Date: Mon, 28 Mar 2011 23:42:47 -0400
From: Alec Tyler <alectyler@live.ca>
Subject: Open Wounds ch 2

This story is a work of fiction. This story contains will at some point
contain sexual contact between two underage males, if this material is
illegal to read then please hit the back button now. Everything in this
story is made up, the names and people are created by the author: Please do
not copy or paste this anywhere else, now that is out of the way please feel
free to email me. alectyler@live.ca
(I stole this from KD and if you don't happen to know who KD is, you should
spend some time and read Some Sense of Security)
**********
I wasted so much time
Just staring at the clock
I thought the pain would stop now
But not a day goes by
That I don't see your face
I can't seem to erase the past
I never gave you my heart
You just stole it away
And if I say you right now
I'd know exactly what to say
**********

Chapter Two

The feeling inside his chest was that of a wounded animal. He was too weak
to live and too strong to die. Wishing that someone would come and finally
end this misery seemed like a blessing. It felt worse than any beating he
had ever received. It felt like there was a giant hole in his chest and
everything was being sucked inward slowly.

Sam felt helpless, he felt bad, terrible in fact for his actions. He tried
to ask for forgiveness a number of times but every time he went to say those
words his mouth would remain shut, it was like his mouth had a mind of its
own and knew something Sam didn't.

Seeing that empty room had done more damage than the bitter words from his
mother. He had hurt someone he cared about. The feeling in his heart was
becoming almost unbearable. He went and sat on the bed, hoping to be closer
to Jake in some way. He reached over and grabbed the pillow and brought it
to his chest and hugged it. It smelled like him and that's all it took for
the water works.  He wondered how he could possibly fix this rift between
them. He had his doubts, could Jake ever trust him again. If he was in
Jake's shoes he doubted he could trust Jake.

Sitting there in the room that had become Jake's, he realized that it was
worth it. He'd do whatever it took to have his Jake back, even if that meant
waiting. Jake was his soul, his breath, his everything.  He'd die before he
gave up, there was no way he would lose him. He'd out himself in front of
the whole school if he had to.

He placed the pillow back on the bed and got up. He walked out of Jake's
room, shutting the door behind him. As he walked down the hall, a picture
caught his eye. The wall was lined with family portraits over the years, his
school photos, his birthday parties and some of just Jake and him together.

The one that caught his eye was the one his mom took of Jake and him at the
beach in just their swim suits. It had just been taken last summer, it was
the day Jake had finally took the plunge and came out to Sam. They both had
smiles plastered on their faces. It was a day he'd never forget, the day
Jake stole his heart.

How could he have let go the one person that made his world whole that made
him so happy.  "I'm sorry Jake" he whispered.

"Sorry for what Sam" a voice said from right behind him.

The sound of the voice made him jump and stammer.  He turned around and saw
that he wasn't as alone in the house as he thought.

"What's wrong Sam" Mark said.

Mark was his oldest friend, they grew up, experienced everything together.
He was there when Sam first learned how to ride a bike or when he had his
first swimming lessons. They tackled everything head on as they grew. Those
two were twins of destruction their mothers would say.

Mark looked a lot like Sam, both were slim from swimming so much but Mark
was just a tad taller and he was obviously stronger due to being on the
wrestling team at school.

Mark had always been the more forward of the two, the mastermind sort of
speak. When Jake and his family moved here they became the trio, the three
amigos. If their parents thought two were bad, three were torture.

As close as they were, Sam had never had enough guts to come out to Mark. He
was scared, Mark was his best friend. He was practically his brother. Sam
and Jake hid their relationship from everyone but Sam's mother. Sam's house
was like a safe haven to be themselves.

"Sam.... what's wrong?" he asked again.

"Nothing Mark, I'm fine" Sam said hoping his cheeks weren't still stained
with his tears, it was taking everything he had to hold them back now. He
just wanted to be alone.

Mark stepped closer into the hall, closer to Sam. "If it was nothing you
wouldn't be crying, now tell me what's wrong. I can't help if I don't know
what's wrong dude." he said as he took another couple steps closer.

