hey!" Cheryl yelled, her voice a bit muffled through the thick ass
hotel door. "Get your tongues out of each others butts and let's go to
dinner!"

	I blushed and jerked back away from Owen. Did she really have to
just yell out stuff like that in the hallway- and do people even DO stuff
like that outside of porn, uh, not that I watch a lot of porn or anything
or-

	Owen stroked my hand softly with the backs of his fingers. "No
worrying, right love?"

	I relaxed instantly. God, I love when he calls me that. You don't
even know. "Right," I nodded. I may have been blushing slightly but I'm
just gonna pretend it's from happiness and not because of any images I
might still have in my head.

	He smiled, then scowled when Cheryl started pounding on the door
again. "We're coming!" he yelled.

	I heard what sounded like choked laughter coming from the other
side of the door and the possible blush turned into a full on one. "Oh
god," I moaned and buried my head in Owen's shoulder.

	"What?" he asked. "What's wr-...oh. Um, sorry."

	I shook my head. "It's not your fault," I mumbled into his
neck. "Stupid Cheryl."

	His arms tightened around me as he chuckled. "You ready to go eat?"

	And because this is just how things work, my stomach growled. I
sighed. "Apparently."

	Owen laughed and took a step back. I missed his arms, but I shook
my head and tried to get myself in 'outside mode'. Which was gonna be one
of the hardest things about this trip, I realized. Going from affectionate
boyfriends in the room to just friends outside of it. I sighed again,
already exhausted just thinking about it.

	"You ok?" Owen asked.

	I nodded. "Yeah."

	He raised an unconvinced eyebrow.

	"I am, I swear," I said. "I just...wish I could stay in here with
you forever."

	"Me too," he said and gave me a quick kiss. "But we're gonna enjoy
ourselves anyway, I promise."

	I smiled. "Good enough for me."

**

	Dinner was actually really good, even if I wasn't comparing it to
the last dinner I had with Cheryl and Owen. We went to a nice restaurant
overlooking the beach and somehow managed to get a table on the deck
outside. I tried not to think about how romantic it would have been if it
was just me and Owen, mostly because even if it was just the two of us we
still would have had to pretend we weren't together.

	Aunt Karen was as cool as she always was and she never once acted
like it was strange or wrong to have Owen with us. She talked to him and
joked with him just as much as she did with me and Cheryl and it was nice
to know that she liked him. A few times I did catch her giving Owen curious
looks but they weren't hostile, more like she was trying to figure
something out about him. I hoped she wasn't sizing him up as a potential
boyfriend for Cheryl. If her mom said anything to her she might end up
deciding it was perfect cover for me and just going with it.

	I don't even think Cheryl could keep three fake relationships
straight.

	After dinner we drove into the actual town of Turtle Beach. It was
about a mile away from the hotel and had lots of little shops and
stuff. Mostly the kind of things you always see in beach vacation areas but
there were some cool local places too, including this one awesome shop that
sold antique and replica swords that I went in every time I passed it. Owen
fell in love with it too and we ended up spending a lot of time in there
while Aunt Karen dragged Cheryl off, probably to try and force her to do
"girl" things like, gasp, buying clothes.

	I tried not to snicker too much when I thought about it.

	After that it was getting late so we went back to the
hotel. Walking into the room with Owen the second time was like total night
and day from the first. Well, I guess technically it WAS night and day
since it was dark now but, you get what I mean. I didn't feel nervous or
pressured at all and that's probably why it took us about five minutes to
fall into bed wrapped around each other.

	We didn't do anything new. Just kissing and some touching at first,
then, finally after wanting it for two weeks we did the rubbing thing
again. It was just as good as the first time. Better even, since I was only
about half as embarrassed after as I was last time. I DID have a tiny bit
of panic about us ruining two more pair of underwear but Owen calmed me
down (with a kiss of course) and we ended up just soaking them in the sink
overnight.

	After that we got changed for bed. Separately, of course. I wasn't
quite ready for Owen to see the full Andy yet. It was bad enough that I'd
be wearing shorts tomorrow so he'd have to see my legs...and doesn't that
just sound all 19th century. But the best part of the night wasn't any of
that. It was after we said goodnight and kissed some more, when I got to
cuddle up next to Owen in bed and fall asleep with my head on his shoulder.

	It was even better than in my dreams.

**

	"I smell horrible," I complained for the eighth time as we walked
down the beach.

	"No one said you had to put that much sunscreen on," Cheryl said,
exasperated. She kicked a seashell down towards the water. She had her hair
pulled back in a ponytail and was wearing a dark blue tankini and I kinda
hated that I even knew what it was called. It didn't really hide how
ridiculously fit she was and every tie I looked at her I got just a little
bit more jealous that she ripples when she moves and I'm just
sorta....flat.

	I stopped. "Do you SEE this skin?" I held up my hand. "It's, like,
whiter than your teeth. I can FEEL it trying to burn off."

	I glared at the sun, which wasn't one of the smartest things I've
ever done.

	"Ow," I blinked my eyes rapidly, trying to get rid of the big
yellow sun shaped blob of color blocking my vision. "I hate summer."

	"It's spring," Cheryl said.

	"I hate that too," I glared at her. Or, at least where her voice
came from since I still couldn't see right. Stupid sun.

	"I don't even know why you put that much on anyway," Cheryl said,
ignoring my sun problems. "You're wearing a friggin' long sleeve shirt
anyway."

