Date: Thu, 7 Jul 2005 16:07:36 -0700 (PDT)
From: Guy Smith <nvwriter2000@yahoo.com>
Subject: Ancestor's Diary

This story is not true. Forgive me for not always
writing in proper historical language.

Hank Jefferson was excited about a recent find in a
trunk that had belonged to his grandfather. He had
found an old journal that had belonged to an ancestor.
The name one the outside of the tattered journal was
Oliver Jefferson IV.

It didn't take long for Hank to sit down and begin
reading the diary--

"My name is Oliver Jefferson, the fourth. I write this
diary for no one other than myself. I am 69 years old,
set to turn 70 in just a few days. I often think back
on a time in my life when I was the happiest, yet at
the same time it was a very sad time in my life. I try
not to think about a certain person I knew, but if I
were to be honest with myself I think about him every
day, many times a day. If I could see him today I
would tell him that I don't regret knowing him. Yet, I
am full of regret. Regret for not being stronger,
regret for not being a real man, regret for letting
him out of my life.

My father, Oliver Jefferson, the third, was a slave
owner. I was raised in a cotton plantation. As I grew
up I though nothing of owning slaves, it was what I
knew. Then the real world invaded my idyllic life. I
learned about the people who didn't believe in
slavery, who wanted to abolish slavery. My father of
course hated the idea of freeing slaves. I didn't
necessary hold one viewpoint or another, but I did
begin to look at slaves in a different light.

I was 20 years old when things really began to change.
My father had began to prepare me to take over the
plantation. I was an only child and my parents had me
late in life. My father was getting old and ready to
take a less active role in the plantation.

My parents wanted me to settle down, get married and
take over the plantation. Trouble is, I didn't want
any of that. I had no interest in taking over the
plantation and letting it run my life as it had my
father's and his father before him.

As for the other things my parents wanted, marriage to
a good woman and children, I wasn't necessarily
interested in that either. Not that I didn't like
girls, I had kissed a few. But at 20 I was still a
virgin. I was good looking and more than a few parents
wanted me to take their daughters, but no woman really
grabbed my attention. They seemed flighty and stupid
and not worth the challenge they came with.

Around that time my father purchased a new batch of
slaves from a plantation owner in another state. I was
there when the slaves were brought in. One of them
caught my attention the moment I saw him.

He was very tall, at least 6'5" and very large. There
wasn't an ounce of fat on him. He wasn't wearing a
shirt the first time I saw him and was wearing a pair
of tattered pants. He was covered in muscles, his arms
and his legs bulged. His hair was long and black and
very mussy. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He
caught me staring at him. He met my gaze and didn't
look away until he was ordered to the slave shacks.

I immediately began asking about the new slave. My
father was thrilled I was taking an interest in the
plantation. I learned the slave was named Joshua and
was probably around 25 years old.

Father was even more ecstatic when I offered to
supervise the fields for several days while he was out
of town. He might not have been so thrilled to learn
that I just wanted to stare at the tall black man. The
idea that I was a homosexual had not occurred to me. I
just knew that I liked looking at him. I liked his
shiny black chest as he worked in the hot sun and I
desperately wanted to see what swung between his legs.

Slave owners could pretty much do what they wanted
with their slaves. My cousins had bedded down with
young slave girls more than once. I wanted to see
Joshua without clothes, but was afraid doing anything
in the open could label me as a miscreant or pervert.

After several days of watching Joshua work, I decided
I had to do something. I was hoping that by seeing him
naked I could put all my lustful thoughts behind me
and move on. That wasn't too happen, however.

At some point during the day I asked Joshua to follow
me to the wood shed. It was private there with no one
around. We stepped into the nearly empty shed and away
from the door.

"Take your pants off," I ordered.

"Sir?" he replied. Joshua had been given some
education by his prior master and spoke much better
than most slaves.

"Take off your pants, Joshua," I repeated myself.

"Why, sir?"

"Just obey me," I ordered again.

Joshua complied and took off his pants. He wasn't
wearing any undergarments and his black manhood
flopped out. I stared in awe at the massive elephant
trunk Joshua had between his legs.

His large penis seemed gigantic compared to the others
I had seen. To be fair I had only seen a few; mine, of
course, my father's when we would relieve ourselves in
the woods, and my cousins when we had urinating
contests as teens. Joshua beat all of those, quite
easily.

His cock was around six inches long and very thick.
The head of his pecker was large and round and he
hadn't been circumcised. He was soft as I first looked
at him and the shroud reached around his pecker. As we
stood there not saying anything, he began to grow and
soon his penis was hard and the skin was pulled back.
He had a set of big, hairy testicles that hung low.

"Sir?" he said. "Do you want me to do anything?"

I awoke from my astonishment and ordered him to put
his pants back on and return to the field. He did as
he was told and he left me alone. My own penis was
throbbing and I dropped my pants, pulled out my own
five inch pecker, quite small compared to his, and
engaged in some "self-mutilation", as my mother had
called it one time. I shot my cum and quickly dressed
and return to the field.

When Father returned he told me that I needed to take
a trip to take care of business for him. I objected,
but he insisted. I was soon preparing for the week
long trip to my destination. My father said I would
need a slave to drive the coach because his driver
wouldn't be able to do it. I chose Joshua right away.

