Date: Tue, 12 Jul 2011 19:51:08 -0700 (PDT)
From: Kiddo Xavier <discreetlyweird@yahoo.com>
Subject: Out of Rhythm Part 7: Changing something Unchangeable P2

Out of Rhythm Part 7: Changing something Unchangeable P2

-Floren

@Xander's party

I spotted Xander's smooth blonde face in his loose t-shirt as he bounced
along to the beat with Brittany. Kyrian was with Samantha making out like
teenagers do. Samantha was a hot looking girl ....if only I was
straight. She had long curly blonde hair and piercing eyes, but no one
could beat 'my Xander' in the looks department. Yes, he had my attention
from the very start. I adored him in every way; he was a perfect piece of
art.  When we kissed, the very instant he touched those full pink lips to
mine, I almost melted. He was too good to be true. It felt awkward though
because Renz was there when it happened, but it was Xander's way of moving
on and I was a willing participant.

I just fell hard for him when we kissed and I wanted explore that feeling
and for it to mean something, but most importantly I wanted him want me
back. I had no regrets of leaving my old school and transferring to
St. Mark.  And as the days pass I just fall more and more in love with this
guy. And tonight, before this party ends, I'm going ask him to be my
boyfriend. He deserves a better person than that Renz guy, and that better
person is me.

-Brittany
 Xander and I got pretty wasted after a few too many shots. We rocked like
crazed lunatics on the floor; we danced to the beat like the world depended
on it. Xander looked hot, not that I'm saying he was not before, the truth
is I liked how he looked before more than I do his current style.  We were
having so much fun but I felt a little tired from the dancing.

"Hey Xander, I don't feel good I'll get something to drink okay." I said.

"Okay but don't go too far you might get raped." He said winking at me. I
could tell from the crazy warning that he was totally wasted. As I made my
way to where Kyrian, Floren and Samantha were, a hot looking stud got in my
way.

"Long time no see hot chick." He said. I couldn't believe what I was
seeing.

"Chester? Oh- my- god!" I shouted as jumped up on him and bear hugged him
tightly,

"Whoa, I just got here and you're going to kill me." He chuckled.

I punched him on his arms when we parted. "Why didn't you tell me you were
coming? You left like I was nothing to you, now here you are coming back
like nothing happened and----" He kissed me cutting off my runt.

I kissed him back as he grabbed my cheeks. He pulled back, looked into my
eyes and said "Hey, I didn't really mean it when I broke up with you, I
thought I could live without you, but I can't all this time in Florida was
just a test to see if I could stay away from you, clearly I can't. So I
came back to you and I want to make it up to you."

I pulled a smug look on my face then hit him in his gut. As expected he
cringed and doubled over. He left me here because he's parents wanted him
to study in Florida and it so sweet of him to come back because of me. I
fought of a smile.

"God I miss that punch." He said wincing then chuckling. I always loved his
straight chestnut hair and but the cream of the cake were his playful
crystal blue eyes, there were moments when I could lose myself looking into
them.

 "You think I'll make it easy for you" I asked raising an eyebrow. "You
better be ready boy, for it will be a bumpy ride for you. Now start your
penance and go get me a drink." I ordered winking at him.

He fixed his composure and smiled at me. I crossed my arms. Gosh he was
more toned than before, one could see the trace of his broad pecs and
chiselled abs, god how I missed his body.

"As you wish ma'am" Chester smiled flashing me his dimples then he turned
to get my drink. I walked to our table blushing. I was definitely going to
make it hard for him. I couldn't help smiling to myself thinking of how
much fun I was going to have at his expense.....


-Xander

"Hey Kid!" Jeff greeted. "Wow Jeffy!" I said hugging him.

"Whoa you really are tipsy" He said. I then grabbed a shot from a passing
crew but before I could take a sip he took it away. "Okay, I know It's your
birthday but don't want you to get in any trouble, so no more shots for
you" He said. "Oh and by the way I like your new look" He added.

I made a face. He laughed. "Here, Happy Birthday" He handed me a box. I
looked at it and it was a costly watch. I looked at him in amusement. "Hey
Jeff this is a little pricey and--"

"Eh...." He cut me short by raising a finger. "You know how important you
are to us; you're like a son to me, so please don't complain okay?"

I smiled then pulled him in for a big hug. I wished he was my father.

