Date: Thu, 29 Mar 2012 15:46:50 +0800
From: Ben Ng <ng.ben9@gmail.com>
Subject: Rick's Diary Part 13 - Am I Gay

Am I Gay?

That night, when I was on my bed trying to get to sleep, lots
of thoughts were in my head. A lot has happened today: I had a
threesome with Mike for the first time and I fucked Mike for
the first time as well. I even made him beg for it. I wondered
if I would get to fuck him again. That would be hot. But, more
importantly, I bonded with him not only on a physical level,
but on an emotional level as well. I really loved having him
around and I was growing attached to him. I wanted things to
stay like this forever, but I knew it wouldn't.

The next day, I woke up and went to class as usual. When I
came back from class, I was shocked at what I saw. Mike was
pushing a dildo up his ass. When he saw me, he immediately hid
it and covered himself up. His face was all red.

"Was that a dildo, Mike?"

"Yeah." He said softly.

"And you were shoving it up your ass?" He did not answer. He
just looked at me with an expression that was hard to
describe. It told me he was in conflict and was struggling to
come to terms with what he was doing. He was also ashamed of
using a dildo. He was ashamed that he liked being fucked, I
suppose.

"Am I gay?" He asked softly, sounding so confused.

"No, Mike, you are not. You love women too much to be gay."

"Then why do I like to shove things up my ass?"

"A lot of straight guys like to stimulate their prostate while
they jerk off too."

"Really?"

"Yeah, it's true."

"But if I want a cock up my ass, is that gay?"

"Well... that... does sound gay, but if you are sexually attracted
to women, then by definition you are not gay."

"Straight guys don't want cocks up their asses."

"Then may be you are bisexual." He looked even more confused
as I presented a third option.

"I am?"

"No, I don't think you are, but that's something for you to
find out. If you are sexually attracted to both men and women,
you are bisexual." Mike was deep in thought.

"Are you sexually attracted to men?" I asked.

"I'm attracted to the feeling of a warm cock filling me up and
probing my prostate."

"But not to men? As in... do you want to kiss them? Date them?
Marry them?"

"No. Hell no."

"Then you are not gay. You are 100% straight."

"Yeah?" He didn't sound convinced.

"Look, it was a new sensation. You just experienced how good
it felt to stimulate your prostate and you want to try it
again. It would go away soon, when the novelty is over." Mike
thought about it and seemed a bit relieved. He took out the
dildo and looked at it. Then he looked at me.

He looked straight at my cock. "A real cock would feel
better."

"You want me to fuck you again?" He nodded. He looked
embarrassed and ashamed to ask for it. It contradicted too
much to his idea of being straight. Yet he wanted it enough to
ask me, so he must be pretty desperate.

"Ok, why don't you lie on your back this time? It's more
comfortable that way." He nodded and lay on the bed. He was
already naked. I climbed on his bed and lubed up his ass. It
turned out he already lubed it before he used the dildo. I put
some lube on my cock. Since the dildo already opened him up,
it didn't take a lot of effort for me to enter him.

I liked this position because I can see Mike's face, chest and
cock when I fuck him. I liked to see his reaction as I shove
my cock in him, and I liked to play with his nipples and cock
as well. I looked into his eyes and asked if he's ready.

"I'm ready." He said softly. I pushed in. It entered easily
enough but both of us moaned at the warm sensation of the
other's body. His ass has only been fucked once, so it was
still tight. It was gripping my cock hard and I loved feeling
his insides move on my cock.

"Ah... it feels so good to have a warm cock in me." I couldn't
agree more. It's hard to decide which is more pleasurable,
fucking or being fucked. I love both. The best is to be able
to reciprocate, to do both, like Mike and I were doing. With
Ben, I knew he didn't want to be fucked, so that's out of the
question.

As I looked at his face, I could tell he was enjoying it. I
reached up and tweaked his nipples, causing him to moan
loudly. I squeezed his chest, stomach and leg muscles. I
caressed him all over. I lifted his heavy and muscular legs
onto my shoulders for better access. I felt the fine hairs on
his legs, admiring the muscles on him. He was indeed one beefy
stud.

As I slowly thrust in and out of Mike's hole, my hands felt
all over his chest and stomach. I wanted to take in
everything, to touch every part of him. I reached up and
caressed his thick neck, his strong arms. I even wanted to
touch his face, but I thought he might not like it. When I've
finished feeling all of his body, I focused on his cock. It
was not fully hard yet, resting on his stomach. I reached down
and played with his balls. I jiggled them in my hands one by
one. I loved feeling those huge balls. Everything about this
guy is huge; he's like a giant. I loved it. I moved up to his
cock and gave it a few tugs. Precum was leaking on top and I
used it to lube up his entire cock head. I paid special
attention to the underside; I knew it would drive him crazy.
Indeed, he started groaning and used his hand to cover his
eyes. His other hand was gripping the bed sheet tightly. What
a sexy sight.

I wanted this to last forever so I used a slow and steady
pace. I wanted to make love to this man, not just fuck him. I
made sure I hit his prostate when I thrust. He was grunting
and groaning so I knew I hit the right spot. He was loving
every second of it and so was I. This was a dream come true: a
straight guy who loved to be fucked. I kept on jerking him
while I fucked him. I used a circular motion on his cock head,
sometimes switching to stroking up and down the shaft. Then I
would play with his balls a bit and go back to his cock head.
He was rock hard and his cock was throbbing. I knew he was
close.

