Date: Wed, 15 Sep 2010 11:34:13 -0700 (PDT)
From: K Davids <k.davids@ymail.com>
Subject: Some Sense Of Security/Some Sense Of Security Ch4
This story is fiction and is not intended to imply anything about the
true sexuality of the This story contains sexual contact between to
underage males if this is illegal to read where you live then please
hit the back button now and do not read on! Everything in this story is
PURE FICTION made up by me all the characters, and where it takes place
is all fiction even the names please do not copy it and post it
anywhere else Feel free to email me
k.davids@ymail.com
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Well this is chapter 4 and this chapter will be intense, it will break
all silences, feelings will be heard, and things will heat up......
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I'm looking for some stable ground Some kinda place to lay it down
And settle for a while I'm sick of looking for a star
I won't show anyone my scars Can you help me out?
I wanna see a change in me
When it's time for another round I get in then I bow out
I'm kinda freaky that way I used to stand as tall as I could
I used to be better than good I guess I've made my bed
I wanna see a change in me
"No I Don't" -The Almost
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-Tanners POV-
I slowly trace the bruises on Chasen's abdomen and chest lightly.
He is sound asleep after an hour of crying so hard and
hyperventilating. I don't think he has let out this much emotion in so
long that he probably forgot how too.
I slowly trace them again there so huge and the discoloration of
the skin from the dark purple to blue, to the ugly yellowish gives me
chills. I don't know who could do this to a person and feel ok about
it. He still hasn't told me who it is. His skin is so silky soft.
I lay beside him his breathing is even now, he looks so peaceful
not all the worry on him when he sleeps he looks so young defiantly
beautiful though his light blond hair falling into his eyes down to his
big lips, they look so soft I want to lean in and kiss them. His bare
chest down to his four pack which I find so sexy even with the bruises
on his I want to just hold him but I don't want to scare him when he
wakes.
I lay there, trying to decide what to do. Do I tell my mom and
dad? Do I betray him and tell them? Or do I just sit and talk to him
and ask him what's going on who is doing this to him, and why.
I lay with him for about 20 more minutes and I get up and go to
the bathroom and get him a glass of water for when he wakes. As I walk
back into the room I notice he is awake looking at me.
"Hey buddy, how are you feeling?"
"Not very great my head is pounding." He says and looks dejected.
"Well I would say so with all the emotions you let out, good
thing I prepare ahead of time. Here take these it will knock your
headache out." I hand him aspirin and the water.
"Thanks." He says and takes them and drinks the water and downs
the medicine. He looks at me and frowns, "guess you want and
explanation huh?"
I sit next to him and give him a sympathetic look, "yeah I would
like one, I mean it's not everyday I have a cu...good friend let out that
much emotion over nothing." I look away because I nearly slipped in
front of him.
He looks at me, "yeah, guess your right. So not a chance on
letting me off the hook with the explanation?"
"No not a chance this time." I tell him shaking my head.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
-Chasen's POV-
I look at him trying to find enough courage to gather what I'm
going to tell him... I'm fixing to out myself to the kindest person in my
life and I want to puke right now. My stomach is doing flips I feel
like I'm burning up.
"I will tell you Tanner; just it cannot leave this room at all."
"Ok, just let me in please." He tells me.
"Tanner promise me it won't leave us please, I'm begging you?"
"Yes I promise. Just who did this to you?" He asks scooting
closer to me.
"It started after my Dad left in 8th grade my mom started to drink
and well, she found some things out and she started to hit me." I tell
him.
"Oh, Chasen I'm so, so sorry. She can't do this to you we half to
tell the cops someone, why does she do this to you? What could make a
mother do this to her own son?" He asks getting worked up.
"It's because I'm different ok." I say getting off the bed.
"Chasen everyone's different it gives her no right to beat you
like that!" he tell me following me.
"NO! You don't get it Tanner; I'm different, really different ok.
I'm GAY! Ok I like boys!" I shout at him, "I should go now ok? I just
need to get away from you I don't want you to hate me either, thanks
for everything." I tell him and turn my back on him and walk towards
the door.
