Date: Sat, 14 Aug 1999 08:19:23 +0900
From: Andrej Koymasky <andrejkoymasky@geocities.com>
Subject: Destiny 04

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IF SOMETHING CALLED DESTINY EXISTS...

Andrej Koymasky Copyright 1998
Written on June 5 th 1994
Translated by the Author
English text kindly revised
by Nick

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USUAL DISCLAIMER

"IF SOMETHING CALLED DESTINY EXISTS..." is a gay story, with some parts
containing graphic scenes of sex between males. So, if in your land,
religion, family, opinion and so on this is not good for you, it will be
better not to read this story. But if you really want, or because YOU
don't care, or because you think you really want to read it, please be
my welcomed guest.

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NI - Back to my Country

A young carpenter
going back home at evening:
crickets are chirping!

Back to Japan, several things had changed. The most evident one was that
the Samurais were forbidden to wear thir two swords and their
characteristic coiffure. My father, even if he continued to declare
himself loyal to His Majesty's government, felt for that such a pain
that he never again went out of home -- without his two swords, he said,
he would have felt like being naked. So he remained voluntarily interned
to his house until his death. His behaviour was very much criticized by
the government's milieu, as my father was a well known man and his
silent opposition had a certain weight. On consequence, his attitude
severely prejudiced also his sons' career. Thus I, who hoped at my
return to get a good place at the Imperial University, had to renounce
to my dreams.

On one side I was angry for that with my father, but on the other side,
even if his behaviour seemed to me really exaggerated, I could
understand him. The external symbols are not an end in themselves but
they point out all a set of contents, of meanings. Forbidding to the
samurais to wear their two swords and their hairstyle, was practically
giving them the service letter and dismissing them. It was telling them:
"in the new order there is no more place for you". What after all was
also true. But nobody likes to be told "you, your history, your
traditions, have no more value".

Thus, to earn a living, I had to make do with German teaching in the
High School. It was not exactly what I dreamed about, and I got the
feeling that in this way my years of studies abroad were wasted or at
least underutilized. But it was not in my power to oppose to this new
state of things, so I could do nothing but adapt myself.

I found a small house in the new capital, in the outskirts, a zone
called Shinjuku, that is New Lodgings, for a reasonable price. It was
small but there was anything I could bed and, in a certain way, besides
for its architectural style, it recalled me the little house in Otto's
garden. At first I felt rather lonely, but gradually I got new friends
or met again some of my old friends of the university, thus things
became a little better.

At times we met for the Tea Ceremony -- I really loved these occasions
when I could put aside my worries and immerse myself in the mystical and
quiet atmosphere of the tea sharing. Being able to admire the tools,
precious in their humbleness, create with the others an atmosphere done
of small gestures, of simple things. I loved above all the occasions
when I was invited by a master, a friend of my friends, who in my
opinion more than many others was living in the tea-art spirit. Master
Miyakoshi, in fact, differently from many, didn't go in search for
precious, famous, renowned, rare tools. What he was looking for were
humble, simple tools, who could really contribute to create that harmony
so needed in that epoch of changes.

I just missed a lover to be fully happy. My mother, at out home town,
insisted to look for a wife for me, but I had absolutely no intention to
marry and so, with various pretexts, I continued to refuse to meet with
the "good girls" she continued to propose me each time.

I don't mean I lacked adventures. At times I went to make love with a
young and nice kabuki actor, and at times I could also take home with me
some big boy who, for a few coins, was available to spend a night in my
bed and to please me. But they were all adventures without a story that,
if also appeased me that time, let on me the anxious state of mind and
with the desire to find someone with whom to share my life.

For my delight I draw a portrait of my ideal lover, and I annotated it
with notes on the character I would like him to have -- but it was too
idealized, I told myself, I would never find such a person. At times I
painted again that portrait, modifying it with some features and traits
of one of the boys coming to make love with me, and thus that portrait
became more and more ideal and idealized.

For the house chores, thanks to some acquaintances, I managed to find a
skilled young man called Naosuke, who formerly was a servant in the home
of an artisan. He was not really beautiful, but when he was going around
wearing just his fundoshi, I couldn't avoid to feel for him some desire,
that, with my loneliness, was gradually increasing and strengthening/
So, one night I could not sleep and was seized by a strong sexual urge,
I told myself it could be worth to try. I slipped inside his little room
and, with a mixture of daring and fearing, under his quilt.

"Master!" he whispered waking up, staying still. When in silence I
started to undress him, he let me have my way and rather he made my task
easier so I understood he was willing to accept. When I tried to take
him, not only he didn't escape my desire, but seemed to really enjoy my
attentions. He didn't surrender to my lust just because I was the mater
and he my servant, but because he too evidently liked the sex between
men.

Afterwards, while he was tiding me up, he said: "Thank you, master."

"This is not your first time, is it?"

