Date: Sat, 30 Apr 2005 07:58:41 -0700 (PDT)
From: Ray <yaalc@yahoo.com>
Subject: sebastian chapter 3

     By the time we'd gone through all the formalities
and got me situated it was almost 10 am. Because they
only have the one public school for the whole city,
they ran classes in two shifts. One in the morning,
and one in the afternoon. I would only have to endure
2 more hours. There was only one English teacher, Mrs.
Huber, she taught grades 6 through 12. So every class
was a different age and ability. Each class lasted 50
minutes. I felt like I could make it through ok.

     The bell ending that class rang. As everyone
dashed out of the classroom, Mrs. Huber stopped me and
asked me to stay behind for a minute. She asked me a
bit about myself, what dad and I were doing here just
the basics. It was nice, she actually spoke English
fairly well, nothing like my Spanish teacher back
home. I think she'd gone to Mexico once and that was
her qualification.

     "In between classes there's a 10 minute break,
your welcome to sit here and talk to me or you can go
out to the courtyard. Just try to be back on time. I'm
cutting you some slack today but starting tomorrow I
would like to start using you to help my students.
You're being here is a unique opportunity for them to
learn from someone that has spoken English since
birth. Is that going to be okay with you?"

     I shrugged "why not" but I didn't feel like it
was okay. I felt like I was going to be on display
like an animal in the zoo. I started feeling a little
claustrophobic. I asked to be excused and went out to
the courtyard to catch some fresh air.

     I sat down on the bench, took a few deep breaths
to calm down a bit, and started looking around. The
courtyard was full of kids standing in groups, or
walking from one class to another. Everyone I looked
at seemed to be glancing or pointing in my direction,
and I noticed a lot of the girls giggling. It was
probably just my imagination, but that didn't help me
feel any less insecure, it just what a guy with a
complex needed.

     I got up and ducked back into the classroom just
as quickly as I'd left it. I grabbed a seat in the
very back and sat there as quietly as I could, hoping
I wouldn't be noticed. Of course the teacher had to
introduce me at the beginning of the last 2 classes. I
didn't understand a word of what she said, but I knew
she was talking about me being there as an opportunity
for them. Each time she called me up I could feel the
heat rising up the back of my neck, there was more
giggling from the girls, and it was all I could do to
make it back to my seat.

     This wasn't what I'd hoped for when they told me
I would just be in English class. I'd really hoped I
could just sit in the back and concentrate on trying
to learn Spanish from them. I had no clue how I was
going to help anyone. I've never taught anything and
the thought of being put into that sort of interaction
scared the shit out of me.

     The last class of the day was full of kids my
age, and for some reason that seemed to embarrass me
even more than the earlier ones. I realized that
sooner or later, these would be my peers in other
classes. I felt so alone and helpless at that moment.
I couldn't figure out a way to communicate with any of
them and I figured by the time I could that it would
be too late. Their first impressions of me would be
made, and I'd be a loner once again. It was a shock to
admit to myself that I really had been lonely back
home, and that I'd held out some hope that I could
almost start over and be normal here. After all nobody
knew anything about me, and there was no way in hell
they could know my secret right? So all I had to do
was keep that part of me hidden, and I could be
normal. Hell I could even find a girl to date and
nobody would even think "that" of me.

     When the class ended I waited until everyone else
was gone, then trudged my way out to the courtyard
again. It was still cold so I put my coat back on and
dug into my backpack for the lunch I'd brought with
me.  I was eating my sandwich when I realized that a
lot of people were not just glancing at me but
downright staring at me. Looking around I tried to
figure out what I'd done to warrant such attention. It
slowly dawned on me that no one else was eating. I
thought back on the day and realized there wasn't even
a cafeteria here. I thought I'd been smart to bring my
lunch so I wouldn't have to try to ask for something,
continuing the thought process brought me to the other
reason school let out at noon. Everyone from the
morning must go home to eat and the others ate before
coming to school.