The hole in Sam's chest felt like it was getting bigger, he was having
trouble breathing. "Please don't make me. Please. "He pleaded. He could no
longer hold the tears back. They rained down his face, Mark didn't waste any
time and hurried the last few steps and grabbed onto Sam, trying to comfort
him somehow.

Mark had never seen his friend in this kind of state before and it scared
him, it was like there was no life left in Sam's life. He was afraid what
Sam would have done if he hadn't of showed up. Would he still be still
alive? No one knew that answer except Sam and he was a sobbing mess in
Mark's arms.
"It'll be okay Sam just tell me what's wrong" he pleaded back, afraid to let
go.

"Y...you...you..you'll hate ...hate me" Sam got out between his sobs. Mark
didn't have time to feel bad that Sam didn't trust in their friendship. Mark
put those thoughts away for another time, a less pressing time.

"I won't hate you buddy" Mark promised him.

"Y...yes.... yess.... you....you will" Sam said sobbing harder.

Sam pushed away from Mark, trying to get away. Sam bumped into the wall and
slid down.

"I'm ... I'm in.... I'm in love... with Jake" He whimpered.

Silence, the hallway was deadly quiet, it had an eerie feel to it too. Mark
took a step forward, Sam flinched. Mark crouched down so that they were eye
to eye.

"Really?" Mark asked

Sam knew that Mark wouldn't take it well, he still had time to deny it
didn't he? He opened his mouth but nothing came out. He was choking on his
words, he couldn't lie, and lying would be like denying the last six months.
Denying his love for Jake and he couldn't do that.

"Is that all that's got you upset" Mark continued

"wa..wait what!" Sam stammered out. Had Sam missed something? There was no
freak show, no beating, just a calm and curious Mark. The shock was just
setting in, he had told Mark.... told Mark he was gay.... and he was ok with
it.....ok?!

"Aren't you mad or something?" Sam probed

"Why? Did you hurt me somehow or just think dirty thoughts about me?" he
asked with his goofy smile.

"Ewww! Gross dude LIKE NO! We're like brothers" Sam said loudly

Sam's words made Mark burst out laughing and soon Sam joined in, he felt....
free. He never had a choice about telling him mom, telling someone he
trusted on his own felt...empowering.

"So ..... You're ok with me being you know?" Sam asked

"Gay dude, it's gay. It's not a bad word. And yeah I'm fine with it, I've
known for a while" He told Sam.

"How?"Sam asked. He didn't understand, he thought he was being careful.

"Come on we've been friends since like the beginning" He looked at Sam with
a smile "I saw the way you looked at Jake. Every time he's near, your eyes
sparkle to life."

Sam scuttled over and pulled Mark into a strong embrace. "Thanks" was all he
managed to squeeze out before the tears flowed again but this time they were
happy tears.

"So.....Are you going to tell me what's wrong now or what?" Mark asked.
"It's like your heart isn't in it anymore."

Sam stiffened in Mark's arms, he struggled to get of his arms but Mark held
on tight.

"I pushed him away" Sam whispered.

"Pushed who away?"Mark inquired.

Sam began to fight harder to get away but Mark wouldn't let go. Mark knew if
he let go that Sam would run and end up hurting himself.

"Shhh, it's going to be alright. Who buddy?" Mark whispered to Sam.

Finally it was like the power drained from Sam, he stopped struggling, he
just lay limp in Mark's arms.

"Jacob" Sam whispered out just before his sobbing starting again.

"It's .....all...... my fault" he continued.

Mark continued to hold him and just let him cry, he started to rub Sam's
back in circular motions just like his mother used to for him when he was
really upset.

Eventually Sam's sobs subsided then stopped but still they sat there in
their own world. Finally Mark broke the deafening silence.

"It's not" he told Sam.

"It is!" Sam stated back.

"It's not your fault Sam!" Mark said forcefully.

"But it is, I pushed him away, I hurt him." Sam said

Mark brought his hand up to Sam's chin and used his finger tips to tilt
Sam's head so they were looking eye to eye.