"Thanks." I said. "Okay now, go and have fun but stay away from trouble." I
nodded then got back to the floor. Almost all of the people were wild on
the dance floor just like I was. I wondered if most of them just like I
were here tonight to get rid of pain, after all pain is universal right? I
took another shot from the passing crew but almost immediately someone grab
my hand again before I could sip it.

"What now Jeff---" I started to complain but stopped when i realised that
the offending hand was Renz's.

"You'll get drunk." Renz said sounding a little upset. I retracted my hand,
looked him in the eye and drank it.

 "Hey you made it " I feigned excitement knowing I wished he hadn't. He
handed me a box. I stared at it for a moment. "I wanted to keep my promise"
He said it with the most pleading voice I have ever heard. I felt like my
chest was going to explode again. I took a calming breath, took the box and
immediately put it in my pocket, not bothering to look at it. "Thanks." I
said smiling at his frowning face, with an enthusiasm that I didn't feel.

Trisha was on him in an instant hugging him he didn't hugged her back
though. "Happy birthday Xander" Trisha said. "It's a shame I wasn't able to
get you a gift."

"No it's okay." I said. "Come on; let's go to our table."

We walked through the crowd to get to our table. Floren was looking at me
while Kyrian was there with his so called 'friend' Samantha. And there were
my other friends who happened to be not so close to me, but friends of mine
nonetheless. Brittany was with this guy I had never seen before.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked rudely, I blame the alcohol for making me
loose tongued and rude. "I'm sorry I didn't mean that, my bad am tipsy you
know."

Everyone at the table chuckled; the stud stood up then offered his hand to
me. "I'm Chester man, Brit's boyfriend." "Ex." Brit corrected. "Not for
long" he said smiling at her.

Damn, he's so sexy. I thought while I grabbed his hand and shook
it. "Xander... and this is Renz and Trisha and ..." I quickly introduced
everyone else to him. He shook hands with everyone, and then we all settled
down. It was apparent that most of us were tired from all the dancing and
drinking

I stood up raising my hands. "Hey who wants to play spin the bottle" I
shouted. Everyone at our table cheered. "Let's spin the bottle, Spin the
bottle." I'm about to heat things up. I looked Renz and noted that he
looked back concerned.....

hehehe this was too easy I was about to start my plan......

 -Renz

The game turned out to be cool. A person would spin the bottle and
whichever two people it pointed to would have to kiss each other. A random
guy spun the bottle and it pointed to Brittany. They kissed with the tongue
and everyone cheered The Chester guy looked uneasy. It spun a couple of
time then it was Kyrian turn, the bottle pointed at random girl. They
kissed for a little while and everyone laughed. I kept looking at Xander
who was laughing really hard. His face was all pink from the alcohol but
even then he was still so cute, I wanted him to be mine.

Why didn't he even look at my gift? It was like it didn't mean anything to
him. I wondered silently. Soon it was my turn so I spun the bottle wishing
it would point at Xander. He was quiet as the bottle kept spinning. At
first it looked like it would come to a stop pointing at him, my heart was
pounding, but, it stopped at Kyrian's girl who was beside Xander. I felt so
disappointed.

"Renz! Renz !" Trisha cheered rather loudly. I kissed the girl lightly
without any affection. True to habit I closed my eyes and immediately
imagined the lips were Xander's. It was so good to have his lips on mine
again. I kissed hard and even used my tongue, just like I imagined I would
kiss Xander, abruptly I heard wild cheers and the noise snapped out my
reverie. Disappointedly I opened my eyes and realised it was not Xander'
that i had kissed, I looked at him, uncertain of his reaction, he looked
right back ata me with a smug look on his face; like I was daring him to
upstage me. I looked away with an unsettling feeling down my stomach.

"My turn!" Floren announced. He spun the bottle and it stopped pointing at
Xander. "Oh!!!!" everyone yelled. Xander stood up then leaned towards
Floren's face. I was past bothered, i was disturbed; they kiss hard and
without restraint. I watched as their tongue battle for domination. People
around me laughed and cheered, while I felt like my blood was boiling in my
veins.  I struggled to fight the urge to punch this Floren guy. He was
messing with 'my Xander' and I would be damned if I did not fight for what
was mine. They made out for what seemed like an hour then parted. Xander
looked at me with haughtiness. I looked down and away from him; I did not
want him to see how hurt I was. More spinning and kissing happened and then
It was Xander's turn..........