     My throat dried so fast I almost chocked on the
bite of sandwich that I'd just finished swallowing. I
forced it down, threw my lunch back in my backpack and
got up to leave as quickly as I could. I made it to
the exit, when a kid my age stepped in front of me. I
recognized him from my last English class. He towered
over me, at least six inches taller than my 5'5". He
was athletically built, like someone who was active
but not someone who lifted weights all the time. And
he was very cute. He had the dark hair, eyes and olive
complexion I'd expected everyone here to have. His
face was clear of blemishes.

     I looked up at him then quickly looked back down
and tried to sidestep him to leave. Shit its starting
here now, I was used to being a target, but I'd sure
hoped it would be different here. He stepped to block
my path and all I could do was breath out a resigned
sigh. I hung my head and waited for the inevitable.

     He said something to which I responded with my
three favorite words, "no hablo espanol"

     "I said hi, not hola"

     It took a second for what he'd said to enter my
brain and another second for me to process it. I
raised my head to find him smiling at me, definite
amusement written all over his face.

     "Oh, sorry I didn't hear you, hi yourself"

     "It ok you probably no think it" his English
wasn't perfect then, but he was talking to me and I
understood him, and even better he wasn't going to use
me to elevate his standing as class bully.

     "My name Enrique, people say me Ricky" he held
his hand out to me.

     "My name is Sean, nice to meet you"

     He looked at me with his brow furrowed. I'd later
come to recognize that as what he did when he was
concentrating intently on something. His brow smoothed
out and the smile returned.

     "Ah, it nice to meet you, same"

     Okay so his English wasn't all that good at all,
but it was the most I'd conversed with someone besides
my dad and Senora Huber since I'd arrived. On second
thought it was almost the most I'd conversed with
someone since we'd moved 6 years earlier.

     "You go your house?"

     "Yes, my house is that way" I pointed up the
street.

     "Oh? Me same, I walk with?"

     "Sure"

      The relief finally overwhelmed me and I started
giggling.

     He looked at me funny again. I bit my tongue to
stop giggling, shrugged and we left the school. Turns
out he lives around the corner from me. We fell into
an easy friendship, and all that winter we spent as
much time together as possible. We had a tacit
agreement, whenever we weren't in public or with
someone else I spoke as much Spanish as possible as I
learned it, with him correcting every error I made,
and in return he spoke all English, with me correcting
his errors. I never felt bad or discouraged when he
corrected me and I know he felt the same.

     When I got home that night, dad had left me a
note, saying he was going to dinner with some clients
and that I was on my own. With the note was a 5 peso
bill. I didn't have a clue as to what to do about
dinner. I was tossing ideas around when I heard his
voice again. This time yelling what sounded like:

     "Empanadas! Churros!"

     I had no idea what he was saying. But I hurried
outside hoping for just a glimpse of him. He was next
door, with a large basket hanging on his arm. He
looked exactly like he had that morning, maybe more
tired but he still took my breath away. He was putting
something on a plate the lady next door had with her.
She slipped him some money and he turned to walk
towards my house. I ran inside to grab a plate and
hurried down to the sidewalk to wait for him.

     When he saw me he got an impish grin on his face
and said:

     "¿Queres empanadas?"

     "No hablo espanol."

     His grin morphed into a huge smile as he said
something else. It sounded like what he had said that
morning but I still had no idea what it was.

     "No hablo espanol" I repeated and held my plate
out.

     He could barely contain his laughter as he was
putting empanadas on the plate. When there were 6
there I stopped him and gave him the 5 pesos. Once
again he tried to give me some change but I waved him
off. If his smile could have gotten any bigger it
would have split his face in half.

     "Gracias"

     "De nada," hey I'd learned 2 more words that day.

     He looked at me for a bit and I wasn't about to
turn away from him. Then once again I saw that
transformation from a smiling happy kid, to the
dejected wretch. And once again I felt like my heart
was being ripped out. He shuffled off. I went in to
eat whatever it was he'd sold me, and hey they turned
out to be excellent. I thought if he sells these every
day, Ill be a regular. The day's events had worn me
out so I called it an early night and crawled into
bed. After all I had to be up at 530 to get the paper.
I smiled to myself as I fell asleep.


        Constructive criticism and comments gladly accepted. 
Please email me at yaalc@yahoo.com. 
 
Copyright Notice - Copyright 2005 by yaalc. 
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