	This time I kicked sand at her. "Yeah, well.....shut up."

	She laughed.

	I just scowled and got even more annoyed because I couldn't say
anything back. Not because I didn't have a reason for dumping practically
an entire bottle of sun tan lotion on me before we left the room, but
because I didn't want to admit it.

	Even though Turtle Beach isn't exactly the spring break hotspot of,
say, Virginia Beach, I've never even considered taking my shirt off here,
but there was a part of me that was sorta hoping Owen would convince me. I
know that totally goes against the no pressure thing, but I've never swam
in the actual ocean before and out of all the 'first times' that could
happen with Owen this weekend, that one seemed the
least...complicated. That isn't the only reason though. After waking up
literally on top of Owen this morning and being able to just enjoy it for a
full five minutes before I got all awkward about it was more than nice. For
whatever reason, my Andyness seemed to be lessened a bit and for the first
time in my life I was -sort of- interested in pushing past my comfort
zone. A little.

	But I'd still need a lot of convincing.

	"Here comes radio boy with your ice cream, maybe that'll make you
complain less," Cheryl said.

	I was so glad that the yellow blob thingy was clearing up, because
watching Owen run across the beach was easily one of the top ten highlights
of my life.

	He looked great without a shirt. Actually, his top bits were a lot
like mine. He was skinny and flat, except where he had a little bit of baby
fat on his stomach, and a little wider in the shoulders and waist. A lot
like what I see in the mirror everyday, but on Owen it looked great. Maybe
it was the way his skin was already starting to tan instead of turning
lobster red and peeling off, or maybe he's just naturally better looking
than me topless.

	And speaking of turning red, hopefully anyone looking would think
the blush was just my skin starting to burn because I was staring a little
too much at him and, yeah, definitely drooling a bit. Not the best way to
play 'only friends'.

	"Hey," he said, breathing a bit heavily. He held out one of the ice
cream cones he was holding. "Here, vanilla right?"

	I grinned and took it. "You remembered."

	And, ok, yeah I just told him like ten minutes ago but it was still
romantic to me. Or something. Shut up.

	I gave it a lick and Owen stilled, biting his lip. Is...is he
watching me...lick? I blushed, hard. Then remembered the whole 'comfort
zone' thing and forced myself to lick it again. I didn't mean to do it as
slow as I did. It was just kinda hard to force me to do it when I knew that
I was flirting, so it took longer. But he swallowed heavily and bit his lip
harder and just looked so damn sexy that I didn't exactly regret it.

	"Hey, where's mine?" Cheryl asked, cutting into our sorta moment.

	Owen frowned and licked his lips, nervously though so it wasn't as
sexy. "Um, y-you said you didn't want any."

	I sighed and glared at Cheryl. "Ignore her, she's teasing."

	She stuck her tongue out at me. "You're no fun."

	I ignored her.

	We walked along the beach in silence for a few minutes. All around
us people were either sunbathing or wakeboarding or swimming or chasing
their little kids down when they got too close to the water. I felt a bit
uncomfortable around all those people, but not as much as I usually do, so
I actually enjoyed the walk this year instead of practically dragging
Cheryl passed the worst of the crowds. Still, I was looking forward to
getting down the beach a little bit past the hotels where there weren't as
many people.

	I finished eating my ice cream cone a little after Owen and when I
was done I noticed him staring at me.

	"What?" I asked self consciously. I ducked my head automatically
before I remembered that I'd tied my hair back today for Owen. Huh. I
didn't even remember feeling exposed with my hair back. Weird.

	"You've got a little..." he said and reached over and wiped
something off my face.

	I jumped back. "Wh-what?" I frantically rubbed at my face because
if there was still anything there he might touch me again and touching my
face in public is way, WAY past 'comfort zone' and into 'never go there'
zone and God I hope nobody saw-

	"Oh come on," Cheryl said. "You're seriously overreacting, Andy. No
ones even looking, you don't need to freak out."

	I blushed, because, yeah, it WAS true. No one was even giving us a
second glance. But also because someone COULD have been looking. But then I
looked at Owen and before he covered it up he looked just a little bit sad,
and I suddenly felt bad.

	"Sorry," I mumbled.

	"It's ok," he said, and gave me a small smile. I opened my mouth to
apologize again. "No, really, it's ok. I get it. It's just easy to forget
that we have to hide here, you know?"

	I nodded, even though I didn't really know. I NEVER forget that I
need to hide. It's as much a part of my life as breathing. But I sorta
understood what he was trying to say anyway.

	"Still, I'm sorry," I said. I summoned up all the boldness and
daring I had and, just for a half second, brushed the back of my hand
against his.

	The smile that got was more than worth the three years it took off
my life.

	 We walked along the beach some more, me and Owen a little bit
closer than we probably needed to be since neither one of us moved away
after I touched his hand. Every once and a while his hand would knock
against mine, totally accidentally, and I had to fight the urge to pull
away. Dammit, I already made Owen sad once today and there's no way in hell
I'm doing it again!

	"OH. MY. GOD!" Someone screeched, pulling me out of my thoughts.

	Jesus that was loud. I looked around, half expecting to see someone
being murdered or something horrible like that, but all I saw was a girl,
running across the beach.

	Right toward us.

