Date: Tue, 11 Jun 2013 01:28:07 -0700 (PDT) From: Matthew Lide <muthighuhsun@yahoo.com> Subject: Romance & Renaissance - A Story of Jacob and Logan - Chapter 1 If you are underage (according to your state laws as a minor), if this literature is offensive to you, or if it is illegal for you to view such content at your location, don't read this story. Additionally, this story cannot be distributed in any way, shape, or form without my expressed consent. This is my first story, and it is created from my experiences, imagination, and different interests in regard to literature, television, and movies. Finally, I certify that I am over 18 years of age at the time of writing this story. Written by Mecks. Chapter 1 It is a deeply romantic notion to believe you and your beloved were brought together by a divine plan, that destiny has deemed you to become one once again. Destiny. Such a fucked up concept. The idea that the universe cares even an inconsequential amount about the happenings of mere organisms of but one in over 30 million species. Bullshit. ____ How severely, strikingly wrong I was. Looking back, I always knew. From the moment I saw him. _______ I woke up that morning, September 16th, as pissed as ever. I'd like to say I wasn't in a constant state of annoyance but, before I met him, I was. Chewing on my strangely crunchy eggs while observing my 7-year-old brother at the dining table, I knew the day would be just like any other: uneventful. Boy, was I wrong. I'm a junior in high school. Well, not just any high school. Theodore Gray High School is one of the most prestigious high schools in the states. My mom, understandably, has (well?, had) high hopes for me, so she decided to enroll me with other high-achieving students, saying "Jacob, you'll make higher grades if you're surrounded by better students. And you know higher grades means a better college; we've got to stick to the plan." The plan. An 8-year set of goals she's decided would earn the most money for me, culminating in a graduation from Princeton University. Mom kick-started this extravagant scheme when she placed me in TGHS, following her divorce three years ago. Then, I suppose, since I was the only remaining fruit of a 40-year-long set of labors, I became her star. I guess when your whole life is one person, as hers was me, you'll do everything in your power to create what you perceive to be the best life for that person. However, ever since Jeremy was born, a surprise brought about by another failed relationship, things have changed. Watching a single mother provide for 2 kids, I can understand the difficulties and, being 17 years old, I can see why she needs to put her attention toward the younger of the two Brown children. But, though I regret saying it, I'm happy she's stopped questioning me about my social life. Well, to be completely honest, 'social' life is a stretch for me. It's safe to say I don't fit in here; not that I'm stupid, just that, unlike the other students, I'm almost positive I won't be the next Mozart or Einstein. For that reason, I haven't really connected with many people since changing schools. I had friends in middle school; a lot, actually. But, not anymore. _____________________________________________________________________________ I walked into school that day contemplating suicide and wine, a quite fascinating combination if I say so myself. Why wine? Well, considering the lax parenting, teenage angst, and dreams of sophistication, wine has become my drink of choice. Mom doesn't exactly know I steal from her stash, though. She's too caught up in Jeremy and her own bouts with depression to realize how many glasses she drinks a night, so taking one or two glasses at a time isn't noticeable. "Jacob!!" "Oh, Kasey? hi! I haven't seen you since?.yesterday." "Shut up, have you seen him yet??" "Who??" "He's new, come on," Kasey said as she dragged me into the school lobby. "Over there!" Sometimes Kasey was annoying but, being the only true friend I had at TGHS, I didn't complain. "Kasey, you do realize it's too early for?.." Our eyes met, driven by an unspeakable need for the other. The green I saw was unrivaled by neither the brightest emerald nor the most dense forest. I felt crippled. But crippled, even with the severe connotations, seems so utterly powerless in describing the feeling which rushed through me. It felt like, in some deep, twisted, way, I've seen him before. That this encounter was just a reunion. A long, long overdue reunion. That sometime in the past he was taken -no, ripped- from me, and only now has the universe shown me mercy and given him back. "JACOB! COME ON! WE'RE GONNA BE LATE!!" "?.what?" "Did you not hear the bell?? Come on!" As Kasey pulled me in the school, I got one last look. Logan's face was contorted in a strange, yet compelling, mix of intrigue and confusion. Shit?.Logan thinks I'm creepy. How did I already mess this up? Wait? Logan? His name? How do I know his name? I must've made the name up?I've never seen this boy before; I haven't. What I'm feeling? it's?it's... ______________________________________________________________________________ I saw him once that day; well, if you don't count the amount of times I thought of him. Luckily, Kasey stopped my obsessive thoughts by suggested we stop by the carnival that night. One of the perks of living in Albuquerque is all the carnivals, circuses, and attractions seem to stop by on their journey either to or from California. It's a great city, at least to me. A lot of my friends hate it, holding on to dreams of 'escaping' to New York, or L.A., or just somewhere that's? different. For me, not feeling close to many people in the city or my family, Albuquerque isn't really home. Though I've lived here all my life, there's nothing really to get away from; since I don't have anything, there's no