"We all make mistakes, it's only our fault if we give up on trying to fix
them" Mark said knowingly.

Mark hadn't noticed it before but there was blood on his forearm. He hadn't
felt a pain of a cut.

"We gotta get up buddy, I think I hurt myself somehow. I need to clean it in
the bathroom."

Mark slowly stood up, pulling Sam up with him. Mark had to drag Sam with him
just to get to the bathroom, he was afraid to let go and leave Sam there
alone.  Somewhere in his head there was a voice telling him that it was not
wise to leave him.

He finally managed to wash the blood off of his forearm but there was not a
big enough wound to produce that much blood, just nicks and shallow cuts. He
realized that the blood wasn't his, it was Sam's. There were pieces of glass
imbedded in the back of Sam's arm just above the elbow. When they were
struggling on the floor the blood must have transferred over to Mark's arm.

"Sam?" Mark asked

"Are you okay?" Sam asked, finally pulled out of his daze by seeing the
blood.

"I'm fine, let me see your arm" Mark said reaching for Sam's arm.

Sam was shocked to see glass in his arm, he hadn't felt anything. Seeing the
glass though brought the pain forward. It was like a thousand little needles
stabbing him all at once. He just stood there and watched and winced as Mark
pulled the pieces out one by one with a pair of tweezers that he had found
among some bandages in a drawer.

His arm wrapped in bandages would eventually heal but both Sam and Mark were
still trying to figure out where the glass had come from. All cleaned up,
they both left the bathroom and walked down the hall where they were. Lying
broken was a picture, glass everywhere along with blood. Sam bent down and
picked up the picture. It was the one he was looking at earlier.

Tears welled up in his eyes, it was as broken as he felt. Mark looked over
and saw a tear escape from Sam's eye.

"It's ok, we'll get it fixed. You're lucky that the glass hadn't gone too
deep you know." Mark stated

Sam just nodded his head in agreement, scared that if he'd open his mouth
all control would be lost and he'd start sobbing all over again.

Mark reached over and took the picture frame from Sam's hands. He pulled the
picture out, surprisingly it was undamaged. He handed Sam the picture.

"Go put that someplace safe, I'm going to toss the frame before someone gets
hurt again." Mark said.

Mark stood there and watched as Sam walked to his room to put the picture
away before walking to the kitchen to throw the frame out. He felt really
bad for Sam, he just didn't have the life in him right at the moment.

He found a box and placed the frame in it, taped it up and threw it in the
garbage. He was quite familiar where everything was, he practically grew up
in this house. After he was finished he wandered back up to Sam's room.

Sam's door was shut so he knocked but received no answer. He turned the knob
and walked in. The room was pitch dark, the window covered and the lights
off. Mark flicked the light on, Sam was curled up into a ball on his bed,
and he was crying.

Mark sat down on the bed right beside Sam's curled figure. He placed a
comforting hand on Sam's shoulder.

"He's gone for good" Sam whimpered.

 "How do you know that?"Mark asked

"Because I broke up with him" Sam said with deep hatred for himself.

"Have you tried to apologize and maybe told him why you did it? Mark asked

Sam shifted on the bed, uncurling and turning and looking at Mark. He sat up
and slid beside Mark.

"I tried to apologize but it didn't do me any good, he wouldn't listen. He
told me that we had to work at being friends before anything else. "Sam
said.

"Well it seems like you weren't listening. He never said it was over and
done with, he just told you that you  guys had to start over and work back
up to where you were. I think that what he's asking is understandable, he's
giving you a second chance." Mark stated

Tears started to fall again but this time Sam wore a smile as the tears
fell.

"I'm a total idiot. A second chance, I wouldn't have realized that without
you." Sam said

"You're not an idiot, just a bit slow sometimes" Mark said with a smile.

Sam stood up and walked to the door. Disappearing into the hallway without a
word, Mark got up and followed behind. Still no words, Mark watched as Sam
sat on the steps by the front door and put on his shoes. Finally Mark
decided to break the silence and ask Sam what he was up to.

"Where are you going?" Mark asked. Mark put on his shoes too, intended to
follow even if Sam didn't tell him.