	She was thin and blonde, with her hair done up in some kind of
complicated knot thing that I could see getting more and more loose and
unknotted with every running step she took. She also had ridiculously big,
um, front bits and even though I've been really, seriously, gay forever I
couldn't look away. Not from her parts, from the magic fabric of her
too-small-to-be-legal sky blue bikini that somehow kept them from flying
out and smacking her in the face. It was so mesmerizing I forgot to panic
about the whole running towards me thing.

	The she got closer and about the time I noticed that she was the
kind of pretty that Cheryl usually wanted to punch in the face she didn't
look like she was slowing down even a little and if she was gonna run into
the ocean she was gonna go right through us and....she's not running to the
ocean, is she?

	I stiffened and my heart sped up as she made a beeline right for
me. I was in the middle of deciding if I should try a dodge or not when she
pulled up and stopped right in front of me, breathing heavily.

	"Oh. My. God," she said again, looking right at me as she caught
her breath. "Your hair is amazing!"

	I....what?

	"Who the hell are you?" Cheryl asked, probably scowling.

	The girl ignored her.

	"How do you get it like that? Do you use girl shampoo? Because I
have a friend who uses girl shampoo because his mom buys it for him and HIS
hair looks almost as good as yours and I'm jealous of it because it takes
me forever to get mine to look good but I'm SUPER jealous of yours because
it's so long and straight and it shines and looks great pulled back and
what do you do to it?" she asked.

	She somehow managed to get all that out without taking a breath,
even though she was in the middle of taking a breath when she started.

	But, seriously, what?!

	Without even waiting for me to say anything -not that I would have
of course- she reached out to touch my hair. I squeaked and took a few
steps back, suddenly completely sure that she was some kind of psycho and I
was about to get stabbed. Even though I didn't wanna think about where she
might be hiding a knife in that thing she was almost wearing. Owen got in
front of me, standing between me and the girl and crossing his arms. I
instantly melted of course. There may have even been a sigh before I got
control of myself. In front of the escaped mental patient is NOT the time
to be acting like that.

	But then, to my horror, she NOTICED it. Her grin somehow got even
wider and she started to bounce on the balls of her feet.

	"Oh! Oh! Oh! OH!" she shouted giddily. "That is SO CUTE! Are you
two together, or do you just have a secret crush on him or something?"

	I paled. Actually I'm pretty sure my heart stopped too. Owen's head
snapped around to me, a worried look on his face. That got even more
worried when he saw me. He looked like he wanted to comfort me but didn't
know how and I was so glad that he didn't try to touch me again because I
think that might have actually killed me and someone FOUND OUT and it was
all my fault, just like I always knew it would be.

	"Shut the fuck up," Cheryl hissed, moving to stand next to
Owen. "Or I'll punch you in your throat."

	That got the girl to look away from me for the first time. I could
have kissed Cheryl for that.

	"Oh," she said, chewing on her lip. "Are they yours?"

	What does that even mean?

	"What?" Cheryl asked.

	"You know," the girl said with an eye roll. "Your gay boys."

	I winced and hunched over on myself. Owen stood closer to
me. Cheryl glared.

	"Shut up!" Cheryl growled. "Can't you see he's about to pass out?"

	"Oh," the girl turned back to me and cocked her head. "Yeah he does
kinda look bad."

	She turned back to Cheryl.

	"Do they kiss for you? Because if they do you HAVE to tell me how
you got the-"

	"Michelle!" another voice yelled, cutting her off.

	She turned toward the voice, smiled and waved.

	Oh god, what now?

	I reluctantly turned toward the new voice also. Two boys were
running up to us.

	The first one to reach us was blond, very pretty -although still
somehow slightly more manly than me, ugh- and about two inches shorter than
me. He had his hair pulled back into the tiniest, nubbiest ponytail I'd
ever seen. Well, half of it anyway, the front half had either escaped or
hadn't been pulled back and was hanging down the sides of his face. He was
pale too. Pale like me but he didn't look like he had any sun tan lotion on
and there wasn't even the tiniest bit of redness on his skin. I forgot to
freak out just long enough to be jealous of that, and of the bright blue
eyes that I'd always wished I'd had.

	The second boy was brown. Brown hair, tanned brown skin, but his
eyes were steel gray. Where the first boy had a body a lot like mine,
mostly slim and flat, this boy had lightly defined muscle in his chest,
arms and stomach that rippled when he moved. He was the kind of gorgeous
that I was so scared Owen was going to be and I was instantly more than a
little intimidated, even though he looked ridiculously innocent and pretty
much the definition of nonthreatening. I couldn't really tell because they
were both standing in uneven sand, but he also looked just a little bit
taller than the first boy.

	"What," the first boy glared at the girl, "the hell are you doing?"

	"I found more gay boys," she said happily, pointing at me and Owen
and taking another four years off my life. "His hair's better than
yours. Actually, they both have pretty awesome hair."

	The blond one opened his mouth like he was about to say something,
then shut it, shook his head and pinched the bridge of his
nose. "I....you....we left you alone for THREE minutes and you....." he
sighed. "Jesus fuck."

	"I was just about to see if they kiss and stuff," the girl,
Michelle I guess, said helpfully.

	"No, Michelle, no. Just....no." the blond one said. "Go away
please. Back to the blankets with you."

	"What?" she asked, sounding legitimately confused. "I'm just making
friends."

	"Friends?" the brown one said. "That one looks like he's about to
throw up and the other two look like that want to kill you. That's...kinda
not making friends."