"No. My former master often came, in night time, when his wife was
asleep. And before he married, also his eldest son come often to visit
my futon, during the night." he quietly said.

I laughed: "It never happened that both came, in the same time?"

"No, master. They knew about each other, therefore they put a sign
outside the door when they came to have sex with me. So there were no
problem."

"Who of them did you like best?"

"Both of them. The old master was more skilled, but the young master was
more beautiful."

"And you, Naosuke, did never slip in the futon of somebody?"

"Yes, sure, at times. When I felt aroused and the masters didn't came, I
went to slip in the futon of of the boy carrying out the heavy tasks."

"Did he sleep alone?"

"No, with the others shop workers. But we did so that the others didn't
wake up, raising no noises."

"You did it amongst the others???"

"Sure. He slept near the deposit's door and in night time the room was
completely dark. He let the door slightly open, that much allowing me to
slip inside, so I could directly enter in his futon, between him and the
wall, hidden by the darkness and by his quilt. He untied and pulled off
his fundoshi and let me take him. Nobody never was aware of nothing or,
even if he was, never talked about it. By the way, I think that not even
that boy knew who was slipping in his futon some nights and took him. He
never saw me. Anyway, we never talked about it."

"But, the first time you went?"

"A night I just pushed aside the sliding door and tried... As you did
with me, master. I didn't know if he would welcome me or not. We were
many in that house, so he could not know who I was and neither see me in
that complete darkness, but he let me do with him all I desired. When I
tried the second time, I found the door sufficiently open, so I
understood he was waiting for me."

I went back in Naosuke's room several times. What I liked in him was
that after making love, we chatted. In day time he behaved with me
normally, like any servant with his master, as if between us there was
nothing. In fact there was just sex, even if really agreeable. But I,
inside myself, desired other.

Other, that nor the kabuki boys, neither the big boys coming with me for
a few cents, and neither my servant seemed able to give me -- love, or
at least affection. No, everybody seemed able to give me just their
bodies, even if at times it was a young, pleasurable, harmonious,
sensual body. And some were also able to give me much pleasure. And
that's all.

Little by little I met also other men loving sex with our gender like
me, and we became friends, but nothing more. We fit well together and we
told each other our dreams, our adventures, our desires like good
friends, we read together ancient tales of love between males, We went
together to the Tea Ceremony, or to the Flowers' Admiration, to theater,
but I would have liked doing all this with a lover.

One of these friends was the English teacher in my same High School. We
met and understood about each other in the kabuki theatre.

When my young actor saw him, he bent near my ear and whispered, pointing
at him: "Do you see that man? He is my brother's lover. he is really in
love with my brother and fills him with presents. Not as you do with
me!" he concluded with a reproach tone. I looked in the direction he was
pointing with his glance, and recognized my colleague Tachikawa. He too
recognized me. Later, while we were strolling in the garden near the
theater, we had a long chat.

"Oh, good evening Fujita-san! You too are passionate of kabuki as I am?
And like mr of its young actors, as i can notice." he said with a not
just formal courtesy.

"A healthy pastime, Tachikawa-san, a sound pastime." I answered with the
tone of a worldly man.

"Sound, but somewhat expensive, at least wit my Kikujiro. But on the
other side, his art is worth a little sacrifice. He could not yet be a
refined actor, but for the rest he really is a genius, in his field. You
never had intimacy moments with him?"

"No, I prefer his elder brother Kikutaro."

"Ah, too old for me -- he must be around eighteen, now. Kikujiro is
fifteen, a real flower. He has lips tasting honey and he is able to play
my flute in a really sublime way. On his back, he is still velvety like
a peach, soft and firm. And his hands are more strong, but more delicate
and skilled than those of a koto player. Right Kikujiro?"

"Yes, master Tachikawa, but let's go, now, or this sweet evening will
flow away even too fast." the boy said him coquettish. My colleague
smiled pleased. We bid good bye.

I looked at them going away towards the pleasure neighborhood. I waited
for my Kikutaro to be ready and, together, we went to the usual
tea-house that would shelter also for that night out love effusions. I
liked Kikutaro because he was physically well developed even he was just
eighteen year old.

Kikutaro was really skilled in bed and was able to give me hours of
sheer delight. But at times, for my taste, he was somewhat too
effeminate, and by the way in kabuki he played the "onnagata", that is
the woman's parts, and he was somewhat too coquettish. Naosuke was more
virile, even if of course he was less experienced and refined, more
rough and instinctive, but he gave himself to me with merry simplicity.

Then, I met Sadao, and took a fancy to him.

