Date: Mon, 22 Apr 2013 17:07:49 +0200
From: Nathan Pettersen <nathanpetersen14@gmail.com>
Subject: unbroken-04

Unbroken
By: Nathan Pettersen

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         Disclaimer: Well, here we go again with the disclaimer stuff. This
story is fiction. Any resemblance of it in your life is just coincidence.
Also, not much sex stuff is going on in here, so if you're only going to
read this because of that, then you might as well go. And of course the
undying theme, if you're disgusted by Boys love, or are underage, you might
as well go too. (I don't mind about the underage thing, if you want to read
this, I can't stop you.:))

         AND YOU GUYS! DON'T FORGET TO DONATE! IF YOU ALL ARE ENJOYING ALL
THE STORIES HERE AT NIFTY, SHOULDN'T WE AT LEAST CONTRIBUTE IN ORDER FOR
THE SITE TO BE HERE??? :D

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Unbroken Chapter 4: Lightweight

         Here I am, sitting at the back of the stage. The contest is
starting in 30 minutes and Denise is not here. She's supposed to be here
right now. Where is she? I've called her twice now and she's not picking
up. We've been practicing hard for this day. She has to be here. I can't do
this alone. What's her problem, though? Whatever it is, she's supposed to
be here. Damn, I have my own problems and I'm here for fucks sake.

~*~~*~2 weeks ago~*~~*~

          It's Friday and I'm on school. Finally, last day of school before
the weekend!! I met and had three friends today. This is improvement
because, well, I'm not that friendly. The only friends I've got since the
beginning is Denise and Daniel. Over the past week I've got Jonathan and
Henry too. See? I've only got four friends. Well, moving on. I met them at
English class today. We had to do a group activity and Mr. Orlando assigned
the groups, so I have no choice but to work with them. Well, I really
enjoyed working with them. They're so funny. Their names are Mike, Jessie
and Phillip. Mike is 6'3 and has blond hair. He's with the football team,
so I bet he knows Daniel. He's a hunk. But I can't tap that even if I can
cause he's with Jessie. Jessie though is such a geek. She's 5'10 and has
brunette hair with those geek glasses. They're so cute together. Jessie and
Lindsay are in the Math Club together. And then there's Phillip. He's 5'11
and has black hair. He's always quiet, but I got him to laugh. And trust
me, he has an infectious laugh. And that made me forget about my problem a
little. So now we had this one big group at the lunch table; Me, Denise,
Daniel, Jonathan, Henry, Lindsay, Mike, Jessie and Phillip. I think I just
came out of my shell. I can't believe I can socialize like this. (You guys,
this is important, over the past years I only got Denise and Daniel, and I
think it's time for a change.)
         I've been hanging out with Jonathan lately. I ran out of reasons
not to hang out with him. He's so persistent. Last Tuesday we went to the
arcade. And last Thursday we went to the movies and watched `This Means
War'. I kind of regret the days when I say no to his invitations. I have so
much fun every time we hang out. But at the same time there's the feeling
that I should have just continued saying no to him. I think I'm falling for
him even more. The way he talks, the way he laughs, everything he does is
just so fucking great. It's so easy to fall for him actually. I wonder why
he doesn't have a girlfriend. I don't want him to have a girlfriend. I want
him all for myself. Well, this is bad. I can't do this. I like to have his
friendship, but I want more. I can't just see his greatness everyday and do
nothing about it. I want to hold him, to touch him, to kiss his lips and
everything. But I can't do that. I don't even know how he will react if he
finds out that I'm gay. Imagine him finding out that I'm gay AND I have
feelings for him. He would so freak and tell me that I have to stay away
from him. So I have three choices. Tell him my I'm gay and I have feelings
for him, don't tell anything at all and stay friends or just avoid him
completely. The first choice is so not happening. But I don't know which is
the hardest, choice number 2 or choice number 3. Either way, I have to do
something. I can't stay like this forever. This is tearing me up
completely.
         After school I went to the mall with Mike, Jessie and Phillip. I
asked Lindsay to come, but she said that she have to come home early, so
maybe next time.  I got tired of going to the mall with Denise and
Daniel. I am really just a third wheel for those two. It's good to change a
little.
         "Are you ok, Adrian?" Jessie asked. It seems that they sensed my
quietness.
         "Yeah, I'm okay" I replied. I really don't want to bother them
with my problems since I just met them today.
         "Are you sure?" she asked again.
         "Yeah, don't worry about me, okay?" I said.
         "Sure." Jessie replied. By that I was alone in my own thoughts
again.

         After the mall, I said goodbye to them and went to Denise's house
to plan what song to sing in the contest. It's in about two weeks. So we
better hurry to decide which song and prepare everything. After a long
discussion with her and Daniel, we finally decided which song to sing. All
I've got to do is to learn to play it in the guitar. And we can practice
with it. The song was Daniels idea. He heard Denise singing it once and he
totally loved it. The song is really good. It's about being vulnerable when
falling in love. I've listened to it and fell in love with it. I think
we're going to do well in that concert.