	The blond one nodded rapidly.

	"They're still adorable though," Michelle said. She started to say
something but the blonde boy cut her off.

	"Look," he said through gritted teeth, looking at us. "I'm
sorry. Apparently she got out of her cage. We'll just be taking her away
now."

	"You know, it's REALLY insulting talking about someone like they're
not even here," Michelle said.

	"And it's not insulting to run up to people and be all....YOU?!"
the blond one yelled.

	"No!" she yelled back. "It's not! I'm likeable dammit!"

	"You're a fucking embarrassing psycho!" the blond one shouted.

	And that was when the brown one did something that almost really
did make me pass out. He walked over and slid his arm around the waist of
the blond one. Right out in the open. Where EVERYONE could see. "Hon, calm
down. People are gonna start calling the beach police or something."

	The blond one instantly relaxed and leaned against the brown one,
who must have been his boyfriend. Real, live gay boys who weren't me or
Owen or Brandon and his friends. It was weird. "Maybe they should," the
blond one said, but he didn't sound angry anymore. "They give psycho pills
in jail, right?"

	The brown one chuckled and pulled the blond one closer, but didn't
say anything. Then they just.....cuddled, right there in front of us. They
didn't even seem to notice that everyone was staring at them. Me, Owen and
Cheryl with different levels of disbelief and Michelle looking like she was
watching two puppies being adorable.

	"So cute," Michelle said, almost under her breath but not even
close to being unheard.

	That broke the spell. The blond one stuck his tongue out at
her. "Shut up," he said.

	The brown one gave him a tiny smile, then seemed to notice that
they were being stared at by more than Michelle. "Um, what?" he asked.

	None of us said anything for a few seconds. Surprisingly, it was me
who broke the silence. "I...y-you...in public..."

	Unsurprisingly, I couldn't actually get anything out.

	"You're....holding each other," Owen said, half in disbelief and
half in awe. "In the open, like it's nothing."

	"Well, yeah," the blond one said. "You mean you don't? Um, I mean,
if you're together or whatever, that is. I just kinda assumed because of,
you know, her." He jerked his head toward Michelle.

	"We can't," Owen said sadly.

	"W-we'd probably g-get killed," I managed to force
out. "Literally." Overdramatic maybe, but it was close enough to the truth
without getting into Jarred and my dad with total strangers.

	The brown one winced, "Sorry. We kinda forget that happens to
people sometimes."

	"You mean it never happens to you?" Owen asked.

	"Nope," the blond one shook his head. "Well, maybe a little this
year, but it was just idiots, you know? Not, like, death squads or
anything."

	"Wow," Owen said. "You must live somewhere awesome."

	The blond one snorted. "We live in West Virginia, not exactly gay
pride capital of the world."

	"Then, why don't you have to hide?" Owen asked.

	"Fangirls," the blond one said.

	"Um, what?" Owen asked.

	The brown one chuckled and the blond one said, "Oh, uh, it may not
seem like it now but that," he pointed to Michelle, "is actually useful for
something."

	"Hey!" she said, pouting.

	"Quiet you," the blond one said.

	"Ok, I'm sorry, but, who the hell are you people?" Cheryl cut
in. Even with the three heart attacks I was seconds away from having, I was
still impressed that she managed to keep quiet this long.

	"Oh," the blond one said, smiling sheepishly. "Um, sorry. I'm
Nate."

	"I'm Michelle!" Michelle said with a grin and a wave.

	"Yeah, we got that," Cheryl said, glaring at her.

	"And my name's Victor, but everyone calls me Vicky," the brown one
said.

	The blo-Nate, gave him a goofy smile as he introduced himself and I
couldn't help wondering if that's how I look whenever Owen does something
melt-worthy. I had no idea what's melt-worth about introducing yourself
though.

	"Vicky?" Cheryl asked skeptically. Which, yeah I guess a guy
calling himself Vicky is a bit weird.

	"You got a problem with that?" Michelle said, scowling and crossing
her arms. If she was going for intimidating, she was trying it against the
wrong person. It probably would have worked against me though. Something
about her being the first person -besides Nurse Amy I guess- to figure me
out was freaking scary.

	"I have a problem with you," Cheryl said.

	"Everyone has a problem with her," Nate muttered under his breath,
flipping his hair out of his eyes.

	Everyone was silent for a few seconds, then Vicky smirked and
started chuckling. "Yeah, Vicky. My dad started calling me that when I was
a kid and now he's like the only one who doesn't," he shrugged. "I like it
though."

	"I like it too," Nate said, smiling at him.

	Vicky smiled and looked like he was about to kiss him, but at the
last second shot a dark look at Michelle -who was looking way too excited-
and backed off. Which was good, because I think seeing two boys kiss in
public would have finally killed me.

	And then, for the first time since this whole thing started, Nate
spoke to me, "Hey, uh, are you ok?"

	I jumped, then blushed. Stupid shyness. "Um, no?" I
answered. Dammit Andy, you know you're supposed to say yes when strangers
ask you stuff like that!

	"Sorry," Nate said with a sorta strained smile. "I swear she's not
usually that bad. Even around us."

	"I'm never bad," Michelle stuck her tongue out at him.

	"I-I-," I swallowed. "Ok. Um, thanks? I think. Um, for stopping her
before she, I dunno, touched me or s-something."