home from which to escape. As we walked to the previously empty field housing the carnival, Kasey interrupted the silence, saying "So? I saw your mother yesterday." My mom? "Where?" "I saw her at L'?toile; she had a guy on her arm." "I guess she's dating again..." "Shouldn't you know?" "Kasey, you know we don't talk?" ? ? Breaking the silence, she muttered "he looked nice. Tall, dark hair." "Just like every other one." ? "I don't know why you're so against her having fun. She's trying to be happy; let her!" "I'm not stopping her; she can do whatever she pleases. I'm just saying?.when I was Jere's age, she didn't drink; she didn't go out; she didn't leave me with whatever babysitter is available. The newest one almost killed Jeremy!!!" "I think you're overreacting." "Yeah, well? let's just buy the tickets," I said, motioning to the booth as we walked into the carnival. We were sitting atop the ferris wheel, seemingly looking over all of Albuquerque. The wind blew softly, ruffling my hair and providing a certain comfort. It felt right, like I was distanced, but not rejected, from the world below me. Looking absent-mindedly to the gondola below ours, I was startled. It was him. It was only the back of his head, but I knew. "Can we get off here now?! I told you I hated heights!," Kasey complained, alerting me to her presence. "Shhhhh, come here! Look," I whispered while motioning her to my side. "What?," Kasey murmured as she delicately looked over the edge. "Oh, him. Wait?who's he with? Is that?.Rebecca James?" "Yeah, let's follow them," I said as I stepped off the ride and began jogging after the peculiar pair. "I still don't understand your obsession with him. He's not even gay; he's with HER for goodness sake, you know how far she goes on the first date?" "They're not together; he's gay." "Jacob?," she sounded exasperated. "There!," I shouted while running for the bumper cars. They were already in line, so Kasey and I slipped in a few groups behind. "Wait - hide me!," I exclaimed, realizing the consequences of being caught. "Stand in front of me; hurry! He can't know I'm following him." "Um? Jacob, I hate to disappoint you, but I don't think he cares...," she pointed reluctantly at the two. "What??" I turned to him, but all I saw was the back of her head, reaching up for a passionate kiss with Logan. They seemed happy, ignorant of the world around them. It was the type of kiss shared by a long-separated couple. What I thought we were. What they must be. I walked away from the ride, away from Logan, away from Kasey, away from everything. _______________________________________________________________________________ I'm not sure when I stopped walking. I must've went far because the view around me was truly unfamiliar. Surrounded by trees, standing on a dirt road which held no tracks but my own, I wondered how far away I was from the city. Judging by the ache in my calves and the light breaking through the canopy of the trees, it's easily after 7am. I missed school. Looking at my phone, I saw 15 missed calls. All from Kasey. I called my mom, doubting she'd answer. "Jacob I don't know where you are, but I've never seen a kid more irresponsible in my life. You ran off last night; do you realize how that affected me? Do you realize I wasted 3 hours last night looking for you? I could have finished two more cases during that time..." "Mom, just come get me," I said, interrupting her. "Where are you?," she grunted. "I'm not sure?.somewhere west of the city." "Alright, I'll find you." Hanging up, I knew how wrong my earlier statement was; today was very eventful. I've become obsessed with a boy I've never spoken to in my life. A boy who, for a day, I convinced myself was, and has always been, irrevocably in love with me. I've walked for hours and am now lost in who knows where, waiting for my selfish mother to take me to a school I hate. I'm going crazy. About an hour after the call, my mom arrived, motioning for me to get in the car. I stepped in, adverting her judgmental glare. She began driving and, for 15 minutes, said nothing. Eventually, she repeated her speech given in the call. Initially planning on ignoring the complaints like I always have, I instinctively jerked at her mention of 'irresponsible.' Somehow, with everything that's happened in the past 24 hours, I couldn't sit and listen to her bullshit. I erupted, exclaiming "Mom, you've become one of the most irresponsible parents. The only things you care about now are your dates and your career. How many hours a day do you spend with Jeremy? How many?! He's 7 years old! And when you are home, you're fucking drunk." I waited a couple minutes, fearing the worst in her inevitable reaction. After an unbearable silence, I looked over. She was crying. I've never seen her cry before. Before I could say something, we pulled up to the school and, knowing how late I already was, I decided to leave the conversation for a better time. I entered the school hoping I hadn't went too far. _____________________________________________________________________________ Logan stared at me, full of desperate lust. He winked, then pulled my face to his. Our lips met, bringing about a soft moan in Logan. Then his urgency strengthened, pushing me onto the grass below us. He quickly unbuttoned my doublet, a testament to the amount of practice he's had with my clothing. Moving quickly to my breeches, I lifted up on my elbows to continue our kiss. To my dismay, he broke the kiss, but quickly remedied my spirit by lowering his mouth to my underwear. Holding my breath, I waited for the forthcoming pleasure. "Jacob!" I jerked awake. "Huh" "You come in late, and now you fall asleep. Get yourself together, Jacob," said Mr. Thomas. "Sorry, sir," I murmured. Fortunately, the bell rang, saving me from the confrontation. I rushed out into the