I feel his hand grab my arm and he swings me around and I panic I
drop to my knees and flinch, and close my eyes waiting for the blow to
hit me. Instead I feel him drop next to me and hug me...
"I don't hate you Chase; I could never hate you, because I'm gay
as well! Well I think I am all I know is I like you, and I have never
felt like this about anyone." He whispers to me in my ear.
I just let him hug me and I start to cry again, and I can't stop I
hate it but I feel so safe with his arms around me, and he takes my
face and wipes my tears away and tell me its ok.
I look at him in the eyes those green eyes they show so much
compassion and he takes my face and he leans in and he kisses me, its
slow, soft, tender unlike anything I have ever experienced and he pulls
away and smiles at me and I fall into him crying more.
I don't remember much, but I guess I passed out. I woke up in Tanners bed
with my head on his chest...I don't know what happened I don't know if this is a
dream or what because I'm laying my head on the hottest kid in my school and my
head is on his chest and close to his six pack that is so hott.
Then it comes flooding back like a water damn released. Tanner tickling
me, him finding the bruises, me telling him my mom was responsible, them me
outing my self to him, and then he kissed me. My god it wasn't a dream he
actually did kiss me!
I look at him asleep with a smile on his face. I wonder what his last
thought was. Was it about me? Will it all be the same in the morning? Or will
he realize what I am and beat me as well, no wait he wouldn't! He kissed me I
didn't kiss him he kissed me, and it was perfect, his soft lips on mine they
where gentle but firm. I lay my head back on his chest, as I watch his abdomen
rise and fall to the rhythm of his breathing I start to lose myself to sleep.
I wake up to the feel of someone brushing their hand through my hair. I
look up and I see Tanner smiling at me I blush.
"Morning cutie." He says to me
"Hi...umm, sorry for falling asleep on you. How did I get into your bed?"
I
ask stretching and turning towards him.
He smiles and lets out a little laugh, "You kind of fell asleep on me when
we were on the floor. So I carried you to bed with me, and its ok I liked that
you put your head on my chest it was cute."
"So you're ok that I'm Gay?" I ask hesitantly.
He leans down and kisses me again this time it was quick peck, "Yes, I
told you I'm fine with the fact you are gay. Well because I like you Chasen."
My mind whirls as it actually sinks in that he likes me, Tanner Garret
like me? "You like me? As in like, like?"
"Yes you dork I like, like you." He says and leans back and looks at me
with that grin, "In-fact Chase I want you to be my boyfriend!"
I look at him in shock did he just really say that? This boy must be
crazy! "Wait you want me to be your...your boyfriend?"
"Yes! You don't understand I have liked you for the last month even
before we talked I knew who you were. I like you and I want you to be my
boyfriend that way I know you are safe and I can hold you when you feel hurt or
scared." He tells me and takes my hand looking in my eyes.
"I...I have li...liked you for so long as well." I splutter out, "Tanner I
want to be your boyfriend, but I don't want to bring you down with me. I am not
exactly liked at school." I tell him looking down.
He lifts my chin and makes me look into his eyes, "If you don't want to
deal with it at school I can deal with that I just want you!"
He then leans in and kisses me and it's not like the first or second its
much slower, softer and he slowly opens his mouth, and slips his tongue into my
mouth. I massage his with mine and I roll on top of him still kissing
passionately, as he runs his hands threw my hair.
I come up for air and smile at him and scoot off him and just smile at
him, he smiles back at me.
"So does that mean yes?" he asks.
"Duh!" I say and kiss him again.
We just sit back in his bed and talk for awhile nothing great at all, just
what classes we hate and teachers we like. He told me about Mr. Davis. Who has
tried to talk to me on more than one occasion but you know me I'm really to hard
headed to talk to any one about my life much less a teacher...no matter how cool
Tanner says he is.
My face hurts from smiling so much its been so long since I smiled and
laughed so hard I start to get a stomach ache.