Sadao was the boy of the "sento", the public bath-house. I saw him the
first time I went there to bathe.  Wearing just a fundoshi and a
happy-coat, he was cleaning the premises. His fundoshi was well tight
and full and at once attired my glances, as well as hi small and firm
butts. I normally go to the sento on late evenings, as at that time
there are no more women and children, and not seldom I am amongst the
last to leave. One evening I was alone in there, Sadao entered and asked
me if it bothered me if he started doing the cleaning, but he said I
could stay at my ease. I said him to do without worry what he had to do.
Meanwhile i enjoyed his sight and soon I became aroused. Then, instead
of hiding my state, I moved so that, if he looked towards me, he could
not avoid to became aware of my excitation. What exactly happened. I
noticed that, while he was continuing to busy himself in his task, his
eyes glances more and more often between my eyes.

"Why don't you too come bathing?" I asked him with an alluring tone.

He looked at me slightly surprised and said: "I would like, sir, but my
father doesn't want us of the family to bathe together with our
customers. He says it is not correct."

"But it's me asking you, moreover your father is at the entrance
cashier, he can't see us. And at this time no more clients will come. Go
on, pull off that fundoshi and come!" I said, starting to feel more
self-assured.

"I really can not, I am sorry. I would willingly come, believe me, sir.
Yes, willingly." he said throwing another eloquent glance at my
conspicuous erection. I then went out of the wide tub and drew near him.

When I was in front of him, I asked: "What is your name?"

"Sadao, sir."

"How old are you?"

"I am twenty, sir."

"You are very handsomely shaped, Sadao." I said looking in his eyes, and
founding the courage to caress the front of his more and more tense
fundoshi. He slightly blushed but didn't move.

He looked at my body, at my erect member and murmured: "Never like you,
sir, never like you are."

"I like you Sadao. I would like meeting you out of here, to be able to
spend some hours with you."

"Where, sir? Do you have some ideas?"

"You can come at my home, I live in the hose with the wooden fence, just
before the bridge, on the left. There, we could meet without worries."

"The day after tomorrow id my free day, sir. On late afternoon I
normally go to do purchases for the family and I alway usually pass
right there. Will you be at home, sir? Will it not be odd if someone
sees me coming at your place, sir? Will I not bother you?"

"No, you will not bother me at all, on the contrary... There is a back
entrance on the garden, on the side long the river. You will find it
easily, it is a small wooden door with two azalea bushes at its sides. I
will not lock it. I will warn my servant I am waiting visits, therefore
he would not stop you or make inquiries. I will be waiting for you on
the veranda overlooking the river."

"I will come, sir. I will unfailingly come." he answered with a nice
smile, at once shy and pleased.

In fact he came. I showed him in my room and, under the warm rays of the
sun near to set, and that were glowing on his young and sensual body,
feeling filled with desire, I untied his obi, pulled off his kimono,
freed him of his fundoshi and asked him to do the same to me. He was
deeply stirred, his hands were trembling but he already showed a more
than pleasurable erection. The futon was already spread so I attired him
on it. He, docile, let me guide him there. he was so passive and bashful
that for a moment I asked myself if by chance he didn't repent having
accepted my invitation, but i was now too excited to renounce to him,
now that he was there with me, naked and terribly desirable.

As soon as I lied near him and started to caress him all over his body,
it was as he suddenly awoke -- he started to take an active part in my
erotic games with a kind of joyous enthusiasm. It had been really
pleasurable making love with him, as he was sweet and virile at once, so
later I invited him to come again. He immediately accepted with genuine
enthusiasm. I wanted to give him a present before he leaved, but he,
gallant, said that I gave him the most beautiful and precious gift,
allowing him to lie down with me, and that I deposed my gift  in him
when I took him, so he absolutely didn't want to accept anything.

"It is my first time with a gentleman as you are." he told me in way of
an explanation.

"With whom do you usually do it?" I asked him, curious.

"Since we are here in Tokyo, with nobody, nobody before you, I mean,
sir. But when we still were at our village, I did it with several boys.
But they all were country boys, they were not skilled as you are, in
making love. Moreover, we couldn't do it at home, on a futon, but we had
to hide out of our village amongst the wood's bushes, if weather
assisted us, and we had to do it quickly..."

Sadao, a simple and genuine boy, who a day confessed me somewhat worried
that his parents found a girl for him, a girl he had to marry, and were
planning to fix the marriage day. He was afraid h was not able to
perform his husband's duties, because he never felt aroused, or just
attracted by women since when still twelve years old, a youn pilgrim
monk passing through his village, attired him amongst the bushed and
initiated him to love between males.

Sadao, a sweet and generous boy, who when came at my home, before making
love asked me if he was not bothering me, and who in bed did its utmost
to please me in any way, and that afterwards asked me, worriedly, if he
had been able to really give me all the pleasure I desired.

Sadao, to whom I became deeply affectionate, but who I couldn't anyway
really consider as my lover. Because between him and me, besides the
hours of intense pleasure, there was nothing else in common.

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CONTINUES IN CHAPTER 5

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In my home page I've put some of my stories. If someone wants to read
them, the URL is

http://www.geocities.com/~andrejkoymasky/

If you want to send me feed-back, please e-mail at

andrejkoymasky@geocities.com

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