         I went straight to my room when I came home. I just want to lie on
my bed and fall asleep. I'm still can't figure out what to do with this
thing with Jonathan. I can't escape this feeling now. I've fallen deeply in
love with him. I don't know what to do. If I stay friends with him, it'll
just hurt. If I avoid him, it'll hurt too. This is just so hard. Somebody
help me, please! I felt so helpless by these things, that I just started
crying. I don't even know when I fell asleep. But I was sure with one
thing, I fell asleep crying.

          I woke up with a headache. I was so glad that it was Saturday
today, wondering why? I look like a mess. My eyes are so red. If I had
school I wouldn't have come. I should change the covers of my bed too. It's
wet from the crying I did last night. Damn I did a good number of crying
huh? I looked around in my room and noticed that it was really messy. It's
time for me to clean up. Have to get off my mind with this problem I'm
having.
         It's been two hours since I started cleaning up my room. God, it
was such a mess. But everything's clear now. I changed my sheets and
everything. My room is spotless. I need a bath though. I'm really a mess
right now. I went to the bathroom and took a shower. When I came back to my
room, I checked my phone and noticed two missed calls and one message. It
was all from the same person, Jonathan. I opened the message and he was
asking me if I can come and hang out at his house today. I just replied
that I can't and turned my phone off. I just can't face him right now. I
guess I'll just avoid him for now. I'm such a coward. But what can I do?
Every time I see him and thinking that I can't ever have him, it'll just
hurt me more that I'm hurting now. I guess one sided love really is
hurtful.
         I continued to ignore Jonathan the next week. I didn't answer his
calls, never replied to his texts and ignore him at school. By Wednesday I
think he got the idea that I don't want to hang out with him anymore, and
he just backed off. If you just have seen the look on his face the last
time he asked me to hang out and I said no. It's.. heart breaking. I can't
believe how selfish I'm being right now. I feel really bad. But what am I
suppose to do? I can't just like turn off what I'm feeling and get back to
the way it's supposed to be. What I'm doing is for the best, right? But,
why does it hurt even more?
         It's now Friday and I'm at Denises' house. We're practicing for
the contest. It's going to be on Monday. So we only have two days to
rehearse. I learned how to play the song on the guitar last Wednesday, and
we've been practicing after school since. I still feel guilty about the way
I've treated Jonathan. I feel sorry for him, but I can't turn back down
now. I guess Denise notice that I was being quiet that usual, since she
asked me if I was okay.
         "Yeah, I'm fine. Just nervous is all" I answered.
         "Nervous? Since when have you been nervous? I think it's something
else." she retorted.
         "Yeah. I guess you're right" she really can read me.
         "Want to tell me about it?" she asked and I just broke down. I
guess I've been holding it and can't take it anymore. Denise came to me and
gave me a hug.
         "What's wrong?" she asked.
         "I should have listened to you. I fell for him" I said.
         "Oh, Adrian" she just hold me there and comforted me. It began to
feel awkward so I said to her that we're done for today and I'll come
tomorrow for more practice. She just nodded her head and told me that I
would be okay. I hope so, because it's beginning to hurt so much. When I
came home I receive a message from Jonathan:
         "What did I do to you for you to ignore me like this?"  I just
started crying again. I'm sorry Jonathan. I'm really sorry.
         The next day I woke up with a headache again. I don't want to
leave my bed for now. So I just took my iPod and listened to some
songs. Then Adele's `Someone Like You' came on. And I couldn't help but
sing along. When I finished singing the song I looked at the door and saw
that Denise was standing by the door.
         "DENISE!" I screamed. Nobody has heard me singing before. I was so
embarrassed.
         "Wow. Your voice is really great." She told me.
         "Stop it. What are you doing here?" I asked.
         "Well, by the things that went on yesterday. I think my bestfriend
needs me right now." she said. I just stood up and gave her a hug.
         "Thank you" I said.
         "You're welcome. Daniel wanted to come too, but they have practice
today. When I told him yesterday he wanted to come over right then. I just
told him that you needed some time alone."
         "You guys are the best, you know that?" I told her.
         "I know. Don't forget that when you're down, we're here to catch
your sorry ass." She smiled at me. We just goofed around and stuff in my
room. By 1 pm Daniel came over too. I was greeted by a big hug from him.
         "Are you okay? I knew something was wrong with you since the other
day. You seemed off that day." he told me.
         "I know, sorry for lying. I just don't want to bother you guys. I
don't want you to worry for me." I said.
         "That is just plain wrong. When you are having a problem, just
talk to us. That's what best friends are for, right?" he asked. I'm out of
words, so I just gave him a hug.
         We just hang out that day in my room. We watched a movie, goofed
around and all. Its fun that I got to spend my day like this, but the
feeling is still there.