--------------------------------Tanner POV-------------------------------------
We talked for a few hours before I heard a knock on my door.
"Tanner honey, come here we have to talk ok!" my mom said through the
door.
I instantly felt Chasen's mood change and I looked at him and the smile
was gone, "Babe its ok! She just doesn't want to be rude and barge in on us
there is nothing to be scared about." I tell him and he offers a weak smile.
I get up and reach for a shirt to throw on, and walk out of my room to the
office where my mom is laying on her "therapy couch" as we all call it because
it looks just like one.
"Hey Mom!"
She eyes me and I look back and ask what is it, she laughs and ask if I
stole Chasen's shirt...I look down and I now notice I grabbed the wrong shirt,
it
wasn't mine at all it was Chasen's
"Uh, yeah I liked it so much thought I would wear it." I tell her grinning
sitting on the couch with her
"Well don't stretch it out honey, your bigger compared to him he's a
stick, does he get enough food at home?" She asks
"Yeah mom he isn't a big eater. Your right I might stretch it out that
wouldn't be good. So what did you want to talk about?"
"I know you have company over, but do you think you and Chasen can take
Troy and his friend to the mall for me please?" She pleads with me.
I groan and look at her with "you are you joking look".
"Please Tann, I will even give you my credit card for you and Chasen even
take my car! I would but I just have one of those migraines." She looks at me
intensely.
"Yes mom I will now pass that nice card over!" I smile and laugh as she
hands me the card and her keys.
Well as you can probably guess my family is well off. My mom is a bank
manager and is pretty high in the branch, and my Dad is a biochemist, I don't
really know what that is. That and my dad's parents died a while back and left a
good well huge chunk of money for us. Considering my father was their only
child.
I walk back to the bedroom and I see Chasen, looking at pictures on my
entertainment center of me and my brother I walk up silently and wrap my arms
around him and kiss his neck and he jumps!
"FUCK! Tanner, you scared me!" he shouts
I laugh and say sorry; I explain to him what's going on. He looks and
smiles and kisses me...WOW he actually kisses me not me making the move.
"What was that about?" I ask with a smile.
"Felt like it, now what am I going to wear since you stretched my shirt
out!" he asks.
"Well I like you shirtless but maybe I have something for you in my closet
might be big on you though." I tell him as I walk over to my closet and look
through my shirt.
I find one a grin back at him and throw a shirt at him.
"No way are you joking?" He asks looking at the shirt; it's an aqua color
v-neck shirt.
"Yeah I think it would totally look sexy on you and it would bring out
your hair and eyes babe." I say with a smile.
"You are so gay Tanner." He says and puts the shirt on and it looks
perfect.
"I'm only gay for you babe." I tease him and kiss his cheek, "come on babe
get ready you look good in your skinny jeans and aqua shirt!"
"ugh but I look horrible!" he moans.
I walk over to him and grab his hand and make him look me in the eye,
"you're not horrible you are so cute it should be a crime the way you make me
feel! Understand I like you for you and no other reason."
Before he had a chance to say anything there was a knock at my door and
Troy poked his head in, and told us to hurry! That Aaron was waiting for us to
get to his house.
We tell him we are almost ready, we just had to get our shoes on to go get
the car started. I laughed when he ran out to do what I said and just looked at
Chasen as he smiled. We got our shoes on and headed out the door.
As we got into my moms Black escalade, Troy piped up, "Jeez! Ya'll took so
long, if I didn't know any better I would say you both were makin out with each
other!"
I laugh and tell him to shut up before I change my mind and look over at
Chasen who is red in the face looking down, we both laugh and I start off to go
pick up Aaron.
We laugh and joke the whole ride over to Aarons and we finally arrive and
I tell troy to go get Aaron I don't want to wait all day.
"Do you think he knows?" Chasen asks as soon as Troy closes the door.
I laugh and shake my head, "Dude, he is so clueless he would never know."
He smiles and we hear the car door open and to rowdy teens get in. I tell
Aaron hello, and introduce him to Chasen and we start off towards the mall.
