Date: Sat, 15 Nov 2003 22:07:30 -0500
From: Mychyl Kime <jasani666@hotmail.com>
Subject: [Gay/Highschool] Dear Diary Series ch 9

Dear Diary
(c) 2002-2003 Mychyl Kime (KimeNet Corp.)

	This is a work of fiction, depicting teenage males in romance
and/or sexual positions. The people depicted in this story (to the best of
the author's knowledge) do NOT exist... in the rare case that they're based
on real people, the names HAVE been changed... not so much as to protect the
innocent as to spare the poor people listed within the unnecessary fame this
story might bring to them... not that I'm saying lots of people will read
this, or even people where I've lived, but there's always a slight chance...
And these events are, for the most part, all the imagination of the author,
although I've seen the events depicted many, many times. And by the way, the
places used within do exist, and are easily as evil as depicted herein...

	If you are under 18 years of age (or whatever the legal age in your
area is) you must leave. Of course, I can't very well make you leave... but
if you choose to stay, DON'T GET CAUGHT! It is neither my fault, nor the
fault of this wonderful site, if you get caught running around here.

	Also, if you are repulsed by the concept of homosexual romance
and/or sex, please feel free to leave at any time. In fact, now would be a
good time. But hey, it's your call, of course... I can't make you leave,
either... but if you choose to stay, feel free... who knows, you might even
change your mind! My only question is: why are you here if that's the case?

	This is a new story, completely independent of my older work; if
you are interested in that, it's in HighSchool/The_Dance. And please, do
not ask if The Road Ahead will be completed. It will not. In fact, if I can
sweettalk the wonderful people at Nifty into doing a favor for me, the token
trifle which is The Road Ahead (online) may be destroyed. I'll offer up the
rest of this, and the anticipated next two books, for it, in fact. >_>()

	Each chapter will be prefaced by a piece of the song "Dear Diary",
(c) 2000 Britney Spears, from her album "Oops... I Did It Again". I make
no misrepresentations to my ownership or rights to this song; however, I
am certain that Ms. Spears would not be so petty as to sue me for usage of
this song on a free forum, where I can gain no profit from using it.

	Please feel free to email me with your comments/suggestions. My
email is: jasani666@hotmail.com (my old ones were claimed by hostile
takeover, care of a hack/infection). Or, if you'd prefer, you can IM me
on the chance you catch me online (which is off and on, depending on the
time of day and whether or not I'm working that night...):

	AIM: DiosescoSinestre
	MSN: jasani666@hotmail.com
	Y!M: jasani669
	ICQ: 21009696
	IRC: (irc.nevernet.net room XYchat last I knew) WyldChylde
	XY!: WyldChylde *chat only now* JasaniAvatar *chat and profile*

	And now, without further delay:


	-*-	Chapter 9	-*-

		"Now I can't wait
		 To see that boi again..."
			-B. Spears, "Dear Diary"


	The rest of the day passed fairly uneventfully... for some reason,
I never saw Kev all day, but I didn't really care to see him, either, so I
wasn't too terribly worried. Zack and Johnny and I hung out during lunch,
and we waved to each other as I left campus towards my house, a little hurt
that they didn't decide to automatically come hang out with me, but at the
same time, I wasn't so sure I wanted company right now, especially since
right now my emotions were so raw from all the recent happenings, and since
I couldn't guarantee that my feelings for the two bois wouldn't overwhelm
me and take another shot at ruining our friendship... as I said, I didn't
want to chance losing them as friends, no matter how bad I wanted... felt
like I needed... a relationship with them... it just didn't seem worth it.

	As I got to my house, a sudden shiver worked its way up my spine,
and I noticed that my front door was standing partway open. Now, even
though I was in a hurry that morning, I was pretty damned sure I'd closed
and locked the door... so, there was no way it should be standing wide
open like it was. And immediately, fear kicked in.

	I edged through the door, looking around, trying to see if anyone
was inside, fear stilling my voice and causing my breath to come in short,
ragged bursts, which I stifled not too well, trying to force my body to
ignore the fear that was racking it. I made a complete circuit of the main
floor, not seeing anyone or any evidence of anyone anywhere downstairs,
and went to the staircase, climbing it as quietly as possible, just in case
there was someone there and I might be able to go unnoticed... ~Call the
police!~ my mind yelled at me, ~Someone broke into your house, you need to
call the cops, have them come out!~

	I reached the door to my room and looked inside, only to see that
someone was laying, face down, on my bed... and as I froze in shock to see
someone lying there, he rolled over to reveal it was Jimmy... but at the
same time, it almost seemed like it wasn't. Jimmy's hair, his honey-brown
locks always gelled and styled to perfection, hung limp and lifeless around
his face... his normally clean-shaven face, which was now heavily covered
in several days worth of stubble. But it wasn't just that it looked like
he hadn't been taking care of himself... it seemed like something, some
integral part of him, was missing, and I couldn't tell what, exactly, it
was...

	"Jimmy?" I called to him, trying to wake him from his apparent
slumber. "Jimmy, what's wrong? Where have you been?"

	"Avoiding you," he answered quietly, his voice a neutral mask of
indifference, though a single tear began to run a lonely course down his
overgrown cheek. "I... I love you, Sean, but I was too late to tell you...
you're with that bastard Kevin now, and now I can't be with you, it can't
happen, it would mean ruining what you have..."

	"Ssh," I quieted him, coming to sit next to him on the bed, not
quite daring to touch him, comfort him, but at the same time needing to
be close to him and quiet his pains and fears. "Me n Kev aren't together,
we screwed around a bit but that's it..." At that, he sat up quickly and
got off the bed, starting towards the bedroom door. "Wait, don't leave,"
I said quickly, grabbing him by his wrists and pulling him back to me...
and then I noticed his wrists. Covered in scars and cuts, some of them
healing already, others still fresh and oozing with his blood, all of them
a mute response to the unasked question of where he'd been since that
fateful first night...

	"What... the... fuck?" I asked him, changing my view to his face,
not sure what exactly to make of the apparent suicide attempts... "What in
Hell are you trying to do?"

	He tried to pull free, but I held onto his wrists, forcing him to
yank his arms out of my grasp, sending me flying across the room... then,
a sudden, exploding pain filled the back of my head, and darkness fell
across my vision, and I was certain that it was all over as the darkness
overtook me, sending me spiraling downwards into oblivion...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

To those of you who still read this story, even though there've been
gaping holes in the publishing timeline: Well, here we are, the moment
we've all been waiting for, the ultimate cliffhanger~!

For those of you who've jumped on the story more recently than all that:
Usually, I'm not this bad about keeping my stories updated (look at The
Dance, my old story, to see what I mean)... it's just been a VERY hectic
ride thus far, and it promises to get better from here on out... I've got
a good living arrangement, and that's why I keep posting sporadically was
because of bad living arrangements in the past.

SO, as soon as I get the next (final~!) chapter typed up, I'll post it...
normally, this being the final cliffhanger, I'd let my wonderful readers
wait a day or two, suffer in silence and all... but, being as I haven't
had posts to it in SO long, I think everyone's suffered enough as is.

ALSO, with the next chapter, I'll include a sample of the upcoming story
"Frozen" (Part 3 of the Ukiah Chronicles, with this being Part 2 and The
Dance, of course, Part 1)... which'll start once this one's finished.

Anywho, for now, so I can write s'more, I bid you all a fond adieu... as
always, fan mail, comments and (constructive) criticisms are welcomed...
my email's at the top, feel free to write~! (Include Dear Diary as part
of the email topic, so I don't think it's spam... I get a lot of spam
these days... -_-)

~X~ Mychyl ~X~