	Nate's jaw dropped, then he spun around. "You tried to TOUCH him?!"

	"Just his hair!" she said defensively.

	Nate relaxed a bit, "Oh, ok that's not as bad-no, that's still bad!
Don't go around touching people! What are you, two?!"

	He held up a hand before she could say anything then turned back
around. "Look, seriously, I'm sorry about her. I think everyone here got
off on, like, the wrongest foot ever. But, you guys seem nice and, most
importantly, sane. Which is a nice change. So! Maybe we could all just
start over before your girl friend -that's friend who's a girl, not, like,
implying some threeway thing or whatever, unless that's how it is and then,
uh, cool?- um, before she kills Michelle. Ok?"

	"No!" I yelled, then blushed. "I m-mean, no to the....thing. About
Cheryl. Um, ew. Never. In a million years. Ever. But um," I shrugged
awkwardly as the shyness caught up with my massive freak out about someone
thinking I was WITH Cheryl in any way, even a weird freaky threesome
way-and does that kind of thing even happen? Ew. No. Not thinking about
it. "maybe? I guess? To the other thing?"

	Vicky giggled. "Oh, you two sound like you'll get along."

	Owen nodded, "Yeah, ok. Just," he looked at Michelle, "don't touch
him, ok?"

	She sighed, a full bodied dramatic sigh, but nodded. "Fine," she
moped. "But only if you guys kiss for me."

	The blood drained from my face again.

	"Michelle!" Nate and Vicky said in unison.

	"Ugh! That's so adorable," Michelle sighed. "Fine, no kissing I
guess."

	"So, um, what are your names?" Vicky asked after a few seconds of
awkward silence.

	"I'm Cheryl," Cheryl said. She still glared at Michelle, but for
some reason didn't seem as hostile towards Nate and Vicky. Which was weird
because she usually doesn't like new people. For a second, I wondered if
maybe she was doing this to show me that boyfriends can be all boyfriendy
around people and not get punched in the...everything, but no. Not even
Cheryl would go that far just to prove a point.

	...

	"I'm Owen," Owen said, with a small, sorta shy smile. It was cute
as always when he got shy, but what was even better was the way he didn't
let his shyness get in the way of trying to protect me. He still made sure
to stand between me and Michelle, and I promised myself that I'd kiss him
for that. Later, of course.

	"Andy," I said quietly. Now that the freak out adrenaline was going
away it was kind of hitting home that I was TALKING to people I'd never met
before, and I could feel myself getting more shy and awkward by the second.

	"Nice to meet you guys," Vicky said with a smile.

	"Same," Owen said.

	"Most of you anyway," Cheryl said, still glaring at Michelle.

	Who glared back. "Why are you so mean?" she snapped.

	"Why are you so creepy?" Cheryl shot back.

	"I'M NOT CREEPY!" Michelle yelled.

	Nate, Vicky, Owen and I all snorted at the same time.

	"You run up to people on the beach you've never met and touch their
hair," Cheryl said.

	"He has nice hair!"

	"That doesn't mean you can touch it!"

	"Don't tell me what to do, tankini!"

	"At least I'm not falling out of my bathing suit because it's five
sizes to small, slut!"

	Nate sighed, "Oh, yeah, starting over totally worked."

	"Don't call me a slut, you steroid popping tomboy!" Michelle
screeched.

	I giggled, then clapped my hands over my mouth, hoping no one
noticed.

	They did.

	"What?" Cheryl snapped.

	"Um," I said, coughing to cover up the giggles. "Nothing?"

	Cheryl's eyes narrowed. "You're laughing at what she said about me,
aren't you?" she asked slowly.

	I shook my head. "No." Cheryl raised an eyebrow. "Seriously! I'm
laughing at how pissed off you're getting. It's....you don't usually get
this mad at people who aren't me. Not without punching them. It's funny."

	"It is not," Cheryl said, crossing her arms.

	"Yeah," Michelle said. "It's not funny, she called me a slut!"

	"I call you a slut every time you squeeze into that thing," Nate
said helpfully.

	"But you're you and she's....her!" Michelle said and actually
stomped her foot.

	I had to fight back another giggle at that. It's amazing how funny
things get when you're not really a part of them anymore.

	"I don't think I've ever seen Michelle make friends before," Vicky
said, smirking a smirk that seemed so out of place on his innocent looking
face.

	"What?" Michelle and Cheryl said at the same time, turning pretty
identical incredulous looks at him.

	"It's definitely love at first sight," he said.

	"Ew! No it's not!" Michelle said. Cheryl stuck out her tongue and
gagged.

	"She's the exact same way with our other friend Erica," Nate
said. "And they're all totally in love and crap."

	"WE ARE NOT!" Michelle yelled, getting really red in the face. "I
TOLD YOU A MILLION TIMES I'M NOT A LESBIAN!"

	That got us more looks than I was comfortable with and I wished I
had some free hair to hide behind.

	"Yeah, that doesn't scream denial at ALL," Nate rolled his eyes.

	"I'M NOT DE-"

	"Are you hitting on me?" Cheryl cut her off with a disgusted frown.

	"NO! I'M NOT!" Michelle yelled. "A lesbian! Or hitting on you! Or
denial! Or-GAH!"

	And with that she threw up her hands and stalked back towards where
she'd come running from before. Every single head on the beach following
her the whole way.

	"So!" Nate said a few seconds later, clapping his hands
together. "Starting over?"