We drove during the day and slept at night. I slept in
the coach while Joshua slept outside with a blanket.

On our second day we were crossing a small creek that
had been filled with water due to a recent rain storm.
The water became too strong for the wheels and the
coach fell apart. Both Joshua and I were dumped in the
cold water and the current began to take me
downstream.

As I was taken downstream, I bumped my head on a large
rock. I lost consciousness. The rest of what happened
I remembered at a later date.

Joshua managed to grab me before I drowned and he
pulled me from the water. We were both totally wet.
All our clothes were also drenched and the coach was
destroyed. Joshua hauled me and some bags into a
nearby cave. He then started a fire to get us warm.

I was shivering and had a bad chill and a fever.
Joshua stripped us both and lay all our clothes near
the fire. He laid me by the fire as well, but I
couldn't stop shivering. I was in and out of
consciousness and babbling incoherently.

Joshua became worried for me and realized he had to
keep me warm or I was going to die. The large man
picked me up, and pulled me close to his body. He was
sitting against the wall of the cave and he sat me on
his lap, wrapping his arms around me and pressing our
chests together.

Joshua begged me to be okay, he said he didn't want me
to die. I awoke somewhat at some point and told Joshua
that I didn't think I was going to make it. Joshua
grabbed the sides of my head and told me not to die.
Our faces were less an inch away from each other and I
could feel his hot breath on my lips. I moved forward
and placed my lips against his. Joshua didn't resist
at all, instead he pressed his lips to mine and kissed
me hungrily. I felt my own penis respond and then his
did too.

I could feel his massive cock on the outside of my
bare ass. As we kissed his hips moved, rubbing his
cock against the crack of my bum.

I reached around me and grabbed his large pecker. I
lifted my hips just enough to put his cock on the
outside my butt hole. I then tried to sit back down
and guide the pecker into me. Between me being a
virgin and him having such a large cock it wasn't an
easy feat, but Joshua didn't resist.

He grabbed my hips and held me in mid air as he began
to slide into me. Finally, his massive dick head broke
past my assring. I howled at the pain and tried to get
away, but Joshua held me there.

"No, sir," he said. "You ain't getting away. You
wanted it, I'm gonna give it to you."

I stopped fighting as the pain went away. Joshua
didn't move for the longest time and then he began to
slide into me more and more. Soon there was no pain at
all and his entire cock was deep in me. The wonderful
feeling of being poked engulfed my body and I just sat
on his dick moaning.

"It feels good, don't it,sir?" he asked and I said
that it did.

Joshua slid in and out of me first slowly then quicker
and then slowly again. The feeling of his massive cock
pushing into me made me lose it after a bit. I stroked
my cock and shot my juice onto his stomach. He pulled
me close and we kissed rubbing the semen into our
stomachs. Then Joshua really started to fuck me hard.
He poked me fast, hard and quick. Soon I felt his body
tensing up and he moaned as he came deep in my bowels.

We kissed again, both breathing heavily.

I leaned against his body and fell asleep feeling
nothing but his cock beginning to soften.

I continued to be in and out of consciousness for the
next several days. I didn't fully wake up until I was
in the hospital with my parents standing over my
bedside. They told me that Joshua had managed to flag
down a person riding on horseback and got me to
safety. They said Joshua had saved my life.

At that point I had no real memory of what had
happened in the cave between Joshua and I. I had a few
flashes and my butt ached like it had been invaded by
a wooden post.

I soon went home and was happy to see Joshua had been
given a position in the house, rather than in the
field. I thanked him for saving my life and he said it
was just the right thing to do.
Then my mind began to play games with me. Every time I
would see Joshua I would see us kissing. Then I
remember feeling his cock deep in me. Weeks later I
finally remembered everything that had happened.

I soon confronted Joshua privately and asked him if he
had fucked me as I was feverish. He quickly
apologized. He said he hadn't fully realized how out
of it I was, but also that he thought it was the only
way to make me warm. I told him I wasn't angry.

I also asked Joshua if he had done that before. He
admitted he had been with many men since he was a
teenager. He said he enjoyed it.

With Joshua being in the house, I got to see him much
more often. I often called him to my room at night
requesting something. When we would get to my room I
would throw aside my blanket to reveal my naked body.
I would spread my legs, he would crawl between them
and slide his penis deep into my ass and plant his
seed in me. We became lovers and I fell very much in
love with him. When I confessed that I had fallen in
love with him, he told he had known that for a long
time.

I soon realized that slavery was wrong. I tried to get
my father to release several slaves, including Joshua,
into freedom, but he refused.

One night Joshua came to me and said he and several
others were escaping to freedom. He said he wanted me
to come with him. He said he loved me, too and said we
could be together. I turned him down, but promised not
to turn him in. He made love to me one last time that
night.

My father was furious that his slaves had escaped, but
never suspected I had known.

I met a woman named Clara the following year. We were
soon married. We had three children and after that she
became frigid and refused to lay with me. It was just
as well, I never had real sexual desire for her.

When my father died I took over the plantation and
freed the slaves. I was happy when all the slaves were
freed.

I was able to satisfy my deviant sexual desires for
men with occasional interludes with men who had the
same desires. It was never the same for me. Joshua was
the man I loved, but I never saw him again."

Comments and feedback are welcome.