Date: Fri, 22 Mar 2002 17:00:24 -0800
From: Payne Iwanna <devils69me@hotmail.com>
Subject: Randy and Me - Chapter One

Chapter One: The Note

	It was the first day after spring break ended and everyone was not too
happy to be back.  I had Theatre first period.  The teacher was droning on
and on about lighting a stage and the different types of lights used in
theatre so I just kind of spaced out.   Before I knew my gaze had wandered
on to him.  Randy Thomas.  I had had a crush on Randy since I first laid
eyes on him at the beginning of freshman year.  He was one of the school
potheads, but he was funny and not to mention really cute!  He was about 5'6
1/2", had red brown hair, and the most amazing blue/green/gray eyes.  He
lifted weights before and during strength at school and so he was easily
159-170 pounds of all muscle.  We had gone through a lot of flirting
throughout the year (at least that is what I thought) and during spring
break I had made up my mind to have someone tell Randy that I liked him.
You see, I was a very out person.  I wasn't an over feminine homosexual, but
feminine enough for most people to figure out that I was gay.  I had even
told a number of people about me, so pretty much the entire school knew.
But even so, I couldn't bring myself to tell Randy that I liked him.  I was
pretty sure that Randy wouldn't do anything rash like kick my ass, but if he
just shut me down I don't think I would have taken it so well.  That is why
I wrote this note to Crystal.  It said:

Dear Krys,
	Hey chik, wuz up? Not shiznit here.  I have a REALLY big favor to ask you.
Well, you know how I like Randy Thomas right?  Well, since you went out with
him at one point (at least that's what I heard) I was kind of wondering if
you could tell him something for me.  I was wondering if you would tell him
that I liked him.  But only he can know.  I mean...  I don't know what I
mean.  You're probably wondering why I am asking you to do this instead of
me doing it myself, right?  Well, I'm just not the best person to tell my
innermost feelings to someone especially if it has to do with them.
	I wouldn't be asking you this unless I really wanted him to know.  I don't
know why I want him to know but I just have this feeling that I should tell
someone that I like that I like them. And well out of Josh, Trent, and
Randy, I just figured that Randy would be the safest person to tell
	Anyway I am going to let you go now but I will catch you later, -k-?
			Love always,
				Danny
	P.S. PLEASE don't let anyone else see this letter please.  Thanks.

	When I gave that letter to Krystal I just said that I had to go to class
and I left to Theatre.  I was anxious about her telling Randy that I liked
him, but I forced myself to calm down.  Randy was just sitting there staring
off into space when he turned around and looked at me.  His eyes always had
this tired looking happiness in them whenever he was stoned.  That's what
was in there now.  He smiled then as he turned back around when the teacher
handed him his weekly grade report from the week before we left for spring
break.  I wanted to just go over to him and tell him what I felt and take
him into my arms and kiss those sweet tender lips, but I remained in my seat
like a good boy and waited for the bell to ring.  Finally, after what seemed
like an eternity, the passing bell rang.  Onto Health, which I also had with
Randy.  I got into the commons area and saw Krystal.  She just saw me and
smiled and then walked back behind me right to Randy's side.  I didn't want
to be around when she told him so I hurriedly ran down to the Health room.
I got there and put my backpack under the stairs and almost ran into the
teacher as I got into the classroom.

	"Slow down Danny," Mrs. Jackson said to me with a stern tone of voice.

	"Yes ma'am," I replied with a bit of an embarrassed look on my face.

	I took my seat in the back left-hand corner of the room just as Randy came
in the door.  He looked around and finally saw me I tried to look away, but
there was just something in him that I couldn't pull away from.  He smiled
at me then.  I finally was able to look away but not without a shy smile on
my face.  I couldn't believe it! I was absolutely positive that Krystal had
told Randy that I liked him and he was still smiling at me!
	I became too busy thinking about Randy to realize that Mrs. Jackson was
standing right in front of me and waiting for me to answer some question.

	"Danny.  Danny.  DANNY!!!"

	"Huh? Oh, umm yes Mrs. Jackson?" was all that managed to make it out of my
mouth.