hallway, and instantly saw Kasey. She raced toward me, an obvious concern on her face. "I called you 15 times! What happened?! Where did you go?! I was worried?,"she said, obviously distressed. "Sorry, Kasey. Everything's okay. I'll explain later," I replied, hoping to ease her anxiety. "Lunch?right?" "Yeah, I'll be there-the usual table." "You know, I get it - you think the guy's cute - but that doesn't justify running off like that. I'm your best friend; you can't just leave me." "Look, I?I'm sorry Kasey. The last couple of weeks have been hard for me; I've had a lot on my mind." "I know babe? We'll talk later," Kasey replied as we split off to our respective classes. _____________________________________________________________________________ It's frightening how you can feel so lonely surrounded by the laughter of other people. At least when sitting at 3am alone in your room, you can envision others doing the same. It's conceivable that there are people that feel similar, people with the same problems as you. But in the afternoon, sitting with apparently happen people, you're fully, utterly, alone. "Jacob, it's him," Kasey said, interrupting my thoughts. "Don't run off again." I followed her finger to a spot across the cafeteria. He was staring back at me. "Sorry," I said, rising and dismissing Kasey's frantic motions to sit back down. Practically jogging across the room, I wasn't in control of my body. I should be sitting in my chair, but I was sprinting to a straight guy I haven't met before. But it felt right. It felt like? with all the other shit going on around me, this was the only thing I've done where I was fully, and happily, in control. The only thing where I had no doubts, no hesitation, no reluctance. As I took my fitting seat beside him, his head reached up to mine, revealing a smile that seemed oh so familiar. "Hey Jacob" _____________________________________________________________________________ "Logan." He radiated. I couldn't help but blush. He caressed my cheek, saying "Jacob, let's get out of here. Skip school for a day, please... Since I saw you yesterday, I?I needed to talk to you. WE need to talk." His lips, pursed and, yet, unable to contain his budding smile. I vividly remembered them; their feel, their taste. I needed them; my decision was made. "Hold on; I need my stuff," I said while hurriedly jogging over to my table. Kasey looked at me incredulously, "Where are you going?! You can't miss class again! What would your mother think??" "I have to!," I shouted back and ran to the door. I reached the door, propelled by an overwhelming need to be with the person holding it open for me. Running into the blinding sun was one of the greatest feelings of my 17-year-old life. The sun, bright seemingly to represent my mood, reflected off Logan's green eyes, putting their brightness in direct contrast with his dark, almost charcoal hair. His voice interrupted my musings, affecting me with its charm. With every word he spoke, coupled with his magnetic smile, I was overcome. I couldn't help but smile; infectious, I suppose, is the word most accurately describing his allure. But even 'infectious' seems to downplay the feeling. It's not an 'infection,' as the word would suggest. His effect is not fleeting; he has the capability to make you a lastingly better, happier, more complete person by just being with you. I suppose I looked strange, staring at this boy with wonder and a wide open, grinning mouth. But, I guess when you care more about the person you're looking at than anyone who could be watching, it doesn't faze you. Shaking myself of his allure, I knew I had to confront him. "So?Rebecca James?" "Let me explain." I looked into his eyes, instantly seeing immense regret. "Kasey can't know about us. I saw you guys following us at the carnival last night, so I had to kiss Rebecca; Kasey has to think I'm straight, or at least we're never going to be together." "What??" "I know you're friends with her, but make her forget about me. Make her forget about us." "Wait, why??" "Just?trust me," he said while pulling me into an embrace. His scent. It's such a clich? to have attraction to the way someone smells, but that feeling's usually accompanied by a deodorant or cologne. With Logan, the scent was wholly, completely, him. And it was intoxicating. He gently pushed me back, only for long enough to look into my eyes, completely erasing my doubt. Smiling briefly, he leaned in and matched my lips with his, finally satisfying my aching hunger. I couldn't control myself; I pushed Logan against the brick wall, arousing a soft cry from deep within his throat. My passion rose, along with my hunger for him. I've never felt so hungry in my life; starved, even. Like there was an insatiable hole in my stomach, which grew exponentially with every taste of him. I needed him, all of him. "RIIIINNGGGG." My ears rang at the sound of the bell, disrupted the intimacy of our interaction. "Shit," Logan murmured as he broke our contact. "Wait," I complained, pulling him back to me. "We can go somewhere else." "No, Jacob. Kasey's going to look for you. She can't know we've kissed; you running out with me was already too dangerous." "Oh..Okay," I stuttered as Logan began to walk away, slowly dropping his hand from my cheek. "Jacob, there you are!," I heard Kasey exclaim behind me. I said nothing, nor did I turn around. My only concern lay in the gleam of Logan's skin as it soaked in the sun's rays. ____________________________________________________________________________ If you liked this story, or find it interesting and want to see further plot development, please e-mail me at Muthighuhsun@yahoo.com. I would love knowing how the readers perceive this story, including any criticisms, and would use such feedback to determine if I should continue the story. Thanks for reading!