"Yeah you go birthday boy!" I heard Kyrian cheer.

He spun the bottle and I hoped that it would point at me. It was about to
stop pointing at me , my heart was beating hard with anticipation and the
expectation that I would get to kiss Xander better than that Floren guy
ever could, but the bottle still had momentum from the spinning and it
moved slightly and came to a dead stop........ pointing at Trisha.

-Xander

Perfect, this is what I wanted to happen, my plan was coming along rather
effortlessly.

"You can finally kiss a girl!" A random guy exclaimed, the comment prompted
laughter. Trisha stood up and leaned over the table in my direction. I
didn't bother to look at Renz; I knew I had his full attention. I counted
on making him jealous or at the very least angry at watching me kiss his
girlfriend, I really did not care which emotion he felt, as long as it was
an ugly emotion that hurt him as much as he hurt me. Ooh I was going to
make this kiss a show stopper.....

"Xander Hummelford, I'm gonna rock your world" She said asI leaned in for a
kiss. She kissed me back; I gave her a wet kiss as I let my tongue enter
her mouth holding her face in place to perfect the assault, she responded
by moaning in satisfaction. I wanted it to last so that Renz could both
feel and see the anguish of having someone fool around with your loved
one. I intensified my lip locked assault, and Trisha played right along
with my plan by not backing away.

Next thing I know, something crashed on my jaw making me fall down. Not so
long after, I realized that Renz had swung his fist ball onto my
face. Kyrian was in between us acting anxious. "Dude what the hell is wrong
with you!" Kyrian practically yelled pushing him back. Brit and Floren were
instantly at my side. And due to all the commotion we started to get
people's attention.

"Come on, I've got your back." I heard Floren saying as he helped me
stand. "God you're bleeding, I'll go get some ice." I heard Brittany say I
was too flustered to open my eyes, too disoriented. And if I'm not
mistaken, Renz stormed out soon after and Trisha had followed him. Great!
Now he was hurting, which was my exact intention?.. Well I was hurt too.

But I was not done with him, not by a long shot. By the time I would be
done with him, he would know pain, and I knew what pain was, after all I
learned from the best, him, didn't I?

******

Floren and I were in his car and was he pressing ice on my bruised jaw and
lips, it really hurt. The others were inside probably talking to amongst
themselves about the incident; I promised the kiss would be a show stopper,
so I guess I was right. Too bad the alcohol was starting ware off because
my pain from the blow was doubling.

"He really hit you hard, didn't he" floren asked softly

I didn't respond, inside I was thinking that Renz was a real jerk. I guess
he couldn't take as good as he gave. I held Floren's hand still in order to
take the ice. "I'm okay now." I said. "Thanks." I was about to get out of
his car when he suddenly grabbed me?.

"I love you" He blurted out. I was taken aback by his words. "What!" I said
in confusion.

He leaned in closer and held both my hands. "Xander I want to be with you,
and to take care of you. You are such a beautiful person and you deserve
someone to love you with their very best I know this are all happening too
fast but that's how I feel about you. You're the only one that makes me
feel like this and when you kissed me, it only confirmed my feelings for
you."

"I don't know what to say" I said still confused by his proclamation.

"You don't have to say anything; you don't have to love me back at least
not yet. I just want you to open your heart and let me prove that I'm a
better person to love you." I stared at his love tinted brown eyes as he
leaned forward. His lips touched mine and I don't why I kissed him
back. His lips were so soft I thought I would as I let hurt them with my
tongue. He held my cheeks then kissed me harder. I don't know why I did not
stop him; maybe it was because the kiss was stirring a burning in my
chest. He then trailed his lips on to my neck and started to suck on it. He
moved his hand on my flat muscled stomach and ripped my shirt off and I did
the same to him. My cock is swelling, he pushed me on to the seat and then
started to suck on my nipple as he groped my crotch and massaged the lump,
it felt so damn good. I grabbed his head back to my lips and kissed him
again. That made him aggressive making me almost suffocate from the
intensity of his kiss. He then unbuckled my belt, unzipped me and took out
my now hard cock. I was moaning in pleasure.  I was shocked when suddenly
he dove his mouth on it reaching my pubes on one try.  It was amazing that
he deep-throated me in just a one single move.

 "Ahhh!" I exclaimed.

He was bobbing on me up and down and I was meeting him with thrusts of my
own. I was rubbing his head when he looked up suddenly remembered all the
anguish that Renz had put me through.

