Date: Mon, 09 Dec 2002 09:41:54 -0600
From: Michael Yost <myost@charter.net>
Subject: Re: Real World Chapter three

"Brent. I don't want a fuck buddy. A fuck buddy who doesn't expect me to
tell him he's special every night.  Someone I spend nights fucking, and
then after we have a light conversation we go our separate ways.  I want
more than just a good friend and a good lay.  I want someone who is my
night and day. Someone I'm passionate about.  Someone I know I can stay
faithful to for the rest of my life, not because I have to for the kids'
sake, but because I know there isn't anyone I'd rather be with. Finding a
good lay is easy.  I can even pay for a good lay.  Finding someone like
Pete.  Some people are never that lucky."

"Have you heard from Trisha and Jesus at all about how they want to handle
custody of the kids?"

"No, Trisha has completely abandoned them.  Daniel and Damion want to raise
them with my help."

"I think you should wait a while until Ace learns to like Pete better. At
the moment Ace can barely stand the sight of him."

"Ace can spot a mile away someone who will make him eat his spinach and put
his toys away.  I almost broke up with Pete because of Ace," Josh said
moodily, "It was the hardest twenty-four hours of my life.  I asked out
this girl.  There was always this sexual tension between her and me.  The
moment I got off the phone after asking her out I broke down and cried. I
was so depressed. You know when I first knew I really liked Pete?"

"The first time you saw him naked?"

"No, you pervert," Josh said, "It was when I asked him to make me a grilled
cheese sandwich. I was busy with homework. I was just kidding around when I
asked him to make me a sandwich.  I was surprised when he made me one.  And
when he gave it to me, I so was disappointed.  He only used one slice of
cheese, and he didn't butter the inside of the bread.  It was crispy, not
soggy.  He didn't use enough blood."

"Right," Brent said, rolling his eyes, "You really put ketchup on your
grilled cheese sandwich?  I guess you must.  You're always putting that
smelly, watery ketchup in all your food."

"I use it all the time.  I kind of made a face at the sandwich.  He asked
me didn't I like it. And I was honest with him. I was all tense. I thought
he was going to scream at me to make my own fucking cheese sandwich.  I
thought he was going to ball it up and throw it at me. And I would never
see him again.  You know what he did instead?"

"Smeared the sandwich all over your naked chest, licking it off of you."

"No," Josh smiled "Pete did the next best thing.  Pete shrugged his
shoulders, and he made me another one.  Trisha or my mom would have clawed
my eyes out.  I almost was ready to brawl my eyes out before he came back
from making me another sandwich.  I knew I finally found someone I could
trust completely.  Someone I could be honest with, and he wouldn't put me
down.  I never had that with anyone except for Daniel and Damion.  My
mother died.  Life with her was pretty abusive.  Even through I know she
loved me.  She was a hate filled drunk most of the time.  Nothing I did
pleased her except when I got drunk with her.  Then she thought I was cute.
Pete showed me some photographs he had taken at Saint Louis' cemetery.  We
found something else we have in common, We both love photography.  I was
all choked up, and ever since then it's been real."

"Let's see to get a guy to fall in love with me I have to make him a crummy
cheese sandwich. Then I have to cook one more this one being more to his
liking without being a bitch about it.  And here I thought being drop dead
sexy is enough."

"To get a guy to fall in love with you, you have to accept what he's like
when his guard is down," Josh teased.

"Looks help too," Brent teased back, "And Pete isn't all that bad to look
at.  If you hadn't had seen him first I would have been all over the boy if
only for his sweet personality."

"I would have moved heaven and hell to steal him away from you friend, or
no friend," Josh teased, "I have no scruples where Pete is concerned.  Are
you going to be all right when I'm gone?  I mean seriously?  I 'm already
missing the kids, you, Damion, and Daniel, I can so back out of this."

"I'm not going to lose my control just because you're not around.  Stop
mothering me."

"Call me every night?"

"Josh!" Brent grumbled, hitting Josh lightly one the shoulder "You're
embarrassing me."

"Call me?" Josh said lightly, hiding his concern, "Please?  If you don't
I'll get home sick and I'll have a miserable time."

"Sure."

"Pucker up?" Josh teased.

"In your dreams, honey," Brent laughed.

"Just a little bit of your N'Orlean's sugar.  Come on," Josh said, his
tickling hands wandering over to Brent's ribs.

"Sure, but only because you were my first friend when I came out of the
closet.  You were the first friend of the real, and the most spectacular
Brent Evens."

Giving Josh a quick friendly kiss, Brent said, "If I don't call you; you
call me."

"Deal," Josh said, he didn't give his love away very often.  He was careful
about his feelings.  Once he did decide it was OK to love someone, he held
on to him or her.