	"Um," Owen said. "Is she....ok?"

	Nate waved his hand dismissively. "Oh yeah, she's just gonna sulk
or whatever for a while. She'll be fine when she calms down enough to
realize she's missing out on anything cute we might be doing." He frowned
at that. "Hopefully not any time soon..."

	"Oh, um, ok," Owen said with a tiny shrug.

	"Was she really hitting on me?" Cheryl asked.

	Vicky laughed, "No, she...it's a long story, but it's the best way
to get her to go away when she's being..."

	"Crazy?" Nate supplied.

	"No, actually-"

	"CraziER."

	"Yeah," Vicky nodded. "That one."

	"Oh," Cheryl said, sounding relieved. "Good."

	"So, how long are you guys here?" Nate asked.

	"Till Monday," Owen said.

	"Cool, us too. Wanna um, I dunno hang out or something?" he
asked. "Away from Michelle," he added quickly.

	Cheryl looked at me, then Owen looked at me, then I felt my face
getting hot because everyone started looking at me. I guess I get to make
the decision.

	Joy.

	"Um," I swallowed. I opened my mouth to say no, but I was shocked
into silence by the fact that I was actually conflicted about it. Part of
me was curious about two gay boys who acted like boyfriends in public. It
was something I wouldn't even be able to think about having until at least
college -and even then only depending on what college I went to- and I
sorta wanted to see what it was like without having to worry about being
caught doing it myself. Even though I'd probably end up blushing all damn
day. But even more than all that I could tell by the way Owen was trying
not to give me a hopeful look that he wanted me to say yes without
pressuring me, and really that decided it. "Sure?"

	Cheryl looked surprised. Owen looked surprised but pleased. Nate
just grinned, "Cool. I've never had vacation friends before."

	Vicky opened his mouth but Nate cut him off without even looking at
him, "The twins at the ski place don't count. They were creepy ass
stalkers, not friends."

	Vicky closed his mouth and shot the back of Nate's head an amused
little smile.

	"So, I guess you'd wanna avoid going back to the blankets with the
Wicked-Creeper Witch of the West, right?" Nate asked us.

	We all nodded in unison.

	"Figured," he said. "So there's kind of a cool game room at our
hotel, it has like arcade machines and pool tables and food and stuff,
wanna hang out there for a while? It's got a Mortal Kombat 2 machine," he
added, like it was some kind of special treat.

	But then I saw Owen's eyes light up and, yeah you guessed it, that
decided it. "Ok," I said.

	And that's where we went.

	It was actually kind of fun, for the most part. Nate and Vicky
looked like they were gonna pass out when I stutteringly told them I didn't
really play video games, then they spent the next two hours dragging me
around and making me try out every single machine in the surprisingly big
game room while Owen stood by and gave me increasingly confusing
advice. Seriously, what the HELL does 'quarter circle forward high punch'
even mean?

	It means that Cheryl got to enjoy kicking my ass at video game
fighting too, that's what.

	Eventually they kinda gave up on me being good at anything -thank
god- and they all started to play each other. Nate was really good at one
of the fighting games, Street Fighter 2 Turbo...something, beating everyone
easily. Until he played Owen. Who kicked his ass. And I might have been
feeling comfortable around them by then because there's a small chance that
I celebrated a little too much and maybe even gloated a little bit.

	So of course they fought each other like thirty seven more times.

	Owen won the most games. Nate looked annoyed, apparently he doesn't
usually lose at Street Fighter, and Vicky comforted him with a lot of hugs
while shooting amused smirks at me and Owen over his shoulder. I just
beamed proudly at Owen. I may not care about video games much, but if I'm
gonna watch people play them for an hour I want my boyfriend to win,
dammit!

	After that we went over to the pool tables and THAT was a lot of
fun. I'd played pool a bunch of times with my dad on vacations, so I knew
how to play, but what I didn't know was that I was actually good at it,
instead of my dad just sucking because he's old. I beat Nate, then Vicky,
then Cheryl, then Owen (which I kinda felt bad about) and then we decided
to play two against two, with the worst player from each game trading out
with the person not playing. Which actually worked better than you'd think
it would. The team with me won more often than not, so I got to feel good
about that too. Although the game with me and Nate versus Owen and Vicky
was a little weird.

	Especially after someone brought up sci fi stuff and it turned out
that Owen and Vicky both liked Star Trek over Star Wars and they spent half
the games talking animatedly about the show. It annoyed me a bit that they
had to keep being reminded to take their turns, but Nate seemed to take it
personally.

	"You know," Nate shouted over at them. "Picard broke the Prime
Directive, like, eight times and he never once got in any trouble for
it. Main character syndrome much?"

	They ignored him.

	"I can't BELIEVE anyone can like that show over Star Wars," he
grumbled, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. "I mean, come on!
It's a good show but the Force, the Death Star, the freaking EMPIRE, does
Star Trek have anything that cool in any of the shows OR movies? I think
not."

	He turned to me.

	"Please tell me you like Star Wars more than Star Trek," he
pleaded.

	"Um," I bit my lip and shifted awkwardly. "I've, um, never really
watched either one?"

	He stared at me for almost a full minute -more than a little
uncomfortable- then slowly shook his head. "Jesus tapdancing Christ," he
said quietly. "Heathens. I'm surrounded by heathens."

	He pushed off the wall and went over to the table to violently jam
the chalk thingy on his stick.

