Date: Wed, 09 May 2001 03:21:39
From: Flash F. <flash_f_@hotmail.com>
Subject: when's-it-my-turn (Gay, Highschool) part 2

Disclaimer: If you don't want to read a story with some homosexual
content...don't.

I'll try to make this one a little longer then the last...the last part was
just a kind of a "spur of the moment" thing and I just gave it my best. I
hope you like this one better.


I don't think I sat still that whole morning. What did Dan want? What did
he call ME for? I mean, it's me! I'm an outcast, I'm different, I ENJOY
reading, and I'm not exactly the best catch in school...from any point of
view.

I kept glancing over at Dan during lunch. He was usually a happy perky
person with always a smile on his face. He looked so sad today. Like
someone ripped his heart right out of his chest. I just wanted to get up
and give him a hug, tell him everything would be ok. Tell him exactly how I
felt and longed for him and his company... but I knew that wasn't possible.

"What's wrong with you?", Garrett said plopping down next to me.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you.", I said still staring at Dan.

"Try me.", He simply said as he took a bite out of his sandwich.

"Dan called me last night." I heard a little cough then saw Garrett
struggle to cough out his piece of sandwich.

"What's the matter with you?!", I said laughing.

"You're right, I DON'T believe you.", he said regaining some senses.

"Well...the only other time I can think you thought I lied to you is when I
came out to you...remember?"

"...Wow you are telling the truth.", he said with his own little "joke"

"Yeah I really am.", I said turning back to Garrett.

"Well what did he say?"

"I was really tired. But I can remember "I really need to talk to you." and
that's about the jest of it."

"But why would a hot skater boy like Dan want to talk to you? I mean, um.."

"You mean an outcast?", I said grinning.

"Well yeah.", he replied.

"I don't know...That's the scary part."  BIIIIIIING went the tone. Lunch
was over.

I don't think I heard a single word during the rest of my classes. I mean,
could you blame me? Finally the final tone came at the end of 8th period. I
practically floated up the stairs to Dan's locker.  I waited there a few
minutes; just watching the other "popular" kids chatting about their
mindless drabble. "I'm going out with so-and-so" and "did you catch that
new Shaggy song?" BLAH! Finally, Dan came strolling up. God, he is so
beautiful I thought to myself. He stood about 5' 11" (Well short of
me...but then again so are most people), about 135 lbs, brown hair with
blond dye streaks running through parts of it, and the deepest brown eyes,
the kind you can look into forever without getting bored. Eyes are
important. They show so much without actually speaking. The single greatest
thing on the human body. And since he was a skater type, he was always
working out, which helped him out a lot too. I mean, this was one HOT
boy. Not to mention sweet, caring, and loveable...am I dragging this out?
I'm sorry.

"Hey Dan, what's up?", I questioned.

"I'm glad you showed up!", he said smiling for the first time today.

"Well, you seemed pretty upset last night, it would be pretty rude of me
not to eh?", I said. DAMN! I hate it when that slips out. I can't help
it...once in a long while the old eh?'s come out.

"You from Canada eh?", he said smiling.

"Na...hey shut up!", I said smiling.

"But no, seriously, I'm glad you showed up. I really need to talk to you."

"Um ok."

"You think we could go someplace...you know private?"

"Yeah that's fine with me."

"Thanks... this is kinda hard on me. Is your house ok?"

"Na, my mom is always home...not exactly a lot of privacy with her around."

"Understood," he replied. "My house?"

"Yeah sure thing."

"Great!", he said with that killer smile...I could have melted right there.
Soon we were off. Talking about this and that. Sports, school, bitchy
teachers, homework, the usual. As we got to his house about 10 minutes
later, a familiar face stepped out on the porch. It was Mike, Dan's dad. I
couldn't believe it! We've spoken many a time at church; I had no idea that
he was Dan's father!