"How does your parents feel about your being on "Real World"?"

"Daniel is excited for me.  Damion finally warmed up to the idea.  He's
been giving me little lectures every night about how I should make this
trip into an adventure by going to every art museum there is in Chicago.
He's been telling me about Chicago's history.  The blues, the gangsters.  I
love listening to his stories."

"So, he expects this to be an educational field trip of sorts," Brent
snorted.

"Yes," Josh said, laughing along with Brent, "He's even more excited about
my going to the University of New Orleans. Through, he's disappointed I
didn't try to get into a private, ivy league school.  He was whining about
the joys and wonders of attending Tulane University.  He's kind of over his
disappointment.  You should have seen Damion when we went to the campus
bookstore to buy books for my classes.  We ended up taking four huge bag
full of books home.  It was like setting loose a kid in a candy store with
his own credit card.  We had to go back to the bookstore after he and
Daniel took me out to dinner to get more books.  By the time we got home we
couldn't close the trunk.  It was so full of text books, novels, and art
supplies. I haven't seen Damion this happy in a long time," Josh said,
thinking wistfully, Louis is always happy around father.

"Did Les go with you?"

"God no!  He probably took his girl friend Dora out to an opera, or some
Christian lecture," Josh said.

"Les has a girl friend and he's living with your dads!  I mean excuse me,
but if I was lucky enough to be living with your dads, I mean the man is
gorgeous!  I can't believe how young your dads looks."

"He adopted me when he was twenty five and I was fifteen.  He has one of
those faces which never ages I guess," Josh said indifferently, "It isn't
love between Les and dads.  I don't think Les loves Dora or any one else.
I think Les keeps his lovers around so he can feel like some great
God.. The guy is major insecure, not to mention insincere."

"Damion and Les are in an open relationship that's all.  There must be
something worth while about Lestat to keep your dads going back to him."

"They're mutual, self destructive, life fucker uppers," Josh said lightly.

"Josh you don't mean that," Brent admonished him, "It's too bad your
parents broke up. But well, people do break up."

"I don't know.  I do know I do not want someone like Les in my life.  I
couldn't take what he and Damion put each other through.  Being together,
colossal fights, Les' constant cheating, breaking up, getting barely back
together.  Pardon the expression I need a human being in my life, not a
drug.  Not someone I'm addicted to, or who is addicted to hurting me," Josh
said moodily, "Daniel accepts me for who I am.  There is nothing I could do
to make Daniel love me less. With Damion his approval is a challenge.
Damion was so disappointed when Trisha didn't even go to high school. He
was devastated when she left the children.  I feel I have to make up for
the disappointments he had in life.  Be the son he wants me to be.  Make
him happy.  Because he gave me so much when he adopted me.  Disappointing
Damion is worse than disappointing myself."

"You didn't go to Tulane like he wanted."

"I would have if he had pushed me a little harder.  We talked it over.  I
explained to him I wanted to go to a public university where I would be
exposed to people with all sorts of backgrounds.  I'm going to be a free
lance photo journalist. What do I need a rich kid's playground for?"

"Celebrities, mentors, connections.  You'd have the finest professors money
can buy teaching you the ins and outs of career photo journalism.  Many who
were professional journalists themselves in another life. How would an ivy
league college look on your resume?  It would look fantastic.  And guys
going there look fantastic, too."

"Maybe when it's November I'll think about going to Tulane after December
if my dads brings it up again in a conversation. If it means that much to
him I'll go to Tulane.  Right now we both agreed the University of New
Orleans is fine," Josh said firmly.

"I wish you were giving to Harvard with me.  Screw taking pretty pictures.
Be a cut throat lawyer with me Josh."

"I cut enough throats," Josh said, smiling wickedly.

"Ya, I know cutting throats in your vampire novels has gotten you a fair
bundle of cash."

" I think that's why I got chosen to be part of the Read World cast. It
turns out one of the producers I interviewed with is a fan of my novels.
He had me sigh a copy of his first edition novel, "Anthony the Vampire".

"Was he cute?"

"He was married," Josh smirked. "I could tell by his discrete little
touches to my thigh and arm while we were talking, and his peeks at my
crotch, he has a wife only for show."

"His gaydar is working.  Closet banger.  Tell him he can look but he can't
paw."

"Can he droll?" Josh laughed,

"Only if he wears a bib," Brent teased, "Man, Chicago is so wasted on
you. If I was going I would be partying every night.  Meeting new talent.
Checking out those Midwestern cowboys.  Getting into interesting
situations.  And you're going to be celibate the whole time! Sometimes I
think Pete is nothing but a challenge to you like your dads."

TBC