	After a while Michelle found us and started to give Nate and Vicky
shit about leaving her. They brushed it off and somehow made her apologize
to us again. Even Cheryl, who still looked like she wanted to punch her but
managed a grumbled "Sorry, too" when I gave her my best glare.

	They refused to team up for pool though.

	During lunch we all talked. Well, everyone else did. I mostly
stayed silent. We found out a lot about Nate and Vicky though. Not only did
their friends know about them and not have a problem with it but their
PARENTS knew too and still didn't have a problem. I was more than
jealous. And then slightly less jealous when they clarified and said that
Vicky's dad and Nate's mom were actually divorced, and sorta dating.

	"Um," I asked. "Doesn't that make you guys....uh...incest?"

	Nate scowled and Vicky rolled his eyes. "I don't wanna think about
it," Nate growled. "Maybe they'll break up before the stupid wedding."

	Vicky patted his hand consolingly, but rolled his eyes again so I
got the idea it wasn't bothering him half as much.

	Their whole life seemed really complicated and completely
unrealistic, but still great. But the thing I noticed the most about the
whole conversation wasn't anything to do with them. It was Owen. Every time
they talked about doing something together or their parents dropping them
off to go on dates together or all the friends they had that didn't have a
problem with them, he got this look of longing on his face that I'd never
seen before.

	It broke my heart a little bit.

	I felt bad that we couldn't live someplace where we could be like
that, where I could have grown up to be comfortable even THINKING about
being like that.  I'd never realized that Owen wanted that so much. I made
a promise to myself right there that I'd do whatever I could to push my
stupid anxiety and shy, self-conscious Andyness down and be a normal couple
in the hotel room. Without him feeling like he needed to step on eggshells
to keep from pressuring me. But it still didn't feel like enough. No matter
how we were in the hotel room, we'd only be here for two more days. After
that it was back to the hiding and the worrying. I needed to do more, but I
didn't know what I could do.

	The thought stayed in the back of my head.

	By the time we finished eating all the pool tables were full and no
one really had any money left for games. We spent a few minutes trying to
figure out what to do but before we really got anywhere Cheryl's mom called
her cell phone looking for us.

	"No, mom, we're not at the beach," she said.

	"Yeah, I know you said 'don't leave the beach but'-"

	"No, we're not at the hotel either. I'm trying-"

	"God! Mom! We're not-" she lowered her voice to a harsh
whisper. "-DOING anything."

	"No," she sighed. "We're in a game room."

	"In a hotel."

	"NO! Not in a hotel room! Seriously, what the hell? I'm not a
slut!"

	Michelle snickered and I blushed, suddenly realizing what the other
half of the conversation must be like. It could be worse, though, I
guess. It could be me trying to explain it. I'd probably do such a horrible
job of telling the truth that she'd assume I'm lying.

	"We met some people on the beach and went back to their hotel- and
I swear to GOD if you say anything I'm never talking to you again- to the
game room and spent a few hours there."

	"I dunno, they're just people."

	"No, mom, people our age. Sorry to tear apart your drunk college
orgy theory."

	"Yeah, actually, I'm really funny."

	"No, I- NO! We're- Yes Andy and Owen are with me."

	"But we were gonna-"

	She growled, "Fine. See you in a few minutes."

	She hung up.

	"Well, we need to go," she said with a scowl. "Apparently leaving
the beach means we're having drunken twelve-ways with everyone who walks by
or something."

	I blushed harder, "Oh god."

	"Um, does she really...?" Owen asked hesitantly.

	Cheryl snorted, "She will until she sees us and yells at me for a
while, so we should probably go get that over with."

	Owen sighed. "Alright," he said reluctantly.

	Michelle opened her mouth to say something, but Nate elbowed her in
the stomach.

	"Ow!" she said.

	He ignored her. "So, you gotta go?"

	"Yeah," Cheryl nodded. "Um, I can't believe I'm even saying this
but I actually had fun. Just not the fun my mom thinks I'm having." she
added with a growl. "I should just tell her all the guys around me are gay
and see what she says to that."

	She looked at me and added quickly. "Kidding Andy."

	I rolled my eyes. "I'm not THAT bad," I mumbled.

	Nate chuckled. "We did too," he said. Vicky nodded. "Do you think
you'll be let out of your room for the rest of your trip? We could hang out
again?"

	 Cheryl shrugged. "I wouldn't mind."

	"That would be fun," Owen said.

	I nodded.

	"Cool," Vicky said. "See you guys hopefully later then."

	We all waved, Cheryl and Michelle managed to exchange one last
glare, then we started the walk back to the beach and to our hotel.

	"So," Owen asked me. "Did you really have fun."

	I nodded. "Yeah, actually I did. Nate and Vicky were kinda cool."

	"Yeah. Lucky too," he added wistfully.

	That sad look crossed his face again and I wanted to hold his hand,
or hug him or SOMETHING. All I could do though was brush the back of my
hand against his again. It got me a small, but sincere, smile, but it was
gone quickly. He kept his head down, looking at the sand and chewing on his
lip as we walked, thinking.

	But he wasn't the only one thinking. And before we got back to the
hotel, I made a decision.

**

	Me and Owen rushed into the hotel room as quickly as we could,
shoving the door shut behind us. I locked everything that could possibly be
locked, then let out a sigh of relief.