Aaron is your typical skater teenager with the shaggy hair that is dark
brown that just flows all together that makes you jealous, and honey brown eyes
with full pink lips and skinny as a rail and the skinny jeans that hang on his
ass, and the skater shoes and the random shirt on.
Chasen stays pretty quiet on the way to the mall, but its not a bad one
it's the just relaxed quiet and I ask him what he wants to look at in the mall.
"I don't have any money so it's whatever I will just chill, and follow
wherever you go." He tells me.
"Dude its cool mom gave me the card she said to get us something." I tell
him.
"MOM gave you the card!" Troy asks.
"She gave me the card haha your not going to max it out on dumb stuff
buddy." I tell him
"No I couldn't get anything with your mom's money" Chasen mumbles.
"No Chase mom wants me to get you a new shirt since I stretched it out she
is totally fine with it, that's her way of saying sorry for volunteering you too
take the two rowdy kids in the back to the mall." I explain as I get to heys
from the back seat and I tell them to hush it.
--------------------------Chasen's POV------------------------------------------
I love being around Tanners family and his little brothers friend who is t
to bad on the eyes, but my eyes are on the drive Tanner. I still can't get over
my luck I mean I get to be with this boy!
We arrive at the mall and as soon as we park Troy jets off and shouts
to call him later, we both look at each other and smile, Tanner leans in and
kisses me and then we get out of the SUV and head in to the mall.
"Hey Chase, go find you a new shirt at forever 21, or hot topic, or
whatever store you want I have to go pick up something my mom told me to."
Tanner says bounding off leaving me to go to a store on my own.
I choose Hot topic thinking maybe they will have a shirt that I will like.
I look through the shirts and I find one that white and it has random shapes it
bright colors on it, and I really, really like it so I decide it's the one I
want.
Next this I feel something being hooked onto my wrist I look back its
Tanner, he smiles and I look at my wrist.
On my wrist is a bracelet in rainbow colors, I smile and he shows me his
ankle and there is one and he takes the shirt from my hand and smiles and takes
it to the counter.
I can't keep from smiling as we walk out of the store I look at him, "So
that's what your mom had you pick up huh?"
"Well what can I say I like you! I wanted to show I'm yours and your
mine." He says while blushing.
"Ok babe I say, so where to now?" I ask.
"How about we go stop at the food court I'm a little hungry." He says
pulling me with him.
We walk to the food court and I get a drink while he gets us both a huge
pretzel, and we walk to a table, "So I'm glad we came to the mall today." He
says.
"I am too, and I feel sexy wearing your shirt." I say winking at him
causing him to blush.
"TANNER! Is that you over there?" We both look to the way of the voice calling
his name and there is Kristy walking towards us.
"FUCK!" I sigh, and wait for her to approach.
"Hi! Tan baby how are you I missed you at the game last night." She says
and pulls a chair up close to him and Tanner just sighs.
"I'm fine Kristy I'm kind of busy, talking with Chasen." He says
"I'm sure he doesn't mind, do you? No didn't think so, oh cute bracelet
by the way. Guess the rumor is true you are gay." She says and looks away as if
I'm trash and I feel that low.
"KRISTY! What the fuck is your deal with him, Chasen is a cool person,
leave him alone and stop being such a bitch all the time maybe more people will
like you." Tanner stands up furious and looks at me and tell me lets go.
We walk and leave her alone in shock. I still can't believe I'm just a
"cool person" when I'm actually his boyfriend and I mention it, "so I'm just a
cool person and not your boyfriend now?"
"Babe please don't start that, look I can't come out right now, I want to
tell my parents first." He says getting frustrated.
"But it's ok for me to wear the gay bracelet out so everyone can see, and
for you to wear it on your ankle?" I say getting pissed and I stop and he turns
towards me.
"Then take the fucking thing off Chase, I don't know what else to tell you
ok I panicked. I'm not good at being rude and just I don't know ok everything
is new for me." He says frustrated.
"How do you think I feel, it's not only her who thinks I'm trash Tanner!"
