Date: Fri, 04 Mar 2005 16:58:20 -0700
From: Mychyl Kime <jasani666@hotmail.com>
Subject: Frozen (Chapter 3)

Frozen
(c) 2004-2005 Mychyl Kime (KimeNet Corp.)

	This is a work of fiction, depicting teenage males in romance
and/or sexual positions. The people depicted in this story (to the best of
the author's knowledge) do NOT exist... in the rare case that they're based
on real people, the names HAVE been changed... not so much as to protect the
innocent as to spare the poor people listed within the unnecessary fame this
story might bring to them... not that I'm saying lots of people will read
this, or even people where I've lived, but there's always a slight chance...
And these events are, for the most part, all the imagination of the author,
although I've seen the events depicted many, many times. And by the way, the
places used within do exist, and are easily as evil as depicted herein...

	If you are under 18 years of age (or whatever the legal age in your
area is) you must leave. Of course, I can't very well make you leave... but
if you choose to stay, DON'T GET CAUGHT! It is neither my fault, nor the
fault of this wonderful site, if you get caught running around here.

	Also, if you are repulsed by the concept of homosexual romance
and/or sex, please feel free to leave at any time. In fact, now would be a
good time. But hey, it's your call, of course... I can't make you leave,
either... but if you choose to stay, feel free... who knows, you might even
change your mind! My only question is: why are you here if that's the case?

	This is a new story, "completely independent" of my older work; if
you are interested in that, it's in HighSchool/The_Dance and HighSchool/
Dear_Diary_Series. (As it's been a while since I wrote those, you may need
to enter the addresses manually. Unless you like scrolling for a long time.
Conversely, the Search Page option in IE (dunno about the others) seems to
work nicely as well.) In all reality, while this IS an independent work,
there
may be some references in this story which corollate to the others, and if
you plan on reading all three (so far), you may wish to start with The
Dance.
That way, no spoilers. See?

	Please feel free to email me with your comments/suggestions. My
email is: jasani666@hotmail.com.  Or, if you'd prefer, you can IM me
on the chance you catch me online (which is off and on, depending on the
time of day and whether or not I'm working):

	AIM: AvatarSinestre
	MSN: jasani666@hotmail.com
	Y!M: pbw_darkscape
	ICQ: 21009696
	BLOG livejournal.com/users/jasaniavatar

	And now, without further delay:



~*~     Chapter 3     ~*~

I froze, in shock, as those words were uttered, not knowing precisely what
to
say or do. Tyler, however, drifted back to sleep, albeit somewhat fitfully,
a
sweet smile playing across his lips as he laid, sprawled out on my desk.

I quietly left my room, stepping out onto the back patio. My hands were
shaking uncontrollably as I reached into my pocket, fumbling at the lighter
and cigarettes within it. Gods, I'd never needed a cig so bad in my entire
life... I'd always figured that Tyler liked me as a friend or something, or
maybe even idolized me... but... had a crush on me? Loved me? These things
never crossed my mind, not even for a second. Until now.

As I stood there, trying to make some sense of it, or at least figure out
why
it was affecting me so badly, the phone rang, and when the answering machine
picked up, it was my mom. She left a brief message, telling me she was out
of
town on business, and that she'd be back in a couple of days. Nothing
terribly
out of the ordinary, aside from not knowing until now, but... it's not like
she had to tell me beforehand. She was the adult, after all, not me. I just
didn't expect it now, at the worst, or best, possible time...

Several anxious cigarettes later, and too tired for my mind to make any
sense
of it right then and there, I headed back to my room, planning on waking
Tyler
up and sending him home. Then, I saw him, having moved from the desk to my
bed
at some point, burrowed under the covers, the occasional light snore coming
from him. I decided, rather than disturb him, to let him sleep there, and
I'd
go sleep in my mom's bed instead. Especially since I preferred to sleep in
the
nude, and that would probably disturb him a LOT, no matter what his
sleep-heavy voice told me earlier.

Decision made, I stopped in the kitchen long enough to tell his mom that
he'd
fallen asleep, and he was staying over... yes, I'd make sure he was OK...
yes,
I'd make sure he'd eat... OK, love you too... and I was off to my mom's
room,
where I shut the door, stepped quickly out of my school clothes, and climbed
under her covers.

Focusing briefly on my dream, on the numbing ice, I shut my emotions, not to
mention my desire for Tyler, far away from me, and let myself drift off into
that peaceful icy dream, away from emotion, desire, and all else...