	"Wow," Owen said. "That was awkward."

	I nodded rapidly. "Oh yeah. I've seen Cheryl and Aunt Karen fight
before, but never about something so..." I blushed. "Sex related."

	Owen shuddered, then walked over to the bed and sat down. I
followed and sat down next to him. I knew it was my imagination but I could
have sworn I could hear Cheryl and her mom yelling at each other from four
rooms away.

	"Are they gonna fight for the rest of the trip?" Owen asked.

	"I doubt it," I said, hoping I sounded more confident about that
than I was. "They don't usually."

	I must have succeeded because Owen relaxed a bit. "Ok," he
said. "Good."

	The silence that fell after that was awkward.

	Well, it was to me at least. Now that I wasn't totally embarrassed
and more than a little scared by being right in front of a shouting match,
all I could think about was the decision I made. I took a deep breath, then
reached for Owen's hand.

	He gave me a startled look that quickly turned into a smile. A
smile that slowly melted away when he saw the look on my face. "What's
wrong?" he asked.

	"Nothing," I answered. "Um, I just...."

	I started to chew my lip and he gave my hand a reassuring
squeeze. I let out a breath and shook my head, annoyed with myself. Making
a decision like this should be the hard part, telling Owen about it should
be way easier.

	Ha.

	"Are you ok?" Owen asked.

	I sighed because he'd been asking that way too much on this trip
and even though I loved it I didn't want him to spend his whole vacation
worrying about me. "I'm ok. But I do wanna tell you something."

	He nodded patiently.

	I took a deep breath and tried to ignore how much my face was
burning. "Um, whenever you want to, um, do anything, we can, ok?"

	Owen shot me a confused frown. "Huh?"

	"Dammit, I'm not explaining this right at all. Um, I mean, like,
you know, if you wanna do anything like....s-sex...stuff....we can."

	"Andy..." Owen started.

	"No, wait," I cut in. "I know w-what you're gonna say and I'm not
pressured. I swear."

	"Then why?" he asked. "Yesterday you were freaking out just being
alone in a hotel room together because you didn't know what you were ready
for. I don't want you to do something just because you think I want to-"

	"I'm not!" I said. "I swear I'm not. I...I w-want to...do more..."

	I sighed again. Explaining myself when I'm this embarrassed is
probably the hardest thing ever, but I needed to get it out so Owen would
understand.

	"It's because of today, hanging out with Nate and Vicky," I said.

	That got another frown. "You want to have sex with me because of
two other boys?"

	"No!" I yelled wide eyed and blushed even harder. "N-not like
that!"

	Another deep breath. Come on Andy, you can do this. "I-it was just
the way they were together. Comfortable and secure and I saw how sad you
got when they talked about how open they could be back where they live, and
I hated that. You being sad I mean. But we can't be like that and I wish I
could give that to you but I CAN give you anything here, in this room."

	"So..." Owen said. "It IS because of me?"

	"No! Well...yeah I do wanna have....d-do....things only with you
because you're you but not like I'm being pressured or anything," I said.

	I looked into his eyes and tried to push all the honesty and
'please believe I'm telling the truth, I'm doing the best I can' into my
eyes that I could.

	"I WANT to. I...I like being with you. Like, when we do.....what we
did before. And," I felt my face practically melting off and my heart about
to explode. "I want to do more," I said softly. "I-I don't care if it's now
or in two years, but I don't want you holding back anything you want just
because you think I'm not ready. There's so much we're never going to have
because of other people, I don't want us to not have things we could have
because of me."

	There. It was all out. I looked away from Owen. That was one of the
hardest things I've ever had to do and I was too scared to see his
reaction. If he didn't believe me or, even worse, rejected me I wouldn't be
able to take it.

	I kept my death grip on his hand though.

	"Andy..." Owen said softly. With his other hand he gripped me
gently by the chin and turned my face towards his. As terrified as I was, I
didn't even try to resist. But it turns out it would have been unnecessary
anyway, there was nothing in his eyes or his expression besides a quiet
warmth that sent my heart speeding up in a completely different way. He
brushed a few strands of hair that had fallen out of my ponytail back
behind my hair and cupped my cheek. "You know, I don't even know what I'M
ready for, right?"

	"Th-that's ok," I said quickly. "I just want you to know that
whenever you're ready, I am too. For anything."

	Owen smiled at me and like always I couldn't help smiling back. He
kissed my softly, once, then rested his forehead against mine. "I love
you," he said, his breath lightly caressing my face.

	"I love you too," I said. And suddenly I decided I wasn't close
enough to him. I climbed onto his lap and sat there, with my legs hanging
over his right leg. He wrapped his arms around my middle as I wrapped mine
around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder.

	It didn't lead to anything else, except maybe some kissing. But
that was ok. Like I told Owen, nothing needed to happen now. But now that I
didn't have to worry about it -about when I'd be ready, what I'd be ready
for, if Owen was getting fed up of waiting, if he felt like we weren't as
close as we could or should be- I could actually feel a bit of
anticipation. A tiny little tight, fluttery feeling in my stomach that
there was something that I could do -that I WANTED to do- for Owen that no
one could take away from us or stop us from doing. Not even me. But that
was for later.

	For now? For now I could just sit here, letting the feeling build,
and enjoy being in the arms or the boy that I loved.


-------------------------------------------

	There, I didn't COMPLETELY abandon Nate and Vicky, see?