I yell at him angry now and I take the shirt he got me and toss it to him and
walk away from him trying my best not to cry.
"CHASE! Get back here now!" He yells at me and then grabs me by the wrist,
"don't walk away from me! Please I'm sorry ok I really am."
I just look at his hand around my wrist and he lets me go, "I think its
time to go, and you can take me home." I tell him
It takes about twenty minuets for Troy and Aaron to meet up with us, and
we start are way back to the car. They all talk and I just kind of listen and
nod and agree when I need to still extremely pissed off at how the whole day
turned out.
"Yo, Chasen why are you being a space case lately?" Aarons asks running up
to me.
"Just tired, I guess been along day." I lie to him and keep walking.
"Oh, That's a bummer are you coming back over to Tanners and Troy's?" He
asks and leans in closer so not to be overheard, "I like your bracelet a lot
too..." and goes red when he tells me.
"uhh...No I think Tanners going to drop both of ya'll back home and take me
home its kind of opposite of their house, and thanks" I give a weak smile and I
notice as soon as I said I wasn't going he looked like a lost puppy.
He looks down and kicks a rock as we walk along to the Escalade, "That
sucks it thought we could be cool I mean we are both the same and all..."
"Aaron your cool little dude man but I'm afraid that I'm not the best
person to look up to about this stuff man I don't even really know what I am." I
tell him and get into the car.
He looks hurt and I feel bad I know how he feels being that age and not
having anyone to talk to at that age, but I cant even figure my shit out I cant
try to help him when I cant do anything right myself.
The car ride was short I'm guessing because Tanner sped most of the way
still pissed off about me wanting to go home. We drop the other two off at the
house and we start off towards my house.
"Please stay." He asks
"No I just want some time ok. Besides you don't really know what you
want." I tell him
"I want you!" he tells me.
"Tanner just please, I cant be around you right now I am pissed and hurt
at the whole situation and its not you I'm pissed at its that bitch." I tell
him.
"Chase babe please let It go Kristy is a bitch, she thinks she can have me
but I am yours and no one else's." He tells me pleading with me and reaches to
grab my hand.
He pulls up to my house, it looks as dark and gloomy as ever. I look over
and he looks so sad, but I just need to think about everything I don't want to
hold him back.
"Please?" He begs.
"No babe." I tell him and look down.
He gets out and comes around to open the door and I smile and get out and
he gives me one of those kissed that make my knees go weak, "I'm so sorry babe
please forgive me and text me later."
I smile and kiss him back, "I will babe."
I watch as he gets back into the car and pulls off leaving me still
smiling and weak at the knees.
I look back at the house and I see the blinds move, "Fuck" I think this
isn't going to be great.
I slowly make my way to the door and its unlocked I enter the house
expecting to feel a hit but I don't. I see my mom leaning against the hallway
wall with a glass of alcohol in her hand, glaring at me with nothing but hate.
"Who was that? Your fairy boyfriend?" she spits out at me.
"Mom not today, I'm not in the mood for you shit!" I say walking past her.
That's when I feel her grab the back of my hair and throw me into the
wall. I hit it with a hard thud, and pain sears into my eyes making everything
blurry.
"DON'T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!" she yells and slaps
me in the face.
I slump down and try to cover my face, but she doesn't hit me again
instead she grabs me by my hair and drags me down the hall as I try and beg with
her to let go.
"WHERES YOUR LITTLE BOYFRIEND NOW? I SAW HIM KISSING YOU OUT THERE IN MY
YARD! MY YARD AND YOU THINK YOU CAN BE KISSING A BOY THERE?" she screams and I
feel the spit and the alcohol wash over me from her mouth. "TAKE OFF THAT
FAGGOTS SHIRT I KNOW ITS HIS, YOU DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF CLOTHING!"
Before I can take it off she grabs it and rips it off, and shoves me hard
into my dresser knocking over my lamp onto the floor shattering the light bulb.
"LOOK WHAT YOU DID NOW CLEAN THE SHIT UP!" she barks at me.