~*~

When I awoke, it was still dark, but I knew I was not alone in the bed. I
could feel someone's warm breath on the back of my neck, and small, warm
arms
were wrapped around my midsection, the hands idly and slowly tracing over my
chest, abs, softly stroking my bare flesh. Against my back, more bare flesh
pressed against me, and before I could react, I felt the bed shift, as
though
this other person was moving around. Holding perfectly still, not even
daring
to breathe, my eyes half-closed with sleep still, I felt the person...
Tyler... lean over me, lightly touching his moist lips to mine for only the
briefest of instants, as though trying to do so without awakening me... a
bit
too late for that, though he clearly didn't realize it.

His lips brushed mine again, and this time, I couldn't help but let out a
slight sigh, at which Tyler bolted up and away from my face, though his arms
didn't let go of me. Unsure of what to do or say, I only laid there still,
enjoying his presence and the feel of his warm, soft skin against mine,
afraid
that, to do or say anything might break this spell, and drive him away from
me. Which I knew was the last thing I wanted, especially since it would also
mean hurting Tyler.

Finally, after several moments of this sweet torture, I struck upon a plan.
Slowly, I started to stretch and squirm, as though just waking up, forcing
myself to move languidly enough that, if he didn't want to be discovered, he
would be able to get away "before I was awake". With a final kiss on the
back
of my neck, drawing a reflexive moan from my lips before I could stop it, he
pulled away from me and got up, leaving the room quietly but quickly, but
not
before I turned slightly, catching a flash of bare skin as he ran across to
my room and out of sight.

I stretched lazily, my heart still pounding from the all-too-brief contact
with him, and the warmth it brought me, half-wishing I'd continued to lie
there and enjoy it rather than chasing him away... but then, cold
realization
kicked in, destroying the warmth. I knew he'd be too afraid, afraid of me
doing or saying something, for anything to ever really come of it, this
brief
interlude the only exception. It wouldn't matter how I breached the
subject...
and at worse, he might say something to someone about it, just to keep
people
from figuring out his role in it!

I sighed, perhaps a bit too loudly, as I got up, for while I began to get
dressed, he walked up to the door and looked in at me... his eyes bulged for
a moment when he saw my naked body, then he recovered by averting his eyes,
taking off for my room practically in a dead run, mumbling an apology as he
went, closing the door behind him...

I hurried to finish getting dressed, and as soon as I was done, went over to
my room, opening the door and peeking in. "Tyler?" I said in a soft tone,
not
wanting to upset him further. He looked up at my face, blushing furiously,
but
didn't say anything.

"It's OK... we're both guys, right?" I said, trying to calm him down, get
him
from being so self-conscious. Granted, I wanted to go over and hold him, and
comfort him... but I knew that would only make matters worse, so I stopped
myself, just standing at the doorway.

Finally, he calmed back down a bit, though he wouldn't look at me more than
in glances, his eyes boring holes into the floor. I sat down at my desk,
since
he was seated on the edge of my bed, and glanced down at his homework,
staring
up at me, clearly nowhere near finished.

"Here, finish your homework... I'm gonna grab a cig, then I'll help you."

He nodded, and as I got up to leave, I glanced back to see him getting up,
apparently heading to the desk to do just as I suggested. I closed the door
softly behind me, walking back to the back door and letting myself out. This
had proved to be an interesting day... now, I just had to put it all into
perspective.

He couldn't love me... or if he did, he could never show it. He'd be far too
embarassed, one for what I might do or say if I "found out", and two... I
wasn't sure, but it seemed like he thought it was even worse that it was me,
since I'm quasi-related to him. Nor could I feel that way for him...
marriage
be damned, I didn't count him as a relative, more as an annoyance... but
now,
that was changing, and I was feeling for him... thinking of him as a friend,
and maybe a love...

I shut down that train of thought, calling the icefield to numb me against
feeling for him... it seemed I was doing that a lot lately, and it was
getting
less and less effective, but I didn't know any other way to stop the painful
feelings that could never, ever happen. No matter HOW much I wanted them to,
they just couldn't. It wasn't safe, and it wasn't fair that I had to worry
if
it was safe to love him... but that's just how it was. I hated it, but I
knew
that whether I liked it or not, it was still very painfully true.

The wind suddenly picked up, and with it, a brief chill blew across my back
yard, nearly freezing me with its force. Shivering heavily, I put out my
cigarette and went back inside, to find him sitting at the Playstation. With
a smirk, he looked back at me, apparently recovered from the incident, for
the
briefest of moments, before going back to his game. I chuckled, and walked
over to my usual chair, picking up the other controller. At least things
were
back to normal. Which, although I hated it, was the best I could ask for at
the moment. And I wasn't about to risk what I had... for what I wanted. No
matter how much I wanted to love him, and feel his love in return, I knew it
wasn't gonna happen.