I gave him several long, hard strokes and he started clamping
down on my cock. I stroked him quickly and he shot a big load
on his stomach and chest. Watching him spray all over himself
was such a turn on. Some of it hit his face as well. I smeared
his cum all over his body, meshing up his hair. Then I took
some of his cum and tasted it, and I put some in his mouth as
well. I felt so nasty and dirty. I wanted him to lick his own
cum off my fingers. His whole chest and stomach were covered
in cum. When I smelled my hands, it was a mixture of cum and
his musk. I inhaled deeply and savored the smell. It was the
smell of masculinity.

Although he climaxed, I was far from done. I kept thrusting in
and out, varying between shallow and deep strokes. He was
breathless from his own orgasm, but I wasn't giving him rest.
I really wanted to fuck him good. If I get my way, he will at
least climax twice today. He started panting and groaning, as
if the stimulation was too intense. I reached forward and held
his chest for support as I kept pushing in and out. I wanted
to feel his heartbeat, to be connected to him.

I watched his cock shrink after the climax, but I wanted to
get it back up. I played with his balls a little bit,
stretching and pulling his sack. That really got to him as he
balls were very sensitive. I also massaged the area between
his hole and his balls, which was another sensitive spot. Then
I moved back up and played with his cock some more. I rubbed
all around his cock head, smearing the last drop of cum all
over it. He was moaning really loudly because his cock was
still sensitive after his climax, but he didn't stop me.

Then I remembered what he did to me before and I tried to do
the same. I tried to lift his ass up and fuck him from above,
but he was heavy so I couldn't lift him very high. I could
only position myself so I thrust diagonally downwards. I kept
rubbing his chest and stomach, giving his cock a little rest.
When I felt the time was right, I started going back to his
cock, stretching and pulling his shaft. Slowly, it began to
expand again, only this time it took longer. I kept jerking
him while I thrust deep and hard. I could feel my own climax
rising.

I wanted to time it so that we climax together. As I jerked
Mike, he kept groaning louder and louder. From his reaction, I
could tell he was close again. His breathing was labored and
his chest was heaving up and down. He was sweating all over
and he was really getting worked up. There was a pained
expression on his face. Pushing him to a second orgasm so soon
must be taxing to his body. However, I wanted to take it to
the max. I knew I may not get another chance to fuck him so I
wanted it to be great. I jerked and fucked him hard and fast,
reaching a frantic pace. I wanted us to have a spectacular
climax.

As I watched Mike reaching climax, I readied myself. His
reaction got me going. He was panting, grunting and moaning.
He was yelling and thrashing about. His hands were gripping
the bed sheet so hard it was all crumbled under him. It was
really intense for him. Finally, he yelled out, "Ahhhhh... I'm
cummingggggg!" and shot another load all over himself. He was
convulsing so hard his upper body bent up as though he was
doing sit-ups. With every shot his muscles contracted and he
bent upwards. When it was finally over, he collapsed from
total exhaustion. Meanwhile, I shot my own load in him, his
ass muscles milking my cock while he was in climax. I loved
cumming at the same time. It was such a rush; I felt so
connected. He almost passed out from the intense sex, cumming
twice. His chest was heaving and his body was covered in sweat
and cum. I pulled out of him and cum leaked from his hole onto
the bed sheet. I rubbed my cock against his, wanting to feel
his cock next to mine. I gave both a few strokes, just to
squeeze out the last drops of cum. We were both totally spent.

I wanted to feel close to him, so I lay on top of him. I
didn't think he would mind since he did that to me also. I
liked having our cum between our bodies, binding us together.
I loved feeling his chest moving up and down. I loved feeling
his breath next to mine. Most of all, I loved bringing so much
pleasure to this beautiful man. I wanted to lie there forever.
I was pleasantly surprised when he reached up and wrapped his
arms around me. We stayed like this for the entire afternoon.

When we both woke up from our nap hours later, I reluctantly
got up and went back to my bed. Mike was once again confused
as he thought about what we just did. "You really don't think
it was gay, what we just did?"

"The action itself was gay, but it doesn't make a person gay."
He looked even more confused.

"I mean straight people can try gay sex, and gay people can
try straight sex too."

"But if a straight guy keep having gay sex, is he still
straight?"

"If you decide you like gay sex more than straight sex, then
you are gay. If you like straight sex more, you are straight.
If you like both equally, you are bisexual."

"Ok, so I have to decide which one I like more."

"Yes, do you know the answer to that?"

"I think I still like straight sex more."

"See, I told you. You are straight."

"Thanks for clearing that up."

"You are welcome."

"So this means I should stop the gay sex, since I'm straight."

"If that's what you want."

He looked straight at me, no longer confused. "That's what I
want." So, he was sending me a clear message. I was not going
to fuck him again. I was ok with that. I already expected it.

"So Mike, why don't you call Daisy and hook up with her? Watch
a movie or something."

"Yeah, that's a good idea." He picked up his phone and called.
While calling, he was humping his bed and his ass was
wriggling, which I found pretty cute. I enjoyed watching this
sexy beefcake, but I also knew our fun times would soon be
over.