"Floren wait!" I said stopping him. "I can't do this."

I zipped up my pants and put my shirt on. He was staring at me; his eyes
displayed his tormented feeling. I touched his cheek

"Is it because of Renz?" He asked in a hurtful voice.

"No." I lied.

"Then why?" I held his hands then stared at his watery grey eyes. "It's
because I am still hurt and letting someone in, when one has unresolved
baggage, is a bad ideaI. "I'm broken floren" I said and gently kissed his
forehead, I am still broken and I have to heal first before I can let you
in. I like you but am not ready for this. I want to put myself first for
once so I can heal and move on, you understand right?

He lay his head on my shoulder, exhaled and said "I do, In a way I do
understand, but want you to know that I'm always here for you......waiting
for you."

"You're a great person and I know someday you'll be happy."

"I agree, that day will be when we are together." He quipped. We both
laughed.

"So can we go back to the others?" He nodded then got back inside.....

*******

Days passed and Renz and I never talked again after the incident. I
acknowlge his presence, even if he was often times a few feet from me. I
knew he wanted to apologize but chickened out many times. From the few
times I would sneak glances at him, he looked and acted like everything was
perfect in his life, this left me chocked up since he turned mine inside
out. But the worst part is, I can't change my feelings for him, it just
seemed to strengthen, never fading, bitter sweet. My mind wanted to let go
but my heart kept holding on. This inner conflict ensured that I kept my
distance from him.

The saddest part of all was I had finally realised my planned revenge was
pointless. The plan did not soothe my brokenness, mater of fact it got me
physically assaulted; more pain for me. It was really silly of me trying to
circumvent the natural order of things; I wonder what made me think I could
change the unchangeable. Renz was living his perfect life and I was
languishing with this deep seated feels for him. Nothing was going to
change this, I know realise what a fool I have been fighting the
inevitable.... So am going to stop fighting and accept my circumstance

-Renz

I cannot face him, not after I physically hurt him. I just made everything
worse.  I really didn't want to hurt him; I was overwhelmed with jealousy
and wanted them to separate. I know violence has no excuse, but it was a
knee-jerk reaction, I didn't think about what I was doing, I just lashed
out and the next thing I know 'My Xander is on the floor. When we are at
class I often time stare at his perfect and wonder why the part of his body
I love the most. As the days go by I'm finding that getting more and more
into him.

Trisha passed by me, not even acknowledging me.

"Hey Trisha can we talk" I asked rushing after her.

"For what" She snapped. "You have no business with me and I am just so over
you." She then rudely brushed off my arm that is placed on her shoulder. I
never wanted to hurt Trisha but I can't be with her either, I loved another
person and being with her wasn't just right anymore. I had to be true to
myself and if that meant we had to server ties...Well so be it.

*flashback

"Why? Did I do something wrong?" Her eyes were teary.

"Nothing It's not you it's me. I love someone else and being with you just
doesn't make feel right."

"But I love you and you love me" She said tearing up some more.

 "I do love you Trisha, but not the kind of love you are referring to, it's
better that we became friends we have a lot in common and your such a sweet
person." I said putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

She moved away. "Yeah who would have thought that being so fluid would make
you so stupid?"

 "I'm sorry Trisha" I tried to hug her but she pushed me off.

 "Get off me."She said then stormed off.

I sat on the floor where my locker was and started to think of him. I
really missed his smiles when he talked to me. My life was just not
complete without Xander.

I suddenly felt someone sink down beside me. Without looking up I knew it
was him. I knew this because my pulse accelerated and my chest seemed to
tighten

"Hey." I said in a low voice.

"Hey." He smiled looking down.

"Look, I'm sorry what happened atthe party, it will never happened again. I
was a jerk and---"

"No it's okay." He cut me off in a mild tone.  "I would have done the same
thing if I were you. I just want to ease the tension between us and move
on." He then looked at me with those deep brown eyes. "I want us to be
friends; I'm tired of pushing people away and hiding my frustrations. I
cannot be at peace if I keep my frustrations bottled up inside. So let
by-gone be by-gone right?

I touched his cheeks; he was just as perfect as always. I leaned towards
him without thinking about it"I'm dating Floren now." He hastly informed
me, and then he stood up and walked away. I watched as he walked away from
me, leaving my heart to shutter in what seemed like a million pieces.