	"So nice of you to join the real world Mr. James.  Now will you answer my
question?  What causes the male erection?"

	I almost busted out laughing right then just because I had been thinking
about Randy the whole period pretty much.

	"Umm.... It's some form of stimuli that causes the blood to rush to the
penis thereby causing it to enlarge and stiffen."

	"Correct.  Now if you please would you remain alert throughout the rest of
the period?"

	"Yes ma'am."

	There were hushed giggles from around the room as the teacher walked back
to the podium.  The rest of the period seemed to fly by and I still didn't
hear a word that the teacher said.  As I got up my friend Michael came over
and asked me if everything was okay.

	"Of course.  I was just a little... preoccupied today," was my response.

	I couldn't keep myself from grinning as I thought of what had caused my
preoccupation.  I went under the stairs to get my backpack and he is there.
Randy.  I get kind of sheepish all of the sudden and say hi.  He gives me
one of those dazzling smiles of his and I can barely take my eyes off of
him.  But, I overcome my weakness and pick up my backpack.  Just at that
moment he reaches over and touches me with just the tips of his fingers.  I
got up and looked into hi eyes.  In that moment I knew that I wanted to be
with him forever.  I started to say something but Randy just put one finger
ever so gently upon my lips and motioned me to walk to class with him.  Our
classes were right next to each other so we got there and I took one last
look at him and walked into the classroom.
	I was late of course, but that didn't matter because I had first lunch
period today so I just had to walk to lunch from class.  I got in line and
grabbed my lunch tray. Oh yay, we're having "Char Burgers" today. Our
school's lame excuse for a hamburger. I didn't really care about that though
I was still in shock about what had happened earlier.  I walked towards my
normal lunch table when Josh Foster bumped into me.  Josh was soooo cute.
He was about 5'8", 148lbs, just past shoulder length dark brown hair, deep
blue green eyes and even though he was kind of skinny he was really
muscular.

	"Whoa, dude, sorry. Guess I have to watch where I'm going'. See you later
dude."

	That was all that Josh said, but I was shocked that he said even that to me
because most people in the school either don't like me or just won't talk to
me.  I sat down at my table and Nancy started to blab to everyone about her
Algebra test that she had this period.  I finished eating before everyone
else and dumped my tray.  I couldn't stop thinking about Randy.  I wanted to
see him again so bad, and I mean, I know I can see him from my table because
he is only a few tables away, but then it would seem like I was stalking him
or something and I didn't want to scare Randy away.  I just went into the
bathroom into one of the stalls and started to cry.  Not loudly, but just
enough to get my feelings out.
	There was a knock on the stall door and someone tried to open it.  I
thought to myself oh shit, I'm going to get caught crying in the boys'
bathroom!

	"Danny, it's me. Let me in please."

	I would know that voice anywhere.  It was Randy wanting to come in.  What
else could I do?  I unlocked the door and let him in.

	"Dude, what's wrong? Are you okay? Come on, talk to me please," was the
first thing that Randy asked me when he saw my tear stricken face and my
blood shot eyes.
	"Nothing, I'm fine. Really I am," was my lame reply.

	"Danny, If we're going to be in a relationship then you have to trust me.
Come on, tell me what's wrong."

	I was shocked to hear him say that word "relationship" said in the same
sentence as "we're".  I couldn't say anything.  I just looked into his eyes
and tried to keep the tears from coming out. Finally I spoke to him.

	"I just... I just can't believe that you ...  I don't understand how
someone like you could ever have feelings for someone like me.  I'm just so
happy and confused and ... and... Oh I don't know what I am.

	"Danny, Danny, Danny.  Oh, Danny.  How could you not think that someone
could love you?  You're wonderful."

	With that last word he leaned forward and pressed his soft lips against
mine. So strong and yet so soft.
	Just at that moment the bell rang.  One last longing look and Randy was
gone, out the door and onto class.  I sat there for a couple of minutes in
quiet shock.  Then I brought myself back to reality and realized that I was
going to be late for class.