~*~~*~~*~~*~

          We're the third one that's going to perform and she's still not
picking up. The contest will start in a minute. She needs to be
here. Suddenly my phone started ringing. It was Denise.
         "Where are you?" I asked.
         "Sorry, Adrian. But I won't make it. My dad has been rushed in the
hospital and I have to be here." she said.
         "What? I'm sorry for your dad but, what am I going to do now?" I
asked.
         "I.. called somebody who can help. He's supposed to be there now."
she said.
         "So he can sing the song" I asked.
         "Um... not really. He's going to play the guitar. And you're going
to sing." She said.
         "WHAT?" I screamed at her. I can't sing in front of them all. I
just can't.
         "You have to do this, Adrian. This is the best that I can do. I'm
just really lucky that he can play the song on the guitar. And I know your
voice is good. So there shouldn't be a problem." She told me.
         "Fine, I'll do it. Who's this guy that you're talking about?" I
asked. Suddenly there's somebody who's tapping my shoulder. I turned around
and it was Henry.
         "Hi. So did Denise tell you about the arrangement?" he asked.
         "Denise. I'll talk to you later. And I mean TALK." By that I hang
up the phone.
         "Hey, Henry. Sorry for dragging you in this." I said to Henry.
         "It's ok. Nice choice of song by the way. That's my favorite song
off the new album of hers." He told me.
         "Thanks. Are you ready? We're contestant number 3, and it seems
like they started already." I said.
         "I'm ready. Let me just set up my guitar. Are YOU ready?" he
asked.
         "Ye... No, not really. This is the first time I'm singing. I was
fine when I was the one playing the guitar. But then I have to do this." I
told Henry. He came to me and gave my head a rub.
         "Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be fine. We have to get ready
though. The first performer just finished. After the second one is us."
         "Okay. Let's go" I don't know why, but I kind of relax a
little. Weird.
          And now here I am, standing in front of the whole crowd. I'm
nervous as hell. There are so many people in here. I think I'm going to
faint. I looked at Henry and he just nodded and started playing the
guitar. I can do this. Inhale. Exhale. You can do this, Adrian. You can do
this.

"The slightest words you've said, have all gone to my head I hear angels
sing, in your voice When you pull me close, feelings I've never known They
mean everything, and leave me no choice"

I sang. Suddenly I wasn't nervous anymore. I really am singing in front of
everybody.

"Light on my heart, light on my feet Light in your eyes, I can't even speak
Do you even know how you make me weak?"

Suddenly I saw something in the crowd that made my heart stop. It was
Jonathan. He was looking at me. I can't help but look at him too.

"I'm a lightweight, better be careful what you say With every word I'm
blown away, you're in control of my heart I'm a lightweight, Easy to fall
easy to break With every move my whole word shakes, keep me from falling
apart"

I didn't break off my stare at Jonathan. I wish I could just tell him how I
feel. Why does it have to be so hard?

"Down drowned in your love, it's almost all too much Handle with care, say
you'll be there.  I'm a lightweight, better be careful what you say With
every word I'm blown away, you're in control of my heart I'm a lightweight,
Easy to fall easy to break With every move my whole word shakes, keep me
from falling apart" (Demi Lovato – Lightweight)

         The crowd started clapping like crazy. So I just took Henry's hand
and we bowed. I looked for Jonathan but he was gone. I wish he should have
stayed. This is all my fault. But this is the point right, to push him
away? So I should be happy. But why does it hurt this much?

         The contest went on, and we won second place. So cool! Henry
offered to drive me home, but I declined. I really want to be alone right
now. I was on my way to the bus station when somebody grabbed my hand. It
was Jonathan.
         "Adrian, please, just talk to me. I really don't know what I've
done. Please, just listen." He pleaded.
         "Umm.. Okay. But please, let me go. It hurts." I told him.
         "Sorry. But why are you avoiding me? We were just having fun the
other day. Remember the arcade, and the movies? I just don't get it.
Explain it to me, and I promise I'll leave you alone." He said.
         I just don't care anymore. He wanted explanation? He'll get it. I
want this to be over with. I don't care if he ends up hating me. "Do you
really want to know? You'll probably end up hating me, but if you really
want to know, then okay. I like you, and I mean really like, like you. I
like you so much that I can't stand being around you because it hurts so
fucking much. Because knowing that I can't have you the way I.." I was
interrupted when Jonathan did the best thing I ever wanted him to do. He
kissed me. His lips are so good. I was so captivated by it. I was in trance
when he suddenly let go of me.
         "I'm sorry. I can't help it. You were just so cute that I had to
do it. You should have just told me, I would have.." it was my time to
interrupt him. I kissed him with all my might. I can't believe this is
happening. The one thing that I ever wanted, wanted me back.

         To be continued...

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Well. THERE YOU GO. I knew you wanted for Adrian and Jonathan to be
together. So there! Are y'all happy? Chapter 5 will take longer than
expected though. I have some ideas on what it'll be about. Like, what if it
was all just a dream? Hahahaha. No, I wouldn't do that. You all will get
pissed at me. I'll be busy these next few months. So it'll take a while
before I can post it. I hope you guys will wait for it. Hehehe :D

See you guys again soon. And don't forget to email me and tell me what you
guys think: nathanpetersen14@gmail.com. I really appreciate the comments I
get. :D

A million hearts, You're the only one.
Who lights me up, like I'm glowing in the dark.