"I'm going to see if he went back home or if his father has seen him." Sam
stated.

Sam opened the door and walked outside, Mark continued to follow. They
locked up and Mark offered to give Sam a ride over, hoping to help the best
he could.

***	***	***

Jake had spent the whole day handing out resumes, he needed a job, he needed
to get out of Sam's house. He felt like a prisoner, but he knew that he
couldn't go back to his father. Jake wouldn't survive another round of his
father's 'lessons'.

Jake walked into the house, exhausted, handing out resumes was stressful. He
had gotten a few 'Thank you' and a few 'Call you' but no solid 'You got the
job'.

He could hear that Sam was home, Sam had his music blaring from his room. He
took off his shoes and climbed the few stairs. He walked down to his room,
he saw that Sam's door was shut again. It had become a common thing since
the break up. It was like he was shutting Jake out and it hurt him.

He was tempted to go over and open his door and ask him why he was being
such a jerk but he stopped himself and turned and went into his room. What
he saw sitting on his bed made him want to walk back out that door and burst
into Sam's room and ask him what the hell he was thinking.  He took back his
thought earlier, Sam wasn't being a jerk just a stupid moron.

Sitting on his bed was everything he owned. There were clothes, books even
his cd collection. One or two cds were missing but that was it. It was stuff
that he had left at his, no his father's house. It shouldn't be there, it
couldn't be there but it was.

He walked over and looked at everything, tears sprang to his eyes, He
expected never to see this stuff ever again and here it was. He favourite
shirt, which Sam had bought him was there and so was his favourite cd, A
Cursive Memory Let Love In.

He put the stuff back on the bed and then went and tried to open Sam's door,
knowing no amount of knocking would get his attention but his door was
locked. Finding Sam's door locked was more of a shock than actually finding
his stuff. It just reinforced the idea in his head that he was being shut
out by Sam.

Somewhat defeated at the moment, he went into his room and grabbed Let Love
in and took it to the living room to listen to because he doesn't have a
stereo in his room.  He just sits there as Dream Away plays. A few songs
later he heard the front door open and the sound of Rebecca, Sam's mother
coming in.

He got up and turned the stereo off and walked into the kitchen. He knew her
routine down to the letter now, she always headed straight for the kitchen
to drop off her lunch bag on the counter and so she could grab a drink.

Jake came in just as she was pouring a glass of wine, she always said it
helps unwind her from a busy day.

"Hey, how was your day kiddo?" She asked taking a sip of her wine.

"Good, got quite the shocker when I got home though" Jake stated to her.

Rebecca took a seat at the kitchen table and Jake grabbed a glass and filled
it with water then joined her at the table.

"Nothing bad I hope or I'll ground him for good I swear" She said

Jake let out a small laugh. "No it was good, stupid but good" He said

"I found everything from my Dad's in my room, stacked on the bed. It was
stupid because my Dad is dangerous." he continued.

He picked up his glass and gulped down the water, afraid to think of what
Sam did to get his stuff back. The gesture made Jake's heart jump but it had
been too risky. Sam could have ended up in the hospital like Jake had and
that would've been horrifying just for a few items.

"Have you talked to him about it?" she asks and he shakes his head no in
answer.

"Well then I'll go get him so we can talk about it" she continued, got up
and walked out of the kitchen.

A few minutes later the music stopped and you could hear faintly what
Rebecca was saying but not Sam's reply. She walked back into the kitchen and
sat back down in her seat.

"He said he'd be here in a second" she said with a smile.

Jake didn't understand how she got Sam's attention and so quickly, he just
chalked it up to her motherly ways.

Her back was to the doorway so Jake saw him first. He was shocked, pissed
off and kind of worried looking at Sam.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Jake asked standing up quickly from the
table.



/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Thanks guys for the emails, really appreciated them :)
I know I took quite a bit of time to write this, hope you enjoy it.
It'll get more interesting in the next few chapters.
Thanks Jim, Mark, Frank, Robert and Jay, just to name a few of the great
people who emailed me. I hope to hear from you guys again.