I crawl over to where the glass is and I start to pick it up when I hear
the "whoosing" sound in the air and I feel the sting of leather on my back!
"I WILL NOT HAVE A FAG IN MY HOUSE!" she screams as she swings the belt at
me again.
I feel it as it bites my skin and I let out a cry and she hits me over,
and over with it I feel it breaking my skin in places. I huddle up into the
fetal position to protect most of my body.
I lose count as how many times she has hit me I can't feel anything my
whole body is numb from the lashes of the belt and they stop. I look up and she
lashes out with the belt, and the buckle hits me in the face causing a gash on
my cheek I cry out in pain.
"Mom...please...stop...I'm sorry." I beg as I cry.
"Don't mother me I didn't raise a faggot, a piece of trash get up!" she
tells me and grabs me by the hair.
She drags me out into the hallway and throws me against the wall, and puts
her hand to my throat, "You listen you piece of shit I have had it with your
shit, you get out of this house at once and don't you think of coming back!" she
slurs at me and spits in my face and slaps me.
She drags me to the door and shoves me out of it causing me too fall back
tripping on the step and falling down them and I can hear my ankle snap, and I
wail out in pain and she shuts the door on me.
I crawl over to the other side of the fence by my house and I cry so hard, that
I need to calm down I tell myself. I dig in my pocket and find my phone it
isn't in the best shape but I dial Tanner's number.........
"Hey baby!" he answers.
I moan and let out a little cry, "Tan, please come get me, its bad I think
my ankle is broke, please it's bad and I am so scared." I start to cry.
"Oh God Chase, I'm on my way I will be there in five minuets stay right
where you are don't move!" he tell me and I hear tires peeling out as he hangs
up.
I look at the phone and it has blood on it from the gash on my cheek. I
try my best to wipe it off but it's no use I have little cuts all over me
bleeding from the belt.
My head pounds and my eyes wont stop blurring, the back of my head hurts
from where I hit the wall and I cant help but start to cry that she did this to
me all because of who I am. I try to calm down but the time it is taking Tanner
to get here seems like hours and I try not to let the sudden fatigue over take
me.
I feel someone shaking me, I look up and I see Tanner and the look on his
face is one of anger mixed with horror. He helps me to the SUV, and buckles me
up. Then he lays the seat back for me I moan.
"Babe its going to be ok the cuts aren't bad I'm taking you to my house
ok? To let my mom check you out, she used to be a nurse!" He tells me as he
peels out and takes off.
It takes us no time to get back to his house of course I really can't tell
due to the going in and out of consciousness. I feel him lift me out of the SUV
and carry me into the house.
"Oh God, Tanner! What happened to him?" I hear his mom say with a high
panic.
"Mom just please help me with him ok, I will explain soon!" Chasen Pleads
with her.
I feel them lay me on something soft and I hear Mrs. Margaret on the phone
pacing by me and her telling Tanner to get ice and bandages and yelling for Troy
to get ice and for Aaron to get a warm rag.
I see Tanner looking at me worried I try to smile but it kind of hurts I
just look at him trying to communicate that I'm going to be ok.
I feel Mrs. Margaret put the ice on my ankle and I moan out loud as she
presses in certain areas to ask if it hurts.
She explains that she has her family physician coming to the house to
check me out I try to tell her no, but she tell me not to argue that that's what
they pay the private family doctor for.
I look at her and grab her hand and tell her thank you and I start to cry
she looks at me sadly, "you're going to be ok honey."
I believe her I look at Tanner who isn't looking so hot himself and I try
to stay awake but the fatigue is just so much and I slowly let sleep take me...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That is chapter 4! Sorry it took awhile to get out I got sick over the weekend
and it stopped me from writing. Please keep the emails coming and I am going to
start to work on ch. 5 things can only go up for our boy Chasen, I tried a new
approach with the multi POVs going back and forth let me know how that worked
out. I promise ch. 5 will be a lot happier and who knows maybe more T and C
alone time!