"Daniel, I have to work late tonight, I just came back for an early
supper. Stuff is in the fridge ready to be re-heated... Oh hey Jason!
What's up man?", Mike was always cool like that. A guy you could tell
anything. Well, almost anything.

"Not much! I didn't know Mike um.. your Dad..uh." Dan started to laugh.

"Yeah, a lot of people don't know it. But yep, this goofy bald guy is my
dad!"

"Hey! I'm not bald...ok shut up, that's low", he said smiling. "Well I'm
off, you kids have fun."

"Bye Mike."

"See ya Dad." We said in unison.

We walked into Dan's living room. Wooden floors and fairly nice
furniture. Not bad I thought.

"Sit down wherever. I'll be right back. You want a coke or something?"

"Sure.", I said. He then ran off into the kitchen while I plopped down on
the couch. I started to look around. A normal living room I thought.
Pictures of Dan, Mike Jr., Mike, television, end tables...the usual. Dan
came back about 5 minutes later with cokes in hand. Okay...Unless this was
a joke I had to know now.

"Dan?"

"Yeah?", he said in a quiet voice.

"Why do you want to talk to me?", I said.

"...Why not? You're a nice guy...and I know that you heard everything
between me and Mallory...I figured we could talk."

"But why me? We barely know each other? Sure we've chatted a few
times...but nothing more."

"I know...but I have my reasons."

"And what's that?"

"Jason, I'll be honest. I know you're gay."  WHAT?! How the hell did he
find this out? I've only told 4 people and how...HOW did he know? I
struggled to speak.

"W-w-w-ho told you that?", I said with some fear in my voice.

"Well,", he began kind of smiling. "You're constantly looking at me, making
sure you get next to me some how with seating arrangements in school...and
just by the way you look at me. It isn't hard to tell that you're either
gay or bi at least."

"So...know one told you?"

"Nope, well you just right now.", he said grinning.

"Okay, we've established the fact that I'm gay...but why do you want to
talk to me?"

"Well, you heard why Mallory got so pissed at me."

"I didn't want to bring that up...but...is it true? Did Bryan give you
head?" Dan just kind of looked at the floor when I said that. He had that
helpless look in his eye again. Even more then that...he started to cry.
"Oh geez, man I'm sorry, I should go I didn't mean to..."

"Yeah he sucked me off.", he said cutting me off. "I didn't want to let
him, I mean, sure he's kind of cute and all but he's just my friend...I did
it out of lust and I feel like shit for doing it."

"You think Bryan is cute?", I said wide-eyed.

"Who wouldn't?", Is all I could make out. He started to cry again. I put
down my coke and scooted closer to him and put my arm around him.

"Dan it's okay. I mean you got a blowjob from a friend and your girlfriend
found out. It's not big deal really, I mean, Bryan IS cute but...Dan?"

"Yeah, Jason?", he looked up to me in his bloodshot eyes.

"Dan, do you think you might be gay?"

"There is no "might" about it...I'm a fucking faggot!", and that's when he
lost it. He came up and threw his arms around me and started to cry very
heavily into my shoulder. All I could do was sit there and hold him.

"Shh...It's okay, it's okay.", I said softly into his ear.

"M-m-mallory knows, she'll tell the whole fucking school and I'll never be
able to show my face again."

"Dan, look, it's okay really. If you need someone to talk to, you know
where to turn now. I'm always here for you. I'll do anything you want,
please just tell me!", I started to cry myself.

"J-j-just hold me..please don't let go.", he wrapped his arms around me
tighter.

"Of course I will, I'll never let go.", I said into his ear.


________________________________________________________________________



We must have fallen asleep on his couch. I woke up and it was getting dark
outside. Dan had his head on my chest, breathing softly. His arms hung
around my sides. I felt so sorry for him.  I knew how hard it was to come
out to someone. I had even thought about committing suicide many
times...even tried it once. Now I think it's time to bring my music
up. Music did save my life. One song in particular. "Call And Answer" by
the Barenaked Ladies.


I think it's getting to the point
where I can be myself again
I think it's getting to the point
where we have almost made amends
I think it's the getting to the point
that is the hardest part.

And if you call, I will answer
and if you fall, I'll pick you up

and if you court this disaster
I'll point you home


Great lyrics eh? Ack! I did it again!


"Dan?" He was sound asleep. It was kind of cute actually. I had a little
bit of drool on my shirt from where his mouth was. I kind of giggled to
myself as I saw it.

"Dan?", I said out-loud again. No response. I gave his shoulder a little
rub and pushed a little bit. Ah! Some sort of life.

"Yeah?", he said as he brought his arms tight around me again.

"As much as I'm enjoying this, it's starting to get late."

"What time is it?", he said into my shirt.

"Almost 7:30 and you're drooling on my favourite shirt."

"You like it and you know it.", he said into my shirt, you could actually
feel his smile.

"Yeah, I do, but I better at least call my mom to let her know where I am."
from there he let go and started to get up. He looked so cute with his hair
messed up.

"Wait a second, I'll get you the phone."

"Okay.", I said smiling. He came back a few moments later with the phone in
hand. I dialed my house and my mother answered on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Mom, it's me."

"Where have you been!? I've been worried sick!"

"Don't worry I've just been at a friends house, got carried away and I just
forgot to call."

"Okay...but PLEASE make sure you call sooner next time. So like are you
staying the night there? Do you want me to come pick you up?"

"Hold on a sec."

"Okay."

"My Mom wants to know if I'm staying the night or going home.", I told Dan.

"I want you to stay...let me call my Dad quick."

"Hey Mom, let Dan call his Dad real quick ok?"

"Okay, Bye."

We hung up, then I handed the phone over to Dan. His Dad said yes but as
long as we go to bed at a decent hour. He had to work late (again).

"Yeah it's cool with my Dad." I called my Mom back, told her it was cool,
then told her I loved her.

"Awww isn't that sweet?", Dan joked as I hung up with my mom.

"Yeah yeah shut up.", I said smiling back at him. He then got serious again

"Are you surprised to find out I'm gay?"

"Yeah Dan, I really am. I would have never guessed.."

"Well..it's true. I just need someone right now who knows what I'm going
through."

"Well I'm your man."

"I hope so...", he trailed off. OH MY GOD. I think Dan actually LIKES ME.

"Dan?"

"Yeah...I like you."

"But why! You hardly know me! All I ever talk about is music and books! I'm
an outcast and you're WAAAY popular and I'm a social outcast! Why the hell
would you..."

"SHUT UP!", Dan shouted. I have to admit, that really caught me off
guard. "Man, NONE of that matters to me."

"But what about the "The whole school will know I'm a fucking faggot"
thing?"

"Who said we have to tell them? I mean, I'm not going to ditch you at
school or anything. Don't worry, you`re my boyfriend."  My head was getting
all dizzy. This had to be a dream. This CAN'T be happening to ME! I looked
into his deep brown eyes. I could tell he was being truthful.

"Boyfriend?", I said with a little laugh.

"If you want. You're a great guy, people just don't know you at all. And
I'd like to know everything."

"If I want? Of course I'll be your boyfriend!", I was so happy right now,
this had to be a dream! I started to even tear up because I was so happy.

"Aw man don't cry, you're going to make me cry!" But it was too late he
started to too. We both kind of laughed and then brought each other close
for a warm embrace. This has to be the greatest feeling in the world I
thought to myself. We pulled away from our warm embraced then looked into
each other's eyes. We slowly came closer together, and then we kissed very
softly on the lips then pulled back away.  He then put his head back on my
chest and we both fell back down on the couch. I think I'm falling in love.



Woo! Bad place to leave you hanging I know, but I gotta stop someplace!

As usual, comments, suggestions? Criticism? E-Mail me at
flash_f_@hotmail.com I'm trying to respond to all of the first ones, thanks
for all of the support!